Gaslight

My parents are really scaring me now. Time for adult services (if don't sound unhinged)! — Hi all. I am so sorry for posting again, but something happened today which has left me shaken. I have a feeling that what I am about to share is going to make me sound unhinged but I have back up fro…

Does attachment style start to shift after cutting out toxic family members? — Recently, I removed a toxic family member from my life after years of emotional turbulence and manipulation. This person liked to gaslight me, hold past mistakes over my head, and blame me for everyth…

Hosting Company Gaslighting Strategy? — I work as a sub-contractor for a marketing company and their biggest client uses a niche hosting company that is more paranoid than Elon Musk in a bunker. I have to install Wordpress manually, do manu…

What will it take? — Seriously… What does it take to land a UX role these days? My wife is graduating with her masters in UX from a good program but it seems that the industry is evolving and everyone is making it seem …

I (re)earned my secure attachment this week. What a journey this has been. — I just wanted to share this diary dump with anyone who wants a success story. I believed myself to be FA/A for a long time, and this week I can finally call myself secure. TW: sexual assualt Despite …

Deactivation or undisclosed breakup? — I'm a FA woman...in a relationship with a dismissive avoidant....all was good, until past Christmas holidays , his bday and all situations when they deactivated.. he was the one who planned being wit…

Coaches — So,we all know the scam of RAIN I wanted to talk about this other girl ‘Amara innerpower’who keeps posting in various Ng groups on Facebook. Beware of this one too and never ever pay any coach for mon…

I Genially Think My (35F) Husband (36M) is a Psychopath — Hi everyone, please I need help. I’m 35F and my husband is 36M. We’ve been married for 10 years and have two boys (7 and 5). I honestly don’t know what to think anymore. About three months ago my hus…

My mom called my son’s birthday party “f***ing embarrassing” because she cares more about what people think than celebrating him — **UPDATE:** Thank you to everyone who commented and shared advice. A lot of people suggested going no contact with my mom to protect myself and my son. I understand why people said that, but I want …

Healing is noticing abuse in REAL time. — One of the signs of healing is, noticing abuse IN REAL TIME. When I mean abuse I mean the manipulations, passive aggressiveness, taking jabs at us, gaslighting and anything that is harmful or disrespe…

Friend said something that shocked me and explained everything... — Edit: added an extra story to the bottom since this post seemed to resonate with people so much. Be strong folks, you're no one's NPC. You can go back and find a lot of my story on my page, but essen…

My biological mother sexually abused me in such weird sadistic ways throughout my childhood and I’m wondering if anyone else has experienced this — For context I am a 20 year old girl I was raised by my two lesbian parents they got a sperm donor and had me and my twin sister. Starting since I’m assuming a toddler up until about 13 my biological m…

It's not lovebombing. It's grooming. — Adult grooming is a pattern where someone gradually (or rapidly) builds trust, lowers boundaries, gathers leverage, and conditions an adult target to tolerate confusion, dependency, secrecy, or sexual…

I hate everything — I got threatened with marriage because I seemed like I gained weight through video call. And because I had the audacity to wake up late. And my brother is a piece of shit that sees nothing wrong ever …

I hate narcissists! — I tried so hard to forgive. I even made a comment here months ago about forgiveness. I was trying to delude myself. Narcissists deserve to rot and burn in the lowest depths of hell there is. How can y…

First post here, don't normally do this but I need help. 27M — Gday all, firstly just want to say hi to all who come across this post, and also forgive me if my grammar is bad. I was never really good at it... What is mentioned in here could be quite triggering …

My wife got pregnant and immediately turned into a completely different person. It’s like she’s trying to destroy me. — Alright lads, need to get this off my chest. Been with my missus 6 years, married 3. We planned the baby, dead excited. The second she got the positive test? Complete personality transplant. Swear dow…

The absolute dearth of any kind of help for victims of polyamory under duress — Nobody understands. There is literally nobody to turn to. Since the APA mandated that polyamorous relationships be accepted this has become a topic I cannot bring up anywhere. Nobody wants to talk ab…

My mother sent my childhood abuser to my home, after I have been successful at making sure he never knows where I live. — Conversation is below. I have been very careful making sure my brother never knows where I live, as he beat me as a child so much police intervened and I was such a mess I was mandated to go to thera…

I (32F) trusted my partner (34M) completely until I discovered he lied about a “friend” he talks to daily and that they were texting very appropriate. I’m shaking and feeling lost — I’m a 32F and my partner is 34M. We’ve known each other for many years and have a long history together. We were apart for a while in the past but recently decided to try again because we both felt th…

THINGS TOXIC "SHIFTERS" SAY/DO (they are more normalized than you think) — Soo days back I made a post voicing frustrations about my shifting experience and mentioning a few a of my roadblocks. Two days ago I shifted successfully to the Odyssey and when I came back to my cr…

The dangerous 'toxic positivity' of AI therapy: A personal story — **TL;DR:** I used a customized Gemini "Gem" as a complementary therapist, but it completely failed to spot a predator. The AI interpreted extreme red flags (love bombing, gaslighting, and manipulation…

Taking advantage of the neuroplasticity to remove insecurities — Hey, i was wondering, would it be possible to take advantage of the neuroplasticity window while tripping to help with removing life long insecurities? I have always been insecure about my appearance…

Calling AM on her bluff, even if it means she becomes homeless — \*\*\*\*Warning this contains Abuse, this is not for everyone if you’re under 18 please do not continue reading this. I’ll try to make it brief. My AM was a single parent of 5 kids. That’s where he…

I got into medical school but my mother is still ashamed. — I (24f, Filipino) recently got accepted to medical school away from home. For context, I had a conditional acceptance for my local medical school that did not work out in the end. After 3 cycles and 4…

Why keep on livng? — First of all, let me state that I do not have intent to take my life. I do have some ideation thought, but I'm doing therapy and I know will be fine. I just genuinely want to know, why keep on living?…

It takes two to tango lie can be gaslighting — we can stop equalizing blame just because it’s easier for the audience, If one partner is home building a life and the other is out destroying it, that is not two. It took one person to be a partner a…

I (21M) have survived two decades of severe physical, emotional, and financial abuse from my Indian parents. I'm finally exhausted and need to tell my story. I am not free yet. — # TL;DR: I'm a 20-year-old only child in India who has endured severe physical, verbal, emotional, and financial abuse from my parents since toddlerhood. They have beaten me, medically neglected me, …

Text that Blew Apart My Entire Life — Note: This is a repost of a post I made a couple of days ago. I deleted it because it was made from my 10 year old account and I needed to make a throwaway account to work on my issues in case my STBX…

if you're in this vibe, you're not alone — some of the vibes I've observed on a personal level now, has a lot to do with past pain resurfacing around "muggles," and the "muggle world." specifically the antagonistic energies we experience as in…

Let avoidants heal themselves before they destroy you. — Hey everyone. This is my last post on this sub because I honestly don't even want her anymore. But before I leave, I want to tell all of you, guys and girls of any age: DO NOT GO AFTER AN AVOIDANT PAR…

society pushing the "your parents did their best" nerrative — I grew up in a dysfunctional home to say the least. I do not remember my parents caring for me and they taught me nothing - not academic nor necessary stuff (like laundry, period, showering etc.) and …

Something I wished I had heard about sooner when I struggled leaving my now nex that would've made me leave a lot earlier. — Why we stay is because of trauma bond and hope even though they play on that and say to you "if I am abusive why don't you leave", unhealed empaths stay because we delude themselves on what they could…

The deep scars of emotional neglect. — I am the 4th, and youngest child of an emotionally unstable, single mother. Growing up with her was hell. You never knew what you were going to get. One day she would be distant and completely unrespo…

Series of constant projections, seeking to stop. — For the people out there that are living with projections from the other side or whatever it is, I was wondering what have you done that is effective in reducing or stopping it? They are over the to…

Potential — I made another post a few days ago regarding starting the tapes. I did Orientation and it was mind boggling how some of the sensations came to be. I wanted to ask, and this may not be the place for …

Taking a break in relationship — Me and my gf of 1,5 years where having some problems in our relationship. Such as fighting over little things, being too attached to each other to the point where we couldn’t spent a day not texting. …

My nervous system is ruining my life. — I'm 28. I live in a constant state of fight or flight (and sometimes fawn/freeze). I also carry a large amount of shame, which manifests in different ways. My nervous system is incredibly sensitive a…

Healing — It’s been 3 weeks since we broke up. 5 years 3 months 2 days evaporated. You showed me your true colors right away with the lies, gaslighting, and cheating. I endlessly gave you the benefit of the dou…

Writing a book for male survivors of emotional manipulation and controlling abuse/coercive control. — Wasn’t intending to post anything yet as this is still very much in draft; but I said I would, so here it is. I am writing a book for male survivors of domestic and family violence; not physical abus…

First visit after going no contact. Support needed. — I (31f) went semi no contact with my narc mother in November 2024. What I mean by ‘semi’ no contact is that I had her blocked on everything except for email - which she of course utilised to the best …

Financial abuse is still abuse — I'm 70 years old. I've been in and out of therapy since I was 16. With the rise of awareness about narcissism, especially over the past year for me, I'm seeing more and more ways my nmother and n-ex a…

I did it.. — I blocked him. Everywhere. No doors left open. Because I can't take it anymore. I'm in love with someone who could not give the slightest shred of a fuck less about me. Somebody that destroyed me em…

The hypocrisy of AP (suicide warning) — Last year, I hit rock bottom. I had no job, no relationship, and all I could think about was using drugs. I was living with a roommate at the time, and I went through an existential crisis. It felt li…

how to get through the last year until i am 18 — i am 16, i work full time and have straight As and Bs in school. i have 10k about saved up andhave another year to put as much money in it as i can. i need to get out of here, i dont know how much lon…

I just watched a video on how ADHD makes us prime targets for abusive/narcissistic behavior, and I feel so defeated. — Hey everyone, I’m writing this because I really need to vent and see if anyone else here with CPTSD and ADHD has experienced this. I just finished watching a video by a creator named Danish Bashir a…

I finally drew the line — My story is your story, my pain, the same as yours. We all committed, believing that all humans essentially see each other as valuable only to be shown multiple times per day, that in fact some humans…

Looking into the Abyss — ​ For 15 years I lived with a man I considered responsible, honest, hardworking, and who loved me in a profound way, so profound that even facing unemployment, financial setbacks, what I thoug…

Well, she's gone. [trigger: death] — I posted here maybe six months ago about my terminally ill Nmother, and how my brother and I were navigating that situation. Well... here's how it went. In efforts to preserve my brothers sanity, I e…

Did anybody else become the crazy SO/ex? — The narcissist was constantly cheating on me and gaslighting me about it and I resorted to behaviors that I'd never done before. I paid for a snoopreport subscription to track his instagram likes/foll…

My story of confusion - need advice — In early 2024, I met a woman from another country, and we embarked on a long-distance relationship that initially felt like a rare, once-in-a-lifetime connection. For the first two months, we were in …

Really solid points and then there's space for legitimate concern regarding abusive relationships. Basically, the “Power & Control Wheel”, like instances of sexual harassment/ assault, emotional abuse…

Honestly it feels like gaslighting. The people who post here know the difference between a discard and things just not working out. there’s no reason to bring that up other than to make people feel gu…

Maybe (as an FA) I can offer some insight… I was raised by a narcissist. In spite of my best efforts (15 years in therapy), I still have a high risk of ending up in a relationship with one. The mom…

Absolutely not. A good therapist will steer you out of your bullshit behaviour, an ai will just go 'yassss girlboss gaslight gatekeep' and make you believe it's everyone else who's the problem. Not be…

I just broke up with an FA 3 weeks ago. After 4 years of a hard pattern playing on repeat. The only difference is improvements were being made but mostly because I was working really hard to heal my o…

The same ‘fight’ keeps getting picked as I’m trying to educate the world about how psychiatry is questionable medicine at best. The problem here is the world believes that it is real medicine, thus …

Oh, we're talking about the sex part now? I thought we were talking just about leading the relationship in general 😁 In sex though, I don't think im motivated exactly by bounding them so they can't r…

I don't grieve after breakups. Like, at all. If not for my AA ex I would think Im a psychopath or something, because my love can be shouted dead with just a few words like that. It's like an unforgiva…

Na, I disagree... I went away and researched why I was like I was and understand it well. The converse of that is that if a good partner knows you are anxious they dont treat you jn a way that caus…

It's not gaslighting if you both agree to take a break to breath which is what op is talking about  The projection here is wild "Love liberates, it doesn't hold"

She talked shit about me being obsessed with her, while unbeknownst to my friends she was breadcrumbing me, emotionally manipulating me and gaslighting me. The angriest I’ve ever seen her was when I …

That is the exact reason that made me feel anxious in relationships. I used to be very independent and confident. Until i got cheated on and gaslighted. Then I got cheated on and gaslighted. Then …

It doesnt change anything: you were always right he was always gaslighting. Burn that bridge.

The confirmation bias is as real as it gets.I get exactly what youre saying. Theres this app called Keypr, in India where they match based on your attachment and conflict styles. Helped me break out o…

I have this thought spiral frequently. I am also very susceptible to gaslighting so after my last relationship, I had no ability to trust my own thoughts. I am still dealing with this but something th…

When I walked away from my FA, I sent her an email, a pretty lengthy one, that fully held her accountable for her actions and her behavior. I pointed out all of her gaslighting, her manipulation, the …

Both things can be true. It sounds true that he is emotionally unavailable for a healthy relationship and could never give you what you needed. It is also true that the lack of deep connection activat…

Can you talk more about the “ptsd” like reaction and projection? My ex’s ex had BPD and he would often use words and phrases straight out of a BPD textbook to criticize me (like telling me I had a “co…

Wow I am sorry. I have felt similarly before and it is such a terrible thing to experience. There was a time, even, where I was paranoid that I was NPD (despite being, if anything, the complete opposi…

All of that sounds very anxious attachment related. When you are operating out of fear (basically anxious attachment) your priority becomes to make that feeling go away, and you put it on the other pe…

Oh my god, OP does not need to introspect and gaslight herself here. This is not AA.

In a similar phase of “The Work” myself so here’s my two cents: I’m learned that when the overthinking becomes the driving force behind my emotions, motives, and actions, that’s when it’s obvious I’…

It amazes me (in the worst way possible) how they successfully gaslight avoidants into thinking we're selfish when we're actually are accommodating to a fault. And to make matters worse, if these ar…

Of course the fearful avoidant is gaslighting us into thinking it's all the anxiously attached partner

Honestly, I don’t think Ive had that experience as an FA. Ive more so felt like I couldn’t trust myself after activation. Feeling betrayed, furious etc over the weirdest things, and then the next day …

I know. It's a pet peeve of mine. There's a time and place for applying attachment theory but it's so over- and misused. Same for terms like "gaslighting" and "lovebombing," they've become like relati…

u/AnonForeverIDST HOLY SHIT! That POS sounds very familiar....to my ex. Yes, we broke up. But...I broke up w him like....he had a count and said it was up to 50! I really think he was a trauma bond, …

Stop gaslighting yourself! It’s not superficial to want someone with basic hygiene.

But what scared me was I intended to give him a try until I decided I couldn’t take the gaslighting anymore.

Ditto. I notice at times I get waves of anxiety about how much my partner actually wants/likes/invested in me, and if it's as much as I do. There's really nothing wrong with him, in fact he's been sh…

Uranus (in mid-Taurus, a few years ago) square natal moon (Aqua). I got into a relationship with someone who seemed great at first, but was bad for me. It was confusing because we explored a lot of th…

Heey :). Earned secure, formerly FA here. \- sorry, this got very long :P <3 I relate to this behaviour so much. I can really understand how difficult saying no, setting boundaries and advocate fo…

Cant say when it became a thing, but anecdotaly It goes along with a phrase in kink that I vibe with. " Anything not a enthusiastic yes is a no" and honestly appreciate that as a mindset and how i go…

Shadow industry. Entities galore. It's dark. And whatever people may choose to believe, it's no different from doing it in real life energy-wise. And think about it, are the people in the videos happy…

She's breaking up with you OP not a doubt in my mind. Most women I've dated are cowards and will rather torture you for months while they do there own thing then tell you the truth. End it now before …

Huh. This is an interesting take. Yeah, she may have been pretending to be someone she is not in the first months. That version cared about me. The version afterwards was just nostalgic about the vers…

Yeah, the gaslighting isn’t fun. That’s how I got stuck in over explaining mode doing the whole justify, argue, defend, explain mechanism. It’s like I have to play lawyer every time because I assume n…

I can’t really see mine anymore thanks to health issues constantly fucking my ability to meet schedules, but back when I was seeing mine my mother was CONVINCED all I did was complain about her, just …

Every single choice of hers in this post reflects the fact that you're not actually cared for, respected, or yearned for in the slightest. I would straight up ghost for the sake of your mental health.…

Yeah I agree with other people. The relationship has already ended for her and she thinks it's just easier to gaslight you and mentally check out, rather than actually ending it. My ex soon started ta…

This isn't gaslighting, it's just lying

Did anyone else get this gaslighting but also your parents constantly telling you how “spoiled” and “lucky” you were during the abuse?

First of all, I'm sorry to hear you were tortured like that. I really hope that you've since found people you can trust and have gained some measure of peace and even healing. I will ask: why wouldn'…

> When I expressed that this is bothering me deeply and impacts how I view the security of our relationship, she told me I was overreacting and accused me of stalking her pages (I had only checked onc…

yes thats very true. he deep down hates himself and that’s the problem. he superficially cared, because when a person is abusive, such as gaslighting, manipulating, blame shifting and making you hate …

Dude just leave her. She will cheat again and gaslight you into thinking you did something wrong (which you might have, but cheating is never acceptable) therefore justifying her own behaviour. Mark …

Bruh. Your (ex)gf has broken up with you. Drop it and move on. You deserve someone who will speak to you directly, not just ignore you and gaslight you into believing there’s still something there…

It's okay. I was in an 11 relationship that when it ended I realized it was a situationship. 😭 It wrecked me when he abruptly ended things. We love who we love. They lead us to think it'll be more w…

So I don't know about 2 or 3 but I am familiar with 1, I never did 1 but I have a few observations and theories on while my male brothers do it. So understand most men don't find the same value in com…

And the porn user's partner. I find it interesting how no one else has mentioned this when half of porn users are coupled. For one, most women are hurt by it and do not want it in their relationship a…