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r/datingoverfortyUpdated 30 days ago
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How can I be detached but still keep my heart open?

I don't understand how you can't have *any* expectations of your partner? If we're in a long term committed relationship, I expect my partner won't lie to me, won't cheat, won't break my trust, won't …

r/datingoverfortycomment4/6/2026
Think of the comments as inverted Uber ratings. (click to find out what this means)

Think of the comments as inverted Uber ratings. (click to find out what this means) — I last posted a variation of this a little over 5 years ago. We're a little overdue for a repost. --- You know how every Uber rating is right on the verge of 5 stars unless something's particularly …

r/relationship_advicepost6/10/2024
SEO Results in 2-3 Months

SEO Results in 2-3 Months — I run a small business and am looking for someone to help transform my website through SEO, which up until now has had very little traffic. In the past I have mostly relied on word of mouth and target…

r/SEOpost4/30/2025
Thoughts on a platform that can give AI suggestions layered on top of product documentation (i will not promote)

Thoughts on a platform that can give AI suggestions layered on top of product documentation (i will not promote) — **AI suggestions layered on top of product documentation** Hey r/startups, I’m exploring a product idea and would love to hear your thoughts. **The problem:** Many users land in product documenta…

r/startupspost5/3/2025
The whole I will not promote in post titles thing is just silly (I will not promote)

The whole I will not promote in post titles thing is just silly (I will not promote) — Seriously, what kind of weirdo implemented this rule. Feels like being in a first grade classroom with a strict teacher. Long time reader of this sub but it’s just such a random and weird thing to imp…

r/startupspost5/5/2025
E-commerce Industry News Recap 🔥 Week of May 5th, 2025

E-commerce Industry News Recap 🔥 Week of May 5th, 2025 — Hi r/ecommerce \- I'm Paul and I follow the e-commerce industry closely for my Shopifreaks E-commerce Newsletter. Every week for the past 3+ years I've posted a summary recap of the week's top stories…

r/ecommercepost5/5/2025
This Week's Top E-commerce News Stories 💥 May 5th, 2025

This Week's Top E-commerce News Stories 💥 May 5th, 2025 — Hi r/Shopify - I'm Paul and I follow the e-commerce industry closely for my Shopifreaks E-commerce Newsletter, which I've published weekly since 2021. I was invited by the Mods of this subreddit to s…

r/Shopifypost5/5/2025
What Projects Should I Build That Actually Matter?New to the community plz help 😊

What Projects Should I Build That Actually Matter?New to the community plz help 😊 — Hey everyone, I’m relatively new to Reddit and just starting to get more involved in the dev community. I’ve been learning and working with the MERN stack, and now I want to move beyond tutorials and …

r/webdevpost5/6/2025
Considering a move from big tech to a small company. Worth the risk?

Considering a move from big tech to a small company. Worth the risk? — I know this sub leans junior, but hoping to get some advice from senior folks. Especially people in Bay Area, NYC, or Seattle-type tech scenes. Tagging this as Job Search and not Senior Only because I…

r/UXDesignpost5/6/2025
Should I hide my plugins in WordPress for safety? And how?

Should I hide my plugins in WordPress for safety? And how? — Hey folks, I've been thinking about WordPress security lately and came across this question: **Should I hide the plugins I'm using on my WordPress site to improve safety?** I’m not talking about u…

r/Wordpresspost5/6/2025
Looking for a technical co-founder I will not promote

Looking for a technical co-founder I will not promote — Hey all, I'm working on a B2B SaaS platform targeting a specific form of fraud that's draining revenue from e-commerce and logistics companies. It's a blind spot for many, but the financial impact is…

r/startupspost5/6/2025
Finding Like Minded Business People

Finding Like Minded Business People — **TL/DR :**  Looking for people who are stuck with unsure with what business they want to pursue and end up learning a little bit about all of them; that want to partner up to stay focused with each …

r/Entrepreneurpost5/7/2025
Getting SaaS app rolling

Getting SaaS app rolling — Hey guys, So after about 1 yrs and a 1/2 I am finished building my first SaaS and a high level MVP done. Also my first round funding is secured. Now to be clear, I have done marketing, gathering pro…

r/Entrepreneurpost5/7/2025
Build something meaningful on the side community

Build something meaningful on the side community — hey i've always been someone who loves to start side projects like apps, newsletters, etc. but wish i had other people trying to do the same the communities i join are always super money-driven and …

r/Entrepreneurpost5/7/2025
Feeling smothered by an AP friend…

Feeling smothered by an AP friend… — This is part reflection/observation, and part question at the bottom. It’s interesting and a bit funny to me, I rarely feel avoidant in my attachments. The test I took for this sub, showed all secur…

r/attachment_theorypost7/7/2025
Help me understand-anxious now ex bf + part avoidant ex gf

Help me understand-anxious now ex bf + part avoidant ex gf — My anxious ex and I met in ‘22. Online I was a full dismissive avoidant I began to work on myself in October’23. Since October ‘23,I have been a dismissive avoidant in recovery Recently,I have …

r/HealMyAttachmentStylepost8/30/2025
A message to earnestly curious skeptics and non-experiencers: How to engage experiencers within this community and learn about the topic.

A message to earnestly curious skeptics and non-experiencers: How to engage experiencers within this community and learn about the topic. — We are seeing an increase of activity from people outside of experiencer circles in threads as time has moved on and more and more people are starting to understand there really is a "there there" and…

r/experiencerspost9/4/2025
The most painful relationship and breakup I've ever had, but it cracked me open so that I could heal. I created a text message llm analysis tool that revealed insecure attachment.

The most painful relationship and breakup I've ever had, but it cracked me open so that I could heal. I created a text message llm analysis tool that revealed insecure attachment. — EDIT - TLDR; 8-month, high-intensity relationship. I was DA-leaning; she showed a lot of push–pull/negative lensing. We loved each other and still couldn’t repair, so we went NC. Post-breakup I focuse…

r/attachment_theorypost9/6/2025
How to be comfortable in new, developing relationships without devaluing them for not being as deep as a past relationship (phantom ex?)

How to be comfortable in new, developing relationships without devaluing them for not being as deep as a past relationship (phantom ex?) — After many months of thinking, I've come to the conclusion that one of the things that made my past relationship so special is the fact that it was the first time I had ever been in touch with someone…

r/HealMyAttachmentStylepost10/7/2025
Success Story: FA/Disorganized Attachment Healing Roadmap, Resource Recommendations

Success Story: FA/Disorganized Attachment Healing Roadmap, Resource Recommendations — **Hello, fellow Fearful Avoidants! The below post has grown out of almost 3 years of research and healing this attachment style, which in my case was coupled with Relationship OCD (ROCD). ROCD is a vi…

r/attachment_theorypost10/23/2025
APs what would you want to hear in response if someone doesn’t feel the same as you?

APs what would you want to hear in response if someone doesn’t feel the same as you? — So I’ve been noticing the way a few friends reach out, feels mismatched with how I’m feeling. Usually this is my more anxiously attached friends/most unhealed ones. Often it will be something sugary…

r/attachment_theorypost10/28/2025
Unsent letter to a prior ex, in the midst of a current breakup.

Unsent letter to a prior ex, in the midst of a current breakup. — I am in a crash course on my own nervous system while in the midst of a breakup with a dismissive avoidant man I've loved for almost five years. I'd known about the anxious-avoidant trap for some time…

r/AnxiousAttachmentpost11/5/2025
Both best friends got engaged

Both best friends got engaged — I (27F) have never been in a relationship and struggle to form emotional attachments at all. I've gone on dates and forced myself to keep seeing a guy because he's perfectly nice and there's nothing w…

r/AvoidantAttachmentpost12/23/2025
Trying to navigate a "casual" relationship

Trying to navigate a "casual" relationship — Hi everyone, I (30F, trans) have been talking to/seeing a woman (24F, cis) for about 5 months. The chemistry is legitimately the strongest I’ve ever experienced - emotional, intellectual, creative, s…

r/HealMyAttachmentStylepost2/10/2026
I'm deactivated right now and not sure it's worth trying to save my marriage

I'm deactivated right now and not sure it's worth trying to save my marriage — I'm DA (40M), my wife FA (41F), 3 children. Together 17 years, married 13 years, very distant 11 years (due to my earlier long-term deactivation) with no affection or intimacy at all, working on recon…

r/AvoidantAttachmentpost2/18/2026
Septile vs Novile

Septile vs Novile — Hi friends 🩵 so I've been digging pretty deep into astrology recently, I had been messing around with it lightly for a couple years but now going in headlong. Not to make a career out of it or act li…

r/astrologypost2/26/2026
Books on composite/synastry traditional astrology

Books on composite/synastry traditional astrology — I’m starting to learn traditional astrology, and I’m looking for recommendations on studying synastry and composite charts. I’m especially interested in family astrology—understanding family dynamics …

r/astrologypost2/26/2026
Are aspects to the Ascendant (trines, sextiles, oppositions etc) important to look at when analysing a chart? How do they affect the Ascendant?

Are aspects to the Ascendant (trines, sextiles, oppositions etc) important to look at when analysing a chart? How do they affect the Ascendant? — I know conjunctions to the Ascendant are very important but I've never even considered other aspects to the Ascendant such as trines or sextiles. Oppositions I would guess manifest more through others…

r/astrologypost2/28/2026
Jupiter in Aquarius and the impersonal nature of this placement

Jupiter in Aquarius and the impersonal nature of this placement — This is one placement I genuinely struggle to fully understand. Jupiter, as a principle, feels conceptually misaligned with Aquarius and its traits. The expansive, benefic, growth oriented nature of J…

r/astrologypost3/2/2026
Have your thoughts on shrooms been somewhat like this?

Have your thoughts on shrooms been somewhat like this? — Yesterday I first tried shrooms. I did 15g fresh, which you can expect to be about 1.5g dry ± I've tried acid 2 times before, which were very amazing, intense and long experiences. They theached me a…

r/Psychonautpost3/7/2026
Experienced ego dissolution and timelessness while a friend spiraled into a bad trip believing we were communicating through “waves”

Experienced ego dissolution and timelessness while a friend spiraled into a bad trip believing we were communicating through “waves” — I wanted to share a recent experience because the contrast between my trip and my friend’s bad trip was extremely interesting, and I’m curious if others have seen similar dynamics in group trips. We …

r/Psychonautpost3/7/2026
Why Manifestation can FEEL Forced and Unrealistic (Success & Guidance)

Why Manifestation can FEEL Forced and Unrealistic (Success & Guidance) — Today I came upon a realization that many people do not have for most of their lives. It was the realization that our feelings and the meanings that we attach to them are also affirmations. Right no…

r/Manifestationpost3/7/2026
How do you stop overthinking and care less about things that don’t matter?

How do you stop overthinking and care less about things that don’t matter? — Hello, How do you learn to give fewer fucks about things that shouldn’t matter? I used to think I was the kind of person who could brush things off pretty easily, but lately I’ve been overthinking a…

r/Stoicismpost3/9/2026
When did you finally realise, your life would never be ‘normal’?

When did you finally realise, your life would never be ‘normal’? — I am 47M I grew up in an EXTREMELY dysfunctional household, with every type of abuse you can imagine, and death of a parent at 12. I’ve had to fend for myself since that age, whilst being used and a…

r/CPTSDpost3/9/2026
I feel like I am probably wasting my potential because of family and not making a decision that I should?!

I feel like I am probably wasting my potential because of family and not making a decision that I should?! — Today I was just enjoying the day. The weather felt quite warmer than few days ago. Love the spring season! Then I started wondering... Started thinking like how I feel that I am at a stage where i sh…

r/DecidingToBeBetterpost3/9/2026
Why did it take me so long to realize the neglect?

Why did it take me so long to realize the neglect? — I was always a fairly gifted child and after puberty I started to question everything in the world, society, meaning, etc. I was aware that I was depressed at the time and having clear symptoms of lo…

r/EmotionalNeglectpost3/9/2026
DO NOT GIVE UP

DO NOT GIVE UP — DO NOT GIVE UP!!!!! I have so much to say. But ima try to keep it short ish. I just wanted to make a quick post about my journey. I’ve been “manifesting” for five years. I actually have not. Those f…

r/Manifestationpost3/10/2026
Does anyone else feel like they're "performing" being okay in therapy instead of actually being honest?

Does anyone else feel like they're "performing" being okay in therapy instead of actually being honest? — I've been seeing my therapist for about 8 months now and I genuinely like her, she's warm and seems to actually care. But I keep noticing that when I'm in session I tend to present everything in a way…

r/therapypost3/10/2026
read this if you are confused

read this if you are confused — Yes I have shifted, here is the mindset that brought me to this point. If this does not resonate with you move on. For those who follow the Law of Assumption, non duality etc I intend this will make …

r/realityshiftingpost3/10/2026
The day has come!

The day has come! — For more than 50 years, the Monroe Institute has been quietly pioneering a systematic way to explore human consciousness — beyond meditation, beyond belief, and beyond theory. I’m excited to share tha…

r/gatewaytapespost3/10/2026
Behavior of Asian boys vs. White boys?

Behavior of Asian boys vs. White boys? — I've been wondering about a topic regarding EA and SEAsian boys, socialization, and racialization: do Asian boys behave differently from White (European, non-Latino) boys in any noticeable manner, and…

r/AsianMasculinitypost3/11/2026
planet = sign meaning?

planet = sign meaning? — what does it mean if your planet’s sign is the ruling one like you have a cancer in moon or a aries in mars or a virgo in mercury?

r/astrologypost3/11/2026
One of the loneliest things about being single is no significant human touch.

One of the loneliest things about being single is no significant human touch. — I'm trying to get out of a long term situationship with someone. He's (38m) not right for me (38f) and I'm not right for him​. That has been clear and well known. We're looking to just be friends. He…

r/datingoverthirtypost3/11/2026
I am successfully shifted

I am successfully shifted — Hi! My English is bad sorry I wanted to shift my reality where my sister is alive and healthy with me. I started to robotic affirmation 24/7 and subliminal, I have been locked in my room since 1…

r/realityshiftingpost3/11/2026
Why do people not read dating profiles?

Why do people not read dating profiles? — Just as the title suggests. If you are on an online dating site it seems obvious that reading profiles would be a big part of it? But apparently lots of people...don't do that? But why? It just seems …

r/datingoverfortypost3/11/2026
My experience with NHI's, contact and navigating society.

My experience with NHI's, contact and navigating society. — # Hello! Where do i begin? Firstly, i want to give thanks to this space cultivated by Oak and the other Moderators, without this space, people such as us/me do not really have anywhere to go with a…

r/experiencerspost3/12/2026
Anyone find narcs to be entirely boring?

Anyone find narcs to be entirely boring? — Like no, I don’t want to hear about your work accomplishments for the 100th time. Give me some conversation with meaning.

r/NarcissisticAbusepost3/12/2026
Movie List: Chinese movies where the antagonist(s) are racist/imperialist White/Westerners and get their asses kicked

Movie List: Chinese movies where the antagonist(s) are racist/imperialist White/Westerners and get their asses kicked — I thought I would make a list of some Chinese movies(mostly martial art action films) where the main antagonist is a racist and/or imperialist white. These movies are all fun and feel good, and while …

r/AsianMasculinitypost3/13/2026
I wanted to be recognized as an artist

I wanted to be recognized as an artist — (Non native English speaker, sorry for mistakes) I had 1 dream. Im an artist, i do art. Ok, this is ego talking, but anyway, art is all I do Since i’m a Little girl. I’ve been told I was good at it, …

r/Meditationpost3/13/2026
NHI that Stop Time and Timelessness of the Oversoul; More Research that Supports how Aliens Obscure Human Memories.

NHI that Stop Time and Timelessness of the Oversoul; More Research that Supports how Aliens Obscure Human Memories. — Hi everyone. This is [me](https://www.reddit.com/r/Experiencers/comments/1ai4nzi/i_had_26_physical_contact_events_with_grey_aliens/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_c…

r/experiencerspost3/13/2026
I feel like I was cursed or hexed by someone. How can I get rid of this?

I feel like I was cursed or hexed by someone. How can I get rid of this? — I suddenly feel off. I don't understand what is happening to me but I can't think about anything else other than my past mistakes in my life and insecurities and struggles and negative thoughts in my…

r/energy_workpost3/13/2026
START HERE! - Beginner Guides, FAQs, and Resources

There aren't many but as far as I can tell there are a couple which could qualify. 1. Escapism. Just like anything fun, let alone of the "reality substitute" type, there is the potential to use it e…

r/LucidDreamingcomment11/20/2017
Astral Projection: Quick Start Guide

Hi! So I’m pretty new to this sub and currently trying to read up and decide what I think about AP. For a long time, I’ve believed that reality is a construct in the mind, or just a result of what our…

r/AstralProjectioncomment5/6/2021
Astral Projection: Quick Start Guide

Regardless of what it was, it was a non-physical experience. There can be lines blurred between what is lucid dreaming and astral projection, here's a video explaining the difference https://youtu.be/…

r/AstralProjectioncomment5/30/2021
If you are new here..

a) law of assumption, not law of belief. And where did you get the other descriptions from? I've been on Neville sub for a while, literally noone describes the law in those words or speak in a spiritu…

r/JosephMurphycomment2/18/2022
START HERE! - Beginner Guides, FAQs, and Resources

I had a really concerning dream just now and fear of my boyfriend didn't wake me up something bad was going to happen to me.. It started off in a house I've never seen before the kitchen was upstairs…

r/LucidDreamingcomment3/6/2022
The NO BS Guide on Winning Your Ex Back!

What if I ruined the chance of possibly not getting back together due to me being an emotional abuser??For example, she broke up with me because of unhappiness, goal of finishing her college degree, a…

r/ExNoContactcomment8/20/2022
Analyzing Astrology (Natal) Charts

I personally love the app/software Time Passages for getting in depth descriptions of placement meanings and for chart comparisons!

r/AstrologyChartSharecomment7/10/2023
REMINDER: be kind to yourself. This is hard, and you’re handling it with grace and strength.

I’m sorry you’re feeling this way and going through this. It sucks she wouldn’t give therapy a chance. You can’t control others actions and feelings. I hope you can find meaning and joy in your kids …

r/Divorcecomment7/10/2023
Astral Projection: Quick Start Guide

I am sorry but when you are experiencing an astral projection you know it right away because your consciousness stay awake and powerful, I remember my first time as teenager, the first feeling that ov…

r/AstralProjectioncomment9/30/2023
REMINDER: be kind to yourself. This is hard, and you’re handling it with grace and strength.

Unfortunately I find this reddit to be too toxic to have any kind of meaningful help to anyone without being trolled or attacked here for providing real legal advice. Most of the people here are just…

r/Divorcecomment11/6/2023
Question about Negative Statements "don't, not etc" and mild contradictions in POSM

From my experience the way he described it was the confusing part, especially considering the dozen translations there are of this book. Personally I think that a few things he is not right about w…

r/JosephMurphycomment10/31/2024
Question about Negative Statements "don't, not etc" and mild contradictions in POSM

I discovered that both statements work equally, it probably depends on how accustomed we are to the statement I think. Specifically how well we experience the meaning of the words we use. If we can us…

r/JosephMurphycomment11/6/2024
My arguments against manifestation

Tbh you’re allowed to have your viewpoints but this is attention seeking behavior judging by your posts meant to get a reaction out of the people here. Also, why go on a Murphy sub for this? You alrea…

r/JosephMurphycomment1/24/2025
Quran and LOB

Only these from your long list above, can be argued to relate to the LOB : " *”Whenever He decrees a matter, He says to it, “Be!” and it is.” (Quran 2:117, 3:47, 19:35, 40:68) ☪️* *Prophet Muhamm…

r/JosephMurphycomment2/10/2025
How to heal avoidant attachment?

I feel you. I’ll give you my experience as a FA then suggestions. - I also transitioned from anxious to avoidant our the years. I was never full on AA but more anxious leaning FA as a child. Now I l…

r/attachment_theorycomment3/22/2025
How to heal avoidant attachment?

I think building discernement and self-trust will reduce the risk of "inevitably being discarded". Meaning, at some point in your healing journey, you'll learn to identify people who are good relation…

r/attachment_theorycomment3/23/2025
Before you make that post about some avoidant ex ask yourself……..

Shouldn't everyone be free to stay or leave a relationship for any reason, anytime? I mean, our partners don't own us. I like to think what's great about a relationship is that two people have every…

r/attachment_theorycomment3/24/2025
Before you make that post about some avoidant ex ask yourself……..

You think you don't owe your partner, someone who's entered into a loving partnership with you, anything? That you can just walk away from that righteously, whenever? Sounds like a paltry, wispy comm…

r/attachment_theorycomment3/24/2025
Before you make that post about some avoidant ex ask yourself……..

It was difficult untill last summer when I joined a men’s group, and got some feedback to my story… at the same time I was deeply committed to learning about avoidant’s and how they manage (or more to…

r/attachment_theorycomment4/8/2025
Has anyone else gone from being dismissive avoidant to anxious preoccupied towards their therapist?

I’m a dismissive avoidant in recovery Meaning,I have been working on myself since October’23 Read self help books,exercised,journaled, cried, listened to podcasts and been in therapy since January …

r/attachment_theorycomment4/12/2025
r/attachment_theorycomment4/28/2025
Business scaling up - what cloud provider should we use?

> Question: Does Symfony block concurrent requests by design No. PHP applications run concurrently on each child process of the php-fpm interpreter, starting with a request and ending with it - unles…

r/DevOpscomment5/2/2025
What is k8s in bare metal?

"Bare metal" is a term that older than k8s. Its meaning is derived from virtualization. A bare metal server is a server that runs directly on the physical hardware, as opposed to a virtual server whic…

r/DevOpscomment5/3/2025
How do you persist data across pipeline runs?

Without knowing at least your tools it’s hard to suggest anything. If you were using Jenkins, you could archive artifacts, and then in another run/pipeline fetch it from there. More generic approach…

r/DevOpscomment5/5/2025
Got a 3hr interview coming up. Tips/advice appreciated.

Brush up on the company, what they do, their market, etc. Why do you want to be there specifically. Have that answer solid. It’s really important to convince them you’ll like it and therefore try hard…

r/DevOpscomment5/6/2025
I’ve failed at startups, lived on the road, and I still believe I’m successful

I mean this as a compliment: Everything you wrote sounds super normal in my book. And you're right. Why are you even bothering to define "success" on someone else's terms, though? It's your life.…

r/Entrepreneurcomment5/7/2025
Do push/pull dynamics happen even when you’re not participating in them?

>wanted to stay casual  Idk what that means, exactly. Dating someone... but not really ? The specific rules or the framework of this concept are unclear because "casual" can mean anything, including:…

r/attachment_theorycomment5/8/2025
Turns out I needed a "middleman" to have a successful relationship with a DA

This is incredibly sweet, Im wishing the best for both of you :) What comments are missing is that love and safety is often the best medicine, for everyone. Im not a DA (avoidant leaning FA) but I sta…

r/attachment_theorycomment5/15/2025
How to fix my own FA attachment (ideally without therapy)?

1. Therapy is like training wheels. If you can’t even ‘shop’ for a therapist, meaning: seeing their profiles, interview them, try it out, switch, maybe come back, maybe move on means you don’t have a …

r/attachment_theorycomment6/1/2025
Does anyone else go through phrases where they feel cynical about people easily?

I relate mostly to being anxiously attached or AP and tend usually to score most in that category. But I really relate to everything you described still despite not being DA so perhaps it’s a sign of …

r/attachment_theorycomment6/4/2025
A Metaphor for Avoidance?

I think I may have shifted from secure to anxious when the DA started flaw-finding and accusing me of control. I didn't realize it at the time, but both appear to be common DA tactics once the relatio…

r/attachment_theorycomment6/8/2025
Manifestation coach hired me and fucked me over

Aside from the fact that she has not behaved fairly - what else are you trying to gain from this? And I say this with kindness. What point are you trying to prove? Who else has abused your trust i…

r/JosephMurphycomment6/22/2025
Think I found a secure woman, and almost immediately self-sabotaged.

This definitely feels familiar from times in my past as well. The problem is, when we are so inward looking, and introspective about things, while that carries some really strong benefits, it can also…

r/attachment_theorycomment7/4/2025
How much space do DA avoidants need when deactivating?

Yeah, I think that's the meaning I'm putting behind these words. Than you for a word of advice!

r/attachment_theorycomment7/7/2025
How much space do DA avoidants need when deactivating?

I agreed until the part where you said the choosing is just leading to superficial when I made a distinction between investment and interest. Investing to me includes being willing to do that work. Ch…

r/attachment_theorycomment7/8/2025
How much space do DA avoidants need when deactivating?

I was very careful not to speak in absolutes, and I made a very clear distinction between avoidants who are doing the work and those who are not. You are clearly doing the work, so your situation is n…

r/attachment_theorycomment7/8/2025
In an avoidant-anxious friendship, how much space should I be giving before I reach out?

Okay, this is long and it might sound harsh, but I relate to a lot of what you're going through and acted much in the same way as you did, and I've gone from anxiously attached within a friendship to …

r/attachment_theorycomment7/10/2025
When I want to deactivate I swing too far to the other side to preemptively "sooth" my partner, just in case.

It's everything, I feel so guilty because they are being nothing but lovely and I'm still feeling the need to step away, so I try very hard to show that I also care, I'm also dedicated, I also love th…

r/attachment_theorycomment7/20/2025
Is this Deactivation? Seeking insights from FAs. Please help me understand this

Hey, thank you for the response. I'm kind of overwhelmed with all those thoughts, don't know how to respond to this, but I get your point. I was actually okay until he flipped things, something I didn…

r/HealMyAttachmentStylecomment9/4/2025
Anxiety only triggered in romantic relationship, how to manage it?

This is a great question. I was in therapy for 10 years and also went to countless coaches and therapists. There are a handful of things that actually helped me significantly: 1. Creating deep, meani…

r/AnxiousAttachmentcomment9/10/2025
Bi-Weekly Thread - Advice for Relationship/Friendship/Dating/Breakup

Personally I see red flags. 1) He is overly hung up on sexuality regardless of even making an emotional connection. He acts like he has no control over being sexual with others. 2) There is no such th…

r/AnxiousAttachmentcomment9/17/2025
Practicing acceptance while anxiously attached?

I had to read your post about this same topic in another sub to get more context, so that way I could provide more specific advice. A lot about what you are dealing with is perspective and the narr…

r/AnxiousAttachmentcomment9/22/2025
Bi-Weekly Thread - Advice for Relationship/Friendship/Dating/Breakup

I do too! It’s incredibly difficult to pour into someone without a lot of reciprocation and some days/weeks are better than others. Our relationship is best when we’re communicating, spending quality …

r/AnxiousAttachmentcomment9/25/2025
I think I'm in the process of healing, but it hurts so much. Feeling very forgotten and abandoned tonight

I thought that healing is something I need to do alone, meaning not in a relationship, but an Instagram reel by a therapist spike of something that felt true: attachment issues come up in relationship…

r/AnxiousAttachmentcomment9/28/2025
Bi-Weekly Thread - Advice for Relationship/Friendship/Dating/Breakup

How do you feel secure after pushing a boundary and hurting your partner? Even when they seem to accept your apology? Partner and I are in a rough patch, we are still repairing after a big argument. …

r/AnxiousAttachmentcomment10/16/2025
Bi-Weekly Thread - Advice for Relationship/Friendship/Dating/Breakup

How do you feel secure after pushing a boundary and hurting your partner? Even when they seem to accept your apology? Partner and I are in a rough patch, we are still repairing after a big argument. …

r/AnxiousAttachmentcomment10/16/2025
APs what would you want to hear in response if someone doesn’t feel the same as you?

Personally I dont say I missed you too unless it was true, I would just organize a time to spend time together, start a meaningful conversation, and maybe say “sorry Ive been mia <3 how have you been?…

r/attachment_theorycomment10/28/2025
APs what would you want to hear in response if someone doesn’t feel the same as you?

Ah, I get where you’re coming. From an avoidant perspective, when someone reaches out with “I miss you” and you don’t feel it the same way, the gut reaction is often to pull back, ghost, or give a vag…

r/attachment_theorycomment10/29/2025
Unsent letter to a prior ex, in the midst of a current breakup.

Text of original post by u/f1rstpancake: I am in a crash course on my own nervous system while in the midst of a breakup with a dismissive avoidant man I've loved for almost five years. I'd known abou…

r/AnxiousAttachmentcomment11/5/2025
The most painful relationship/breakup I've ever had, cracked me open for healing. Plot Twist: The text message llm tool said I was an FA, I ignored it for 5 months before I figured it out.

💕…just on my way to work, so no time for a deep meaningful comment…just saying I hear you, I see you…. I am supporting your vulnerability in sharing your self awareness learnings….our strength comes …

r/attachment_theorycomment11/6/2025