helped

Oh boy do I love being exploited(Long rant, life story, lots of heavy stuff) — Hi, new here. I'll just go ahead and describe my relationship with my parents and my general environment, cuz I've been stuck in a cycle of depression and toxic optimism since childhood. For conte…

Sharing my learnings as a mid-seniority job seeker — I started job-hunting in April. After two weeks of sending applications and receiving zero feedback (only ghosting), I scheduled a few calls with my mentor. Based in Eastern Europe and looking for a f…

SEO Results in 2-3 Months — I run a small business and am looking for someone to help transform my website through SEO, which up until now has had very little traffic. In the past I have mostly relied on word of mouth and target…

Can you successfully use AI humanizers to improve SEO — When working with AI-generated content for SEO, it’s always a balancing act. On one hand, I want the content to be optimized with keywords and structure, but on the other, I don’t want it to come over…

I struggled with posting consistently as a creator — so I built a tool to make it easier — Between content planning, editing, and just staying active online, keeping up with social media as a brand or creator can feel like a full-time job. I built a small tool that helps schedule AI-powere…

New to SEO and Trying to save my local business — Hi Everyone! I run a local companion care service for seniors and I’m staring down what feels like an impossible mountain with SEO. I’ve watched countless YouTube tutorials, learned a bit about on-si…

Any suggestions on the most worth-it UX AI certifications or programs? — After years of holding off on this, I’m finally in a decent place to look into the AI side of UX and am looking for deeply insightful, and valuable AI certifications or other tools that is more practi…

I’ve decided to go all in on my mental health tech startup — how do I fully shift from side project mindset to founder mindset? - i will not promote — Hi, I run a platform with digital tools to help people build mental strength and emotional resilience. Until now, I’ve treated it like a serious side project, but starting today, I’m committing to it…

Is Mobile Performance 70 Acceptable on PageSpeed Insights to START Blogging? — Other Mobile Scores: 92 Accessibility / 100 BP / 92 SEO Not that matters, but desktop is: 97 Performance / 91Accessibility / 100 BP / 92 SEO Before I start banging out blog articles, I wanted to ma…

My experience winning a chargeback — Sharing my experience winning a chargeback recently. We specialize in gaming collectibles, and our store has been running online for 3ish years. We have had 2 chargebacks in that timeframe, and won bo…

Routine to get programmatically better — Hey fellow webdevs, I have an issue. I have no problem working at my current job working with various systems/technologies e.g. Shopify Liquid, NextJS, Twitter, Astro etc. I can build components well…

Weird behavior with display grid and overflow — Please help me make sense of the fact that we need to set overflow to hidden to .right for the layout to respect the grid-template-rows property in this example: https://codepen.io/Jcbz/pen/XJJYKRg …

Best low-effort analytics tools for Shopify optimization? I'm drowning in data... — I'm struggling to make sense of all the analytics data from my store. The native Shopify reports give me tons of information, but I'm finding it difficult to determine what metrics I should actually f…

Anyone here navigating entrepreneurship with ADHD? How do you manage focus, procrastination, and distractions? — Hey everyone, I wanted to reach out to the community to see how many of you might relate. I've been wondering lately if I might have ADHD — I haven’t been officially diagnosed, but I know a lot of pe…

What Platform Engineering Really Means (and How It Differs from DevOps and SRE) — Hey all, I just wrote a piece breaking down what **Platform Engineering** is — not just as a buzzword, but as a real discipline that’s emerging in many engineering organizations. 🔧 **Key takeaways…

Aspiring Dance Studio Owner - First Steps? — ~ TL;DR: Aspiring dance studio owner (currently in school). Active in the dance community and planning ahead. Looking for first-step advice, financial tips, and mindset guidance from other small busi…

How do you effectively refine wireframes into a responsive design? — I’m currently working on a website redesign and started by sketching out some wireframes to get the structure right. I found some great wireframes on [wireframes.org](http://wireframes.org) to use as …

Underestimated fulfillment in my eCommerce startup, nearly paid the price — When I launched my first eCommerce brand, I thought fulfillment was "easy" find a product, set up a store, ship orders. Simple, right? I couldn’t have been more wrong. As soon as we got traction, thi…

Am I overreacting? — My husband and I own a small business that is doing pretty well. It is very 50/50 and we are equally as important in this business. He constantly refers to things as “my employees “ or “my drivers,” o…

Small Business Case Study: How We Grew Our Instagram & TikTok with an AI Social Media Assistant (No Ad Spend!) — **Post Body:** Hi everyone! I co-own a small business (a boutique cafe + online store) and wanted to share our experience using an **AI “social media assistant”** to grow our Instagram and TikTok. W…

"I quit my engineering job due to anxiety and built a small business—how do I scale from here?" — Hi everyone, I wanted to share my journey and ask for advice from those who’ve scaled small businesses. I studied chemical engineering and got placed in a great company right after graduating from S…

The dismal state of WordCamps in the US — I used to enjoy attending WordCamps for learning, networking, etc. I even helped organize one in Providence, RI years ago. I looked at the [WordCamp Central schedule](https://central.wordcamp.org/sc…

AMA - Agency Owner — When I first started a marketing agency in 2019, my biggest issue was getting leads. I transitioned after learning about lead generation to a full service lead gen agency and want to give back to the…

Int'l Package Delays at Customs Clearance? — Just wondering if this was affecting everyone. We're having packages sent via Fedex/UPS, import and export, just sitting in US Customs Clearance for days every since the Liberation Day tariffs and De …

Tried all the steps to bootstrap, without funding. I will not promote. — I will not promote. So I spent a lot of time in the local world volunteering. All with the spoken language of "here's how you get your startup funding". So I've helped with community projects, other s…

Turns out I needed a "middleman" to have a successful relationship with a DA — Now the title may sound wild, but stick with me. # The Story So I (26M) have been dating someone (24F) who, as I came to realize, is a dismissive avoidant. It's been about a year now - though truthf…

You know what sucks about being in the process of healing your attachment type? Dating someone who has no idea they have an insecure attachment and you're just wasting all that hard-earned security on someone who doesn't care — I've been fearful avoidant most of my life, and it's helped me in abandoning very healthy partners because I was too blind of my issues. For 2 years now I've been working on myself and seeing huge s…

Seeking self-closure — To give a brief overview. Had a multi year situationship with someone I had fallen for, a fearful avoidant. Much pulling and pushing until it ended by her pushing everything away. A year later she st…

Question to anxious/avoidant couples — I’m a dismissive avoidant in recovery I’ve been working on myself since October’23 I read a lot of self help books, went to therapy, watched youtube videos on attachment, listened to On Attachment,…

Anxiety only triggered in romantic relationship, how to manage it? — Hi everyone, I’m a 26M and fairly new to relationships. I’ve noticed my anxious attachment only really shows up in my romantic relationship, not with friends, family, or colleagues. With them I feel …

Feeling bad after dates? — I asked my friends for some advice regarding how to attempt to move my attachment style in a more secure direction, and one of them said that for them, going out on dates really helped them, especiall…

Thank you — I'm in one of the healthiest relationships I've ever been in, and this subreddit—along with my therapist—has helped me in a big way. I still get triggered, but I'm better at self-soothing and have lea…

I had a breakthrough tonight! — Hello! Brief backstory here. I recently got divorced, and dating has been an interesting experience since. I went into one relationship very quickly with another anxiously attached person. It didn't w…

Overcoming my anxious attachment — Hi I've successfully combated my attachment style and offer some of the resources I've found. I've dealt with anxiety and insecurity across my romantic and platonic relationships throughout my life. …

How to fully be present in my dating break (build momentum at the start)? — You'd think taking a break would be straight forward, but I feel like it's more challenge for us anxious attachment/pure-O OCD types who struggle with rumination or feelings of inadequacy about their …

I don't want to cry all day and feel lonely anymore. I don't want to fear abandonment anymore. I want to improve myself. — In 12th grade I became very close to a classmate of mine. Both of us bonded over shared trauma and basically became inseparable. We texted each other 24/7 and became very VERY affectionate which then …

Success Story: FA/Disorganized Attachment Healing Roadmap, Resource Recommendations — **Hello, fellow Fearful Avoidants! The below post has grown out of almost 3 years of research and healing this attachment style, which in my case was coupled with Relationship OCD (ROCD). ROCD is a vi…

What are good books or podcasts to consume if I’m early in a great relationship and trying not to let me anxiety ruin it? — I’ve been dating a really amazing and supportive partner for the last few months. I thought I had done the work to heal my anxious attachment style, but I’m quickly learning there is a lot more work …

Need advice: Is it possible to be anxious anxiously attached to a specific person? — Good evening everyone! I am 25 M Recently, things ended pretty badly with this woman I was close to with. She was aware I had feelings for her, and well would flirt back sometimes. I was and still am…

Unsent letter to a prior ex, in the midst of a current breakup. — I am in a crash course on my own nervous system while in the midst of a breakup with a dismissive avoidant man I've loved for almost five years. I'd known about the anxious-avoidant trap for some time…

I earned secure attachment in 4 months... — I can't believe I'm writing this. I did this without dating a secure person and without spending money on courses/apps. I promise I'm not selling anything. Big disclaimers: * I am only mostly secure…

First Time Serious Connection With an Avoidant — I was in a relationship with an avoidant for around 3 months and everything was going well and we weren't moving too fast in my opinion. We had gone on dates and met each other's families. They had be…

chronic depressed and sad — I have been suffering from chronic depression for many years. Despite many attempts, it still persists and has become part of who I am. Sometimes, I have been able to cope with it. I used medication f…

Master’s degree, big scholarship, and leaving a toxic situation — Background: I was keen to leave my toxic family situation for years but let’s just say it wasn’t happening. I got a good job in my hometown, I found someone I loved who was desperate to marry me, I …

avoidants that have worked on yourself,what helped you become secure? — I’m a DA in recovery I have attachment and codependency issues I don’t want to attract anyone with anxious attachment (I had a really good/mindfuck relationship with someone with anxious attachme…

For those hurting, advice for your 2026 and my story — Hello everyone, **Preface** I am an anxious attacher, so my experience by-and-large is with dismissive avoidants and fearful avoidants. It is not my intent to villainize these attachment styles; thi…

FA breakup & prolonged limbo - does avoidance calcify over time or can it still reverse? — I’m hoping to hear from people who’ve been through something similar, FAs, or anyone who has opinions on this. I was in a 2 year relationship with someone I later realized is fearful avoidant (I didn…

Anxious Attachment Help — I'm a 44 M and feel like an emotionally secure relationship is impossible. What's helped you heal? I feel like everything in my life has been taken from me and have a difficult time finding motivation…

What qualities to look for in a therapist — Previously, I had been working with a somatic therapist for 6 years (on trauma healing, not specifically attachment related) and a few months ago they closed their practice for personal reasons on *ve…

Trading book recommendation! For those trying to fix attachment issues. — “Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents” -by Lindsay C. Gibson, PHD This book helped me realize that, at my core, I struggle with dating and attachment because it’s hard for me to comprehend …

What is my core wound when I don't worry what others think about me, I'm not afraid of being alone, but still no boundaries with closest people — I want to heal my wounds and spot and correct the false truths that I have about myself and others, but I'm finding it quite difficult. It is because it seems to me that I lack some essential traits o…

The book 'It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken' really helped put things in perspective.

This is a great read, thank you for the effort put into it. As someone who sort of knew they were emotionally neglected but never really understood it was a real thing before I discovered this sub, t…

Glad it helped you in some way. I’ve felt like a whiny little wimp for getting PTSD from something that I saw as not a true threat to life. Babies and children absolutely register lack of affection…

Haha what an honour to be compared to Uncle Iroh! 😆 yes I understand and I debated whether to put that in, however there are some people who get frustrated with their attempts and prayer can actually…

thank you!! this helped a lot

a) law of assumption, not law of belief. And where did you get the other descriptions from? I've been on Neville sub for a while, literally noone describes the law in those words or speak in a spiritu…

Stop stalking their socials too. Mute on instagram. It pushes their stories and their posts to the end of your feed so unless you’re following 2 people, you should never see anything from them. Muting…

I love my ex but we were so toxic together and our breakup did wonders in showing me how horrible our relationship was and just how much work I have to do on myself. My hope is maybe… in the future we…

This music helped me astral project https://youtu.be/lnNJT7dfT0Q

Because thats not how relationships work. You can’t solely be thinking of whats best for you. If I date someone yet kept myself before them all the time, that relationship would probably not last very…

Hi I started with JM and I was convinced to switch to NG Then I was guided back to POSM I can say that some techniques of NG helped But most of all, POSM seems clearer than ever after my detour in…

You are farther along in your divorce process than I am! I’m still in the ‘I’ve been invited to stay in our house, but sleep in the other bedroom’ phase. I haven’t seen an attorney yet. Have you gotte…

Oof. I feel that... I think what's worse is I know I *could* have, and it would have helped save my marriage. But to do it now, without the support of the one person I thought I could rely on to help…

Something my therapist said to me yesterday: closure in these situations has to come from within you, since the other person has opted to disconnect. I chose to write a letter to my STBX before our …

Hi! So one thing I can tell you from lots of therapy and recently spending time around her is I realized I had been only remembering her good qualities and putting her on a pedestal in my mind. When w…

So I just wrote a comment today on another post that might help too: You’re being too hard on yourself. Your divorce is completely fresh and you need to give yourself grace and allow yourself to feel…

I'm glad to hear it helped! You're welcome lol. I found it really weird that nobody on this sub was talking about that book at all. (At least back then.) It seems to have basically everything you coul…

Omg I relate SO much to what you are saying. When my ex's affair was discovered he was remarkably cruel to me. He wasn't sure he wanted to continue in our marriage and refused to cut things off with h…

If that's how you want to look at it. I quit smoking this year after 15 years. It took constant "affirming" in my mind that I was no longer a smoker. Same with losing a ton of weight. I decided I was …

Love these arguments. Point 1: There is a difference between hypnosis (true authentic feelings of experience of here and now of the desired outcome) and daydreaming. When you give your mind and your…

Omg twins. Hi! Yeah I hadn’t been in a romantic relationship at all for six years before I finally tried with this FA guy. In my last real relationship I was targeted by a psychopath and it fucked me …

I read all the books I could, but the only thing that truly helped was a great therapist. It helped me put what I read into something actionable.

If you want to talk, I invite DMs but I'm only here sporadically. I'm a healed avoidant. I say that, but it's not black and white. I measure now for mostly secure. I still experience the initial resp…

Yes, that's precisely my message! And that's why I started treating myself for my issues so aggressively since my late teens (now mid/late 20s). I didn't want to keep passing on the cycle, and this go…

I actually have my doubts that therapy is ***the*** key for most avoidants, myself. I've been in and out of therapy at different points since I was thirteen, and *yes* it has helped with different thi…

I listened to “attached” on audio book, it was great. What really helped was learning what “activating” and “deactivating” strategies were. I often used a lot of activating strategies, so now that I’m…

I'm so glad it has helped you! It really helped me too! :)

Completely agree with you that it's a common topic, just haven't seen it discussed much on these forums, so thought I'd try to impart what'd helped me in the hope it helps someone else! Relationships…

I think I have the opposite issue? I can’t form an attachment to any therapist no matter what. I always want to retreat and it feels like I’m sending myself toward a trap each session, the closer I ge…

It helped me to cut out some toxic family members. One of the elements that fed my anxious attachment was that I had low self esteem. I worked really hard to build that up, but it was difficult to m…

Hope they help! Im a week out of being broken up with and they have helped so much ♥️

Hi there, i know it's only been a day, but are there any updates? Reading this, i feel a pit in my stomach for you and hope that he's just busy. It's almost like getting the news that someone you love…

Pretty sure I was an FA (schizophrenic dad, sadistic mom who wanted to abort me—I took care of the family’s emotional needs, disregarded my own). I was still confused/hurting 2+ years post no contact…

Oh believe me, I spend a lot of time talking to them. They only answer rarely. My latest thing is to take each part and work to understand wehre it's coming from, what it's movtivations are, how it …

Well, I could read several books on attachment theory and the words made sense but I couldn’t put it into practice. I was an Anxious Preoccupied and reading about how I had a fear of failure, rejectio…

My secure attachment style hasn't been enough to save me from the anxiety of meeting guys via dating apps since I had near-assaults with the last 3 I met (one picked me up and didn't put me down again…

Thank you for your sympathy! 💕 I reported them on the app, but didn't feel comfortable going to the police since similar behavior hasn't been consistently regarded as assault in other cases. My expe…

It's actually not uncommon for stalkers to follow their targets when they move. It's advised to stay/move near support systems. This all happened to me 20 years ago and I did 13 years of therapy, whic…

I’ve been deep into building marketing systems lately, and one thing that really helped me was creating a set of AI prompts to make launch planning, SEO prep, digital marketing , dev and code way too …

I hated making a plan for years and writing all the little things down. But that's what helped me. I know it's cliche. But writing to-do lists helps a lot. I have a Trello with weekdays, monthly plans…

Learning about change management helped me a lot in applying DevOps transformation. Check out this post about J-Curve and Agile change management: https://tech.aabouzaid.com/2019/05/devops-and-chang…

This is super impressive! I relate to that frustration with fragmented UK property data soooo much. I'm actually working on automating my own property investing workflow (tho not nearly as sophisticat…

Oh man, I feel this post in my bones! As someone with ADHD who built a whole business helping other ADHD entrepreneurs (Scattermind), I can tell you you're definitely not alone. The "100 ideas but ca…

I work with a small team building niche games focused on roleplay and social interaction. The real key has been understanding what players enjoy, updating frequently, and monetizing through game passe…

Reaching $300k in profit usually doesn’t happen overnight, but here's how I got there: I started with a side hustle while working full-time. Having a steady paycheck allowed me to take risks without …

Have you thought about seeing if there’s something that’s interesting for them that they could put that energy into? I know when I’ve been burnt out getting an opportunity to do something fresh and in…

Totally get where you’re coming from, I’ve worked with someone teaching people how to land local business clients by offering done-for-you sites + recurring services (but using GoHighLevel instead of …

For me, it’s been about building a personal brand and a company brand as two distinct things. They’re obviously connected with shared values and vision, but they serve different purposes My personal …

Man, this post hits SO hard. Running a business is absolutely brutal, and I think we need more honesty about the real toll it takes on founders. I've gone through some of these exact same experiences…

This is super impressive! I relate to that frustration with fragmented UK property data soooo much. I'm actually working on automating my own property investing workflow (tho not nearly as sophisticat…