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Citations (101)
My dad's word for most things I liked was "dopey." Kids' books, houseplants, etc. And yet he was always expressing a wish that I become a scholar and/or a "scientist." My mother could walk into a roo…
ROAST my design before I end up in the streets — Hey everyone, I recently launched a small SaaS project and while I’m getting some traffic, the conversion rate is sooo low. I’m trying to figure out if the design is part of the problem — or the prob…
How to get Millions of $$$ from ANY government for your business (I will not promote) — Experienced founder & CEO here. I'm gonna tell you how my business got straight cash (like literally millions) from the gov and how you can do that too. I've bootstrapped my last german education bu…
The successful are not here — After years of watching YouTube videos about startup / founder stuff and reading blogs, Reddit, and the horrible place that is LinkedIn, I came to realize that 99.9% of advice (especially in the SaaS …
How do you stop feeling of needing to be perfect? — I have no problem getting dates, but things always seem to end after 1-3 months. Sometimes, it was my decision to break up or it was theirs but I didn't disagree. But I've had guys dump me when I thou…
Are these early signs of narcissism? — So I met this guy on Hinge a couple of weeks ago. We do know some random people in common. Here are the signs that I find strange: \- He’s absolutely grandiose - have a ton of projects, ideas, storie…
I have done absolutely horrible things. I might be the worst human being to ever live. — 20M. This might be the longest post you'll ever read. I believe I have OCD and do nothing but ruminate 24/7 about my past. I have been in isolation for the last 3 years. It started as a fear of adult…
DO NOT GIVE UP — DO NOT GIVE UP!!!!! I have so much to say. But ima try to keep it short ish. I just wanted to make a quick post about my journey. I’ve been “manifesting” for five years. I actually have not. Those f…
read this if you are confused — Yes I have shifted, here is the mindset that brought me to this point. If this does not resonate with you move on. For those who follow the Law of Assumption, non duality etc I intend this will make …
I wanted to be recognized as an artist — (Non native English speaker, sorry for mistakes) I had 1 dream. Im an artist, i do art. Ok, this is ego talking, but anyway, art is all I do Since i’m a Little girl. I’ve been told I was good at it, …
Unhealthy Living Conditions with Piano — Like many asian kids I was made to play an instrument. Specifically I was made to play the piano. I'm not that particularly gifted at it. I have hearing issues in my right ear (tinnitus). I didn't hav…
My Divorce Journey - Hope it Helps someone — Just want to share some notes on my journey through divorce…I’ve been divorced for about two years after a 15 year marriage (2 kids) and I’m finally on firm ground with myself. Just some key points …
Speaking anxiety is ruining my career and I dont know how to fix it — Honestly I'm fine in casual conversations. One on one, small group, friends, whatever. Totally normal. But the second its any kind of "performance" setting, a meeting where I have to present, a call w…
Out of curiosity, do your parents even fit the "demanding in-law" stereotype?" — This is a reason often levied against AM for not wanting to date them, but the Asian generation I know who are 1.5 generation onwards are honestly very chill and easy going. And this is doubly true fo…
Be careful. Avoiding conflict has made me more resentful, not less — I used to pride myself on the fact I hardly ever argued with friends or in relationships. I thought it meant I was chill, patient, understanding, whatever. Now I think a lot of it was just conflict a…
After 10 years of doing the most, I (30F) told my husband (34F) that we needed counseling or separation. Help me process? — I met my husband when I was a 20 year old college student and even though he is 4 years older than me, I became a pseudo-mother upon meeting him. For the last 10 years, I have been the sole breadwin…
How I broke free from panic attacks — For 3 years ago I was at the gym. I was doing my normal push routine while all of the sudden I felt immense pain in my chest. I laid the weights beside me and sat down, my heart was pumping, it was pu…
Writing about my experience with Iboga medicine 🌱 — Earlier I made a post and someone commented that they didn't want to watch a video. Understood! Here is an account of what I saw during my time with ceremony number one with iboga. It was not what I i…
We are just 3d Printers — I get it now Our subconscious or minds or whatever it is that we are, are in the 4d. Potentially higher but let's just say the 4d. Time is not a constraint there, you can have many things in an insta…
Synchronicity and the Beginning or Continuity of Experience? — To begin, I have had quite a long winded set of experiences, that have seemed to have calmed down a bit over the last few weeks. They went on for several months beginning 3 months and 3 days before my…
Should I cut contact completely? — Hey there! Hopefully you guys can give me some help here. There is a woman that I've been in a relationship for a year. We parted ways at the end of last year but stayed in contact, only got a real …
Need opinions — 3 months since she broke up with me. We met up in person 2 weeks later for closure and whatever. In the convo we mentioned we didn’t feel the need to block/remove our socials from one another. So we d…
Getting a story about an ex from 20 years ago off my chest — TLDR: Had a weird break up. Reached out after 20 years. Got a response that made me feel bad. Learned a lesson about not trusting what people say during a break up, instead listen to what they do. I …
Me (M21) and my gf (F21) broke up and no contact — You’re probably reading this wow another break up story with the same details. Me and my girlfriend of 3 years broke up. We’ve had prior issues and mostly with me and that was because I wasn’t really …
Should I leave my girlfriend (body count) — So long story short my girlfriend of 6 months has a pretty promiscuous past in my opinion. Let me state this first though me and her have the best relationship I’ve had with anyone ever in my life. Sh…
Overnight success — Okay, so today something really wonderful happened. Where I live, universities are usually 3 years long. Sadly, I lost a family member in my second year. I closed myself off, didn’t study, and didn’t …
36 M Stonewalling me 36 F — I (36 F)had a conversation with my partner (36 M) over the weekend and I expressed I that I was feeling a little lonely and unwanted the past few weeks, due to always making effort to plan things, nev…
i broke no contact — me and my ex where broken up since end of dec, I acted like a crazy person up until mid Feb. havent texted her since early march( was just a mutual misunderstanding and she was nice about it). She wan…
Friendship Toxicity — I used to have a friend of 10 years who would constantly put me down but then pass it off as a joke (she did this to no one else). I could never understand why she’d say the most backhanded things to …
How to stop liking people and be comfortable being alone? — Hi, so for context. I’m a woman that has never really felt a strong connection to ‘womanhood’ or ‘womanlyness’ like normal women do. I usually avoid women’s groups/circles and just focus on me. Also, …
How to be comfortable by yourself? — Hi, so for context. I’m a woman that has never really felt a strong connection to ‘womanhood’ or ‘womanlyness’ like normal women do. I usually avoid women’s groups/circles and just focus on me. Also, …
What do you do after someone declines a date? — I heard from a coworker just this evening that someone I had asked out (different department) is "disappointed that I don't talk to him anymore". I was really into him. He wasn't into me. Or not dati…
Nmom broke my nose 30 years ago. Today, I got it repaired. — Today, I had my septoplasty surgery to correct my deviated septum, aka crooked nose. I told my nmom about the procedure a month ago and she acted nonchalant about it. Whatever. So, today, I’m on my wa…
How to navigate when it feels like your therapist over-explains things? — I never know what to do in general in life when you're in a situation where someone is telling you something that you already know. Since I'm the type of person who is afraid of offending people I usu…
I always let others take decisions and I’ve realized it’s wrong. — Hello, I have realized I have no personality. When I’m put in front of a decision, most of the times I answer “it’s the same for me” so the others in the end are the one to choose. This happens both …
Paying for therapy is anxiety inducing. — It's a huge gamble imo. It takes about 8-12 sessions to get an idea if this therapist is a great match for you, because you don't want "good enough" for mental health help, you want "very good" or "gr…
The fact that someone as terrible and disgusting as me has been allowed to live this long is the world's worst joke. — **(This is a repost of a post I made a while ago, which I am reposting because I'm back in a slump again. There aren't any major changes other than the ending bit.)** 20M. This might be the longest p…
MY answer for ppl's telepathic and psychic abilities in general, stay with me now. — I and many others believe that all humans or living things are interconnected in the higher "soul' realm or whatever. I basically believe that we are parts of the collective conciousness, the all know…
My personal identity is now changed because of my usage of AI — So I have been using AI (ChatGPT) for about 10 months now and was researching animal symbolism and such when it all began. It was the type of thing that would probably pass withing a week or two or ma…
AI is your friend. — I am an expat in a foreign land, and fell in love with a delightful woman here. The first month was glorious and beautiful, but soon after she began exhibiting many of these traits (before I even knew…
Surviving? A permanent trip and skirting the line of orange juice (YOU ARE GONNA WANT TO READ THIS.) — Permanent trip is kinda funny and skirting the line of permanent orange juice (you’re gonna wanna read this) I have bpd and dead mommy issues and I have always just wanted a drug to make me happy, es…
How do I get over the fact that I lost even though I could’ve won? I’m the only one who lost and I hate her for winning. — So my ex is one who seems to just go back to exes constantly. With her other two ex’s, she went back. The first guy she went back to twice and he pumped and dumped her both times and she even followe…
Meeting people — How do you go about meeting new people. It's like, nobody wants to talk to me as soon as I tell them about my husband and I separating. I don't blame them. But this is so hard. I NEED to meet people f…
My Experience as a Beginner — I was introduced to meditation as a teen, when I went through a productivity phase. Just starting university, was going through some stuff, and I wanted to find a "better" version of myself, whatever …
My (M33) wife (F28) cannot accept that I dated a, on what she calls a "low class" woman (F30). — We've been married for 2 months and suddenly my ex was the topic for a month now. I have no idea why this came up in the first place (probably popped up on Instagram). My wife has been really pissed …
My mom is sick and I couldn't care less — Hello. My mom told me recently she has heart issues and she may die at any moment in the next few years. This is mainly due to her never quitting smoking even when her doctor told her to years ago. …
boyfriend [18M] doesnt wanna move out after marriage — ik this whole thing might sound stupid and all but pls help and pls dont say some thing like "you are young dont worry about ts" so me 19 and my bf 18 have been dating for about a year now and i cou…
I need us to find each other again — My boyfriend( 20 M) and I (20 F) have been together for 1.5 years, we are so amazing with each other and we have been together since freshman year of college, now we’re juniors. he has always been a …
About to kick my(27F) boyfriend(27M) out of our apartment. Where do I go from here? — I've been with him for almost 3 years on and off now(I fell in love with someone else when we broke up the first time, but he supported me through all of it). He's my best friend and I can trust him w…
Grew up in a healthy home but was traumatized by a “friend” at school, having trouble feeling valid in it. — To elaborate on the title, my parents have been and still are amazing and supportive people, and I am eternally grateful to have them. For instance I’m a trans woman, and ever since I came out they’ve…
Alone — I was raised by narcissists. They abused me in multiple different ways, did not allow me to see my friends, blamed me for things they literally did, encouraged me to harm myself, stole my identity, an…
I have not been public-facing but generally when people come to me with issues I take care of them. This was due to complaints about a certain comment that made people feel unsafe. It's important a co…
You could take a look at using a matrix for this. Instead of operating systems or other more typical matrix criteria, it would be client IDs or names or whatever. I’m not sure it is suitable for you…
I actually understand this OP. For me it's to do with them being so so wild. Like no context. I just want to meet people as if time and space put us together. We liked the same bar. Whatever. I don't …
I think that no one can get healed overnight and pushing oneself to be affectionate would only create resentment long term. I think it's better to ask space and explain the attachment pattern, and the…
Text of original post by u/rkuchiki123: I have no problem getting dates, but things always seem to end after 1-3 months. Sometimes, it was my decision to break up or it was theirs but I didn't disagre…
It sounds more like you two basically are experiencing an incompatibility in life styles. He doesn’t have to adhere to a schedule and you do. I would stop focusing on the whole how often he texts or w…
I feel like exercising helps and bare with me, but the apps aren't or shouldn't be an issue. Through workouts, eating healthy, and generally taking good care of yourself, you'll truly feel what it's …
Yes, I identify with this and have a lot of thoughts here. I definitely overcorrected. One of the first things I worked on was more open and transparent communication. At the time, I think I was mostl…
Your first two sentences are a little opposite of each other. You start by saying how much you don’t like smoking….but then you soften that by saying that it only matters that you are not pressured to…
I just have a few questions: 1. If you go out on a date with someone and it goes well, you have fun, and you find out the next day that they aren't interested in continuing seeing you -- was the date…
>“If I knew 100% that I wouldn’t date anyone ever again, what would I need in my life to live a fulfilled and meaningful life” Heidi Priebe suggested this exercise for healing anxious attachment and …
Right, completely valid. It’s hard too when it’s reinforced because it’s real all around us and even statistics back it up. Like even if both partners believe men+women should be equals there’s still …
I (25F) and a guy I met on CMB (27M) just met a week ago and I got super infatuated with him the first few days. We share a lot in common and I wanted to rush into things despite my plans beforehand b…
M30 Hooked up with my ex f28 this last weekend after having not seen each other for 1 year. We only dated for 1 year to that prior but it was a fantastic relationship and neither of us has really done…
I didn't know what else to do 🙁 I kept trying to offer my reasoning and opinions as calmly and openly as I could, but people like scotch_please were relentlessly accusing me of whatever. This has ha…
Yeah, we like dancing, going out to eat, taking walks, can do other things together. It does tend to be us doing our own thing on the couch in the evenings, though. I think I just wish I could have mo…
I have this weird juxtaposition in my head where I think Valentine's is a stupid, commercial, materialist "holiday"... But I still kinda want someone to want to buy me flowers or chocolate or whatever…
I know right? 🤣 whatever. I will own it. A girl's gotta do her research.
How do people feel about having a gym selfie on your dating app profile? I have a few i could use, but didn't know if it was a bit tacky, or whatever. I was going to use one because it has a clear vi…
That is fair, I did catastrophise a bit last night. The truth is, I want to see him in person casually first and then I will gauge whether I do want to tell him, ask him on a date or whatever.
So, I don’t think that the girlfriend really cares. She sees you as “manly” or whatever. The fact that you both spent several nights together in a hotel room and nothing happened is a clear indicato…
Well that takes the fun out of being the constant messenger hiding behind their phone on the couch or whatever. The monster don't wanna leave its cave
All of this. I'm partnered, but there are a few people I've met through my various social activities I do by myself that I would be interested in dating if I were available. But I only know this becau…
Growth enough to realize that I have to stop looking for happiness in people. Idk if that means happiness has to come from within or whatever. I don’t really care about being happy anymore - every tim…
>Maybe the day you showed up to book club, the really cute girl your age wasn't there because she was taking her nephew to the zoo. Or had to work. Or whatever. But you won't know if you are a one-and…
I think going to play Mini Golf or something like that isn't such a good idea at least if it's a tinder-date or whatever. Maybe you realize soon you had enough.. Beside that I think that going for a…
Length of time matters for this question. If just casual texting, it's whatever. If a first date is pretty clear that there was no chemistry and I sat with it for a few days, I think leaving it at tha…
I mean, that all aligns with my ideals and values, so I want you and Austin to be right; but half the country thinks otherwise. Lots of people HATED FDR, and obviously the South seceded rather than ha…
Personally I don't think it's important to "dress to impress" but rather it's important to dress appropriately for the occasion and the venue you're going to. I am the one who dislikes dressing up fan…
Im trying my best to be positive and put myself out there, put in effort and everything but its getting frustrating and depressing. The only men who approach me or seem really interested in me I'm not…
So I have this thing I do where I dress very much like my every day self for the beginning dating, I am very up front that I’m going to be in my hoodies and leggings or whatever. Once there’s feelings…
I posted this in the other thread from yesterday but it got locked before I could respond to comments so I'm reposting here with my original post and follow up response: Im trying my best to be posit…
One of my hobbies is larp. So as you can imagine, I have a lot of costumes and enjoy dressing up. My husband isnt in to it. Its just not his thing and thats fine. However not once has he called it or …
I wouldn’t call it a major incompatibility. Just different hobbies. I love gaming, especially online with my friends and my partner hasn’t so much as even tried Tetris (and he’s in his 50s) but he wil…
Totally they can ask the same question back but if they start with “relaxing” I’ll ask oh, what do you do to relax, and they’ll say “watch shows” or something and it’s like I don’t want to dig for det…
For me, safety is about clarity and reassurance. I’m so happy giving a partner space. What I need to know is that this space isn’t a reflection on me or their feelings about me. So it helps if the…
Same experience working in Berlin for 5 years. Ancestry came up occasionally, but I was always “the American” and they would always bring up American stuff to me like Taylor Swift or Super Bowl or wha…
My sibling got new toys, fandom clothing, movies, and video games. Whatever. I can buy my own shit now.
This is it. I cannot thank you enough for putting my experience so precisely into words. It’s validating and relieving, because it’s hard to talk about it in a way that doesn’t inspire instant judgeme…
Eh, I don't think you need to delete OLD, just be more ruthless about ending matches. "How was your day" maybe an instant unmatch, at most give them at a few chances to ask more interesting questions.…
Yeah that's sorta what I would worry about. Could personally never understand it. I have my child 60% of the time, I'm an emergency responder who works on average 12 hours of mandated OT (20 minute …
I just have a minor complaint to bitch about. My boyfriend is planning on moving into my house in a couple months, things are going great!!! He’s calm and sweet and kind and patient and steady and goo…
I teach adults and teens to create a line of energy from the bottom of their first chakra to the chakras at the center of the planet. This is powerful and solves a lot of energy problems. Whatever s…
Trade phones with him and have him take the phone to a place you often go. Your favorite coffee shop or whatever. Record his phone on a laptop at home while he does this. If he gets hateful texts to y…
The only other option that it’s not him is that if he has a girlfriend and she’s using his phone when he leaves the room to go to the bathroom or whatever. She makes these text messages and then delet…
That’s exactly what I said in my comment. The only way it could be him not knowing is if his girlfriend is using his phone when he leaves the room to go to the bathroom or whatever. Because I’d be cur…
>his girlfriend is using his phone when he leaves the room to go to the bathroom or whatever. I envision them at the lunch table in the breakroom gigling over it while she types.
It’s insane how bad the future looks with this technology. We’re going to live in a post-truth world and the majority of people *already* had trouble discerning fact from fiction before LLM slop was a…
Honestly if it's a chore you both dislike just do it less. My husband and I will cook one big meal each which will last three days and we eat out on day 7. If anything is going to derail the batch coo…
In your situation I think it’s fine. I just didn’t because I was still married and living together officially. Not in the same rooms or anything. She did whatever. I didn’t initiate my divorce, so I g…