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starved
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i see this in a lot of my clients and actually have a prewritten paragraph about it that im going to share here. one thing i can catch here is you hold an assumption that beinh anxious is delaying you…
Success Story: FA/Disorganized Attachment Healing Roadmap, Resource Recommendations — **Hello, fellow Fearful Avoidants! The below post has grown out of almost 3 years of research and healing this attachment style, which in my case was coupled with Relationship OCD (ROCD). ROCD is a vi…
Mom self harms in front of us since I was 8 yrs old. I haven’t been able to stop doing the same. — My mom would start beating herself whenever something tragic happened to her (failing an exam, fight w father etc.) or even because of me sometimes, she’d tell us (when my siblings and I were still ki…
I desperately need to be held. — I don’t know what to do. How can I cope with this emptiness? Will I truly never find someone to love me and hold me? I’m always afraid for myself when I feel like this because I don’t want to attract …
Crazy experience “timeline hopper” — I’ve been lucid dreaming since I was about 12/13, and I’m now 23. I trained myself into it years ago and now I lucid dream every morning which sometimes can be annoying because it affects my sleep. I’…
How to begin the “healing” — STBXW (33) and I (M33) had been having issues in our marriage since December. She eventually opened up and said she feels she doesn’t love me anymore. That broke me, but it felt like something we coul…
Calling AM on her bluff, even if it means she becomes homeless — \*\*\*\*Warning this contains Abuse, this is not for everyone if you’re under 18 please do not continue reading this. I’ll try to make it brief. My AM was a single parent of 5 kids. That’s where he…
Wish it had gone different — A few months ago I put myself out there after ending a very long marriage. Messaged with a guy a few years older, it turned sexual pretty quick. I hadn’t had anyone make me feel wanted, nor had I been…
MILD UPDATE: Struggling right now with feelings — Hey everyone. Don't have much of an update right now. I haven't forgotten about the comments or updating everyone as I can. I am personally going through a rough patch about our marriage. We really…
THE ONLY ANSWER TO ALL YOUR QUESTIONS! (manifestation and neville) // PART 1 — (YA'LL I DONE POSTED PART 2 AND 3 - GIVE IT A READ OR DONT -YOU DO YOU LOVELIEESSSS!) Alright now ! it's gonna be some tough love so take it that way.' Also it's gonna be one long post so imma need y…
THE ONLY ANSWER TO ALL YOUR QUESTIONS! (manifestation and neville) // PART 1 — (YA'LL I DONE POSTED **PART 2 AND 3** \- GIVE IT A READ OR DONT -YOU DO YOU LOVELIEESS) Alright now ! it's gonna be some tough love so take it that way.' Also it's gonna be one long post so imma need…
It’s been over 3 weeks. — My ex left me over 3 weeks ago, the first 2 weeks where hell. I had lost 12 pounds in those 2 weeks I literally starved myself and was very depressed but then I started to put all the good memories as…
I think i'm going about this healing stuff the wrong way. Relationship struggles... — ​ i regret ever opening up about my trauma, even to myself. but i think ignoring it for so long was the first mistake i made. im weird about sex and love. sometimes something goes wrong in my …
NC since christmas. got ambushed at easter. abuser parent showed her colors infront of family(socially), first time ever. need emotional support. (struggling to come to terms with MBP,/captivity /starvation abuse and abusers complete refusal to acknowledge) — to preface , id like to say some of my story/past (although, for those of u who are regular here im sure u have seen some of my olde rposts from 2 years ago) the easter incident will be at the bottom…
i think i was groomed, hes now working where i get therapy, im overwhelmed — a few months ago i was homeless due to fleeing dv and moved into a mental health group home. there was a team lead who acted weird: \- invited me to have frequent private conversations with him when …
Ngl y’all, I suspect my life is worthless. — Yes, I’m diagnosed with this hellhole of a disorder. I wanna talk but idk where to go. I ain’t had nobody to talk to fr since I’ve moved across the country which makes me depressed. I’m currently sic…
Deep guilt and shame when triggered? — I have severe CPTSD. I've survived years of medical abuse from a parent, incest CSA, narcissistic abuse from parents with addiction. I learned at an early age that lying kept me safe. It kept me from…
I’m going insane (rant) — I just got out of a 4 year relationship. I was sexually coerced for the first 2 and emotionally abused for the entire 4. My family is also abusive, so I have my mom cut off while my dad is in prison. …
I think what you’re describing is actually really common in anxious–avoidant pairings. You’re not crazy for how you reacted.Your nervous system was just trying to find safety, while his was trying to …
The faux-closeness besides trauma dumping has been cuddly roleplay, because my autistic brain interprets that as ”real” because of the distance (and I’m starved for cuddling, in an innocent way, with …
> The faux-closeness besides trauma dumping has been cuddly roleplay, because my autistic brain interprets that as ”real” because of the distance (and I’m starved for cuddling, in an innocent way, wit…
i keep isolating from everyone i know and staying up late to maximize alone time. i want really badly to be seen and be known but at the same time i feel suffocated. i’m scraping together every idea i…
Yes, I understand your point. My outlook is that nobody ticks all your boxes so compromise in a few areas is essential if you're mostly getting what you want in a partner. True, I tried to not get ahe…
I had a dream last night I was dating a woman I went on one date with last year. I decided I didn't want to continue seeing her in that context since she's so status/money focused. I sometimes run int…
I am honestly worried I won't find it. I've been in a lot of relationships at this point, and while things are getting better for me after making some changes to my approach, I do live with a history …
I'll go against what others are saying and say you should trust him on what he told you. Is he conventionally attractive and charismatic? If not particularly so, my guess is that he was starved for a…
I would say he’s unconventionally attractive—he looks like younger Paul Dano. He’s not exactly charismatic as he’s quite reserved and analytical. However, he is a good, stable guy with an interesting …
I'd say Lana del Rey is very good looking, just not particularly so for a famous pop singer, whereas Paul Dano is deep into niche taste territory; but I digress... If he wasn't starved for attention …
I didn't realize I was so touch starved that I almost blurted out "I love you" to my date last night after the second date... fortunately I stopped myself moments before disaster
>I started dating rather late, at 28, but since then I've been a major avoidant. Every time I find myself getting close to someone, I overthink it, and feel like I can find someone better. >Also, the…
So basically dating in 2026 is being ok with just sex and whatever crumbs of affection you can get, get stuck in a penpalship on dating apps or be starved of human touch and company forever. Ok got it
I think I must really be starved by loneliness, I'm starting to imagine things. The other day I woke up after napping in the train and think I found the woman sitting opposite of me staring at me. I a…
a way to ease into it is to try to give one stranger a compliment at some frequency (week, day, etc.). literally anyone. i try to do this daily mostly just to spread happiness and trust it gets so eas…
That's why I said it's silly to be now thinking of this, I know that very well. If I weren't so completely starved for attention I would probably just laugh it off. Even back then, I tried to use it m…
I had a really bad winter for dating. It was anxious, messy, and felt like compounding rejection. I took a break the last month and don’t plan on returning to dating for a bit, but idk it feels like…
Good observation. Same trend happened when Saturn was in Aries from 1967-69. That was also the rise of Twiggy and that ultrathin huge-eyed starved waif look. Margaret Keane's art was also popular th…
I am sending you virtual hugs! I struggle with very similar feelings. I’ve only had one physically intimate relationship, and it took me until I was 25. It ended very quickly, and ever since the…
Don’t stress what you can’t control. I would encourage you to start with the process of mourning the parents you never had and never will. You can move past it in a healthy manner and, should you c…
There actually are "cuddle groups" where I live, that are organized professionally. I have a depressive friend who was chronically touch starved after his wife left him, and I convinced him to try som…
You could also try social dancing. I used to blues dance when I was having a touch starved day.
So good to hear from someone that is happy after divorce. I am not there yet, still adjusting, but there are glimmers . It is great to hear( sounds like he was maybe an avoidant?) that after being emo…
This made me smile, honestly. Not because of what you went through, but because you can finally feel in your own body what it’s like to be wanted, enjoyed, and met instead of starved. There’s somethi…
I know exactly how you feel! We were roommates and good friends for most of our 15 year marriage. We separated almost three years ago, and honestly I felt like I had been released from prison. I had a…
Nobody is talking about how her husband has starved her of intimacy and that is not normal or sustainable. I agree cheating is wrong. She knows that. IMHO it is going to happen again unless the root…
I’m not condoning the affair but I understand it; being affection-starved, you went into someone else’s arms. Having sex two times in eight years with your husband, I probably would have strayed, mayb…
I actually was dumped out of the blue, so yes, that’s the perspective I was speaking from. But I’m not denying that being neglected and emotionally starved in a relationship hurts deeply too. That’s j…
I am very touchy touchy normally but since I have started using a heavy blanket, I haven't felt touch starved. It really helps me.
Have you considered a cat? They’re more low maintenance than dogs but still cuddly once they warm up to you. Or if you get a kitten you can get it used to being picked up and such, but kittens can be …
That's the thing. He's open to it but what if you meet a girl and 5 months into dating her she says... "I had a cuddle buddy the first few times we were on a date because I was physically starved of h…
Personally, I’m a “hugger.” I’m known in my circles (among men and women) for giving good hugs. Some men get giggly and come up to me for a big one. I like getting good hugs and you have to give them …
A year of dating: a retrospective Today marks the first anniversary of my divorce and my subsequent foray into dating apps. It was a challenging year, with a lot of frustration and a lot of growth,…
So, I (34m) would be cool with a girl I was seeing, if she had had a cuddling buddy. I am touch-starved too, and 10 years in the Navy, where touching other people is highly frowned upon (ymmv), has ma…
Is this a new thing, or have I just not been paying attention? Every single profile Bumble has shown me in the past few days has "Open to seeing where things go" listed in their looking for. They sti…
This!!! He was giving me forehead kisses, stroking my hair, and holding me... I know I'm pretty touch starved, but I it really made me think we both felt pretty strongly about each other
I agree with you up to the point where you say that it doesn't matter what religion it is that you believe. But that belief, or focused mental cognition can influence outcomes. There is absolutely som…
The only thing I regret is that the worst possible sibling was left in charge of the end of life care and starved my parent to death. They did not deserve that.
I fawn really badly. A huge part of this for me is just masking my moods. Oh, you only like me if I’m cheerful and smiling? Guess how I automatically present, even when I’m screaming on the inside? I …
When someone shows you who they are, believe them. I'm all for taking things slowly, but rejecting hugs after four months should ring alarm bells. Having gone through intimacy-starved relationships,…
You brought it up to him too. And you even hugged him. That's crazy. >Do I stick it out or end it? Have a conversation with him about feeling touch starved and sexually frustrated (yea I think after…
OP do you have much time at either of your houses or places with proper privacy? Where you have complete privacy and ideally you can leave if you want to My ex was affectionate at the start but i…
I understand that you feel hurt and frustrated. But honestly if all was going so well why you and the girl had only 1 date in 3 weeks? I would have starved. If you both really liked that much the firs…
> I've tried hugging, but he responds to it in such a way that it feels like a rejection every time I try Ugh. Do you want a friend or a partner? For me touch is so important. Something me & my late …
What if I’m unhappy and I can pinpoint some major reasons as related to being unhappy in my marriage? We each have very different needs. I need and have been starved for social connections, intimacy…
I think community and third spaces are extremely lacking. I guess manosphere sounds singular. Warrior sounds singular too. Anyone with a microphone can create little armies of men and radicalize them …
If you were on the floor after being choked and he was yanking you back to your feet, he knows you passed out. Your choice of words “blacked out” vs “passed out” doesn’t make a difference, and means t…
Ugh, I feel this so hard. Physical touch is my main love language too, and the idea of going back to being touch-starved is genuinely terrifying. Honestly, finding ways to get that comforting closenes…
From every one of my guy friends, I honestly think its because we are not prepared for the question. Like I know why I love my SO, and if I sat down and put it into words it would be a bit before I co…
I don't disagree with your critiques, including the ones in your reply below, but ultimately KPDH is a movie aimed at kids. You could probably find similar plot holes or questionable themes in any kid…