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Citations (100)
THINGS TOXIC "SHIFTERS" SAY/DO (they are more normalized than you think) — Soo days back I made a post voicing frustrations about my shifting experience and mentioning a few a of my roadblocks. Two days ago I shifted successfully to the Odyssey and when I came back to my cr…
Offering Options to offshore engineer. I will not promote — I have a startup. obviously. anyhow, my company is in Canada. I have this developer in Vietnam, and he is pretty good! I pay him decently for his hours, but as a founder, I feel like i want to offer …
Should I hide my plugins in WordPress for safety? And how? — Hey folks, I've been thinking about WordPress security lately and came across this question: **Should I hide the plugins I'm using on my WordPress site to improve safety?** I’m not talking about u…
How can I let devs update their lower environment terraform while protecting production environments? — I know the title is a rather open ended question, but let me lay out where I am now, in the hopes of getting ideas on how to do this better. For a given service, we'll have one directory for environm…
Every day I try to do things right. Every day they say no. Now I duct-tape and maintain the mess I warn them about — Hey folks, Just wanted to drop this little gem of corporate masochism So I work at this company where we develop software for real state agencies, in this 'properties' sql table we have a field cal…
The right way to highlight text on elementor without plugins — https://youtu.be/1WZkNkP-Kjo?si=QM6N1jEcAcKUek0O
A message to earnestly curious skeptics and non-experiencers: How to engage experiencers within this community and learn about the topic. — We are seeing an increase of activity from people outside of experiencer circles in threads as time has moved on and more and more people are starting to understand there really is a "there there" and…
Master’s degree, big scholarship, and leaving a toxic situation — Background: I was keen to leave my toxic family situation for years but let’s just say it wasn’t happening. I got a good job in my hometown, I found someone I loved who was desperate to marry me, I …
learning to trust with new potential partners — What do you think are some healthy ways to slowly trust someone again in a romantic context so if things go wrong it doesn't feel like moving on is like an impossible task emotionally? I don’t mean t…
Wife cheated on me with multiple men over the course of 3 months. — Me (31m) found out this past December that my wife (27f) had been talking to as many as 20+ people on Snapchat (non nude but inappropriate photos, sexting, ect.). I confronted before new years by tell…
I’m 19 and left with a 4yo autistic sister. I feel extremely hopeless. — I’m 19f, my mom passed away November 2025 and Im left with a 5year old neurotypical sister and 4 year old sister diagnosed with autism, ocd, and adhd. My sisters and I have different fathers, their fa…
Don’t you fear being too isolated? — I recently got rejected by a girl that I really liked. We started off as very good friends and unfortunately I caught feelings for her. So right now, I’m grieving the fact that I lost a really close f…
Is the hardest breakup the one where love was never the problem? — I’ve been thinking about a certain kind of breakup that feels particularly difficult to process. The kind where the relationship didn’t end because there was no love but because one person couldn’t s…
What if we could use Depression? — I had depression for 16 years, and one thing that helped me was shifting the perspective on it, Instead of seeing depression as anything else other than just a black hole that sucks everything thats…
I just don't know anymore — why do i always feel like that i need validation. i mean i make my own decisions but i always doubt my decisions, overthinking whether it is right or wrong. when i fail at something, i know just the t…
Unstable/ Uneven relationship [29F] and [27F] — Me and my girlfriend have been together about 3 years now. When we first starting dating it was long distance, I would go visit her every month. She worked a good job, getting a least 5-6 days a week.…
Plain "lost feelings" or might she be an avoidant?! — We were together eight weeks. No conflicts, no issues. She was fully invested, she initiated equally (or even more), said "I love you" first after one month, made future plans for the summer and easte…
I’m stuck — I’m currently going through a break up while being with someone else. I know this sounds horrible but I just broke up with my boyfriend of over a year about 3 months ago. He was a cheater, liar, and s…
I (M29) am struggling to rebuild after my (F28) partner cheated — My partner (F) and I (M) have been together for years and have two young kids (3 and 1). A while ago I found out she had been talking to another guy behind my back. When I confronted it, she said it w…
How I’ve helped myself the last 2 months — So after 5 years together, me (29M) and my now ex gf (28F) split up and it went very cordial and respectful to one another. I will say that she was the person in my life for the period we shared toget…
Boyfriend’s ex — So me (19 F, chinese) and my boyfriend (18 M, mongolian) has been dating for 7 months but i can’t stop thinking about his past relationship (they dated for 2 years) this made me depressed, binge eat, …
Well, she's gone. [trigger: death] — I posted here maybe six months ago about my terminally ill Nmother, and how my brother and I were navigating that situation. Well... here's how it went. In efforts to preserve my brothers sanity, I e…
An open letter to my wife — I want her to know this but I know it wouldn't be healthy so I'm writing it here because if 1 person sees it then maybe I will feel seen. To my 'wife', When we met we were smitten with each other. …
I ruined my relationship with jealousy and clinginess, is there any way back? — We broke up in March because I struggled a lot with jealousy and became too clingy, especially around her male friends. She told me she couldn’t handle my insecurity anymore and ended things. After th…
Long distance girlfriend(27F) is overwhelmed with work and life but our communication has almost disappeared idk if I(26M) am wrong for feeling hurt what do I do? — I (26M) am in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend (27F) for almost 6 months now. Earlier, we used to talk every day mostly on calls, and we’d text here and there during the day. Since we d…
Read this if you're miserable and want your ex back. — # Your ex won't come back until you've COMPLETELY let go of them. ...and it's not gonna take 30 days of No Contact. I wish it was that simple. Let me explain how I've come to this conclusion while …
is it possible to manifest my vision problems away?? — asking because ive been trying for months on end and nothing has improved 😢 im wondering if im doing it wrong?? any help is appreciated \^\^ ive been trying to see if i could manifest my corneas be…
SC middle school teacher made a racist comment in class! — A teacher made a comment in class suggesting that **Chinese people eat cats and dogs**. This was said publicly, in front of students. I reported it immediately to the principal. Instead of addressing …
After many failed attempts for me (31M) to change, my wife (30F) of 7 years has suggested divorce. I want to be better. — My wife and I have been married for 7 years and together for 10. We’ve had our ups and downs throughout but the past few years I have pushed her to her breaking point and she has suggested legitimatel…
My (21F) bfs (24M) mother thinks I'm not the right girl. — To give context, me and my bf have been together for almost a year, our relationship is great and we love each other dearly. we've also met each others parents, my parents like him and think hes a goo…
Should I divorce — After a night of discussion because I went on the t mobile app to see if I could upgrade my husbands phone I saw that some text messages were deleted but were registered on the T-Mobile app. We argued…
Please help — I’m going through a separation with my wife and honestly just trying to make sense of what’s happening. We’ve been married less than 4 years. A few weeks ago she told me she was done and asked me to…
I ruined my relationship with jealousy and clinginess, is there any way back? — Here's the actual post: https://www.reddit.com/r/BreakUps/s/66OsVZaAlI (His situation is similar to mine, but the only helpful comment he got didn't reply to any questions) I ruined my relationship …
I (m23) have a crush on my good friend and lab partner (f26) — tldr: I have a crush on my friend and lab partner, but I dont want to ruin the friendship and/or the research. I met this girl in uni, and we have been great friends. We like the same things, finish …
(21F) mi sono messa da poco con un ragazzo (27M) che ha un fetish per la morte — Qualche giorno fa gli ho chiesto perché gli piace così tanto stringermi il collo (strangolarmi) e lui ha risposto un po' a fatica all'inizio perché non lo aveva mai messo a parole. Ha detto che ha un …
I (22F) broke up with my ex (23M) after he cheated and said he was never “excited” about me… but I still believe he loved me and that’s what’s messing me up — I (22F) broke up with my ex (23M) two months ago, and I feel like I’m stuck between two completely different truths that I can’t reconcile. For context, we’re both medical students and were flatmates…
Am I wrong on this — TL;DR; : This is a sample summary of the TLDR rule, all things are bold. Is this going the right way?**. So my partner works with this girl who I had no problem with at all. She started bein…
No se que significa lo que me quiere dar a entender mi profesor 44M F18 — ​ Hace unos 3 años estaba en tercer año de prepa y tenia a un profesor de italiano , el daba las clases como siempre pero la verdad siempre sentí algo raro, algunas veces que llegué temprano a…
19F and 21M am I reading into it too much? — We are almost three years in. Near the beginning of our relationship I had a friend who told me my bf was cheating on me and told me the name. Now back to current time. Last night I was looking throu…
Is there a right way to reach out to my (24M) ex (28F) after 4 years? — For a little context, I struggle to read social queues. It’s certainly a problem I’m aware of and working on, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have my problems. And part of the problem is that I genuinel…
Would you go or would you continue to stay and try to work through it? — I’ve been with my partner for 6 years, and I feel like I’ve done everything I can to help him get on his feet financially. One of the biggest reasons I’m going back to school for my master’s is to cr…
I’m 22 and my parents still expect me to only study and not go out at all…is this normal? — I (22F) feel really stuck and frustrated and I don’t know if I’m overreacting or not. My parents are extremely strict. I’m only allowed to go to college and come straight back. While I’m traveling I h…
Is no contact really the right thing if you still want them back? — I know no contact isn’t supposed to be about getting your ex back. I know it’s meant to help you heal and focus on yourself… but does it still leave a chance for things to work again? It’s been about …
Me (19M) and my girlfriend (19F) are falling apart. — Should we break up? So my girlfriend in the last maybe 5-6months has gotten weird. she is dry when texting, doenst send texts first and gets mad when i ask her why or that can she send texts first. S…
Thoughts on dad and step-mom situation — I’m not sure if this is the correct place to post this, but i didn’t know another place.. My parents have been divorced for over 8 years now , they both have a new partner. The situation is about my…
AIO about my gfs lies — Can I get some advice please. M30 F33z So I’ve been with my gf nearly a year now and she’s lied about some stupid things early on , things that weren’t even related to us and other things too that we…
Grandparents not following requests. — ​ I feel frustrated and annoyed that majority of the request I've made for my kids safety has been ignored by their grandparents. This would be my partner parents. I've requested my parents to…
My Cousin (37F) believes her unborn baby is the reincarnation of MY (26f) father — I (26F) lost my dad (58M) a few months back. It has been hard. My dad and I had a rocky relationship. He was never appreciative of us, always complaining and comparing us with others. Always angry and…
Radio Silence — I know I’m not owed a response or closure, but God, it’s tearing me apart inside. I’ve tried so hard to find some kind of emotional closure after the divorce. We’ve barely had any real conversations …
Broke up with my girlfriend of 8 years and I feel like the bad guy — I was with my girlfriend for 8 years, since high school. I loved her deeply. I’ll never forget how she saw the world — the way she expressed herself, her hobbies, her goofiness. We went through a lot …
I read this post as I was at lunch, I was sitting and thinking about a new scene for a mission I will do - and it involves a big airballoon. Out of nowhere this college walks in and says ”have u guys …
Even if you're doing the right steps and apply it the right way, and doing that daily, it will take more time if you're new and working on a tough first mission. The lion states 4 months. If you haven…
There is no single right way to do it. The right way is deciding which tools work for your workflow, and provide the least administrative overhead. Whatever helps you not copy and paste things all the…
I enjoyed what everyone enjoys in a relationship I think, I don't know what you mean by "micro-level", do you mean on our day-to-day? The points where I deactivated were usually when he was critical i…
I am AA, he is displaying avoidant behaviours. I don't want to speculate on his attachment style, I can only work off of what he says and does. The honeymoon phase was fast and intense, and it ended …
I really hope I can find some answers here about why I’m unable to let go of and forget one person. The breakup was unbearably painful, drawn-out, and emotionally exhausting. I spent years chasing an…
Text of original post by u/san7io: What do you think are some healthy ways to slowly trust someone again in a romantic context so if things go wrong it doesn't feel like moving on is like an impossibl…
Well, people are giving them to you and you kinda keep pushing back. Just like the therapist is. Not every way is going to be the right way for you but you can’t just jump ship or get your back up eve…
Ok yeah I see. It's a balancing act and different with everyone I meet. My ex was abusive and my last date who asked what went wrong in the relationship I hesitated and then just said "he was a dick"…
My friend in her 40s has a rule against dating someone less than 2 years after separation, and a year after divorce final, and they must have gone to therapy, because it drives people crazy. There c…
I am in a new relationship off of hinge. 3 months in. This is after being single for 6 years and on the apps for a solid 4+ years with little to no success. My last relationship I was 22 and 23/24 ye…
Had an unexpected conversation last night with the guy I've been seeing regularly for a little over a month. I feel like we're establishing a good connection but then he did nothing for Valentines (to…
That's kinda how I feel about it too. There's this really good quote/piece by Jim Carrey about grief. Kinda makes it a nice thing. But my main take away from it is theres no right way to grieve, and w…
This is the right way to handle these situations. Take the high road not many like this out there. It’s bad enough ending relationships but then taking stuff and not returning is an even worse feeli…
I relate very much to the first paragraph. I had been convincing myself that if I left it long enough and then apologised again in the right way, I'm might be able to recover something of the relation…
this is the right way to see it, events and social clubs MUST never be treated like dating apps, it's about building connections and this only works in the long term
> I just wish it wasn't *that* slow. Oof yeah I get that. My current partner can be like a lot, but I find if I want to try to engage without feeling "rejected" if I dont' get a response right way i…
I’m a woman with adhd, and I think you’re going about this the right way! You’re screening out women who want/expect men to pay 100% of the time, and you’re setting a good tone of having open and hone…
I have a few different things to say in response: First, I should answer your direct question: # What is Kindness I'd say that's just a semantic thing. The real question is what you think is the ri…
I want to say as a man that it’s a human thing. It can be somebody who has had their ego hurt by breakup so the act that way, somebody who is avoidant, somebody who can’t heal properly and move on the…
Letting go is the hardest thing. It’s so painful, and there is no right way to do it. We just gotta do it somehow. Do you know a movie called Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind? Wish we could just …
I think there’s two things to consider on this topic… For one, being an experienced shifter doesn’t only mean “fully” shifting and spending a long period of time in your DR. Some people (myself inclu…
BOB: I tried to shift using sleep paralysis and hypnopompia and it did not work JAKE: I tried to shift using sleep paralysis and hypnopompia and it did work JOHN: I tried to shift using only inte…
As someone who experienced a LOT of what you went through and in your shoes- I can’t tell you what to do but I will tell you what I did and what I learned. You cannot fake intimacy and vulnerability …
Thanks for your clarification. It wasn't that long ago when I felt nobody could possibly understand what I was going through. I can't tell you where I found people who understand what this feels lik…
>*you* are the one deciding you are not "good" and *you* are the one deciding that your partner doesn't deserve what you are offering. I did not decide this. After 5 years of saying "I love you" to e…
I’m very truly sorry for what you went through. I’m sorry she didn’t leave you with any closure. That wasn’t fair of her. Being blindsided is devastating. I know this is a very sensitive topic for s…
I wrote a long comment but I deleted it cuz it's too long to understand tbh. I'll just put it like this A post complaining about the subreddit will get hundreds of upvotes routinely. As long as that …
I waited three years before I was ready to try again, but I was very skeptical but Mostly because my feelings were almost completely numbed. After we broke up I swore I was never gonna get into anothe…
Yeah, it's a common thing people like to push here because it feels good (and perhaps because technically there is some truth to it... technically anybody in the world can become enlightened in a sing…
And it’s ok to let people go too but you have to take responsibility for standing up for yourself in the right way first. Say what you mean and mean what you say.
How do some of you people exist in this world with actual zero awareness 😂 yes everyone grieves and heals differently but there are right ways to do it and wrong ways you do not heal after a relation…
Don't worry so much on getting a diagnosis. Going in and telling the doctor what you believe you have ect isnt the right way to go. Focus on the healing and strategys that can be provided with therapy…
I would just take what she says at face value and respect her boundaries. She has anxiety and a history of trauma, I can tell you that trying to push back on that or figure her out or you know find th…
That is the reason behind much of what people like this do. They have an uncomfortable feeling, and as they are emotionally immature and dysfunctional, they decide to make it someone else's problem. A…
A lot of people get "saved" because they are reaching a rock bottom and there aren't very many venues that are freely eager to take you in and also offer you the idea that your life is out of control…
how do i know im healing, what way is the right way?
Again, the consequence of doing that in the wrong way would be we have an argument over it and she still doesn’t get it checked, which is why I’m asking for advice on how to do that the right way Be…
What happens if you do it the right way and she still refuses? I had a persistent cough and had cancer. That was my symptom. Do you find that information helpful or something that is useful to use i…
What bothers me especially here is that those are special needs birds. If you give them up, who knows who is going to get them and if they’ll care for them the right way. You’re a good person and you …
So, what exactly is detachment? I'm new to this aspect of manifestation. I'm manifesting someone I know, and I'm currently in a phase where I'm not as obsessive as I was before. I'm trying to internal…
Damn, OP, that hits hard, in all the right ways. Made me tear up honestly. Growing up, I thought my mom was my safe parent - the fun one, the one who actually cared - and that we were both survivors…
More male hatred. You know this is going to backfire massively right? All this hate against men, this is not the right way to address the actual problems, but that's not the point is it?
You could start by referring to yourself with a more empowering term than 'foster girlfriend'. That term sort of seals your fate as your energies are trained towards looking at work-in-progress men ra…
On the other side of the same coin, they think that when you say, "no", that this is because of some reason they can overcome, like asking the right way, or doing you a favor. These are the sneaky kin…
Apart from anything else, that's an insane amount of money to spend on those procedures. Unless she has scheduled full-blown surgery, like a face-lift or nose job or whatever, there's really no way bo…
Forgive me for my hypocrisy but i personally view it as a moral issue to be able to get absolutely whatever you want/manifest. The lack of what you want brings pain and where there’s pain there’s grow…
That’s cool, I never really looked at that sub. I’m at a stage where I mostly feel fine, so sometimes I even feel like a fake here. Notable CPTSD symptoms rarely arise, and when they do, they fade muc…
> I understand stoicism is living life with only what you can control, but I feel I’ve seen a lot of people post and comment in a way that seems like they’ve fully detached themselves from having emot…
I think it’s good she’s admitting she’s overwhelmed bc it tells you that she is no longer thinking straight basically. It is what it is on some level. Therapists are human so we all have our limits or…