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Thank you for taking the time to read and respond! I 100% agree and you probably stated it best. When something someone says hurts me, or even silence... I take it very personally and begin to eithe…
🕊️ Community Reminder: Respectful Dialogue & Open Exchange — Hey everyone, We just want to take a moment to thank all of you for helping make r/AstralProjection one of the most interesting and supportive spaces on Reddit. Every day, people from around the worl…
It's not lovebombing. It's grooming. — Adult grooming is a pattern where someone gradually (or rapidly) builds trust, lowers boundaries, gathers leverage, and conditions an adult target to tolerate confusion, dependency, secrecy, or sexual…
My husband (34M) told his friends about my miscarriage as a “joke” and now says I’m overreacting (32F) — I don’t even know how to explain this without sounding insane I had a miscarriage 3 months ago. It was early but it still wrecked me. My husband (together 5, married 2) knows that. He saw how bad it …
Apologies for posting again. Apparently I am the abuser and narcissist - I am beyond devastated. No more sharing stuff online for me. *TW - unaliving mention* — I apologise for posting again but this may well be the last social media post I ever make. I am totally devastated and feel close to unaliving. I know that sound dramatic and I am deeply ashamed but t…
Blue Therapy Mike and Yasmin — Wow. Literally. This man is unbelievable. He’s a lazy, liar. Sitting around all day expecting his partner to not only work her arse off but deal with EVERYTHING alone, kids, home, financially. H…
[Partner] Wife’s suppressed severe trauma surfaced. She’s in extreme ‘flight’ mode, refusing therapy, and I am burning out. Need honest outlooks. — \*\*Added some new context at the end Hi everyone. I’m hoping to find some perspective, hard truths, or shared experiences from those who have navigated severe PTSD/CPTSD dynamics. I am completely e…
I was mass-deleting apps from my phone every week. So I built something different instead. — I'm going to be honest with you. I tried everything. Screen Time limits - I'd just tap "Ignore." Deleting apps - I'd reinstall them within hours. Grayscale mode - lasted two days. Digital detox apps…
I feel stuck — Hey hey, Im 25m, autistic and have experienced trauma my whole life. I struggle greatly with appreciating the amount of work and success I have achieved in the past, to still keep on going. Every li…
The most unconventional ways of thinking that help you? I'll go first — ***"They have the audacity, why can't I?***" Sometimes I struggle with standing up for myself and my needs/boundaries. I get stuck in my head, scared about whether what I'm saying is fair, or balanc…
10 Tips That Actually Made No Contact Stick For Me (127 Days NC) — After seeing so many “I broke NC again” posts, I figured I’d share what finally worked for me. I’m 127 days in after a 3-year situationship that was slowly destroying my peace. No dramatic story today…
What do you actually believe? — I'm going through a divorce, and I'm trying to wrap my head around some of the things that my STBXW has been saying. For context, she had a brief affair a couple years ago, and we patched things up, b…
Starting chores starting starting starting — Yes I have adhd/depression/anxiety/autism/ptsd/ocd. Yes I have ADHD. Work 12pm-8pm most days. Most days go like this. Wake up around 8-9. Try to get out of bed. Too tired so lie in bed dicking aro…
5 DNA reasons why u feel so painful after broke up.(that's also why u need "no-contact theory") — 1. Back in the hunter-gatherer days, if you being completely alone meant you were basically dead. To keep you from wandering off and getting eaten(real eat mean), evolution wired social rejection to t…
5 DNA reasons why u feel so painful after broke up. — 1. Back in the hunter-gatherer days, if you being completely alone meant you were basically dead. To keep you from wandering off and getting eaten(real eat mean), evolution wired social rejection to t…
Nmom is acting creepy towards my sister and I don't know what to tell her — There's so much backstory to this, but I don't even have energy to explain all of it. Long story short, me F37, my sister, let's call her Elle, F31 and her teenage kids, live together in an apartment …
woke up LC escalation with a timestamp fake-out — i’m coming out of dorsal vagal collapse from CPSTD and massive recent trauma. it left me unable to work for awhile (still trying to get there without my brain shutting down) and went to stay with my m…
Received an envelope from my family (nc) — Hey 👋 I went nc with my family in January and my nmom showed up one single time in February. Since then they never tried to reach out. In the meantime I had my birthday and Easter has also passed.…
I’m struggling with jealousy and insecurity in my relationship because of weight changes, how do I work through this in a healthy way? — About a year and a half ago, both my boyfriend and I started gaining weight. Fast forward to now, and he’s pretty much back to his old physique, maybe even in better shape than before. Meanwhile, I’ve…
Family drama between me 45F and my brother 46M after I was named executor of the estate — I am 45F, and my brother is 46M. I have always had issues with him my whole life. He is adopted after my parents struggled with fertility, and then I was the surprise pregnancy that occurred just as h…
Me [23M] and my GF [23F] are having a disagreement and we need your thoughts. — Me \[23M\] and my GF \[23F\] have been together for about 2 years now. Ever since we have been together, she has asked me on at least 50 occassions if I would be up to try having sex with a man, somet…
Learning about CPTSD — Hello everyone, first of all I want to apologize if my English is not the best. I wanted to ask for an opinion about something… my earliest memories as a child are of not wanting to go to daycare, th…
I am FA but lean dismissive so take my response with a grain of salt. I tend to disappear from time to time not out of anger or resentment but because my nervous system just demands space to reset. I…
The demonization of avoidant people really annoys me. I'm fearful avoidant so I see all perspectives in this and yeah avoidance is hurtful, neglect is painful, creating space through fights is toxic a…
By not chasing and instead matching their pace. Absolutely reply when they text you, and match the energy if you can. Ideally you’d want to be perceived as safe, so when they text you should be detach…
It isn’t. Avoidance, more so than AA, is deeply unconscious. Consciously, we want to show up for our partners and to be vulnerable, which makes it difficult to recognize the fact that we are distancin…
It's everything, I feel so guilty because they are being nothing but lovely and I'm still feeling the need to step away, so I try very hard to show that I also care, I'm also dedicated, I also love th…
I think you're on to something, I was just replying to another comment where I said that I give a lot to prove I'm also committed and then feel unappreciated and either shut off or start a fight over …
Sounds like gold what you just said though - “punishing for something you weren’t aware you needed yourself “
Hey OP I remember your previous posts. I'm sorry you're going through this. Expecting warmth from someone who's gone cold is a punishment in itself, so stop punishing yourself and stop waiting for som…
you're punishing your partner because you have health anxiety and are unable to manage your own emotions so you expect them to do it for you - like you do for others. but really, people should manage …
Watch your internal narrative. No punishing yourself or leaning into narratives that have no evidence. Start doing daily affirmations in the mirror. Don’t read too much into his online behavior!
What you are experiencing is a pretty typical thing to deal with in anxious attachment. It usually is related to the relationship with yourself. Your self esteem and self worth is tied up with this an…
Yes, I understand your point. My outlook is that nobody ticks all your boxes so compromise in a few areas is essential if you're mostly getting what you want in a partner. True, I tried to not get ahe…
All feelings are real. You’re punishing yourself for feeling what’s right. Right now, you are your only priority. Waves of pain will come and go until they slowly dissolve. And you need to be there fo…
As for the end of my post - I meant that I kind of feel like god is punishing me, or the universe, I don't know, I'm not really religious. It's just a thought... I don't actually believe it I suppose.
Saturn in Aries is Saturn in fall, meaning the restriction is pushing against a sign that fundamentally resists being contained. That tension is exactly what makes these periods feel extreme rather th…
Asians had high poverty rates in New York. They're just punishing work ethic and prioritization. Racism.
Regarding the impermanence of gifted possessions, my experience was that since my NM viewed me primarily as an extension of herself, like an appliance, that she was entitled to control, anything that…
Thank you I recognise “my thoughts & opinions had to echo theirs and any attempt to assert a different point of view was perceived as treacherous behaviour that needed punishing” With my mother ever…
“The only antidote to shame is humility.” -Uncle Iroh. When I was younger, I’d gone through my first serious break up. My ex and I both severely mistreated each other, and the break up was messy (to…
Holy shit, this one. Not turning surly and brittle, not snapping at me, just... keeping cool and being open when things go wrong. "Yeah, it's tough at the moment, not gonna lie, but you and I are good…
OP - here's the problem: you were already rugsweeping this toxic relationship. You said: >"I’m walking on eggshells around him. He can be very strict and when he gets angry he sometimes gives silen…
Agree. Describing a significant other as “strict” is a huge, waving red flag. OP, adults are not supposed to feel like they have a “strict” partner. That language usually means there is a power imbal…
This is so strange, I was just talking to my FA friend about this and it’s recommended on Reddit now! Wonder if she saw this. Sharing my thoughts from a secure perspective. So first: a lot of relatio…
It has been over 35 years since the cheating and more than 25 years since you found out? And her being a good wife in that time isn't enough that you could even bring yourself to wear your wedding rin…
yeeeep; my mother did something similar when I asked for her to not come over unannounced; she threw a fit and then said she wasn't going to come over at all and would stop sending me presents etc...s…
I hear you, and I need you to know this, what you’re describing is not beyond repair, even if it feels like it is right now. The fact that you feel this much conviction, shame, and awareness tells me …
You don't have to forgive yourself, but you also don't need to keep punishing yourself.
Nah, the way I'd walk out of that situation immediately. He said something awful. And look, if this was... stress, grief, drinking etc. all piling up and he said something stupid because he was tryi…
Was there an apology? His friends looked mortified because you're married to a sick individual. Btw >This morning he said I’m dragging this out and punishing him because I’m still grieving and need s…
It's not that you are punishing him for saying something offensive. It seems more like maybe this is opening your eyes and you are finally seeing him for who he actually is. And that maybe you don't r…
I don't think he is a bad person. He just thinks its okay to make a joke about a private personal issue that is highly innappropriate at your expense. He's just a shitty person, that's all. The fac…
Depriving you of proper nutrition and sleep is ABUSE! And punishing you by making you write things over and over again just for talking in class is inappropriate. Parents should love and nurture and c…
Your husband is resentful and actively punishing you. He believes because he works and pays bills you should do 100% of everything else irrespective of anything going on with you or that you work, and…
That's abuse. You know that right? Constantly accusing you of cheating, and punishing you emotionally for the cheating he thinks is happening. Is this the only subject he is abusive about? Or d…
“Always the villain for one bad moment” then it is not one moment. You said he often makes these bad jokes at your expense and you either laugh it off and pretend you are okay or you are upset and he …
The reaction of the friends show how this was not a joke, and clearly not taken by them as a joke. No lie, I'd be done with this marriage if I was you, because this is unacceptable, and his behaviour…
I don't think the fading away of the Stop Asian Hate movement is all that unique. Other movements like Black Lives Matter, Me Too, the Women's March, March for Our Lives (the anti-gun violence movemen…
Clearly "this says something really bad about who he is as a person." Whether it's a dealbreaker depends on what standards you have for yourself. I can't imagine wanting to live with (let alone try to…
I went through something similar, so here's some advice I remember my mom punishing me by sending me to the mental hospital because "my school attendance was bad and i kept misbehaving at home". Ever…
Never fake an orgasm, you are only punishing yourself by doing so. Also you two are not compatible.
In my opinion, they feel entitled and it's part of self-aggrandizing. One dealbreaker for me was that the person would accuse me of 'subtly punishing him' if I didn't fawn over him and try to 'make up…
you didn’t “ruin” anything! your body hit the brakes because you weren’t comfortable him punishing you for that says way more about him than you
You are joking, right? This has to be a troll. If you aren't you either dump the lowlife or read up on what a healthy threesome looks like and then hopefully dump the lowlife. Some pointers: …
YOU SHOULD NOT BE SORRY. He is punishing you for not instantly becoming his sex fantasy which is only realistic in porn, not real life. He is NOT a keeper. A decent partner who loves and respects yo…
yeah that is exactly how pluto in the 7th plays out. it is not losing interest. it is that intimacy creates exposure, and exposure triggers the part of you that learned early that being fully known is…
Maybe you dodged a bullet. The way you describe the relationship sounds like two people without a clearly defined sense of self thinking "you complete me" or worse, "you *are* me." Maybe spend some…
Hooooo boy. Where to start? 1. Your bf already had interest in this *teenager* before he brought up boredom. Then he gaslit you into being OK with him cheating. Would he have been OK with you wanting…
If you have the time I’d suggest trying a new board game or sport with friends. It’s rewarding but doesn’t feel punishing. If you have even more time then joining a volunteer group could be a good opt…
This is painful but grounded: no contact is often less about punishing an avoidant ex and more about stopping yourself from chasing clarity from someone who is too shut down to offer it. Just be car…
I can see that. I had a heart-breaking convo with my mom last summer or so basically thorwing it all on the table saying how I don't feel we have an emotionally connection and I don't like that. She i…