Realistic

THINGS TOXIC "SHIFTERS" SAY/DO (they are more normalized than you think) — Soo days back I made a post voicing frustrations about my shifting experience and mentioning a few a of my roadblocks. Two days ago I shifted successfully to the Odyssey and when I came back to my cr…

Long road to dream job and instant healing. — Bestcub called me to write this, I hope it will be helpful to someone. A story like many others. After years of wandering around shitty loa and other stupid spheres, books and forums I finally start…

My Keyword Research Workflow — Hi guys, I wanted to check with you if my keyword research workflow canbe improved. Here's how I've been doing: Finding general keywords: Google Trend: Look the best variation of a generic keyword…

Feeling stuck between a promo and burnout - advice? — I'm approaching 5 years at my current company (2 years as junior, 3 as mid-level) and am submitting a promotion case for Senior. I won't hear back for a couple months - my director feels optimistic, b…

Freelance in SEO or full-time remote job: Am I making a mistake by still applying? — Hey everyone, I’m at a bit of a crossroads and could really use your advice—even if it goes against what I’m currently thinking. Since I was 18 (I’m 20 now), I’ve been building websites just for fun…

Freelance in SEO or full-time remote job: Am I making a mistake by still applying? — Hey everyone, I’m at a bit of a crossroads and could really use your advice—even if it goes against what I’m currently thinking. Since I was 18 (I’m 20 now), I’ve been building websites just for fun…

Anyone here need GoHighLevel sub account for just 6$? Pay After Activation — **GHL can do everything for you that you can think of whether you are a business owner, Agency owner or website designer that too very easily, just ask** ✅ If you are a "Website developer/Designer" -…

Offered Technical Cofounder Role — How Much Equity Should I Ask For? [I will not promote] — I initially joined a startup as a developer, building the product from scratch — no existing codebase, no tech team, just me & one junior developer. After a few months of work, the founder has now off…

Anyone here need GoHighLevel sub account for just 7$? Pay After Activation — **GHL can do everything for you that you can think of whether you are a business owner, Agency owner or website designer that too very easily, just ask** ✅ If you are a "Website developer/Designer" -…

How long does it realistically take to put together an enterprise product case study? — Finding myself on a job hunt again (the company announced restructuring). I am working on putting together the latest case studies for my portfolio, along with my day job. Wondering how long it t…

Common sense from an actual founder [fully boostrap 10M$ company] about startup studios' playbooks [i will not promote] — I don't post on reddit but I've recently seen an increased influx of post or people talking about X or Y playbook about how you should startup. i will not promote Let me get this straight, I won't cr…

Anyone here need GoHighLevel sub account for just 6$? Pay After Activation — **GHL can do everything for you that you can think of whether you are a business owner, Agency owner or website designer that too very easily, just ask** ✅ If you are a "Website developer/Designer" -…

Aspiring Dance Studio Owner - First Steps? — ~ TL;DR: Aspiring dance studio owner (currently in school). Active in the dance community and planning ahead. Looking for first-step advice, financial tips, and mindset guidance from other small busi…

Being a parent exposed everything bad about running a small business — Before kids, I founded and ran a small food delivery business for 5 years. It was locally loved, I had a steady stream of orders, and from the outside, it looked like freedom. But then I had my first…

Afraid of the "how" — Hi to all. I have been studying the law and this sub since many years, then left, then (1-2 months ago) came back. I had my fair share of watching coaches, reading the content proposed here (and more)…

I need some FA to give me insights on this situation — Break up with a FA need some insights Hi guys, i really need some insights as someone whos desire is to be a safe space for a FA girl. Breakup context: I (M, 23) was in a 2-year relationship with my…

For those hurting, advice for your 2026 and my story — Hello everyone, **Preface** I am an anxious attacher, so my experience by-and-large is with dismissive avoidants and fearful avoidants. It is not my intent to villainize these attachment styles; thi…

How does the process look transitioning from dismissive avoidant to secure? — I'm 44 and have slowly worked out there's something up with me, to finding out about this term and seeing a lot of myself in fellow sufferer's description of it. My life is full of unrealistic expe…

Announcement - Important Update on Bot Advertisements — Hello, all! We hope you're having all a lovely start to the new year. Recently, there has been a noticeable increase in subtle ads and a bot campaigns. It is explicitly against our rules to post pr…

Attachment in someone with no relationships? — Wondered this for a long time so it's oversharing hours tonight. I basically don't have relationships. I've overly attached with my mom, possibly even enmeshed, but that's it, and there's a lot of du…

Trying to navigate a "casual" relationship — Hi everyone, I (30F, trans) have been talking to/seeing a woman (24F, cis) for about 5 months. The chemistry is legitimately the strongest I’ve ever experienced - emotional, intellectual, creative, s…

Specific Person (SP) Manifestation: No Magic, No Supernatural Forces. Just Proven Science — Hi everyone, It’s been a long time since I last posted, and honestly it was overdue. I keep seeing the same recycled LOA bullshit everywhere. Endless manifestation porn, more unqualified people calli…

Why Manifestation can FEEL Forced and Unrealistic (Success & Guidance) — Today I came upon a realization that many people do not have for most of their lives. It was the realization that our feelings and the meanings that we attach to them are also affirmations. Right no…

Married 5 months after 10 years together (M32 / F29) — she started talking to another guy right after the wedding. We’re now on a 30-day separation and I don’t know what to do. — I’m looking for honest advice from people who have either been through something like this or have perspective I might not be seeing right now. My wife (F29) and I (M32) have been together for about …

Where to go from here — Just to warn you, this is a long one... For context, my partner (F39) and I (M40) have been together for 17 years, have two kids together. This all started in early January but seems to have been goi…

is this common — i get a random gusp of tiredness like say i was on the train then feels like i close my eyes for a few secends and have a really realistic dream for a few secends with like voices and things

Manifested work and a promotion — I've been a silent lurker here for a while, and for some reason I couldn't manifest small things like idk, seeing a pink elephant. I felt like I was trying so hard, forcing myself to see that pink ele…

I (28F) care deeply about my fiancé (28M) but feel like the romantic connection has faded after years of imbalance. How do you know when it’s truly over? — From a burner account. I’m looking for some perspective because I feel like I’m at the end of a long internal process and I don’t know if I’m being unfair or if this is just the reality of where my re…

Beware of taking back the ex that broke up with you and wanted to rekindle with you — Let this be your testimony that you are much better without them. My ex of 7 years and I rekindled after a couple months of no contact. She broke up with me cause she said she relied on me too much an…

My (F28) partner (M28) gave me an ultimatum: him or my birds. Idk what to do — Hi everyone, I could really use some outside perspective. I (F28) have been in a relationship with my partner (M28) for about 3 years. I love him a lot and I genuinely imagined a future with him. We …

Manifested a $32K scholarship with accidental SATS!!! — Hi all :) I have a pretty amazing success story that I’d love to share, and I hope it may motivate some of you in your manifestation journeys 😊 Basically, I accidentally manifested a $32,000 scholar…

My Personal Key For Shifting (Repost because my pther account got deleted somehow 😢) — Lets start with i accidently shifted in early 2000s, before I even knew what I was, or understood what it was, I just passed it off as a very realistic dream. And just to put it out there, i am very s…

What We Really Need To Heal — Not sure if anyone else feels this way: but I'm kinda over all the "healing" stuff. Because it doesn't work. And I think there's too much pressure on survivors to "heal". The only way that we can …

Finally admitting I have an attitude of entitlement. — Need to get this off my chest: I’m realizing that at 35, I’ve spent a lot of my life operating with a mix of entitlement and a victim mentality. The short version is that growing up, I had a lot of t…

What can I do when my (20F) husband (20M) is convinced I cheated on him because I’m pregnant again and refuses to listen to me. — Me (20F) and my husband (20M) both just turned 20. We have a baby boy who just turned 1 in January. We had been dating in high school for 2 years and I found out I was pregnant in May of our senior ye…

I finally figured out how to manifest — For context I’ve been manifesting for a really long time. I’ve taken this lifestyle up for over 5 years. But it used to be tough to know exactly what I’ll get and when I’ll get it in the past. I usual…

Ex-wife is adamantly opposed to me introducing anyone to the kids ever. Any advice? — My ex and I have been divorced for almost five years. In that time I’ve dated casually, but never seriously enough to introduce anyone to my kids. For the past year, though, I’ve been in a committed r…

Lived weeks of my life during a 2 hour nap — I had an extremely detailed dream of going on a cruise with a few members of my family (cousins who I usually spend free time with), and during the cruise I met and spoke to quite a few new people, ha…

Has anyone ever encountered a celestial feline presence either through experiences, meditation or dreams? This one spoke to me and told me I need to relax and stop stressing over my reality because it isn't real, it's just a learning experience. — This AI image I got from ChatGPT is so close to the experience that it creeps me out. It first appeared as my old cat, and as I was giving him love and affection he placed his paw on my forehead and I…

Anyone else unable to find others attractive (in a romantic sense) after a breakup? — Maybe this sounds ridiculous, but it's been almost a year and a half since my last breakup (which has mostly been no contact) and I'm still unable to find other women romantically attractive. Even whe…

Thinking More and More About Just *How* Boring They Were — One of the things that really boggles my mind looking back on my childhood is just how little my parents ever entertained any ideas of direction or progress within their own lives. My father worked t…

What instruments are people actually using for consistent home sound healing sessions that are not super expensive — I have been doing solo sound healing for about six months now but I keep switching between random apps and cheap bells that lose their tone after two uses. I want something that gives real vibrational…

Fear of being judged — Today I've messed up a tiny bit, catastrophizing a bit. I've just finished renovating my room with my parents. I love them and I've expressed that multiple times, and often times I feel it's reciproc…

I don’t know how it’s going to happen… but I feel like my life is about to change — I can’t explain this properly, but I feel like my life is about to change in a big way. I don’t have all the details. I don’t even know exactly where I’ll be living. But I keep getting this calm, gro…

New method *Forceful- lucid dream — When you got to sleep, close and then roll your eyes upwards and focus on the middle of the forehead and don't strain much but keep them there, don't let go until last moment, when you start drifting …

Has anyone looked into what chronic depression and trauma actually do to your body at a cellular level? The research is both terrifying and oddly empowering. — I've been down the research rabbit hole on this and wanted to share because it validates something many of us feel intuitively. Chronic depression and prolonged trauma responses don't just affect you…

[23M] gf [24F] wants my parents to be grandparents to her child, but they’re not open to it right now, should I end it? — I (23M) have been with my girlfriend (24F) for a year. We’re very compatible, great communication, and I can see a future with her. She has a 2-year-old from a previous relationship. I haven’t really…

Insecurity about my legs (genu varum) vs overall appearance - honest opinions? — Hey everyone, I’ve been dealing with some insecurity about my legs, specifically bowing (around \~8° varus). Do slightly bowed legs stand out a lot in real life, or is it mostly in my head? From y…

I need people to let me know if I should seek professional help — Hi, for my own privacy let me tell you that I am not an adult but I am not a child either. I have a small fear that I might have a psychotic disorder or I might do something bad later in life. In shor…

[Partner] Wife’s suppressed severe trauma surfaced. She’s in extreme ‘flight’ mode, refusing therapy, and I am burning out. Need honest outlooks. — \*\*Added some new context at the end Hi everyone. I’m hoping to find some perspective, hard truths, or shared experiences from those who have navigated severe PTSD/CPTSD dynamics. I am completely e…

There aren't many but as far as I can tell there are a couple which could qualify. 1. Escapism. Just like anything fun, let alone of the "reality substitute" type, there is the potential to use it e…

Hello I just had the weirdest dream and I don't know how to look up my specific type of dream and was so shocked I decided to come here and write. I remember going to sleep around 12:30pm after wakin…

Hi, that sounds like a false awakening chain. I've experienced a few of them too, including the annoying part where you lose lucidity each time the scenario "resets" itself. No idea what causes it, o…

I didn't even think it was something realistic

I discovered that both statements work equally, it probably depends on how accustomed we are to the statement I think. Specifically how well we experience the meaning of the words we use. If we can us…

Tbh you’re allowed to have your viewpoints but this is attention seeking behavior judging by your posts meant to get a reaction out of the people here. Also, why go on a Murphy sub for this? You alrea…

Yeah I've seen a lot of increase in those posts too. I don't think is the subreddit to tell everyone else that NC led you to get back with your ex, first of all is giving everybody false hopes or unre…

If it comes to new age stuff like LOA/LOB/Law of assumption I actually agree with you to a certain degree but not entirely. So let me explain where I disagree. Most people who follow Joseph Murphy, LO…

>So the formula that always works is: Getting to know yourself well + analyzing and understanding where your issues come from + realizing your weaknesses and what you need to change in your life + sta…

I feel you. I’ll give you my experience as a FA then suggestions. - I also transitioned from anxious to avoidant our the years. I was never full on AA but more anxious leaning FA as a child. Now I l…

I actually have my doubts that therapy is ***the*** key for most avoidants, myself. I've been in and out of therapy at different points since I was thirteen, and *yes* it has helped with different thi…

What have you done to resolve your fear of commitment, your emotional unavailability and the inferiority complex? Why are you searching for excitement from a partner? What does that mean to you? Is i…

By ‘phantom ex,’ I mean that the most recent crush is serving as an idealized image of someone they can never have, which makes it easier to compare others to this unrealistic standard. It’s common in…

I have anxious attachment but I get over people very quickly if I feel their interest wane. I think U could have a bit of romance/fantasy addiction. For people suffering that, they tend to fantasis…

My company is ready to pay reasonable price for the software we use and that provides value over FOSS ones. Unfortunately many companies go for crazy unrealistic pricing models and then complain that …

That, or it means you should properly plan a realistic business.

Something like 35% of entrepreneurs are suspected to have ADHD despite ADHDers being only 4.5~% of the population. Not fitting into normal job roles, setting unrealistically high goals, risk taking, …

You're not doomed, it just requires a lot of internal work. Being emotionally vulnerable can be hard when you're insecure because of how unsafe it feels, but that emotional vulnerability is what creat…

I think I get your point but I feel like we’re kinda talking about different things haha. All I’m saying is that to expect consistent communication from a partner that is working on their insecure att…

I get what you're saying with respect to people taking responsibility for their actions, but I think it's unrealistic to expect everyone to be at the same point in their healing journey as you are. If…

Before I say anything else, I want to say that there's no excuse for abuse, including emotional abuse. Ever. I'm sorry to hear you've experienced that. I also don't think an anxious person should sac…

The way this made me CACKLE after I clicked the headline. Thanks for that. It's kinda disgusting how much of a market there is for this type of advice. So many snakeoil salesfolks out there promisin…

I literally felt the same, and so needed a second opinion. Here's what Claude Opus 4 had to say (after copy pasting it): Why does this reddit post feel like an ad? My spidy sense is tingling: Yo…

I figured anyone mentioning it would get downvoted, but I second the use of ChatGPT and other AI tools. I did a couple years of weekly therapy but it was getting too expensive. Now I use a combination…

Everyone, including the anxious people, put their best foot forward at the beginning. Anxious people expect it to always stay the same as it is in the honeymoon and that’s unrealistic for both sides.…

Every post in this sub lately has been so aligned with what I struggle with! I'm FA inching toward secure, and I relate to this a lot. There are phases where I feel more resilient, but if one person c…

Realistically, 2 months isn't nearly enough time for someone to reflect AND implement what's needed to heal wounds, triggers or habits. So, likely... you'd be going back into the same situation. I hav…

If she’s shutdown at the moment then there’s no point in trying to talk. I think you can use this time to think about what you really want from a relationship and be realistic about whether she can gi…

This issue with this is that all this stuff is a spectrum that has no real quantifiable way of measuring. You can be an avoidant with secure tendencies that is working on themselves and is getting be…

Might not be realistic, but it is more ethical and empathetic.

How can it be more ethical if it's not realistic?

Regardless, I'm saying what youre offering is an unrealistic way for an avoidant to heal, and you're looking at avoidance and attachment theory in too binary a manner

Of course, you're welcome. It is painful and sobering to be grieving yet again for the same person after a tumultuous 3 years. I wish I had realised things wouldn't change even with therapy because un…

This was helpful, thank you. I just can't understand the avoidant. I thought we had turned a corner, but my FA (admittedly after a few arguments throughout the week) is now saying 'everything he's eve…

Yes, boundaries are key. I would question if you have a realistic sense of “using a person for emotional labor.” This is what boundaries protect you from. But the way you worded it, it feels as if t…

With love. You can't repair a relationship alone. It sounds like he's accepted the relationship is coming to an end, did he discuss where you will both live (separately or together) after the 6 weeks…

That's a lot. Getting a list with all the things someone doesn't like about you is already really hard to swallow, even harder when it's given by a person you loved and trusted very dearly. Not only d…

I'm on chat-contact with a lady across the Atlantic . I feel fairly emotionally safe with her, but the distance makes the relationship borderline unrealistic. I'm divorced with a son whim I love more …

How often should you share emotions with your partner? I [43F] am avoidant and my partner [43M] is anxious. I am trying to find the realistic and healthy balance of emotion sharing as I tend to not …

I'm struggling with what is realistic to ask/expect regarding texting. I spent the entire weekend with my boyfriend, he left for work this morning and we texted throughout the day while he was at work…

Here are some CBT exercises worth trying: Cognitive Restructuring:  Identify automatic negative thoughts and challenge them by looking for evidence for and against them, considering alternative expl…

Thank you for the insightful response, yes I have met this person we had to transition to long distance actually but we plan to get married after college. In terms of realistic plans I plan to move to…

People who are clueless around health issues and freeze when faced with pain, blood and other medical things are not necessarily having attachment issues. That's just a life skill that they lack. As …

Is it normal you freeze an entire night and morning watching someone you care about be like that? My back just started hurting out of nowhere and I couldn't walk, sit, or lie without feeling a sharp p…

It is a realistic expectation. I would not act the same way, but it's still not an attachment issue. You need to decide if you want to stay with this person or not.

Would you have actually gone to the hospital if he had suggested? If he had sprung up and said “let’s go to the hospital right now” would you have been relieved he made that decision? Since you had me…

Yeah the anxious spiral can be brutal. Treat this like a breakup almost. There's grieving involved in a chapter of your friendship ending and another one beginning. Allow yourself and make space for…

Something I experience with intuition vs anxiety is that intuition in my experience comes to me when I am calm or doing something that soothes my mind, and this creates room for my intuition to “come …

You can have as many requirements on a partner as you want. The more requirements you have, the likelier you'll be single. But realistically, people don't date the first homeless person on the streets…

I know my relationship of 15 years is over. She's mentally unwell and has very drastic mood swings, but she refuses to actually get help or to work on herself at all. When she's in a good mood, she …