shallow

Update: Tried to set boundaries, now they want to be paid 25k — It's been a few months since my \[last post here\] (https://www.reddit.com/r/AsianParentStories/s/lXVFmvyxxM), but its mostly come to a resolution. I wanted to do an update because I got some really …

Trying to navigate a "casual" relationship — Hi everyone, I (30F, trans) have been talking to/seeing a woman (24F, cis) for about 5 months. The chemistry is legitimately the strongest I’ve ever experienced - emotional, intellectual, creative, s…

I finally realized my fear of closeness is really a fear of being known — I've been working to understand myself better as a DA, in part with the help of Reddit. I now feel the last puzzle pieces fell into place and I finally have a coherent story of why I am the way I am. …

DA healing update: searching my true self, my inner child finally seen — Some of you may know me at this point. I'm (40M) dismissive avoidant, my wife fearful avoidant (41F), together 17 years, married 13 years, 3 children. I've been working on my attachment style for 5 mo…

I don't connect with others anymore — Meditation taught me about awareness and of the things I feel i truly want and need in life. But in our materialistic and commercialized setting it seems the goal of everyone is to get more and more …

Has this happened to anyone in a lucid dream before — So to make this short, I don't ever lucid dream becausei don't know how to trigger it. In my dream I just became aware I was in a dream randomly I was in an unknown city in an unknown shopping mall wi…

People Pleasers Make the Worst Partners — I'm a Codepedent in Recovery. My partner is also a Codependent (Severe) and he's refusing healing and is a Chronic People pleaser. Being in a relationship with a people pleaser is exhausting. You sl…

I am ruining my life and I feel like i cant stop it — Hello everyone and let me say thank you for taking the time to read and/or respond. Our time is valuable and I want you to know thst I genuinely appreciate you giving your time to a stranger... This …

I Stayed For WAY Too Long — I just found this sub (after watching the Ben Affleck movie *Deep Water*, which was super triggering), so I thought I'd tell you my story. Maybe someone here can relate. My ex-wife struggled with a …

Does my chart suggest or explain my commitment issues? — I do pretty alright in friendships, however in romantic relationships I have a tendency of breaking up around month 3. This is almost always due to me becoming ‘bored’ of my partner, feeling that we d…

Nothing is wrong, but I still feel on edge all the time - how do you reduce stress without medication? — I don’t know if anyone else feels this, but I’m kind of stuck in this weird state where nothing is actually wrong… but I still don’t feel calm. It’s not panic or anything extreme. Just this constant …

I Astral Projected — I actually astral projected but it was a little scary, due to tgw fact it was such a new experience.. Firstly to explain how this even came to a possibility ill describe the events leading to this mom…

Where do I go from here re: dating/socialization/adulting, as a college student near my hometown who has a job lined up near my hometown (both suburban) — So good news is I got a job! It's not in a major city though; it's in a suburb of one, meaning I'll have to drive my car to everything and all that. I'm still wondering whether to take my chances wit…

My self esteem is tearing me apart — I hate so much about me and anything I kind of like about me are either because several other people told me they liked it or because it’s conventionally liked but I completely isolate it form the res…

It has been two years since I broke up, and here we are, folks. — It's a strange day/event to commemorate, yet it's undeniably a significant one. I feel like it's important to pay a token of respect to the journey I took. So here we are. 1. Before diving deep into …

It’s Been Four Years 😢 — If anyone can share some advice, I’d really appreciate it. It’s so embarrassing for me to share this, but I need to get it off my chest. I still haven’t gotten over my ex-situationship (would’ve been …

Do you believe "clothes make the man" or is it just a lazy proxy for judgment we should have evolved past by now? — I used to think "clothes make the man" was nonsense. Now I'm not so sure, and it bothers me. I've built what I consider a genuinely good life: solid health (M37, Italian), a great marriage (18y this …

Have I 22F have destroyed my boyfriend 24M and I's sex life? — EDIT: I was not expecting to receive this many comments and am sorry for the lack of response. I’ve been very busy with work the last 12 hours and will try my best to respond as soon as possible. (I…

I think I just “received” something about Chris Bledsoe’s prediction, but I don’t have enough knowledge to better develop my reasoning about what I received. Is there any astrologer, chemist and alchemist here in this group? The question is something about regulus, halogen, tennessine and antimony. — This also seems to have to do with Archangel Michael. If you are a astrologer, chemist and alchemist, could you please tell us if you can visualize any possible physics or metaphysics connection betw…

I was loved but I was emotionally neglected? — I was recently diagnosed with CPTSD, the cause being emotional neglect, but I don’t get it as I love my parents, they loved me and seemed like they cared for me, in school they’d always stick up for m…

Curious if this has happened to anyone else post affair? — Hi all, I posted awhile back about my husband contemplating leaving me for a girl he met in an online porn site. She was based in Colombia.. if you go to my profile you can read the whole thing. Lots …

It gets easier — I want to give something back to the heartbroken souls whose seconds revolve around that loud echo left by all of the “I love yous”. Our breakup was 6/2025. I did reach out a couple of times, they d…

I am scared of relationships because I dont want my partner to grow old — I’ve never been in a relationship, and I’m scared of something that feels ugly to admit. I’m afraid that if I fall in love and get married, I won’t be able to handle my partner aging and becoming less…

I stumbled on my husband’s reddit account. One of them, anyway. — I’ll probably delete this, but right now I need to get it out, to call my nerves and be there for my kids. My hands are a little shaky. I was certainly not expecting this today. Or any day. I was goi…

OBE or Lucid Dreaming? — I was sleeping during my lunch break at work. I think I had a lucid dream where I experienced something like an OBE. I felt the vibrations and heard the sounds associated with it. I saw myself sleepin…

How can I be more authentic? I don‘t have a sense of self. — To offer an example, I often feel inauthentic whenever I am talking to people or expressing myself in any way. I feel empty and I lack a sense of self; it is not unusual for me to lie to make myself s…

They are gonna regret It. — Unless you cheated, abused or something like that or if they have already found their person. If all of this didn't happen, they are gonna regret breaking up with us because to suffer like we are doin…

Has anyone actually fixed your lower back pain by targeting your psoas? — I've had lower back pain since my late teens. No known cause, but I've suspected it is tight psoas. Has anyone else struggled with this, and what specifically helped? Info: Tight psoas muscles ofte…

Ending things (M31 and F28) Over Shallow Reason? — I've been seeing a woman for 7 weeks (9 dates). We met on Hinge. She's extremely nice and has a good personality. I think she likes me quite a bit. I'm hung up on an aspect of her that I didn't realiz…

Stress and anxiety — Hey, so this is particularly about relationship. Me and my boyfriend been living together for 2 years and we’ve never lived away from each other since then. We don’t have any relationship issues and a…

Is it finally time to break off and how can I (22F) bring it up with my boyfriend (22M) when I never once expressed any discontentment/resentment strongly and openly? — I really need some advice regarding my boyfriend. For context, we met abroad in a western country. I am Chinese and he is Japanese. This context kind of matters. Our relationship started poorly as a …

You never loved being with me, you loved the idea of being with me — It all just makes so much sense now, every time I tried to get closer you would pull away. Every time you mentioned your ex or your dad and compared them to me I realized something was wrong. You didn…

How to internally source the feeling of being loved ? — I realise that I’m chasing relationships because I want the feeling of being loved and adored, not because I found someone and I want to be with them. And I’m thinking, what am I lacking that is mak…

I (24M) love my girlfriend (24F), but our sex life is almost nonexistent—what do I do? — I (24M) am contemplating breaking up with my partner (24F) and I really do not want to let her go. We have been dating for three (3) years and she is like my other half. She is very beautiful, kind, s…

Need Advice, Confusing Breakup — Hi guys. I am going through a really confusing breakup right now and partially just need to talk and partially want to ask for advice. I was with my now ex-boyfriend for 1.5 years. On paper he was the…

How can I stop feeling suicidal like this — Every night, or whenever I have time alone to think, I end up in the same place. Since I was about 15 or 16, I have kept coming back to the thought that I don’t deserve to live and should end my life.…

Not sure can anyone relate — I’m constantly dizzy, floaty, and my heart races—unsure if it’s anemia or something else I’m not sure where to start, but I’ve been dealing with something that’s affecting my life a lot. My symptoms…

Some help would be appreciated — I’m constantly dizzy, floaty, and my heart races sometimes —unsure if it’s anemia or something else I’m not sure where to start, but I’ve been dealing with something that’s affecting my life a lot. …

I did something… — I had a very bad moment and I felt like I couldn’t keep going…I put a plastic bag on my head and stayed to so what happened…I closed it so that air wasn’t passing through…i stopped when I started to n…

Sex search after divorce — Ladies, serious advice needed. I'm 57M, divorced over a year. My ex and I cut off all physical contact a year before we split. We were together 15 years and had a passionate and ongoing romance until …

No one seems to be asking questions — I’m female, 40s, currently trying out the dating apps. I’ve found that conversations very quickly become me asking questions, and them just replying, and not asking anything back. Not even “what about…

Fearing regret — So my wife and I have been discussing divorce, entirely initiated by me. We have a wonderful family and she is a wonderful woman. She is kind, genuine, hard working, fit, supportive. We have 3 teenage…

People and their dumb opinions — Let’s say that people hear about a man that filed for divorce because his wife gave him sex only once a week. Everything else about the wife is great. Many would say that he’s selfish and shallow. Bu…

Recently divorced M (44) not sure what I feel about a F friend (48) — Ok, so I divorced three months ago after a 25 year marriage. My ex-wife loved me, I loved her, no third person, but we're neurodivergent and had different love languages .. Shee neglected the couple r…

I still have trouble calling what I went through abuse, hoping for some perspectives — I’m a 23 year old south asian man, born and raised in the US. I’ve compiled this list of the specific events of abuse I remember at the hands of my parents for catharsis. I’ve never spoken to anyone a…

Yep, Redshift observability is one of those things that should be easier, but ends up buried in system tables and tribal knowledge. Some practical tips that might help: 1. Build a lightweight monito…

Got it. Was not expecting her to share something vulnerable, I draw a line in shallow connection & up until 6 months it was casual banter. I need serious invested friends, not those who are there just…

I think you should market this... I probably would have used this. I had a situationship I was desperate to hang onto. I gave so much space, barely pestered, got on his same wavelength of taking the s…

Oh trust me, I learnt through the school of hard knocks by "giving the benefit of a doubt" when I was a Disorg leaning Anxious. As a Learnt Secured, I still do that occasionally. Some avoidants love …

Boring because of not wanting to share his feelings and trying to not get deeper into any discussion beyond the shallow level because he thought disagreements lead to conflicts and conflicts are bad. …

If you would rather die than be single, something is very wrong with your perspective. It's not wrong to want a relationship either so I won't say things like "be happy being alone" (although you shou…

Be more discerning of their profiles. I feel like you can tell a lot by photos they share and how much or how little they share about themselves. Are they posting a lot of sad looking selfies? Or just…

I can tell you my experience. I have been in a close to 7 year relationship with a BPD ex girlfriend, quit that one more than a year ago, if you know the dynamics you know that's a huge slap in the fa…

You need to prioritize the relationship with your self. Find more things to fill your life. It could be things like hobbies and other friendships. Centering your life around other people will create c…

I've heard (and taught) all this stuff so many times. I just...have a lot of snags around it all. Let me go through each of your points. I have other hobbies and interests, but it's hard for me to ac…

Man, it's so awkward when there is something glaringly misleading about someone's pictures. I understand that people will choose flattering pictures & that is ok, but sometimes it's just really clear …

I (38M) divorced a few years ago. Married for 10 years, had three kids, and it was toxic. I feel I kicked out my coverage and married an 8 or 9 while I’m a 5 or 6. Part of the toxicity was constantly …

Guy in tech here, just piping in to say this guy's an idiot on multiple levels. Obviously he's factually wrong, but beyond that it shows he's overconfident in his ignorance. Honestly, even implying th…

Nerves. I can't remember the last time i've rejected someone I dated, so I'm having a hard time deciphering how i'm feeling. I had a great first date with a girl last weekend and since then we've conn…

Thanks, this was helpful. I plan on mentioning to my therapist as well. I think part of it comes from having always been the one who gets rejected. And I’m always looking for connection so it feels …

I've also been rejected a lot, but I think it's worse the longer something goes on. Rejection after a 1st to 3rd date is pretty par for the course. I understand wanting to protect someone's feelings, …

Well I was just curious if I was missing something about your take other than "older guys are uglier to me cuz no one wants someone in their 30s". Like I legitimately think a lot of people I know look…

I'm a woman and date both men and women, I tend to avoid people who use a gym selfie in their dating profile. Just feels a bit vain/narcissistic/shallow, IDK. I've tried being a bit more open minded a…

Motivated by money is a 😴 to me... Using it to try to hide being boring and shallow? Next!

I second this. I have fucked up enamel and the staining treatments are painful. I've just accepted to have one photo with my teeth showing so people can pass if they're disgusted. We all pass on profi…

I’m feeling overwhelmed in my life right now and by my shallowness. I just haven’t been attracted to anyone and it’s stressing me out. I’m trying to be more open to dating out of my normal parameters …

The third point of this comment outlines why I’m with a man who finds it hard to show verbal emotions. Do I find it frustrating sometimes? Yes, but I’ve had so many persons I’ve dated telling me how m…

It sounds like you’ve really been tracing how your past experiences shaped your feelings and reactions in relationships, which is huge self-awareness work. From an attachment and trauma perspective, t…

I feel like the prompts on the apps make every profile shallow. Eg 2 truths and a lie. It sounds like a shitty team building activity at an entry level job. I’d never mention any of those prompt topic…

I've replied to your pursuits inquiry. It took me a few minutes to write up. I'm in no way looking for a super model. In fact, in my mind that would be too much competition and not for me lol. I'm b…

Seriously!!! It makes me feel so shallow when I'm not interested in person after person for one reason or another. I took a break for a few months and came back to it in January. It seems like it's ti…

Losers? Hokay. Woman aren't less shallow than men and it's a weird trend to say that they are. BUT, in general, women are more likely to grow attraction to someone they weren't initially attracted to…

I have a Libra moon conjunct Pluto and it makes my moon a lot more like a Scorpio moon. A lot more emotional depth and sensitivity. I have a ton of Scorpio moon friends. I don’t think I have any Libra…

Same experience. After two months she told me she found our conversations shallow 😳 I shared more with her than with my friends. I was quite upset after this. It’s weird how people can give you th…

Seems pretty shallow to me personally but you do you, boo

music is subjective. lol i dont like taylor swift, but i can at least acknowledge what shes done with her music career and being one of the few girls in pop that write and produce their own music is p…

I'm sorry for all the pain and trouble you have gone through. > The internet doesn't seem ready for the discussion that two contradictions can exist at once. This is true. Unfortunately, the current…

Who cares IMO. Just do what you like. Growing up I was plenty involved in my culture, but other Asians were constantly making fun of me for not being “Asian enough”. Meanwhile I was actively competing…

I know there is someone out there for everybody. But, when ever I see these post, maybe I’m just shallow, but I’m like “post a pic”😂

There's definitely not been any incompatibilities or red flags so far. I will admit that possibly the biggest hang-up I have is a very shallow one, that she is not quite as physically attractive as so…

> I will admit that possibly the biggest hang-up I have is a very shallow one, that she is not quite as physically attractive as some previous girls I have dated. Does this impact your connection at…

I wrote a long comment but I deleted it cuz it's too long to understand tbh. I'll just put it like this A post complaining about the subreddit will get hundreds of upvotes routinely. As long as that …

No, but it would probably be best to stay out of online dating apps for financial reasons. And bc they are quite shallow...So shallow in fact that even women like my friends who have everything in ord…

this is something i struggle with all the time!! I can talk about positive things, but if someone asks a question about *me*, I literally have nothing i can say that won't make them uncomfortable or r…

I was 24 at the time and this guy I had just started dating seemed to check all the boxes, we both hiked, camped, kayaked, sailed( he had a boat,) loved to co-cook and he had great taste in wine, and …

I went on few dates with this guy - first few dates he was at the restaurant or bar before me, so I didn’t notice anything. 4th date we agreed to meet for a walk. He had the weirdest walk! He has play…

A lot, but not in the way you think.  I love bald men. Huge turn on.  I also don't notice thinning/receding hair, or If I did I wouldn't care.  Truly.    I know there are so many shallow women out…

It wasn't necessarily all an act. It's not that they don't have feelings. It's that their feelings are just short moments, they're shallow and self serving. My nex had feelings but those feelings re…

I dated a guy who was awesome! Until he laughed, like a donkey. I was 20 something. I still can’t imagine being with him today. I’m sorry for being shallow, but dude- that laugh was really bad. I have…

My boyfriend now does the same thing 🫣 But my bf now has many more redeeming qualities and I realized that I was being super shallow back then (25+ years ago) But you best believe I try to get him t…

Yeah it's basically shallow or petty reasons that bother the characters to no end, like toe-thumbs.

That comment is as shallow and insensitive as it can be. Her audacity is appalling. She does appear to be a narcissist.

A lot of people underestimate how powerful physical touch is as a human need. Wanting closeness, hugs, and skin-to-skin contact isn’t strange or shallow. It’s a very normal part of how many people reg…

Honestly ive dated someone like this, Honestly, no and never will I do that again because the comments come and keep on coming. Your self esteem takes a huge knock when you date someone who lov3s a pa…

I get people having preferences but limiting things to a certain type seems pretty silly. Especially at over 40 where the pool is shallower than our 20’s. My GF told me she didn’t date guys under …