book
you're safe
Evidence
Citations (52)
Your nervous system doesn't speak English. It speaks breath. — Combat soldier, 3 tours Helmand, Danish veteran. PTSD diagnosis 2017. For years I tried to think my way out. Read books, did therapy, talked it through. It helped but it didn't stop the body from goi…
No contact isn't about them. It's about teaching your nervous system that you survive without the response. — Nobody told me this when I started and I wish they had. I thought no contact was a strategy to make them miss me. Or a test of willpower. Or punishment for both of us. It's none of that. Your brain…
Wow, this is a beautiful way to look at it. I can imagine that that siren going off for me, is actually a scared little girl tugging on my shirt hem with tears in her eyes. I just need to look down. L…
People who are capable of ending relationships abruptly will always be capable of doing so. Doesn't matter how long they stay. They can detach and leave at any time. You know you're safe. Your body fe…
>You know you're safe. I think you meant to say *not* safe.
Heyo folks, I'm curious if anyone on this sub has had success in finding nervous system regulating techniques that they've applied over an extended period of time to help with rewiring your anxious r…
In my experience, my anxious attachment/trauma-based symptoms calm significantly as soon as the person I'm dating shows me a pattern of consistency. It's just harder for our systems to believe that th…
You're safe for her because she can keep you at a distance literally and figuratively, but she won't compromise for you so everything will be on her terms. I wouldn't expect more than what you have ri…
100% with you on this. My lucid nightmares are by far the most vivid and "complete" dreams I have. Regular dreams feel like channel surfing sometimes, just random scenes stitched together. But nightma…
That helpless feeling when someone you love has already moved on — it's crushing and disorienting after six years together. His timeline for moving on says absolutely nothing about what you shared or …
Male <-> female polarity. It's somehow easier to send root from guys to girls and vice versa, since that's the natural way. It's like guys send root safety, foundation... And the girl sends back hear…
I imagine adding an addendum of 'sex might be okay once we get to know each other and I understand that you're safe and I feel comfortable being intimate with you at my place' is important, assuming y…
Well done.Sounds like you in growth and she's just stuck.She's reached out to you because you're safe,additionally she would have seen your growth and is thinking you'd be good to grab onto. From your…
We are! I'm having some other issues in daily life just from missing documents and stuff they kept from me, but otherwise I am doing pretty well these days. Thank you! I hope you're safe where you are…
okay sorry commenting AGAIN but i want to elaborate: i'm not trying to fearmonger i just want to be real that at best this man did not pay enough attention to you during a very intimate and vulnerable…
Ugh. Not good. That's scary, tbh. I just called a child abuse hotline on my best friend. 😞 I hope you can get out soon and make that call. I hope you're safe.
You have to look out for yourself first and foremost. I'm glad you're safe
I was 3 or only just 4*. I remember my mum saying "At least you're home and I know you're safe." And I distinctly remember thinking "This is f*king safe?!" As it was before the worse stuff happened…
That's awful. I hope you're safe in a better place now 💜
I've been following your story. What you did took insane courage. Now that you're safe, get a burner phone and a new number. Assume everything electronic you brought with you is compromised. Check you…
Fear isn't danger. Fear is just your body warning you about POSSIBLE danger. Like on a rollercoaster - you're safe but your body thinks you're about to fall to your death, so you feel fear. Just li…
Ugh, I'm so sorry about your situation, and I've definitely been there. I think there's something about asian cultures that really hate on newer generations being more open about sexuality, since that…
Wow amazing story I'm so glad you're safe. I know what you mean about the environment "dimming" as the experience begins. Have you had anything supernatural/ET (related to this or not) happen since?
That's so sad that you went to the library to look up the word. The stripping of self esteem is the opposite of how actual parenting works. These small incidents are actually tragic. I hope you're …
Yeah we're powerful. Believe you're safe and you are 🤷🏼 just my opinion. Sleep paralysis was my entry to this whole world. I've been able to get out of my body, float around my room/astral project. …
No, he's a dick. it's called test and apologize, it's a typical predator maneuver. Some so it with words, others actions. I'm glad you're safe now
My family is the worst for this. Oddly enough, today I met my probation officer for the first time, and he was one of the kindest people I've met about this though. He said, "don't worry, you're safe …
There are some laws that exclude penetration with fingers in regards to rape. Digital penetrations is still rape even if the law refuses to acknowledge it. There are laws that exclude female predato…
Being teased until emotionally breaking down. I know all families tease each other, but in most families you're safe to say "that's enough" and then everyone stops picking on you. I didn't have that k…
Exactly, it's really scary the first time you say no to them, but it gets easier. You'll realize that the fear you feel is a reaction to your childhood when you were under her control and it was genui…
I just used technique that felt right in the moment/ for that specific things Like for skincare etc, I used to watch hauls, or skincare routine videos for 10-15 mins and would visualise, fake play li…
Don't worry, you're safe. My dad is a former soldier (in Europe), and reality isn't like in the movies. Trump doesn't have a button in his office that he can press if he's not happy. It doesn't work l…
You're welcome! Take your time before studying this, though. It's still a complex and scary topic so watching cute movies or walking in nature is still a better way to ease your mind! You probably hav…
I'm so sorry. But please don't try to fight it, you're actively extending it by trying to calm it down with walks and magnesium and what have you. By trying to eliminate the state you're effectively s…
Or tell the service staff before going depending where it is. That you're safe to get to your car etc.
As a mother myself I will add the chorus and say, I'm so happy you're safe!!!
I'll be your dad: "I'm so glad you're safe. Please stay where you are."
I'm so sorry, I hope you're safe now. She is dangerous and very disconnected from reality. Everything we needed emotionally as children we have to cobble together for ourselves as adults.
cheating is the most intimate betrayal. if she cheats on her husband, why would you think you're safe from that level of betrayal? you need to tell him, unfortunately. before she realizes whats up and…
There's an app called Resonant breathing and I use this for five minutes to calm my nervous system. I dissociate and have severe whole body muscle guarding pain and tension. The app basically plays a …
I could give a 3-hour TedTalk on this one! If you want to get to know your true self, be willing to look at the fears and desires that come up for you. Not to "fix" them or yourself, but to get to kno…
Biiig hug OP, you did such brave work here. You're safe now, and you got out. You're justified in blocking her and never interacting with her again, if that's what you need to be ok. You can explain t…
Yeah do not send if you're hoping to get back together. You need to be grounded, warm but more importantly grounded. When ppl break up they don't care how you think or see things. It's just psychology…
What they want is you broken. In the end that's the power a narcissist has/wants/works with. You putting on a mask to play the game, does not mean that you are not a human being. It means you ar…
Wow, that must have been a horrible situation for him. Not just the deceit from his grandparents, and how dangerous it was, but being trapped in a vehicle with your Mum yelling, and seeing how much it…
With the very limited information I have, if he's stopping temporarily, its in his control and not an accident. Like if someone only acts a certain way behind closed doors and not in front of other pe…
No. When I divorced my ex my lawyer had me move out in the 8 hours he was at work at his minimum wage job. He called me while he was driving home. I told him then. If he hadn't called he would have fo…
Just realised I didn't address your feelings of being alone and unwanted, Im also dealing with that and something that has helped me has been to try and join an online gaming server (this could be any…
Hey there. As you're reading from other comments it is important to not just "Open the door" to any contact, but to set limitations to who may contact you. It seems odd that in such a non-physical e…
I think that usually happens when your nervous system detects that you're safe enough to process and deal with it now, even though it's still bad. Give yourself as much time, space and support to deal…
Yes and.... no. Mostly no. Here's the thing, all those fantastic beasts so to say are actually no different than you and me for the most part. Some astral experiences can be wildly different than any…
could just be good old paranoia! when you get that feeling, affirm to yourself that you're safe, and try not to dwell on the feeling of fear! i used to get the same feeling, but it was just anxiety an…