book
literature
Evidence
Citations (74)
Def suspect. Maybe you could try reading her some romance/erotic "literature" if she's down. Paying attn to her and adoring her. Seems like the marriage may have run its course to me. This is when the…
The successful are not here — After years of watching YouTube videos about startup / founder stuff and reading blogs, Reddit, and the horrible place that is LinkedIn, I came to realize that 99.9% of advice (especially in the SaaS …
I (re)earned my secure attachment this week. What a journey this has been. — I just wanted to share this diary dump with anyone who wants a success story. I believed myself to be FA/A for a long time, and this week I can finally call myself secure. TW: sexual assualt Despite …
Update: Self-help group for anxious attachment — Thank you to everyone who responded to my [**prior post**](https://www.reddit.com/r/AnxiousAttachment/comments/1plm1g1/selfhelp_group_for_anxious_attachment/) re starting a self-help group. (Yes, The…
Is casual sex compatible with secure attachment? — I feel like I have a solid grasp of attachment theory after reading a fair amount of the literature over the years, but there’s a philosophical question I can’t quite resolve. Can someone who is secu…
I finally realized my fear of closeness is really a fear of being known — I've been working to understand myself better as a DA, in part with the help of Reddit. I now feel the last puzzle pieces fell into place and I finally have a coherent story of why I am the way I am. …
my(F28) bf(M30) thinks themed bridal shower of my friend is stupid and my costume is stupid. — I (F28) am a teacher and my boyfriend(M30) works for a company. we have been together for 4 years and are highly compatible. He has always been reserved and quiet and introvert by nature. i'm more of …
Getting rid of nihilism/pessimism — I (24M) am a pessimistic person, it is a really bad thing and i'm struggling to get rid of this thing. A lot of things happened these last years that chopped my illusions about life, such as losing my…
‘Bing’s Cherries’ rewrites the American tall tale through Oregon grower’s life — “Bing’s Cherries,” written and illustrated by Taiwanese American authors Livia Blackburne and Julia Kuo, is set for publication on March 10. **If you grew up in the United States, chances are the fol…
I'm buying books but not actually reading any of them. How do I actually enjoy sitting down and reading a piece of literature? — I want to be more well read. I love the thought of reading all classic books and authors that people talk about. Dostoyevsky, Joyce, Kafka, Melville just to name a few. Everyone rants and raves about …
Potentially unpopular opinion re: Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents — Just finished “Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents” by Lindsay Gibson after seeing several recommendations for it on subreddits like these. I thought the book had some good info, and I’ll a…
Farewell — In the last two years, I have posted to this group a few times. Last year, I posted ([“Here’s the thing: you’re dying, too.”](https://www.reddit.com/r/Stoicism/comments/1ifz1cr/heres_the_thing_youre_…
A LOB analysis of an experience I had at 17; and some encouragement — # Long post, probably worth it to read: There was one certain manifestation (I don't say LOB yet on purpose, you'll know why) of mine when I was 17 which always gave me goosebumps at the time too, an…
How instilling pride in their cultural heritage helps Asian American men flourish — **Asian American men have long been marginalized by dominant white masculine ideals that portray them as outsiders, effeminate and inferior.** These negative stereotypes, perpetuated through the me…
How instilling pride in their cultural heritage helps Asian American men flourish — **Asian American men have long been marginalized by dominant white masculine ideals that portray them as outsiders, effeminate and inferior.** These negative stereotypes, perpetuated through the medi…
16M mental health declining — I think that really, there are around 4-5 things I can think of that contribute to my mental health declining,mostly rooted in isolation, so this might drone on. Firstly, in the about year & a half i…
Mindfulness Survey (Anyone 18+, 10–15 min) — Hello! I’m a faculty member at Duquesne University conducting an academic research study on how mindfulness is practiced and experienced in everyday life. The goal of this research is to better …
Bhrumadhya meditation - 17 days Progress Report: Transitioning to Dual-Core Awareness (Mental Anchor + Thought Observation) — TL;DR: Moved from a single-focus "spotlight" to a partitioned awareness. I can now hold a stable mental coordinate at the brow while simultaneously observing background thoughts without "system hijack…
I cheated and want to change — Hey, just going to be blunt. I was actively cheating on my girlfriend, honestly the literal best and most perfect person in my life…multiple times with the same person. Long story short, they both fou…
Do you ever check the original? — As somebody coming from classical languages and literature, I’ve been wondering about how much people here like to look up the original phrasing or wording and try to understand it. A sentence from …
23F &23M dont know how to naturally have a formal and healthy relationship? — **Clarification:** Just for obeying the rules, I added 23M. I’m actually 23F and not in any relationship. I’m a postgraduate student, and I have never had a formal relationship. I’ve only experienc…
Advice on going no contact with narc family? — Hey all! I come from a narcissistic family system. I luckily do not live with them but I do sometimes rely on their help with things during emergencies. I also have some moderate disabilities so there…
How do I (31M) convince my (29F) that her reading is unhealthy for us? — I'll preface this by saying this has been by far the best relationship I've been in so far in my life. Communication, intimacy, shared goals, connection, everything has been perfect. We have had one h…
FAQ on emotional neglect - For anyone new to the subreddit or looking to better understand the fundamentals — **What is emotional neglect?** In one's childhood, a lack of: everyday caring, non-intrusive and engaged curiosity from parents (or whoever your primary caregivers were, if not your biological parent…
The only thing I would really recommend is learning about internal family systems. That kind of work *can* be done on its own but I did the majority of mine with a therapist. The book “No Bad Parts” b…
Well, where do I start? I guess for me the foundation was based on 3 pillars. 1st was of course Mindfulness as ability to comprehend that neither thoughts or feelings are our true self, which is in fa…
Avoidants are demonized because they don’t communicate and often deny their (ex)partner the ability to communicate and that is dehumanizing becuase communication is what separates us from the rest of …
For me it was essentially a ptsd flashback and they “were” the person hurting me if this was taking place. Like I was trying to control the damage that I believed (rationally or not) was coming. So a …
Text of original post by u/TheOceanTheSun: Thank you to everyone who responded to my [**prior post**](https://www.reddit.com/r/AnxiousAttachment/comments/1plm1g1/selfhelp_group_for_anxious_attachment/…
I think the problem is not *how* you reassure her, it's that: * As a person with chronic pain with periods of flare-ups/exhaustion + being more introverted in general, your friend's anxious attachmen…
This is extremely relatable for me too. I'm actually just learning about attachment theory now at 36, and reading about all the thoughts and behaviours and feelings common to anxious attachment style …
Yep, jazz, literature, cooking—so much of what’s great in life is about how we newly recontextualize foundational stuff. Love the analogy!
I'm worried for you because of how you're handling it. I don't see this going well. It's sad because he's being a lot more direct than I expected and it feels like a missed opportunity to have healthy…
Perhaps it's disingenuous to pretend to like feminist literature to score a date, but that seems a bit silly to apply to dancing. You never know if you might genuinely like it! And even if you don't, …
Thanks for your response! That matches my experience. I found it surprisingly easy to change my behavior around. In fact, the hard part was getting to the point where I saw my behavior was a problem i…
Wow. Really interesting to read this, especially about you and your wife coming to realizations and conclusions together. Thank you for sharing. Do you have any books, literature to recommend? Or did…
I didn't do any therapy, but I discussed my situation a lot on Reddit and answered many questions about my experience as a DA, which helped me a great deal in terms of understanding myself. My discuss…
I'm 57F and only realized the extent of my childhood emotional neglect following a complete breakdown a few years ago. Like you I have a devoted husband. Our kids love us in a way I find hard to compr…
It’s not easy and it’s not as simple as reading a book and expecting to be “fixed”. It takes time and a lot of practice. A lot of failure and reflecting and trying again. Journaling can really help to…
The reason most psychologists and several literature on coverts advise against exposing them is because their goal is de-escalation and I understand why. Narcissists don't just want to control you the…
Tbh I've been seeking for as long as I can remember but never read much literature. I ordered both books. What's so special about them?
Hold on, let's back up here. Yes, the previous comment saying exposure should be done as a hierarchy is generally correct for patient comfort. But the idea that flooding either leads to just feeling s…
Be relieved. Humans are not typically able to separate feelings and sexual activity over long durations of time for complex evolutionary reasons. So congratulations, your totally human reaction means …
Omg I remember this person. Basically every post she made was just promoting her own self-published novel (which btw, seemed like another rote "asian american literature" semi-autobiographical drivel …
I wonder if your major is literature haha as I feel like I’m in English Comp 100 right now 😆
I read his first book, Voyages into the Unknown, which is a great book, with a useful technique for anyone to help deceased people (maybe we see something bad on the news and we want to be of help... …
Don’t forget this sub has a library with access to all manner of Stoic literature. I like to use it because a lot of times a translation just won’t make sense or ring true but a quick check of a diffe…
it really sucks because most couples come together and they cuddle or embrace or just reinforce that they love eachother and no one is going anywhere. to me that is not intuitive, i withdraw. and even…
Read up on the literature, ask any AI or lookup glutamine vs. gut inflammation, which is always usually what’s occurring. im addressing leaky gut inflammation. Then electrolytes to help get PH levels …
Oh hey look. DARVO. Front and center. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DARVO](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DARVO) Interesting how you not only hit all the keynotes you missed the entire point of the …
Try something in the world, get feedback on how well or not well it went. Go back to the text to make sure you read it right, consult some secondary literature, whether asking here or looking up a Gre…
I don't know if generational trauma is at an all time high or if people are more open to talk about it or become aware of it due to the internet. The concept of trauma and bad parents goes back pretty…
>No doubt, passing knowledge down generations is immensely important. But I'm not convinced we're doing that any more. You have shoe-horned "and technology" into this sentence - quite literally, the g…
Ok, show us the literature that recommends therapists immediately recommend clients to lawyer up and divorce? I suspect you can't because you just pulled this out of your ass and are speaking from you…
No shame in listening to audio books. Librivox is a website with lots of great literature for free. All books in public domain and read by everyday people. I’ve found that Robert Lewis Stevenson (tr…
This is basically what I was coming to say, as well. Classics are actually often and mostly challenging, largely because you have to bring a fair amount of the interest in them oneself. Once you fill…
>His response was along the lines of sex books include one partner, you’re technically reading about cheating, this is whoreish… your guy is intimidated by a book, by some literature. That just sound…
Have you read much of the classic Stoic literature? If not, it may be worth starting there - Epictetus certainly explains it better than I do :)
No I'm not read up on all the essential stoic literature unfortunately. I took some of the main concepts (really dug into the virtue piece) and applied that to help in my personal development. It's be…
The literature says they don’t. Don’t forget they know exactly what they’re doing. Guaranteed. And they won’t change either.
read the literature and go ask your favorite child psychologist. Enough said.
Ironically, at least in my experience as a Chinese American, there's been plenty of the opposite, like "positivity". "Ooooh Asians are smart, Asians are successful, be proud to be Asian, be proud to b…
I don’t know how Asian American woman literature is forever not beating the allegations for this type of thing! I really want to know if this type story is that compelling to you guys?
There just seems to be a lot of asian american literature and media specifically about their relationship with a white guy or white guys. The book is still about this asian character's relationship wi…
There are plenty of great asian american women writers. It's just that there's some Asian diaspora literature and media that treads the same grounds over and over again, and it doesn't give asians a g…
For everyone that's saying not to be too quick to judge this work: I would tend to agree that some people here are flaunting that they're literally judging a book by its cover and that's not a good ha…
I assume these authors think dating a white boy is somehow subversive or unique or something. That would presumably be the reason why they'd put in as the title of their work with double exclamation m…
>We do not have to talk about the few cases of men being victimized According to [the paper](https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10135558/) I linked earlier, "27% of men and over 32% of women ha…
It's more a question of context than being smart. You kind of have to understand how ancient people thought, at least a little bit, in order go get the gist of what they're saying. The core concepts t…
Sure, but what you're saying doesn't necessarily mean it breaks away from the tropes. The "Asian American literature" meme isn't just about whether the author ends up with a white guy. If the book sti…
I was taught by my spirit guides, so I'm not sure on what literature is out there. I'll tell you how I do it though, I'm not one to gatekeep useful information such as this. I tend to do this whil…
Sun and Mercury are conjunct and sextile Mars. The Sun and Mercury may make you talkative, creative, lots of communication, thoughts and ideas going on. Could have ADHD. Sextile Mars lends confidenc…
>I also want to address the idea of anxious people being seen as “roles.” I understand this may come from your personal experience, but not every anxiously attached person relates to others in that wa…
you say it's goofy as hell but would you say it's goofy when black people perpetually attack and criticize black men who put white women on a pedestal to the point that they make it the entire plot of…