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secure guy

r/attachment_theoryUpdated 32 days ago
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mention

Evidence

Citations (18)

A little look into how fearful avoidants operate (aka, how one of my relationships ended - twice - because I was unaware of my patterns)

Thank you for sharing this. Reading your post felt like someone handed me the secret playbook to my own current nightmare. I am on the other side of this dynamic—the anxious partner desperately in lov…

r/attachment_theorycomment10/27/2025
A little look into how fearful avoidants operate (aka, how one of my relationships ended - twice - because I was unaware of my patterns)

A little look into how fearful avoidants operate (aka, how one of my relationships ended - twice - because I was unaware of my patterns) — When I was 21 and *severely* fearful avoidant I dated a secure guy who was wonderful in every way, but obviously not for me. I did everything stereotypical of a fearful avoidant attachment does in a…

r/attachment_theorypost8/26/2025
I think I’ve messed up my habits so badly that I don’t know how to function in a relationship

I think I’ve messed up my habits so badly that I don’t know how to function in a relationship — Hey everyone, This is a bit embarrassing to admit, but I want to be honest because I actually want to change. I’m a pretty insecure guy, and over time I’ve kind of fallen into a lifestyle where I sp…

r/DecidingToBeBetterpost3/30/2026
I got ghosted and I feel blindsided

Also this! Happened to me. Thought I was dating the most secure guy ever. He communicated more than anyone ever and made me feel safe. It only showed in the long run because they can’t keep it up

r/attachment_theorycomment4/20/2025
Turns out I needed a "middleman" to have a successful relationship with a DA

Same. 1.5 years with a dismissive avoidant were the most painful period of my life other than my childhood. I’ve been married to a secure guy for the past 21 years and he’s great at communicating an…

r/attachment_theorycomment5/16/2025
It’s frustrating how often I run into women with Avoidant tendencies.

Anxious woman here and there was one Secure guy whom I was extremely drawn to and was interested in dating but he didn't noticed me because he was in love with an Avoidant woman. Even during that time…

r/attachment_theorycomment6/18/2025
A little look into how fearful avoidants operate (aka, how one of my relationships ended - twice - because I was unaware of my patterns)

This is interesting. my ex was fearful avoidant, and she broke up with me just after 12 days of coming in relationship, and mind you the relationship was at its best at that time.  I'm a secure guy,…

r/attachment_theorycomment8/27/2025
Men having rigid body type preferences

These men are negging you hard. Only insecure guys would do this.

r/datingoverfortycomment3/12/2026
The best and 5 worst things I did after 5 breakups in 12 years chasing unavailable partners, and I just got marriaged on 2.14.2026

Thank you so much for this i‘m still trying to figure out how to get out of this cycle i’m only 20 years old but i feel like i ruined my life because i only fall in love with toxic people. I’ve tried …

r/BreakUpscomment3/18/2026
Jimmy O. Yang's Special "Finally Home" Theatrical Release Dates & Times

You're clearly a sad fuckin loser, so Ima let the upvote ratio speak for itself and peace the f out after this. Rewatching a movie you supposedly think is the "white man's scraps" isn't the win you t…

r/AsianMasculinitycomment3/24/2026
Are Asians really that short, or is it just a racist stereotype?

I’ve heard a lot of people (mostly other men) say that any guy under 6 ft is short—despite the fact that the dudes making these comments are under 6 ft themselves. Also doesn’t help that a lot of inse…

r/AsianAmericancomment3/30/2026
My boyfriend (23M) keeps asking me (23F) to change how I dress because of other men, and I don’t know how to handle it.

That's truly his issue. People will look at attractive people, it's inevitable. For me, there's a big difference if my partner gives attention back to the men who give her attention, then it would bot…

r/relationship_advicecomment3/30/2026
My boyfriend (23M) keeps asking me (23F) to change how I dress because of other men, and I don’t know how to handle it.

Right? A confident guy is PROUD to be with the woman who other guys find attractive. An insecure guy wants her to make herself small.

r/relationship_advicecomment3/30/2026
My [19m] girlfriends [20f] male friend fancies her

Is he pushing or breaking boundaries? If not, it's a non-issue. I have known several women in stable long term relationships that had/have me *absolutely smitten*. I wouldn't ever do anything to mess …

r/relationshipscomment4/1/2026
Am I still AP or I actually earned my secure attachment?

Do you feel confident and calm etc because there is this built in distance? Just cuz of feels comfortable in this moment doesn’t mean the dynamic is healthy. It’s a situationship no matter how you loo…

r/AnxiousAttachmentcomment4/6/2026
my (f22) boyfriend (m25) tries to make me feel stupid any chance he gets

Your boyfriend is basically following the classic insecure guy playbook - tear down your confidence so you think you can't do better than him. When people kept telling him you're out his league he pro…

r/relationshipscomment4/7/2026
Stop being a fixer, and get the relationship you truly want!

Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I appreciate it as I recently dated a FA woman. Once she opened up to me, I understood where her FA tendencies came from, which were primarily her relationship wit…

r/attachment_theorycomment4/8/2026