destroyed

I am trapped in a cycle of trauma, fawning, and complete emotional dependency: How do I survive when my past won't let me breathe? — **TL;DR:** I survived a horrific childhood witnessing my mother’s repeated sexual assault and suffered years of severe bullying. Today, I’m struggling with AuDHD, Bipolar, BPD, and what I suspect is s…

Rejected in the final interview after a month long process — This is honestly just a rant post, because I feel completely deflated at this point. I’ve been actively looking for a job for over a year now, moved to Spain three months ago to start a new life, and…

Anyone Else Feel Relationships just Aren't for them? — Hello all, I'm basically pretty severely A.P. , & so far I've been unable to get close to anyone (romantically) in my life without just exploding with terror that I'll be abandoned (or feeling a stro…

I (re)earned my secure attachment this week. What a journey this has been. — I just wanted to share this diary dump with anyone who wants a success story. I believed myself to be FA/A for a long time, and this week I can finally call myself secure. TW: sexual assualt Despite …

Tired of my own inability to connect — I try my best, but even my best really isn’t that much connection. Sometimes I wonder if my childhood and young adult experiences permanently destroyed my ability make attachments at all, let alone h…

Divorce isn’t all it’s cracked up to be — I miss coming home and kissing my wife. I miss coming up behind her and hugging her, kissing her neck, caressing her breasts. I miss her laying beside me in bed at night. I miss the conversations bef…

When a tiny moment shows you the practice is paying off — I spilled my coffee all over the kitchen counter rght when I was about to leave the house. That kind of thing used to piss me off big time.. I’d rush to clean it up, cussing, mumbling under my breath,…

No contact year 6 update: — Hello everyone! I’ve made some update posts in the past and figured I would make one for year 6 as that anniversary is coming up soon, and with context it will make sense why I still specifically reme…

My (18F) girlfriend told me she is taking 5 days to think over if we should break up. What should I (19M) do? — TL;DR my girlfriend has reached a breaking point and told me she’ll consider being together but as of now we aren’t. Me and my girlfriend have been together for nearly 2 years and met our senior year…

Cheated on after 10.5 years together, divorced at 11 years together. — Hi Everyone, This is half venting and half hoping for advice or people to listen. I'm at a low point right now so I thought reaching out to a community might be beneficial as opposed to holding it…

Heart chakra help — Hello all, I hope everyone is well. I am suffering from a closed heart chakra, I consciously think I am good there but I am not. I hold pain there. It began in 2023, I got a snippet of some trauma i…

My cop husband cheated and now I can't trust him when he leaves for night shift. — My husband became a cop in 2024 and our entire relationship changed. We've been together since 2019 and we have three kids. Before this, I truly believed he was loyal and strong. He always told me he…

Can you still think of your WS as a ‘good person’? — I was having a random conversation with my WH today about something… and he said, “Well, I’m a good person, so I could never do that…” I was quiet for a beat, but eventually agreed with him… though I…

18 months after my husband’s affair and the “ick” just hit. Has anyone ever gotten attraction back after this? — About 18 months ago I discovered my husband had been having an 3 year long emotional affair with a coworker that he admits he was actively pursuing. We decided to try to reconcile. To his credit, he …

After 30 years of being a people pleasing, peace-keeping, manipulative, caretaking, dysregulated, codependency "addict," I've finally reached a point where I have enough control to simply STOP. In a very short amount of time, my whole entire life has changed. It's nearly impossible to describe. — The first part of this post is just context, and you can skip it all by scrolling down to **The Proof** I'm not going to go into much detail, but just for context: I experienced some pretty major chi…

Started family therapy with my parents... — My partner and I have a child together. My parents want to spend time with their grandchild, but I seem to regularly get in fights with my mom. She got angry with my partner for a comment he made, and…

Decided to stop blaming things on my breakup, the world, and my mental health — Ever since my break up last year i’ve turned to alcohol, gambling, lots of random hookups with girls i would never make my wife. I’ve come to realize that she was one of the most important lessons in …

Pulling the trigger but terrified, Male 48 — I'm a male, 48 years old. Married for 24 years to a woman two years older than me. I'm sure my story isn't unique, but here it is anyway. On the outside, we look like a great couple. We have a teena…

I am so done with narcissistic people — I just can’t deal with that anymore. For me it all started with a narc father. As an adult, i have dated three people with npd/bpd or strong traits I and just can’t take that emotional and physical ab…

Husband left for reasons I won’t know — My husband (29) just up and left me (F 29) yesterday. I tried to talk it through with him but he got up at 3am said he was done and he can’t do this anymore and there’s no changing his mind. I’m compl…

New to CE5s Should I be concerned? — Hi everyone. I’m new to the CE5 community, though I’ve seen orbs throughout my life. For years, I’ve followed Dr. Steven Greer’s work, believing that advanced intelligence must be peaceful or they wou…

Robert Monroe — I was listening to a video of Robert Monroe yesterday and these are his exact words: Knowledge to me doesn't even have to be a belief but a consideration of yours, and that is that - that more than …

I did it again. — I reached out and destroyed any dignity I had left, they were nice enough not to laugh at me to my face atleast. I’m a failure as a partner, friend and I’m not even good enough to be a useful tool.

If you’re going through a breakup read this. — I went through a breakup about 9 months ago that honestly could’ve destroyed me. She moved on fast, I felt disrespected, and for a while I genuinely felt like I was alone in it. Even the people close…

She admits the lies and secrecy, but still denies anything physical — I’m posting because I feel like I’m losing my grip on what is real, and I need perspective from people who understand trickle truth, repeated minimizing, and what it feels like when someone admits jus…

Does fixing the chakras lead to physical healing? — Hi everyone. I was wondering if fixing the chakras could correct physical abnormalities / health issues. In my case, I got scoliosis ie abnormal curvature of my spine. It kinda destroyed my life, took…

My ex destroyed his life after we broke up — I don’t even know why I’m writing this, but everything has escalated so much that I just need to get this off my chest. I (33F) was in a relationship for more than 14 years with my ex, let’s call him…

After 9 years together she cheated, moved on fast, and dropped the bomb during 'final goodbye' – advice needed to survive this — Hello Reddit, new user here using a throwaway account. I've heard this community gives solid advice, so I'm finally posting. My ex-girlfriend and I were together for 9 years. We broke up in May 2025 …

16 years together feels destroyed... — 7 months ago I (M, 35) found out my partner (F, 35) of 16 years was messaging another man she had met intermittently at her work in a professional capacity (she no longer worked there when I had disco…

I think my friend is leaving me and it's destroying me — I have been knowing this friend for around a year or so. We bonded very quickly, opened up about our pasts, shared a lot and quickly became great friends. We used to chat all the time (pretty much lit…

My ex broke up with me 4 months ago. I sent a message breaking no contact. Her response destroyed me. — International relationship — she's Brazilian, I'm Arab. We truly loved each other, but the distance, cultural differences, and wanting different things ended it all. It was the right decision, but the…

Just trying to gain closure on my own... — This is something I wrote in my journal, trying to process emotions and gain closure. Lori, Since you would not give me the opportunity for closure, I'm going to do what I can to get it here. This…

The fatalistic overcorrection of the dichotomy of control. — I wrote part of the body of this post as a comment in another thread, but I see these comments very often anyway so I thought (voluntarily) that I would give a general objection to them here. The g…

Approaching 7 Months Later - Its Almost Over — I got married on August 4th 2025 and on the morning of September 1st 2025 I saw my wife sexting some dude she met on a game. Since then she has signed a separation agreement with me that my lawyer wro…

Can You Change a Toxic Relationship? - Is this the right place to post this? — Hello, I am a long-time lurker of this sub first time poster. I’m not sure how to even start this post all I can say is I am completely at a loss. I am so afraid to be alone. Actually, I am horrified.…

Not sure how to make friends after my mom destroyed any attempts I made growing up — I just remembered this as I woke up and checked my phone and there were no messages or anything. My mom was completely emotionally immature and unavailable and I turned to boys for attention. This got…

I have wasted my potential and success — Hello, I'm from an Asian country, and I'm 27 years old. I studied English language and teaching for 5 years. After I graduated I worked for 1.5 years. I did not work for 2 years, and I stayed at famil…

Wasted my years and potential success — Hello, I'm from an Asian country, and I'm 27 years old. I studied English language and teaching for 5 years. After I graduated I worked for 1.5 years. I did not work for 2 years, and I stayed at famil…

I miss my ex so much it’s killing me — I don’t understand how someone can be so good when they’re good, but so damn cruel when they’re not. She was my first love. Before her, I don’t think I had ever really felt it. She showed me what it …

One sentence he said which broke me…. — Long story short he had an affair i found out, we had been together 20 years 3 kids a very turbulent relationship but we stood by each other. We finished and he has stayed with mistress. He said t…

How to process this weird break of no contact? — ​ My ex avoidantly discarded with seemingly minimal thought, which absolutely destroyed me. She then anxiously broke no contact after 2 hours in an anxious spiral thinking I mightn't have gott…

Unknown amount of fresh mushrooms — I had a grow bag that was failing pretty badly… the pins quickly turned to aborts and the mycelium started to pigment badly. I figured “fuck if I might as well harvest what I can and hope for the be…

Letter to Self before Meeting her — Figured it helped a few on other subs so I would add here. I've also been told to warn it may be a trigger to some. Hey dumbass, I don’t really know how to start this without it feeling unreal, beca…

Have I 22F have destroyed my boyfriend 24M and I's sex life? — EDIT: I was not expecting to receive this many comments and am sorry for the lack of response. I’ve been very busy with work the last 12 hours and will try my best to respond as soon as possible. (I…

I did it.. — I blocked him. Everywhere. No doors left open. Because I can't take it anymore. I'm in love with someone who could not give the slightest shred of a fuck less about me. Somebody that destroyed me em…

Feeling lost, depressed, and lonely. — It’s been almost 5 weeks since my husband of almost 16 years blindsighted me and told me he’s done and leaving me. We have 3 kids and a perfect life, or so I thought. We just built our dream/forever h…

My (M27) Best friend since High School (F26) told me she cheated after we got engaged — I (M27) have been together with my fiance(F26) or the last 6 years… I have known her for 13+ since middle school, since I was a kid and ever since High school we were best friends. We did not start d…

Went on my first date in 16 years and I have ALOT of questions! — so I met this very beautiful woman on Facebook dating. something that I have not taken too serious in the past. I have to say, the attention and validation feelt nice. Especially after escaping an emo…

Life has broken me: depression, bad health, shitty jobs, and an emptiness that even therapy can’t fix — Hey, I was in treatment for severe depression and it turned out a lot of it was actually untreated attention/concentration disorder. With the meds I’m more stable now — my brain only works when you f…

I need help with a sensitive conversation of the NSFW variety (late 20F) (mid 30M) — I (late 20F) need some advice on how to have a sensitive conversation with a man (mid 30M) that I've been seeing consistently for about 2 months. It's about sex, and I know that this is a "just talk t…

How many of you have been abused by psychiatry? — Basically the title. I've been abused, harmed, tortured by psychiatry for 10 years. Imagine hitting your most lowest, most broken point after decadds of abuse, only to have this institition abuse and …

PLEASE READ IF YOUR LOOKING INTO ASTRAL PROJECTING. About 2 months ago I was looking extremely deep into astral projecting, once I seen what it was I was instantly drawn to it and thought it was inter…

If you have ever had to watch a secure friend get destroyed by someone with Anxious attachment it is awful. Sometimes healthy people get tired of being smothered and decide to end a relationship. An…

I'm in the real estate space and I'm in the process of building a shop space for a few independent contractors to run their own businesses out of, and it has taken over a year and is 80% over budget, …

So the FA I dated for over 3 years sent me an almost identical message like clockwork everytime he would discard me(usually took 1-2 months after no contact) I didn’t know what attachment styles were,…

just be alone. I am fa and I've destroyed everybody who was sane before me. I am going to choose to be alone forever

I'm the same but also with the avoidant tendencies. So i pull away dramatically for what looks like no reason. I spiral, I get in my head, I misread signs, I misunderstand, im shit at boundaries, I …

Sounds like classic deactivation. I legit said the words "feel like a fraud" to my partner during my recent, massive deactivation which may have actually destroyed the relationship. If it's salvageab…

I think if you find yourself needing to break up to get him to fight for you then it's a clear sign of an anxious spiral. In my earlier years I used to use unconsciously manipulative protests to feel …

Wow. Thank you for sharing, I am a DA and my ex was an FA and this exact same scenario happened to me. Utterly destroyed me for months, 3 months out and the triangulation/monkey branching/public humil…

Well she was doing it in secret, but the guy she started dating - months before we broke up, talked to one of his female friends, who talked to one of my female friends, who is a gossip, who talked to…

I completely understand this feeling, and I destroyed a couple of good relationships because of my anxious attachment. I battled anxious attachment for years and went to so many therapists. There are …

That's a lot. Getting a list with all the things someone doesn't like about you is already really hard to swallow, even harder when it's given by a person you loved and trusted very dearly. Not only d…

Yeah potentially. I've also dated a DA and our relationship was way more stable though and he definitely showed empathy so I wouldn't say NPD light was with him although he could be quite cold and sel…

I recently became single due to my anxious attachment which I was aware of but didn't understand how unhealed I was. I was in a relationship since January and things took a turn around August which I…

Here's my thoughts after being on this subreddit for a while, and I am someone who has been daily practicing for the past 8+ months with no physical results. 1. Maladaptive daydreaming proves that ma…

I definitely get this feeling. When I was working 24 hour shifts it totally destroyed the relationship I was in because the guy felt like I wasn’t making him a priority during the shift. Some of those…

Reset the algo bro, I fell in the trap of reading the comments sections of those posts to see the drama and it's totally destroyed my feed 💀

Oh i crave the ramble, so no need to apologise. Yeah I can relate to so much of that, my new years resolution was to see my friends more. I think men have a habit of making their partner their main …

I understand completely with what your saying/feeling. I've been to quite a few singles events with nothing but hopes dashed, been on dating apps with hardly any matches and these things have really d…

I lost another friend today. It was my fault. They needed space, I couldn’t stop texting. Now it’s over. Limerance and anxious attachment has destroyed every meaningful relationship in my life. I’m …

I am sorry - the hurt will pass. Your self esteem would have been destroyed if you stayed with him. He sounds like a tone deaf fool 

Her lack of morals is appalling. Having sex in the office means that everyone knows exactly what she did. OPs reputation will be tarnished if it comes out that he is sleeping with her. The office inci…

One thing I’ve always struggled to workout is fixed/complete your life needs to be before you can start dating. I have some people tell me that everything else in your life needs to be hunky dory wh…

Sun sign activated like crazy. I began to do what i loved as a child again, became more outspoken and the introvert in me let loose a little and i started to make friends with my real personality and …

never actually connected with my sun sign (sag), but my stellium is in scorpio 3rd house, so that's probably why. when saturn returned, it destroyed what i believed in, making me see the truth behind …

Hey there, 14 years of my life have been like this, lots of darkness, amazing bad luck, very bad relationships and connections with people, I lost all my friends, I lost trust to the world, everythi…

I think wapo was more fair (or rather was, I do not read it since the trump 2024 bezos bullshit Reuters and APnews are high quality. Reuters specifically excels in foreign affairs For example, the…

There is a lot of finality in your list of three /4. To me, the biggest one is the mental health issues which is two of your bullets. These are quite serious and I have experience dating and marrying …

This is interesting to me because I have been working for some time on a structural model that actually uses very similar imagery of a wheel. When I read this account, what the person describes did no…

The rejection phobia is what’s tripping you up. (All that other stuff is just details.) It’s telling you a story right now that you may as well not even try, because you’re going to fail, and if you f…

As someone who was damn near destroyed my husband EA, do it beat yourself up over what ifs. If she says it don’t happens the you have to take her world for it in order to get some peace. I know it’s h…

Un my case they caused the pain by putting in 0 effort, lying, etc. i gave a million chances. Had to leave and feel destroyed

Perhaps the bull could be a representation of war. Maybe Egypt and the pyramids will be destroyed in the ever building conflicts were seeing unfold rn. The buffalo I saw was complete chill vibes, I w…

You cheated. He should leave you immediately. Loyalty and trust has been destroyed. Your marriage is over.

Dead bedroom is indeed a big problem. Not being able to get the physical attention that is important to her is a big problem. I would guess there is a lot more to that issue than she’s explaining fo…

We both used cannabis fairly often for many years, but until I started on about them I don't think they were ever something he gave much thought to. In the years previous he had the general idea of dr…

It's so shocking when you realize they knew what they were doing all along, it happened to me too for both parents, they think X and Y destroyed their lives so they have the right to destroy their chi…

broke up w my avoidant ex in Jan and it wasnt exactly clean and not on my own accord. That is the toughest part, not being able to move on entirely. While we had a talk eventually, it also comes with …

“She had been having an affair with my husband, for over a year.” Correction: *THEY* had/have been having an affair for over a year. Your husband **absolutely** knew what this woman was doing to you…

Our society has placed so much emphasis on this nebulous thing we call "happiness". Something that changes like the weather. A dream people chase. Meanwhile, as you have said, leaving a wake of destro…

So some contacts this is me coming from a place of having feelings for another person. And not acting on them. And actively resisting them. And still living knowing that there are things in my marria…

She deserves absolute waterfalls of shame for it. All of them do. I can remember piecing it together in middle school, when it occurred to me how often I heard that phrase at home and how she liked to…

Yep, same for nostalgic video games. I was obsessed with the Banjo-Kazooie games as a kid and sometimes I'll watch a TAS (Tool-Assisted Speedrun) video in the corner of my screen while I multi-task t…

I went through a divorce 2y ago and felt like that was the end for me, romantically speaking. Like my soulmate had just walked out on me, on us, not a care for what he destroyed ( he had an affair wit…

I've had so many of these things actually happen to me as well, so just know that ur not alone OP. I keep having flashbacks of my nmom saying certain things that destroyed me when I was younger or wha…

I've read some stuff on that sub but tbh I found it really difficult to read. It was a bit too close to it all because I'm still stuck not wanting to lose her even though she has done me so poorly. …

I found out in my early 50s that my stbxw had cheated multiple times throughout our marriage, culminating in a 2 year affair with my best friend. Just about destroyed me when that came out and blew th…

At the EOD it’s your life. As a man who has been married over 40 years, this betrayal isn’t fixable. The trust is gone and you will never get over this. It hasn’t hit you yet because you’ve yet to con…

I think this a lot too. I always thought it doesn't make sense, but really, it makes a whole lot of sense. It is a need to feel safe. And there just isn't a place like that, not really. Maybe it is no…

This just makes me doesn't want to date anymore, of all the cheating stories, break up stories that also involves in cheating, I've read on here, is like every 20 to about 25 posts the cheating spouse…