Hold me Tight

I finally realized my fear of closeness is really a fear of being known — I've been working to understand myself better as a DA, in part with the help of Reddit. I now feel the last puzzle pieces fell into place and I finally have a coherent story of why I am the way I am. …

What makes an anxious attached person feel loved? — I’m a dismissive avoidant in recovery. That means I have been working on myself. I would consider myself slightly secure but not secure enough to call myself secure Anyway, my boyfriend is anxious…

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Introduction, Valuable Healing and Attachment resources — # Hi, and welcome! It is a pleasure to have you with us. Please come as you are, we encourage you to share openly and vulnerably. If you do not wish to share and just browse, you are welcomed here to…

To me, the book doesn’t so much denigrate avoidants as it highlight their challenges in relationships, to help anxious types recognize patterns and seek stability—often with secure partners as an idea…

I'm Fa and he is Da and we been togheter 20 years and still not "secure". I read the book " Hold me tight" by Sue Jonhson and am now reading an emotionally focused workbook for couples by veronica ka…

Though as I can guess from any other attachment style (or even mental health issue/relational pattern in general) every person is different, I imagine clarity and communication are key here. I would o…

I appreciate your comment I’m a dismissive avoidant in recovery. I have worked a lot on myself (not everything but a lot of things.) My anxious attached ex reached out this year and for a while,we…

For me, awareness came first, repair later. I actually know the exact dates. I'm not sure what the exact trigger was though. Our situation has been stabilizing, as the youngest has gotten settled into…

I meant the “hold me tight” book.

Hi!! I highly recommend these: For core wounds and relationships : 📚Mathew Micheletti and 3 more The Inner Work of Relationships: An Invitation to Heal Your Inner Child and Create a Conscious R…

Hi I previously recommended these to someone so will copy and paste it here Book on understanding and healing trauma : 📚The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma…

I didn't do any therapy, but I discussed my situation a lot on Reddit and answered many questions about my experience as a DA, which helped me a great deal in terms of understanding myself. My discuss…

Ahh, you are not alone! Unfortunately, trial and error can be one of our greatest teachers. Some of it is learning the pattern or the cycle, then you catch yourself once you see your self entering…

I found the book Hold me Tight was an interesting counter balance to CODA.

Any therapy should be useful to begin with and I recommend some reading Emotional Agility: Get Unstuck, Embrace Change, and Thrive in Work and Life Susan David Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of…

Have y'all tried marriage counseling? If you mentioned it I didn't see it in the wall of text. There's also the classic self help books like *The Five Love Languages* and *Hold Me Tight*, because it s…