ambivalence

Well yeah something was wrong, she started saying that was after I'd kicked her out of the house for neglecting our kids and myself for her online games and friends. She is/was severely underfunctioni…

FA breakup & prolonged limbo - does avoidance calcify over time or can it still reverse? — I’m hoping to hear from people who’ve been through something similar, FAs, or anyone who has opinions on this. I was in a 2 year relationship with someone I later realized is fearful avoidant (I didn…

Ex said she loves me but isn’t in love, then sent mixed signals after breakup — trying to understand what’s going on — I (27M) recently went through a breakup with my ex (26F), and I’m trying to make sense of the situation without getting pulled back into something confusing. For context, she studied veterinary medic…

>am I dealing with a DA/FA or this man is just making a fool out me? Por qué no los dos? He is textbook FA and he is absolutely bsing you. You are well off not participating in those hot and cold ga…

Why do you say contempt shows ambivalence? I’ve never thought about it that way and I think that’s a really interesting point.

So the solution to "jumping to conclusion" is not "giving the benefit of a doubt": it's learning to investigate with kindness and with non-violence communication. From a neuroscience perspective, you …

I'd trust my partner to tell me what they need. It doesn't need to be some long conversation. "I need to go to hospital", I'd take them to hospital. Otherwise I'd just be there for comfort. And I don'…

I feel like I could have written this, word for word. I completely understand! Like you, I came to a realization that I was probably always going to live with my avoidant attachment and so, had to f…

Coping question: when an anxious fear feels like it came true Hi everyone, I’m looking for coping tools and perspective, not relationship advice. I have an anxious attachment style, and in my last d…

I don't have any advice but I wanted to say I totally relate to your confusion and ambivalence surrounding romantic relationships. I'm also unsure if I'm aromantic or just very avoidant or maybe a mix…

Seeing A tonight for the first time in around 11 days due to his work. I'm looking forward to seeing him but i'm also feeling weirdly detached from it all. I don't think I missed him as much as I expe…

I did voice my need several times. Originally she reacted with disgust at the idea of any form of touch, but then pretended she didn't mean it afterwards. Later with ambivalence. Now she says she's wi…

Ugh, that ambivalence is so relatable! It's like, "Cool, I had a decent time, but do I *really* want to invest more energy?" I've been there too, wondering if I'm just not clicking with anyone or if I…

Hmm, I totally understand what you're saying, and it's making me think... because she was signalling true interest in me till she had that bumble date with that guy, and then it just stopped. There re…

I get it. I am out of a 10 mo relationship and it’s a BUMMER esp when the weather gets spring like. I wonder what he’s doing, if he met someone, I want him to miss me even though he was a complete…

I disagree that there was ever a meaningful movement of any political consequence. The potential movement was dead on arrival for a few reasons. Beginning with the original branding under the slogan S…

> Then, a couple of the most widely circulated recorded incidents of violence against Asian elders happened to document crimes perpetrated by Black men. Which caused ambivalence in activist quarters g…

I'm not disputing that. But nobody's reading the stats. What matters is what people see coming through their social feeds. All it takes is one incident. I remember at least a couple, one in New York a…

I went through this a couple of months back and can completely relate to how you feel. If its any help, I actually discussed this with my therapist who has a PhD in behavioral psychology and its quite…

She gave him an explanation. She didn’t disappear. She told him she doesn’t see herself with him long term. By the way, I’ve been on both sides of the story, I know how both feel. I’ve had someone i…

I’ve been in a similar situation- sorry you experienced this, I had that same painful conflicted feeling. In the end it wasn’t until several years after the relationship ended, in a more healed state,…

Wishful thinking is super common on this sub. When your spouse asks for a divorce, it hurts so bad and it feels like the end of the world.  So we try wishful thinking.  Most couples do not reconcile …

You can get out of it by using reactivation techniques, but the fastest way out of it is to regulate your nervous system. Eventually you’ll have to learn to feel your feelings in your body, so that yo…

For some people, infidelity is not a dealbreaker. That's everybody's personal choice. I told myself it wasn't one for me for too long. Maybe it would be different if she showed any remorse, which she …

Hi! I might have to respond in multiple parts/at different times. All of your points make complete sense. I didn’t intend for my post to come off like I thought that intelligence was 100% always a f…

Thanks. She was ambivalent about ending things but I couldn’t stay in that ambivalence so I said I had to end it. It’ll be 6/7 weeks post breakup when I reach out, due to my timeline with my job; I’m …

She wanted some thing like catching up once a week, which would have killed me as I love her. Her ambivalence would have fucked me bigly, so I forced nc. Now, 5 weeks post all that and 2-3 months bef…

A few months ago I would have wholeheartedly agreed with you. Looking down on people, learned helplessness. Janina Fisher and her book Healing the selves [...] is the first time I've ever felt seen an…

That tracks, it’s like i can feel the ambivalence dripping from him, It feels like he’s somehow pushing the gas pedal all the way on both