just friends

Trust your gut, even when your mind is unsure — Not exactly infidelity, but the same effect, I think. This is a bit long, apologies up front. I and my gf (both well past our 30s) started dating three years ago. We both had been married previousl…

I (re)earned my secure attachment this week. What a journey this has been. — I just wanted to share this diary dump with anyone who wants a success story. I believed myself to be FA/A for a long time, and this week I can finally call myself secure. TW: sexual assualt Despite …

Are pre-birthday discards the norm? — I’m trying to understand this through attachment theory because I genuinely don’t know what just happened. We’re both women. I was 23 with a grad degree, she was 38 and just got her culinary degree w…

6 month mark, can't progress further right now, but pausing feels shitty too. Leave? — In September, I cautiously decided to start seeing the father of my daughter's best friend. It's been really great, and has helped me work through a lot of emotional stuff including heavy grief. Aft…

I (32F) trusted my partner (34M) completely until I discovered he lied about a “friend” he talks to daily and that they were texting very appropriate. I’m shaking and feeling lost — I’m a 32F and my partner is 34M. We’ve known each other for many years and have a long history together. We were apart for a while in the past but recently decided to try again because we both felt th…

BF stayed in contact with an old hookup. Should I be worried? — Dating a wonderful man for almost two years. We both are divorced and were cheated on. So we’ve both come into this acknowledging that trust is hard for us but we’ve consistently communicated well. I …

I made my husband confess to OBS and here’s what happened — For your education and entertainment purposes, this is the story of what happened when I forced my husband to confess to OBS. Quick backstory: (you can read the full post on my profile) my husband h…

She cheated after 14 years — This is my first ever post on Reddit and it’s a long one so apologies in advance for any formatting errors. I have been with my fiancé for 14 years, we have been engaged for the last 4. Our relations…

I Changed Myself and Got it All — Hello, I’ve been wanting to write this post for a very long time. Grab a snack and come along for the ride! **The Beginning: April - October 2022** I discovered Neville 4 years ago; after a year of …

Accidentally became CODEPENDENT due to a kind GESTURE I had made for a friend — Past 4 months since maybe december, i let a dear friend of mine stay at my place. we would game and hang/watch movies and cook n stuff on the regular weekly. BUT... Since december, they stayed over…

No Contact is Hard — This is just a random post to say that every time I want to text him, I stop. Then I open up my notes app and type what I want to say, close it, and try to push past the urge. It seems to be working …

Do you ever get paranoid the narc will find your posts? — During the discard my nex said a number of times that he “doesn’t care or even think about me anymore”. He monkey branched to a new supply. I found her in his following on his social media and called …

Why does my relationship turn into a breakup every time we fight? — So I (24F) have been dating my boyfriend (26M) for about 4 months now. We met on Bumble, and honestly… I really do love him. He’s kind, thoughtful, and overall a really good person. But there’s this …

My fiancée just left me and I need help knowing where I went wrong… — My fiancée abruptly left me and then blocked me everywhere… I’m Allie (29F) and my ex fiancee is Kylie (32F). We were in a long distance relationship (she lives in France), but we would travel to see…

Getting a story about an ex from 20 years ago off my chest — TLDR: Had a weird break up. Reached out after 20 years. Got a response that made me feel bad. Learned a lesson about not trusting what people say during a break up, instead listen to what they do. I …

I broke up with my ex, but now I’m the one stuck and hurting — I have been with my ex for 7 years we were high-school sweet heart we started dating in 2017. we graduated high-school together nad college. we did everything together had got our first apartment. in…

Please help me. Please. — Relationship was going sensational for like 7-8 months, then we had a small fight and next day she went out with a boy. I had a huge crash and came back after a week. She had posted with another boy, …

I(19M) feel like I’ve lost my girlfriend(19F) even though we’re still together — TL;DR: I made mistakes early in the relationship (past flirting, not being fully transparent), which broke my girlfriend’s trust. Since then she’s become distant, says she lost feelings, and gives unc…

I Guess We’re Just Friends Now — I never wanted this. But sometimes it’s not about what you want, it’s about accepting what you get. You kept telling me that I was idealizing you, but fuck man. The love felt so real and yet here I am…

Should have ran long ago — I’m 18M and she’s 18F We would talk daily and hang out weekly I should have ran when you starting talking to my mate even though it was once a week I should have left the second you and him started…

I (26F) have a friend (30M) we were flirty and everything then I confessed to him — I (F) have been close friends with this guy for about 3 years, mostly long distance. We talk almost every day, call a lot, and have been pretty emotionally supportive of each other. Over time, I start…

I emotionally cheated — So were going through a rough phase. He was pretty much insecure, whenever my phone was busy he used to call my ex and check if his phone was also busy and was trying to play games. I had stopped talk…

UPDATE: I (32m) found out my partner (32f) cheated on me while she was away on holiday. She doesn’t know that I know. How do I navigate this? — Here's some context from my previous post: [https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship\_advice/comments/1s6r5cv/comment/od55fnc/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/1s6r5cv/…

My (M20) Dad (M59) says Heterosexual Relationships are only about Sex, is that really the case? — Was talking with my dad Earlier today, he was trying to explain me stuff abt Dating Life and stuff since I'm now 20... However, he mentioned something very bizarre and out of character for him. He st…

I f21 had sex with my friend m21 who is gay. What could this mean? — Hi, I'm 21f, bi, but more sexualy attracted to men. I've always questioned my sexuality about whether I was under the asexual umbrella since I've never found much pleasure in the act of sex with all t…

Looking back and realizing that, from the start, she went out of her way to try and hurt me with my triggers/personal limits, and how bizarre and petty that was to experience. — So, at this point it's been about two years since my narc went full no contact with me. I don't think it's super common for the narc to be the one to break things up, but a big reason is because I was…

I responded to an ex of mines no contact breach, with a link to Good Luck Babe — So i 18(M) had a 2 year long weird homoerotic friendship with a guy (20M) who had a boyfriend (22M) (i know stupid ofc) but in my defense, he pretty much introduced himself to me as "tortured guy stuc…

I (34M) recently cut all contact with her (26F) when she said she only wants friendship. — I’m looking for honest opinions because I feel really conflicted. I met this girl on a dating app. At first, we didn’t pursue anything because of some character differences. Later on, when I moved to…

My boyfriend (22M) of 18 months REFUSES to introduce me (22M) to his family, except as a “friend”. — For background, myself and my bf are from two different Western European countries, and met in a third country while studying. We lived in the same city for 9 months, including living together for a …

[20M] I lost the only person who truly loved me because I went on "autopilot" — I’ve been with my girlfriend for almost three years. We’ve been together since high school; I met her when I was 15 or 16, and she was 17 or 18. At first, we were just friends, and I liked her a lot—…

I, 26F am in a loving, commited relationship of 5 years with partner (25M), have additional strong feelings for another man (27M) — This dilemma requires years of backstory which I will concisely summarize to the best of my abilities. I (26F) am in a long term relationship with my partner (25M).We met while we were in undergrad (d…

I Found Out I Was the “Secret Girlfriend” Through a Private Story — So I (16F) started dating this girl, “Ava” (17F), about three months ago, and at first it felt like something straight out of a movie. We met through a mutual friend, started texting, and within like …

My boyfriend 33M might have had feelings for his “girl best friend”? 24F — My boyfriend (33M) and I (26F) have been together for about 6 months. The other night, he casually told me that his female friend (25F) just got married and eloped. What threw me off is that right af…

I (33M) felt triggered by my partner’s (43F) response to a message from a past situationship — unsure how to handle it — **Yes I used chatgbt to help write this out. My thoughts were too scattered and it helped break it down.** **TL;DR:** My partner (43F) got a reflective message from a past emotionally complicated par…

My girlfriend (28F) and I (30F) started TikTok lives for money and it completely messed everything up — So this is messy and I feel like I’m losing perspective on what’s normal, so I need outside opinions. I’m a 30F and I’ve been with my girlfriend 28F for 3 years. Over a month ago, my girlfriend want…

My bf cheated on me with some other girl and I forgave him — all this started with, me and him meeting on a social platform. we were chill at first but then feeling slowly started creeping in as you all know most of the people just sext around. and we did that …

Was I groomed at 15? — I am 33F This is a story from the time I was 14/15 and was enrolled to go to a coaching centre for mathematics tuitions The maths tutor (35M) was very charming and someone every student seemed to lo…

[23M] I can't move on from my ex-girlfriend [23F] after cutting contact two months ago over boundary issues. How do I stop ruminating and finally detach? — I was in a relationship with my ex (23F) for over a year. During that time, I was incredibly in love, attached, and admittedly pretty obsessed with her. Things took a turn when she suddenly made a ne…

brokeup with the love of my life for my betterment — just a long rant, and if people who were in the same boat/are in the same boat reading this, i would love some support. i ended a relationship that i know wasn’t right for me anymore. there were thin…

19M just broken up with abruptly by 20F — I (19M) and my now ex (20F) were dating for a total of 1.25 years. We began dating in January 2025. We met on hinge and were long distance "friends" for around a month before she first told me she lov…

how could i (21/F) tell my boyfriend (24/M) that i'm still friends with my ex? — my new boyfriend and i have been "official" for about two weeks now and everything is going really well. i feel like i need to talk to him about boundaries though because i am friends with my ex (22/M…

I (F 19 ) developed feelings for a “just friends” situation (M 19) how do I stay friends without hurting myself? — I’m a fairly simple person. My life was predictable..college, gym, home, repeat. I didn’t really have close friends. Not because I didn’t want them, but because I didn't connect easily. I have walls.…

First breakup, don’t have friends to talk to about it and feel so alone — I don’t know exactly what to say, I just feel so overwhelmed and upset and I just want to say something and stop keeping it in. It was my first “relationship”, if you would call it that, and was onli…

First breakup, don’t have friends to talk to about it and feel so alone — I don’t know exactly what to say, I just feel so overwhelmed and upset and I just want to say something and stop keeping it in. It was my first “relationship”, if you would call it that, and was onli…

I’m(M18) in a 4 year relationship(F18) but I want someone else(F18) — I thought I should post this because this has been bothering me for months and the only “person” I’ve talked to about it is ChatGPT.  I’ve been with my girlfriend since year 8 (we’re in year 12 now).…

Why the hell is falling in love so stressful? Is it just me, am I (31F) avoidant? I absolutely hate all this anxiety, but I also want him so badly and feel so amazing when I'm with him. (42M) — I genuinely don’t know if this is love, trauma, or me being avoidant/anxious, but this situation is messing with my head. I had a really bad breakup last year. He cheated, blocked me, the whole thing…

A list of Pros and Cons for My Ex — The title basically explains it all so let's get into it. Pros: \\-We Shared common interests and values \\-He was Real easy to talk to and I was honestly able to be myself around him. \\- The De…

M38 my wife f35 cheated with the person I hate the most — we were married in mid of 2018 and in mar 2019 I found out that she is cheating with a coworker ( ea and pa) when randomly saw a message in Whatsapp and got suspicious. so went thru the messages and c…

I told my roommate that my ex cheated on him after she betrayed me with the guy she told me not to worry about. How do I handle the guilt and potential fallout? — My ex-girlfriend 20F and I 23M broke up a couple weeks ago after dating for close to 6 months. For a long time, I had a gut feeling about a guy friend of hers (let’s call him Luke). She always told me…

She’s seeing another guy and I don’t know how I feel — Some backstory. We started speaking in August last year and stopped 3 weeks ago. Things were intense and great, sex was amazing and all. She introduced me to her family, her cousins and everything, he…

My (21M) GF (21F) Is Upset With My Followings — I (21M) and my GF (21F) have been together for 11 months. Recently she’s been coming to me upset with my instagram following. For the record i do not follow any models, OF creators none of that. Eithe…

I understand. Just a week before my wife left me she said “I’m so glad we are such a strong couple that if we needed counseling we would go to couples therapy” however what she really meant was “ plea…

Oh I’m sorry to hear that. I’m going ask you something: Would you be able to be just friends with him? Maybe play partners, maybe just a sexual connection? In fact the question is: would you like and…

Part of healing from anxious attachment style is learning not to persevere on the issue, responding to another persons need for space by giving them space, and having warm and direct conversations abo…

I just got out of a 10yr relationship, we still talk and have talked since we broke up. We broke up due to distance and needing to become our own people after having been in a relationship for so long…

*Should I text her or stay silent? Don’t want to restart hope or regret not trying.* I (male) am really confused about a girl and could use some clear advice. Around 2 months ago, I confessed to a …

I’m not on the regular dating apps anymore because I got ghosted >!and disgusting messages!<. Instead I try to find people that have the same interests, sometimes starting out as just friends and see …

I just had an issue with an fa today this is why I feel like she hates me; this is our third goal round of no contact in a relationship that never happened. We had sex one time and a bunch of text con…

I read an article from a DA that they’d start early dates with lines like ‘this is just casual, when this ends, we are just friends’ even though they really liked the person but could be all in with t…

Oh no, I gotcha 😆 I didn’t set out for this to be a serious thing, but we did meet on a dating site. So I kinda figured dating would be involved 😅 I wasn’t super in love and I didn’t think there was…

I acknowledge that I was and still am stupid, I broke contact with him because he scared me. I told him that I was a dismissive avoidant, so the second day we started talking he asked me to spend the …

Yes, but the interviewer doesn't know anything about it, they are doomed to repeat the same basic questions "why did you start?", "when did you start?" etc. I've heard all of them a hundred thousand t…

You’re 100% correct. In my mind I was still working with the belief that we’re still “more” than friends but all these comments made me realize that we’re just friends at the group activity and not…

that is a hard no. are you honestly okay with just friendship?

What is it he's doing that is like someone who is romantically interested? Can you ask him to refrain from that kind of stuff if he's not romantically interested? It's up to you to communicate where …

Haha, I had a man tell me early on that if god had put together the perfect woman for him, it would be me. He later cheated and married his ex who he was "just friends" with.

I somewhat share your view, but relationships can be fluid. Several male friends I have now, I originally had somewhat romantic feelings or small crushes on when we first met and now that’s worn off a…

Yeah, the only person I've ever talked to on the phone that often was someone I was in an LDR with - we talked on the phone every day even when we were "just friends" and we've continued that pattern …

In cases like this where if you're interested in pursuing something romantic and she is not, I personally believe it's better to just cut off all contact but tell her that if she ever changes her mind…

She has already come back once and this is kinda what I got for letting her back, I thought she was being honest with me about understanding that I said if she returned it couldn’t be “just friends.” …

She’s the one who offered me dinner and kept talking about how excited she was to give me a gift… I really thought she’d be there for me after she skipped out last year about 3.5 weeks before my birth…

I’ve gotten over it once and right after I did she came back, I genuinely did think I was using logic in what I did *because* I laid out my criteria for her returning. I didn’t expect her to honestly,…

This is fascinating. A guy I was seeing for 5 months pulled back on NYE (we had a fight on NYE) but we communicated sporadically for a week and then picked back up. But he ghosted me for 2 days at the…

Three methods I know to work besides therapy(seriously). The first is exposure therapy via asking strangers for the time. Just the time. Take your watch off and hide your phone. "Um...could I get th…

We know each other IRL, so discussing that kind of stuff ahead of time would've been weird. (One point in favor of the app ecosystem). I really don't think the "just friends" part is a copout on her p…

maybe just put the ball in her court? let her know you’re also interested in hanging out again and to let you know when it works best for her. moving forward on feelings is always challenging. is thi…

The biggest things I've seen that work for me is that having a decent amount of confidence, reading the room, and just being funny is what get people to really like you in dating. I'm not attractive…

Had a pretty amazing day hanging out with a newer friend (40?F) 1:1 finally after me or her getting sick and having to postpone previous attempts, and until now have only gone out together with mutual…

Yup this mine had 2 emotional affairs and the second one 2 years later left with the affair partner she was hiding the fact she was texting him till 1am and saying they are just friends in a relations…

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Almost 5 months. I don't want to date ever again or create a deep connection with anyone. I have a lot of trust issues now because of my ex, so I don't think I could have a healthy relationship anymor…

Yes, my ex dumped me back in 2022 after 6.5 years together. Got with another girlfriend less than 4 months later when I was still very much not moved on. I tried to move on but honestly it was very h…

“We were morally wrong” so to him, being in a same sex relationship with me (which he started btw) was morally wrong, but cheating on me wasn’t, got it. “I was with you because it was convenient” oh …

I sort of align with your last partner in that if I am single, I do not mind having sex with multiple people. I rarely actually do this, but I will if I want to. And I always pretty much just assume t…

I look . . . It makes me just want to concentrate on me. But I havent met any quality folks. Just friends that I cant fully accept either because I know theyre not healed or folks that likely have is…

Original copy of post by u/GarlicRepublic99: Dating a wonderful man for almost two years. We both are divorced and were cheated on. So we’ve both come into this acknowledging that trust is hard for u…

I now find if someone is being charming,it's usually a front for a narcissistic person. One of my ex's friends has an online presence,a public page and I have watched some of her reels. She is complet…

I wouldn’t beat yourself up over this. What likely happened is she reached out for a bit of nostalgia or comfort, and once she felt that connection again she pulled back. When you started leaning in m…

I have 3 or 4 very good male friends whom I have known for many years…. one for decades. They all flirt from time to time . I’ve made it quite clear we’re all just friends and they respect that. I’d…

Burnt out. Trying to work on myself but also longing for connection outside of just friendship.

I don't like to use the term "normal" when describing relationships because every relationship is unique to the two people involved. From what you have written here, this does not sound like a health…

1. Dated a narc coworker (I know I know terrible decision) she was inquiring about hanging out outside of work March 2024 while she still was in a relationship she labeled abusive. That was my first…

ah fuck that's rough. i'm so sorry she did that to you. partner betrayal is extremely destabilizing and painful. it takes a long time to recover if you do it right. my wp had a 19 month affair tha…

Literally none. People in the comments apparently can’t fathom a man and a woman being just friends. Also people who travel as much as OP’s ex tend to collect people from all around the world (from…

I am writing with the help of a translator, so there may be inaccuracies. Hi, it's been about 6 months since my girlfriend dumped me. The parting was as peaceful as possible, but it was probably pain…

Absolutely not! I've learned my lesson that men don't want to be "just friends" with women. So generally speaking all my friends are women.

I wouldn't with this guy. He ignores polite conventions and personal boundaries. He was at you for one thing by this point in the evening and he will continue to press you for more. In other words, …

Was just listening to a dating podcast about profile tips and the importance of putting out your interests and passions, and looking for people that share them, as a good leaping off point. Remembere…

I am in therapy. For a while now, but maybe I need to switch expertise. I am in trauma/ grief counseling My partner personally says he isn’t bothered by it that much. I can’t quite explain it. I tru…

Have you read "Not Just Friends"? It is a great read. It puts things into perspective. True healing CAN occur and not all emotional infidelities progress to physical. Reddit is a sample of the truly …

Lol maybe you are 👽 JK. I just don't understand why you need to resolve your feelings when there's no chance at dating each other, and why there's any need to resolve feelings if you're just friend…