trusting

From my experience the way he described it was the confusing part, especially considering the dozen translations there are of this book. Personally I think that a few things he is not right about w…

If you're sending ALL paid traffic to your homepage, you're burning money - here's why — I see this constantly: businesses dropping serious money on paid ads - Google, Meta, Instagram, only to send traffic straight to their homepage. Then they’re shocked when the cost per lead is through…

Feeling smothered by an AP friend… — This is part reflection/observation, and part question at the bottom. It’s interesting and a bit funny to me, I rarely feel avoidant in my attachments. The test I took for this sub, showed all secur…

Starting over — Heya, I don’t want this to be a negative thread— looking for some positivity and hope maybe? I (34F) am recently out of a one year relationship. It was my first secure relationship in my entire adult…

Finding proof that you were right to be anxious — I'm sure others can relate to this, but whenever I start dating someone, I look for signs that they don't actually like me. Things like "he took hours to text back" or "he was a little quieter than us…

learning to trust with new potential partners — What do you think are some healthy ways to slowly trust someone again in a romantic context so if things go wrong it doesn't feel like moving on is like an impossible task emotionally? I don’t mean t…

I want to to start healing so badly, how can I? — I recently posted here my journey of realizing I have a fearful avoidant attachment. I used to think I was anxious but I realize I'm fearful avoidant and I don't want this anymore. I want to stop push…

Everything we know about shifting is probably false — So much of our communities take the knowledge we spread to be fact, when in reality shifting isn’t a science. At all. This has been said before but I NEED you guys to actually read and internalize thi…

Why Being Ok With Not Having Your Desire Manifests It Faster — It’s a very contradictory thing in manifesting where you desire something, but you’re told to let it go and not care about whether or not you have it (because in 4D you already have it). But let’s fo…

Where to go from here — Just to warn you, this is a long one... For context, my partner (F39) and I (M40) have been together for 17 years, have two kids together. This all started in early January but seems to have been goi…

I texted her. Here's what I said. I hope this was honest and vulnerable enough. — OK so, this will be a long one. I fucked up. I have some many things to tell you, so many regrets with a heavy heart. I'll start with I miss you. I've been missing you for a long time now. I haven't t…

I Won’t Stop Sharing This — I’m sharing this because people deserve to know how broken the mental health system in Utah can be. I saw a therapist for two years. During that time she had me coming up to three times per week doin…

I hate narcissists! — I tried so hard to forgive. I even made a comment here months ago about forgiveness. I was trying to delude myself. Narcissists deserve to rot and burn in the lowest depths of hell there is. How can y…

The distrust of my family in India finally pays off — My APs usually talk about how well my family’s kids are doing and how they’re doing medicine and grad programs and all that jazz, but today including a few before, things have been quiet about my fami…

I (32F) trusted my partner (34M) completely until I discovered he lied about a “friend” he talks to daily and that they were texting very appropriate. I’m shaking and feeling lost — I’m a 32F and my partner is 34M. We’ve known each other for many years and have a long history together. We were apart for a while in the past but recently decided to try again because we both felt th…

How to begin the “healing” — STBXW (33) and I (M33) had been having issues in our marriage since December. She eventually opened up and said she feels she doesn’t love me anymore. That broke me, but it felt like something we coul…

UPDATE: I thought my marriage just felt loveless…turns out there was a reason — Original post: [https://www.reddit.com/r/Divorce/s/9esS6gNKMJ](https://www.reddit.com/r/Divorce/s/9esS6gNKMJ) Hi everyone, I posted a while ago saying that my marriage felt empty and loveless, but th…

Breakup with my partner and best friend — Its one of the first time im using reddit so im hope it'll be alright. I've had a best friend. He's been my confident for 10 years, he was my safe person, I was relying on him for everything. 3 year…

Surprise Surprise another tale of a cheater — Surprise Surprise another tale of a cheater Throw away account Midwest USA(MI) M42 F40 Two kids 20years of married Found out late December clear signs of cheating (got to work bag, bottle of lu…

Stoic Polytheism — Hello Friends! I have a question regarding the theology of the Classical Stoics. Did they hold a mere pantheism, with 'the Gods' merely being different names of one and the same Logos? Or, are they as…

The 'technique' that helped me manifest in 1 week what I have been trying for months — I decided to make this a more general post since it's extremely helpful for any manifestation. Like everyone, I was trying to manifest something for a few months with common techniques like visualizi…

I Changed Myself and Got it All — Hello, I’ve been wanting to write this post for a very long time. Grab a snack and come along for the ride! **The Beginning: April - October 2022** I discovered Neville 4 years ago; after a year of …

I wanted to discuss letters 3 to 5 of Moral Letters. — I just finished letters 3 to 5 of Letters From a Stoic by Seneca.  I wanted to summarise what I got from them, and talk with y'all about the parts I didn’t fully understand. If I misrepresented or mis…

Which planet and/or aspect should I focus on and work with to remedy my inability to form lasting intimate relationships and friendships? — As you can see I have a T-square between Mars, Venus and Saturn and I have Pluto on the Ascendant opposite Chiron. I'm 56, not married, no kids, I only had one boyfriend in my early twenties for about…

how to really manifest! you don’t need to “do” more. you need to live differently. — it’s not that deep!! i really want to help people with this and share what i know but it’s so so hard to put into words what im trying to say! it’s like it’s almost too simple to explain in words, so…

The extent to which people operate from the lower chakras boggles my mind — I‘ve been doing lots of lower chakra work lately. Cleared out a bunch of blockages in my root and sacral. Easier to breathe, easier to connect with others. But I regularly have this feeling that I…

Leaving this subreddit and what I learned — It’s over and i think I’ve come to terms with my break up . After three months of being on here and almost six months since the ending of my last relationship , I’ve used this forum to pour out my fee…

My GF (22F) told her parents about my (24M) secret financial situation — I had a very rich/powerful dad who died when I was a child and left me a lot of money. After he died, all his sycophant, money grubbing “friends” tried to dig their claws into me. They would try to ma…

Accidental awakening — Officially effed around and found out. Open to advice but I also feel an obligation to share that this is possible through the tapes because I never saw it coming and I'm currently struggling. I was …

A success story I’d like to share with you — Three jobs that are exactly what I wanted, money and something about love Last December, I was laid off from my full-time job, had €4,000 in debt, and was living alone, even though my partner and I …

Getting a story about an ex from 20 years ago off my chest — TLDR: Had a weird break up. Reached out after 20 years. Got a response that made me feel bad. Learned a lesson about not trusting what people say during a break up, instead listen to what they do. I …

I (m31) had my first real argument with my husband (m32) about children over the weekend and I dont know where it leaves us? — Over the weekend husband brought up the idea of us having children. Over the 10 years we have been together (4 married) I had thought that this was a settled question. We had agreed that while both …

What is the easiest way to move on from a breakup? — I broke up last night with my ex of 2 years who I saw on and off for the last 10 months or so. It’s been painful. I spent 3 months on my own and missed him badly 2 weeks ago and reached out to him. O…

I (M29) am struggling to rebuild after my (F28) partner cheated — My partner (F) and I (M) have been together for years and have two young kids (3 and 1). A while ago I found out she had been talking to another guy behind my back. When I confronted it, she said it w…

I know checking their profile will hurt me… and I still do it anyway — I don’t even want to do it anymore… but I still do. It’s like my brain just takes over for a second. I’ll be fine, doing something else, and then suddenly I’m typing their name without even thinking…

Got hurt, tried to heal, got dumped because I didn't heal fast enough. — I F22 was on and off with my now ex"boyfriend" M21 for almost a year (never made it to girlfriend status) and I’m really struggling to make sense of how things ended. Right before Valentine's day, we…

Looking into the Abyss — ​ For 15 years I lived with a man I considered responsible, honest, hardworking, and who loved me in a profound way, so profound that even facing unemployment, financial setbacks, what I thoug…

Manifesting Money — Hi everyone! Wanted to ask: I'm doing great with self concept recently, but I noticed some of that chest tightening anxiousness or nervousness around money. I have my own business and it's pretty st…

Could he be actually cheating? — 27y/o (F) 35y/o (M) married for 7 years, 2 kids (preschool and 7m baby) tested positive during prenatal screening for syphilis both unsure where from? Got treated during pregnancy, I’ve lost basically…

All these thoughts. What do you even do with them? — I didn’t realize how this was going to change so much for me. Internally. The not trusting of others. The constant questioning others intentions. The fear of being left behind. Fearing who and what yo…

What's something your parents did to you that YOU had to apologize to them for that still makes you angry? — As in, situations where despite you being the victim, you were forced to be the one apologizing. I know mine too well, unfortunately. I've told this in comments before, but now I'll tell it here. So…

Success Story: "I make $55/hr" 2 week streak F20 — To preface, I've had the knack for manifesting money here and there for around 5 years now, and I'm still in the process of fully realising my power and being in total control (ie having it come more …

need help from an educated birth chart reader to interpret my chart — I have A LOT of aspects to explore. The overall theme of my life feels like ongoing depression when dealing with family & friends. Both of my parents have mental issues and divorced after 34 years of …

To a younger me - it’s not your fault — You couldn’t have known. You couldn’t have stopped it. You are pretty enough, you are smart enough, you are enough. I am so, so sorry. The whole thing was a trick - I think he even tricked himself. He…

This is pivotal for getting over your Ex — I got over my Ex by: 1) Forgiving him 2) Forgiving myself And I mean, TRULY forgiving. Fully coming to peace with it. 3) Rewriting the story I rewrote the story for how everything worked out …

Seek no approval — When we go to imagine, we have to drop the judgements and opinions others hold. Some people will tell you "Well, you have to do this" and others might say "You can't do that!" or "We do it like this".…

How do you learn to trust after narc abuse? — I’ve posted before in BPDlovedones but I am starting to see similarities in my experience and the folks on this sub. I was with my partner for 7-8 years, then separated for 3 but we’ve maintained so…

Should I try and reconcile or is the writing on the wall? — 35 M, married 12 years, 4 kids. We’ve had a lot of circumstantial challenges but I really believed our love and connection was solid. Last year an old flame reconnected with her, they met up (withou…

Please give me a piece of advice — they’re making me think I’m crazy — Hi everyone, I’m (29M) reaching out because I feel completely stuck in a pretty toxic family situation and could really use some perspective. I grew up in a very traditional household where "respect …

My peculiar version of ladder experiment + how I manifest effortlessly — This is gonna be long, but worth the read. I've been consciously manifesting for years with lots of successes but recently fell off my mental diet a bit (bc I'm human, ayo 😂) so was recommitting to…

Money manifestation experience (4 years) — Im going to keep it short because I like to talk a lot but it gets really confusing hahaha For the last 4 years, I’ve been dealing with a debt that just increased every month like a snow ball, i coul…

Hi there, i know it's only been a day, but are there any updates? Reading this, i feel a pit in my stomach for you and hope that he's just busy. It's almost like getting the news that someone you love…

I think you answered your own questions. You crossed an unspoken boundary. Most likely something trust related? This is a deep core wound for DAs as trusting someone with emotional vulnerability isn’t…

A big part of healing is facing the fact you don't trust anyone and leaning into it by trusting someone, such as a therapist. There are books you can read. The main thing is  learning emotion regulati…

No. The point is to develop a real trusting HUMAN attachment. That's what repairs. AI is imaginary projection. It's the opposite of what we need to do to heal attachment trauma.

Attachment issues aren't medicated: source I work with people with insecure an attachment. Psychologists/ therapists don't prescribe medications anyway, at best they can give you a referral to a psych…

My simplified view (derived from a ton of research with about 80 finished books on AT, Trauma, Neurochemistry, Therapy, Mindfulness, etc) is that until one has awakened to own insecure attachment and …

Hi! Yeah! Now that should just feel like a truth to you that you are in a wonderful relationship. Let go of the fear and doubt and let in peace. Trust all that you want is on the way or your already. …

Okay, this is long and it might sound harsh, but I relate to a lot of what you're going through and acted much in the same way as you did, and I've gone from anxiously attached within a friendship to …

I like a lot of what you said and have lived that scenario and yes, the best thing is to act normal once the conflict has been resolved. One thing I don’t know if I agree with is trusting words over a…

Im healing FA myself and my unaware FA avoidant leaning did this all the time. She was hard people pleaser aswell and when time passed i couldnt trust anymore what she said to me. I really understand …

Yes I understand, but sometimes this need to step away happens in the middle of a date or some kind of quality time, so it feels weird and rejecting to ask for space during those moments. I also don…

One thing that helped me is actively trying to date multiple people at a time because it meant there was a lot less pressure on the one, and I had less to lose. I also think that what people say about…

Yes, that makes sense. I think we may be experiencing two different things honestly. I’m a very open communicator and will tell someone if I’m not comfortable sharing if they prompt me. My experiences…

I frankly don't speed up. I believe in keeping patience and trusting the process So, I don't know if speeding up the process is possible or not.

I had to read your post about this same topic in another sub to get more context, so that way I could provide more specific advice. A lot about what you are dealing with is perspective and the narr…

Thank you so much for this detailed reply. It honestly feels like you are in my brain because every single thing you brought up is just so accurate. I truly feel heard and seen, so thank you. Just rea…

I appreciate that, nice to have encouragement!!  My sister is in a fight for her life, but making some incremental progress everyday... and thankfully I do have good friends & family around me as a su…

Great list. Good job putting in the work. Regarding rebuilding trust in relationships, and trusting myself in relationships coda promise 7 is my fav. > I am capable of developing and maintaining heal…

What I'm going to say is not going to sound intuitive at all and is going to be scary, but it's honestly one of the practices and shifts I made that has led me to being secure. It took a lot of therap…

You're on the right path, I also went through this stage (distrusting my gut feelings, because I had become aware my gut wasn't as reliable as I had thought!). I suggest trauma work (EMDR, tapping, so…

Text of original post by u/rkuchiki123: I'm sure others can relate to this, but whenever I start dating someone, I look for signs that they don't actually like me. Things like "he took hours to text b…

I don’t have advice but you perfectly worded one of my main struggles in dating and relationships in general especially the fear of never trusting anyone and just always being so picky and particular …

I do do the cognitive restructuring, like reminding myself of all the things my partner has done to show care. It helps in the moment but like I said, once we break up I wonder if I should've listened…

I struggled with the same issue, and what helped is to realize that not everything is personal. I think that's a part of anxious attachment (or at the very least, something that worsens it): making na…

I'm curious, are you staying to avoid triggering your fears of abandonment or because your partner is emotionally dependent on you? You might want to look into codependent relationship patterns either…

Healing is a long process and therapy can cause a lot of confused feelings. Also, because people start to feel better than they ever felt, they might assume that they healed way before they actually d…

I usually just try to focus on something or write down my feelings if it's too overwhelming. I don't really know why I'm like this, but I do tend to take a little while before feeling fully trusting a…

A secure person probably wouldn't even think about their partner in that instance and just live their life, fully trusting that he'll return. But, if they do think about their partner having a good ti…

Damn that sucks. This and many other stories and experiences are why I can never have a completely secure attachment. Because I’m not stupid. Trusting your partner completely doesn’t mean they’re not…

after posting this i found out that they were lying about how they felt about me. they said they loved me (multiple times!) but didnt mean it, and actually thought we were moving too fast. which sucks…

I'm on the opposite side in the sense I've slept with people at hobby groups that I still see regularly and am still friends with. I have absolutely zero interest in sleeping with any of them ever aga…

I understand where you are coming from and I can understand your anxious behaviour coming about because of this. However, in order to help you feel more secure in yourself, trust yourself to let go. …

When i am experiencing something that is the opposite of what i desire. I let it for a day or two. When i first did it it lasts for a week up to 2-3 weeks. After sometime, that "bad feeling" lessen th…

I relate with so much of what you have written. For me, it's very similar in that it feels like an ever-present sense of calm or okayness. I think that there are two main feelings that I often have …

The signs are subtle, but they are there. In my experience, that's when you know, when it gets serious.  In my case, everything was great until we moved in together, then the mask came off.  There we…

dismissive avoidant and anxious preoccupied are more centred around a fear of abandonment. fearful avoidant tends to be more about fear of betrayal and rejection, they can look very similar but the tr…

I just have a few questions: 1. If you go out on a date with someone and it goes well, you have fun, and you find out the next day that they aren't interested in continuing seeing you -- was the date…

Text of original post by u/san7io: What do you think are some healthy ways to slowly trust someone again in a romantic context so if things go wrong it doesn't feel like moving on is like an impossibl…

Ok chiming in as earned secure: I don’t think secure attachment automatically means “no casual sex,” but I also don’t think casual sex is some kind of requirement or proof of security either. In my …

I think that this is kind of missing the forest for the trees. Working through attachment patterns doesn't prepare you to be able to tell if someone else is insecure/secure. Most of the time, someone…

Thank you, this helps. I keep getting stuck in the “too much” story. I’m trying not to "relapse" and I've slowly been trusting myself more and more by not checking if I'm blocked at all. I'm so glad y…

I'm making really stupid immoral decisions lately, and it's completely unlike me. The person I was a year ago (even a few weeks ago) wouldn't recognize me.  I tried really hard, but I'm so burnt out…

Keeping one foot out the door makes sense when you've been hurt before. It's protection. It's survival. But it also keeps you from ever fully landing anywhere. The fear of commitment isn't about the …

I have too. I was abused manipulated and cheated on by the two partners I had before my now partner. Been single six years before November bc that hurt crippled me mentally  Survived the death of a p…

I think it's kind of a pattern that plays out with lots of problems. When we see people we love suffering, we can't handle the reality that life is a crapshoot and so we come up with a different story…

Thank you for making me feel not abnormal or something like that, I truly appreciate it and it calms me down a little bit because I've been feeling very overwhelmed with all the aspects of my life I f…

Attachment therapist here- Your partner can’t fix your attachment strategy, but they’re not irrelevant either. DA organization is built on one core imprint: relationships aren’t reliable. So when som…

Trust. Holding multiple truths at once. He could leave at any time for any reason, and trusting that he will stay. Trusting that I don't have to fall apart if we do. Taking it day by day, step by step…

I'm really liking the communication I have with my boyfriend thusfar, there are some little concerns/conflicts but they're really easily smoothed and no actual arguments, just working together and bei…