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depression
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NC since christmas. got ambushed at easter. abuser parent showed her colors infront of family(socially), first time ever. need emotional support. (struggling to come to terms with MBP,/captivity /starvation abuse and abusers complete refusal to acknowledge) — to preface , id like to say some of my story/past (although, for those of u who are regular here im sure u have seen some of my olde rposts from 2 years ago) the easter incident will be at the bottom…
Long road to dream job and instant healing. — Bestcub called me to write this, I hope it will be helpful to someone. A story like many others. After years of wandering around shitty loa and other stupid spheres, books and forums I finally start…
Being an Entrepreneur is bloody hard — That's a quote from Dan Pena and it's absolutely right. The bum boys on Instagram, YouTube and all the rest that pretend like it's easy are 1000% full of it. The true life of a business person and e…
Do push/pull dynamics happen even when you’re not participating in them? — I (F, 32, originally AP, now definitely more secure) have just gone through a very confusing dating experience. 3 months ago I started seeing this man (34 met on Hinge). He started off very interested…
antidepressants and avoidant attachment — i (22f, FA) came off venlafaxine (SNRI) about two months ago after being on it for 5+ years for depression and anxiety. predictably a lot of stuff is coming up, OCD and BDD symptoms, anxiety is a bit …
I (re)earned my secure attachment this week. What a journey this has been. — I just wanted to share this diary dump with anyone who wants a success story. I believed myself to be FA/A for a long time, and this week I can finally call myself secure. TW: sexual assualt Despite …
Struggling with losing my best friend/coworker, anxious attachment + limerence making it unbearable — Hi everyone, I apologize in advance for this long post. I’ll just post the TL;DR at the start. TL;DR: Lost my best friend/coworker of 7 years after a conflict. He’s now cold/avoiding me but friendl…
Depression and self harm needs to be discussed with professionals. — I cannot stress this enough. Please do not use suicide coded language or express intent or desire to self harm in this subreddit. These are issues that need to be addressed by trained professionals. M…
Success Story: FA/Disorganized Attachment Healing Roadmap, Resource Recommendations — **Hello, fellow Fearful Avoidants! The below post has grown out of almost 3 years of research and healing this attachment style, which in my case was coupled with Relationship OCD (ROCD). ROCD is a vi…
I’m still a magnet to guys who need help. (I stopped rescuing). — I used to be more anxious-ambivalent/codependent and enmeshed from family + an ex-friend. I’ve learned in CBT to separate someone else’s problems/emotions and my own to not become codependent again. (…
What I'm realizing: I relate closest to others with deep trauma and that is a troublesome recipe. — TW: addiction, suicide, physical and emotional abuse, CSA. I have CPTSD, routine struggles with depression and anxiety and the corresponding executive dysfunction. I grew up with an alcoholic parent…
chronic depressed and sad — I have been suffering from chronic depression for many years. Despite many attempts, it still persists and has become part of who I am. Sometimes, I have been able to cope with it. I used medication f…
Weekly Newcomer Questions, Support, Vents & Victories — As the community continues to grow and attract people who are just figuring this all out, we've decided to change the weekly thread focus to be more open and encourage newcomer questions and support. …
A Splash of Cold-Water for you — **Background** Hey everyone, I'm a contributor to this subreddit, and spend time lurking from time to time. I'm quite familiar with every attachment style. I, myself, had to earn security from my ow…
Avoidant conversation patterns are confusing me - should I address them? — I’m (secure leaning anxious) getting some confusing conversations patterns from an avoidant friend. And I don’t know if I should address it or just let things continue to play out. Context; we disco…
I want love but can't push past knowing that I would be a burden in all of my relationships — Hi, I am a 26F and want to seek some advice from this subreddit because I truly do not know who else I can talk about this with, and writing has always been easier than talking out loud. Sidenote: I …
I (28F) cut off my in-laws after how they treated me before and during my wedding, but I get anxious when my husband (27M) still talks to them. How do I move on? — TL;DR: My mother-in-law and sisters-in-law insulted me, fat-shamed and color-shamed me before our wedding and caused major drama during the wedding itself. Now they act sweet in front of my husband. I…
I have done absolutely horrible things. I might be the worst human being to ever live. — 20M. This might be the longest post you'll ever read. I believe I have OCD and do nothing but ruminate 24/7 about my past. I have been in isolation for the last 3 years. It started as a fear of adult…
42M. Do these things basically disqualify me entirely? — I'm 42, Male, home owner almost half way paying off the mortgage, university post-graduate education, full time job in retail middle management that I actually enjoy doing, a bunch of mostly solitary …
Reflection on over friendly therapist? — Hi readers. This is something that has been on my mind for months and I don't know how to wrap my head around it. Some professional insight might be helpful. I left therapy a few months ago. I had …
How do I beat decision paralysis? — My entire life I've struggled with making decisions, whether it's choosing what food to buy at the shop, which route to take on a trip, or more important things like what job to take, or what I should…
I manifested the cure of my disidrosis(with photos) — Hello guys, I will tell how I manifested the cure of my disidrosis. So I will tell how I MANIFESTED my disidrosis😢: So guys, at the beggining of 2025 I was diagnosed with chondropathy, I didn't knew…
Coming to terms with possible childhood emotional neglect - curious how others turned out — As I’ve gotten older and started reflecting on my life, I’ve slowly worked backwards and realised that I might have experienced childhood emotional neglect (CEN). What’s funny is that it actually sta…
My dad told me to kill myself in front of my teachers — Last week I had parent teachers meeting in my school where my dad was present. So my school is a hell hole, because it mentally abuses students to the point a lot of the people here do self harm. Till…
Why did it take me so long to realize the neglect? — I was always a fairly gifted child and after puberty I started to question everything in the world, society, meaning, etc. I was aware that I was depressed at the time and having clear symptoms of lo…
How honest should I be with my new psychiatrist? — The last 2ish months I have been having a lot of issues with both my anxiety and depression and I think I need to change or adjust my meds. I have been “self medicating” aka smoking hella weed… not my…
The phrase "you're so strong" is pissing me off. — ETA: TW tags and NSFW added. I apologise. Had a dysfunctional childhood, abusive stuff of all sorts, was struggling with major depression and being extremely suicidal in my teens, have been through a…
My Fiancé kicked me out with only a few hours notice — This is the situation I am in. About a week ago my fiancé (25 M) brought up how he has some problems with me (25 F). We have been together for almost three years. He said he cant bring up sensitive to…
How do you stay present even when you are feeling the pressure to run? — My bf and I are long distance and he's very very very loving and sweet. The best bf I could have ever asked for. He understands and accepts my feelings even when I'm feeling avoidant, but right now I'…
did you need mental health treatment because of the aftermath — A year ago today I was starting an intense outpatient therapy program because, with my already existing depression, I spiraled so bad after being cruelly discarded it became a mental health crisis for…
I'm sorry, I just want to get out of this mental hell — I'm sorry if I keep making these extreme venting/screaming posts.... i'm just tired of all the bad news in the world I'm a graduated artist and animator looking for a job and goes to therapy, but I c…
Dream journaling is really incredible for recall and now helps me in therapy — I recall all dreams I journal down now. I’ve been lucid once maybe and still fail at that but the recall has massively improved since one week! I have cptsd so those dreams mostly suck but I can work …
I (21F) Am losing feelings for my (22M) boyfriend. Any advice? — Throwaway account. I (21F) and my boyfriend (22M) have been together for a little over two years. It's been good for the most part, and i can tell you that my boyfriend is one of the best people i kno…
Supporting an artist — Hello everyone, I appreciate in advance anyone who takes the time to read and respond. I think in general it will be good for me to get this all out there. My (31m) husband (32m) and I have been mar…
I call it. The Great Depression. My current transit chart
I spent 8 years trying to “fix” my mental health and now I think the real problem is that I’ve been obsessively trying to fix myself — Hi everyone, I’m trying to explain something I’ve been struggling with and I’m wondering if anyone else has gone through something similar. For about 8 years, I’ve been deeply focused on “healing” m…
Therapist told me I was a narcissist during a session, completely shutdown. — Hi everyone. I have been actively looking for a psychiatrist or therapist to take me seriously when trying to pick through cPTSD, and autistic shutdown. The services in my province (Canadian) only of…
My husband (36M) told me (33F) that I don’t deserve love until I’m 140lbs again? — When my husband and I first met, I was around 140lbs. At the time, I was early 20s, depressed, high anxiety, drinking all the time to fill a void, etc. I was freshly out of a terrible relationship tha…
UPDATE: My (32f) fiancé (28m) repeatedly does not clean the house — Hello lovely reddit. First relevant links. My first post I deleted (so you can peruse the comments if you are interested): [https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/18yjl0g/my\_32f\_fianc%C3%…
Finally sober, but I bedrot every day and can't do anything... need help — Hey all, 31F with ADHD and struggling to get out of bed lately. It takes so much energy just to survive. To eat. To go to work. I used to be a drunk, and I drank all of my 20s away. I was an ugly drun…
Can a house drain your energy? — Hello! I’m not sure if I’m posting in the right subreddit but: We moved into our house about 3 years ago with the help of my MIL. Though we so gladly appreciate her help, we unfortunately didn’t get…
My mom was supposed to pick me up after surgery. Instead my son took the bus. — I’m in my 50s and still unpacking things about my mom. Growing up, she was always extremely emotionally absent. There was almost no affection, no comforting, and very little interest in my inner life…
please, take your time to hear my story, because no one else ever did — My mom gave birth to me when she was 41 years old, I have a sister and a brother, my sister is 27 years old, but she has mental problems and behaves terribly immature, so she is always making screamin…
I feel like I was cursed or hexed by someone. How can I get rid of this? — I suddenly feel off. I don't understand what is happening to me but I can't think about anything else other than my past mistakes in my life and insecurities and struggles and negative thoughts in my…
Ex reaching out after 10 years — Hi everyone, my ex reached out to me after 10 years. This was a tumultuous high school relationship that gave me the blueprint for the life I’m living now. The heartbreak was so intense I went on a so…
First post here, don't normally do this but I need help. 27M — Gday all, firstly just want to say hi to all who come across this post, and also forgive me if my grammar is bad. I was never really good at it... What is mentioned in here could be quite triggering …
How to help my wife? Severe depression over lack of suitable work after 2yrs. I'm desperate. — My wife has been struggling hard with life since we moved over a year ago. She has anxiety and depression which has gotten worse. I help by doing more stuff around the home and trying to be supportive…
What We Really Need To Heal — Not sure if anyone else feels this way: but I'm kinda over all the "healing" stuff. Because it doesn't work. And I think there's too much pressure on survivors to "heal". The only way that we can …
Anyone else have a parent with an undiagnosed mental illness? — Growing up my mom was always physically there but never emotionally present. She has never been able to admit to things she considers embarrassing (even if they're really not), being wrong or When I …
How do I “do” therapy? — I started therapy recently after being diagnosed for the first time with depression and anxiety, but I really don’t enjoy it. I show up and I feel like it’s always having the ball put in my court so t…
I was in Barbados… Well actually it was Turks and Caicos but close enough! — I was in Barbados… Well actually it was Turks and Caicos but close enough I just came back from a 4 week long vacation in Turks and Caicos in the Caribbean. This was the 10th year in a row I have don…
Does anyone know if medications affect AP? I'm on anti anxiety and anti depression meds. I have PTSD. I want to explore this and I've never attempted to do it. But I wonder if meds affect the ability?
I don't feel this at all. I question the fuck out of it. I been broken from my ex for 2 months, it's so up and down. Cold as hell then will go out to eat with me. Then ignore my messages then I'll be …
Yes, especially with Divorce. There are SO MANY variables, there is no way you know everything there is to know. The poster is here because the attorney will charge them $500 for the email, their frie…
So I just wrote a comment today on another post that might help too: You’re being too hard on yourself. Your divorce is completely fresh and you need to give yourself grace and allow yourself to feel…
Your original post and all the replies and updates really do help me feel less alone, so thanks! I'm 2.5 months since she moved out, and I'm basically at where you were in your previous post. Which st…
> This sub is for mundane issues such as "I want to stop being lazy" And yet the front page here is mostly about self-loathing, depression, and crippling anxiety.
When I entered this sub it was not like that. People used to post about useful things and make useful quests. Anxiety and depression are not "deciding to be better", they're straight up medical issues…
Well, you can believe me or not, I have no incentive in lying. But the Neville sub has messed me up. Those LOA “teachers” there are messed up - and they don’t even know what they are talking about. “L…
Work - it was my first mission. Daily routine as in the index, in three months I missed maybe 3-4 days due to travel. The result - work in a profession for which I had no qualifications. On the oth…
I feel you. I’ll give you my experience as a FA then suggestions. - I also transitioned from anxious to avoidant our the years. I was never full on AA but more anxious leaning FA as a child. Now I l…
Attachment styles are not the sole factors for attraction we create. But cutting off people we have known for a long time - especially family members, to which we are bound to biologically - is a sig…
What frustrates me is that I’m aware I’m not good but my body’s need for safety overrides anything the therapist tells me. I feel awful for wasting her time when half the session is me too shut down t…
Thank you. Still learning to trust my internal compass. Also, wanted to add to those going through 💔 : “grief is love unreturned.” To give closure to yourself you have to grieve. This is why the no…
I can say absolutely the same about anxious-attached people, but you don’t see me doing that? You ripped my words out of the context. Do I know that I’m avoidant? Yes. I used to be real bad as a teen.…
I mustered courage to speak about something related to my experience of anxiety and depression and took 30 mins to write a post and then I see this.
I think that’s totally possible. Emotional blunting or solving your depression by making you just not really care about most things is how some antidepressants work. And seeming indifferent over your …
This is really interesting. I’m (DA) on an SNRI, and I have no plans to come off it because I can’t risk becoming depressed again. I was always very DA, even as a toddler. I felt nothing way before I…
It’s honestly uncanny, how accurately you have described my own situation - except that it has been a week now and we (me: f34, AP - him: m30, DA) were together for 10, married for 8 years. We were ea…
I gotcha. I asked because I was just curious. Your boyfriend sounds a lot like how I used to be. I never realized I had DA until a couple years ago. Most of what I attributed to depression and anxie…
I do have issues with Sam Altman, yes. He is pushing unregulated technology that perhaps has a great usecase for many but he's pushing it so hard that it's deeply hurting every day people so he can ma…
Reducing therapy as a concept to a script of a two person conversation is a misunderstanding of what therapy is and what makes it effective. Here are three links for you about the danger of AI therap…
Why would an avoidant push me away, but then orbit me for almost 2 years — even while committed to someone else? I feel ashamed for being stuck on this.. I (32F) had a short but intense connection wi…
thank you for this post. this is exactly the use i get out of this community. my awakening was very destabilizing and being convinced myself was psychologically and spiritually exhausting -- i do not …
Going to work is not abandonment. Seeing it as abandonment is what is more of the problem. I’m guessing this could be more related to BPD. Are you seeing a therapist and getting help for your BPD? Dep…
I’m currently going through this, the guy is an avoidant and I’m assuming fearful avoidant. But we have been on and off for nearly 2 years. We would connect and disconnect and reconnect. But he would …
Hey! First time asking question but long term sufferer or anxious attachment! How do yous cope and self soothe and calm? I can never handle my emotions til after the fact. I’ve had issues with anxiet…
How to balance contact with friends and family after a breakup? I'm here after a breakup less than a week ago which left me in shattered. After doing a lot of reading, I concluded I have very much AA…
I’ve also turned to writing for my limerence and it’s been a double edged sword. Sometimes it helps release the feelings. Other times it spirals me further into limerence and depression because I’m wr…
How do I survive getting broken up with when I’m so much in love? Hi! My bf (25M) just sort of ended things with me (22F). For back ground we have lived together for about a year and a half but have…
I'm so sorry you are going through this. While my relationship with my FA ex was short (4 months), it was very intense and a lot happened during that time. I fell for her hard and still love her. We w…
how to understand if he just needs a break or if he wants to comfortably slip out of contact? i met a man two years ago when i had anorexia nervosa still running and was affected from the illness …
after writing with a shy introverted male avoidant for 2 years he wrote me he wants a break and i am free to write him, because he cares about me. i met him in 2023 when i had anorexia nervosa and nee…
Thank you! I can answer some of these! 1 & 2. Why she is my attachment source. Several years ago I moved (back) up to HQ when our satellite location closed. At that spot, people of every background …
Text of original post by u/VisibleAnteater1359: I used to be more anxious-ambivalent/codependent and enmeshed from family + an ex-friend. I’ve learned in CBT to separate someone else’s problems/emotio…
Text of original post by u/f1rstpancake: TW: addiction, suicide, physical and emotional abuse, CSA. I have CPTSD, routine struggles with depression and anxiety and the corresponding executive dysfun…
u/samsworkinonit You are not alone. We are human. Anyone in your situation would feel the same level of fear, sadness, and emotional heaviness. As a military spouse, I resonate deeply with what you a…
@samworkinonit Nope, this is all me. ❤️ Check out my LinkedIn. I’m a seasoned and highly credentialed coach, author, organizational development specialist, and human resource specialist pursuing a doc…
Hi, (18M) sorry for the long story: For context, my girlfriend and I have been dating for around 7 months now. Her and I both have avoidant tendencies but she talked to me about my avoidant tendencies…
Respect. I heard once from an attachment therapist (but can't find a source) that the success chance of healing attachment issues is 20% or less. For more severe end its even lower. I pulled myself o…
My answer has nothing to do with Murphy. English isn’t my first language so I used ChatGPT to help me word this, but here’s my honest recommendation: If you want to explore the **Three Principles** …
Hi OP, very sorry to hear you are going through depression. If you have any mental illness, this sub has always advised for people to seek therapy. Additionally you can consider to seek MC out for Vip…
I thought that I’d finally become more secure, in my recent relationship I was able to speak up about things and set boundaries and feel heard, but now he’s gone (FA dealing with a personal crisis, de…
I am anxious attacher earned secure, after 2 years of therapy. Now I am in a relationship with DA or FA, possibly the second option, hurting as hell, considering leaving them. Everything was ok, for t…
My brain always knows its not helpful, but my feelings or nerves need time to catchup. The healing takes time. Its important to feel, not suppress or run away, let it happen. It's like venom coursi…
hi everyone, sorry for the long post - myself (26F) and my partner (26M) of 6 years have broken up less than a week ago and i've never such acute visceral pain. i'm riddled with the worst physical anx…
Tldr seeking advice for an anxious attachment whose my boyfriend has recently been diagnosed with depression Sorry it’s a little long! So basically at the beginning of last year I (27 F) started not…
[trigger warning] I have a lot of childhood trauma related to a horrible abusive stepfather ( stabbed my mother when I was 4-6, shot at our house when we were inside) I was the oldest sibling and at…
Well, so I'm pretty new to dating, was with my x-wife for nearly 20 years with kids and decided to try dating after some time alone. Never dated before her either, so eventhough im almost 40 I've got …
My win is finding out about dismissive-avoidant attachment style. Since childhood, at very specific moments, I would shut down to people, often those close to me, like family and romantic partners. I…
I was spiraling last year with a back issue that was bad enough that I needed a cane to get around and then treating migraines years before that, which was a similar hopeless process of elimination. W…