Move on

So what's your point?? Move on and go where?? Who doesn't have a demon?? You think if she moves on the next man won't have a problem too?? So if she encounter another problem with the next man, what w…

Even as an FA the one thing I'll never understand about avoidants is how they can hate someone they cared about a week ago. — I was reflecting and journaling on my past relationships, and taking full responsibility for past mistakes. I'm an FA so there were times when I thought I needed external validation to feel whole, and…

Suggestions are like Forex signals - doing the exact opposite is where the real money is — I was in a Discord channel with 90K+ designers and every time someone dropped their landing page or website, it felt like getting advice from someone selling Forex signals. Doing the opposite would a…

I need you advise am i a UX Jnr Midwieght or more? — **Hi everyone, I need some advice.** I’m currently a Junior UX Designer (30years old) in the UK at one of the top for new broadcasting companies such a Sky BBC ITV etc. **A bit about my background:*…

Finding Like Minded Business People — **TL/DR :**  Looking for people who are stuck with unsure with what business they want to pursue and end up learning a little bit about all of them; that want to partner up to stay focused with each …

How can I profit from my endless rotating hobbies? — Hey all! I’m a 24 year old who works full time and has five million hobbies. Such as… physical art in most mediums, digital art, animation, multiple instruments, theater, crochet, story writing, singi…

Every day I try to do things right. Every day they say no. Now I duct-tape and maintain the mess I warn them about — Hey folks, Just wanted to drop this little gem of corporate masochism So I work at this company where we develop software for real state agencies, in this 'properties' sql table we have a field cal…

Does your business have to be something you’re good at? — I have a production company and have spent most of my late teens and early 20s being a music artist, pursuing shows, publications, and making music connections to very little success. I’ve met great …

You know what sucks about being in the process of healing your attachment type? Dating someone who has no idea they have an insecure attachment and you're just wasting all that hard-earned security on someone who doesn't care — I've been fearful avoidant most of my life, and it's helped me in abandoning very healthy partners because I was too blind of my issues. For 2 years now I've been working on myself and seeing huge s…

Is this Deactivation? Seeking insights from FAs. Please help me understand this — We're together for 6 months, a lot of push/pull in the beginning, but by the 4th month everything was finally going fine between us. He even called me his girlfriend nd promised to heal and everything…

Detachment or deactivation? — Me (23M) and my ex (22F) broke up one month ago because she was feeling overwhelmed by some arguments we had due to changes in our lives (new place to live, new work). She's FA. I was secure for almos…

Ignoring after an argument. Deactivating or disinterest? — I’m not really sure if this belongs here or in my Taurus subreddit, because he’s a Taurus, as am I, and we can be stubborn. But he also leans very avoidant, and has started ignoring me after arguing.…

For avoidants (and those leaning/earned secure): is this avoidant behavior? Do you really move on—and why no closure? — For avoidants (and those leaning/earned secure): is this avoidant behavior? Do you really move on—and why no closure? I began therapy 4 months into our situationship because of how strong he came on,…

Success Story: FA/Disorganized Attachment Healing Roadmap, Resource Recommendations — **Hello, fellow Fearful Avoidants! The below post has grown out of almost 3 years of research and healing this attachment style, which in my case was coupled with Relationship OCD (ROCD). ROCD is a vi…

Rushing to know if I’m long term compatible with someone — The past two years I’ve done a lot of internal work on myself regarding my attachment and codependency issues. I feel that I lean more secure than ever. I recently started seeing someone, I’ve known t…

What did you notice changed when you began leaning secure? — I'm pretty happy with my progress. I notice I have a much lower tolerance for unaware dysregulation (no matter what kind it is whether it's someone push-pulling or an anxious type dumping on me). I d…

Happy and healing but still need to be "chosen." Advice welcome — I have been on a healing journey for my anxious attachment for a few years now. I am in a secure relationship where I have found a deeply vulnerable and safe connection and also know that if it ends I…

Letter to my ex — **7th February 2026** “You will find me, right?” That sentence is the last sentence. The one that always stays with me. Every single day I think about it, and I think that’s why I know what I have t…

Mission success (progressive goal structure for social media growth) — Hi everyone, I just reached my first success story which was reaching 10k followers on TikTok. I used the progressive goal structure process and initially started with 5k and then moved to 10k. Li…

Did your partnert felt like your mother emotionally? — I’m 26m and my partner 29f. We broke up almost a year ago but I cant cut my ties with her emotionally or spiritually . I dont want someone to be in her place so I don’t want to move on from her. Basi…

I (28F) cut off my in-laws after how they treated me before and during my wedding, but I get anxious when my husband (27M) still talks to them. How do I move on? — TL;DR: My mother-in-law and sisters-in-law insulted me, fat-shamed and color-shamed me before our wedding and caused major drama during the wedding itself. Now they act sweet in front of my husband. I…

Ex going on dates and hooking up — Me and my ex boyfriend broke up 2 months ago and he’s already going on dates and hooking up with them? I’ve been with him for 3 years and as soon as we broke up he was on the apps going on dates again…

I recently found out my close friend slept with my girlfriend while we were together. I'm struggling with how to process it. — I’m a 22-year-old Japanese guy and I recently learned something that completely changed how I see a lot of people in my life. About a year and a half ago I was in a serious relationship. We lived tog…

How do you stop overthinking and care less about things that don’t matter? — Hello, How do you learn to give fewer fucks about things that shouldn’t matter? I used to think I was the kind of person who could brush things off pretty easily, but lately I’ve been overthinking a…

What s month it's been — The title says it all. Confronted my wife last month on the 7th last month at 1 am and learned that she cheated on me and was talking with someone. This was after an emotional affair that I discovered…

You can reality shift just by washing your hands — Hey everyone, I’ve been obsessed with this idea lately and I can’t stop thinking about it: what if the simple act of washing your hands, when you actually slow down and get fully present with it, bec…

I (28F) am tired of constantly having to ask or tell my partner (28F) how to love/care for me. Do I just move on? — I’ll start off by saying, I completely understand we have to communicate with others on the ways we want to be loved and cared for. This isn’t that anymore. My gf and I have been together for a littl…

What happens when a narcissist gets engaged? — Genuinely asking because I found out he recently got engaged with his gf I tried to warn that he cheats.. but what do narcissist do when they get engaged, do they actually change? They been together f…

Lack will dissolve when you realise: Manifestation starts from irony, and feeling it real starts from memory. — I said it. This post is for people whose brains are very logic driven. Those who think: “I need to see proof before I believe something.” i have something for you. Let's go. We all know the key: The…

I’m scared of everything I love becoming old and I’m scared of the world right now — Okay so for starters I’ve always hated time, I hate it so much and I don’t know why, the thought of years passing makes me feel so uncomfortable and I just want to go back in time to when things were …

Why do most victims survive the harm, while perpetrators can’t cope with a slither of accountability? — Victims live with the pain. The fear. The long-term fallout. Not being believed. No justice, or having to fight for it. Being made the aggressor through DARVO. The loss of safety. The way it rewires y…

Where to go from here — Just to warn you, this is a long one... For context, my partner (F39) and I (M40) have been together for 17 years, have two kids together. This all started in early January but seems to have been goi…

read this if you are confused — Yes I have shifted, here is the mindset that brought me to this point. If this does not resonate with you move on. For those who follow the Law of Assumption, non duality etc I intend this will make …

I did it, I broke no contact. — So I had made a previous post about reaching out to my ex after a month of no contact. I was super hesitant about it and almost didn’t do it because I was worried about the result. But after some hesi…

What are your personal OLD rules — I am 50M straight. I have my rules, curious what other thinks: \-I always send a message if the platform allows, and it is always something related to her profile, and ends with a question for her to…

Do not break No contact — Don’t judge me. When you are in love you do stupid things. After long no contact. I did send a text if they like to meet up over the weekend. Why did I do that?! I saw them, they are active in socia…

I feel it is very hard to make "permanent" progress, like this is a mind virus that keeps coming back — I'm 39M. I met my partner when I was 36. Dated for 2 years, now we have lived together for 1 year. I've made progress over these 3 years but I feel like it's very easy to "reset" and get back down int…

It hurts too much — God I never realised the level of pain that comes with being dumped by someone you genuinely loved and imagined a future with. It all seems like a big lie from their end. And to see them just move on …

Do you feel “The Click”? — Currently talking to a friend about manifestation and trying to explain how I just “know”. So I was curious if anyone else feels an internal “click” feeling where all doubt disappears and you can move…

Broke up with me because his father didnt want him to be distracted from his career. Why cant I forget him? — As the title mentions. I (DOB 30.12.1993, first chart) was best friends with this boy (DOB 13.10.1994, second chart) from 2013 and we started dating in 2014 beginning. The relationship was a very good…

Will they ever stop stalking me & seeking revenge? — I’m honestly desensitised to it at this point but yeah- do they ever move on? I don’t understand why they won’t just let me go.

The habit of hiding things…. — I really thought I was past this of hiding situations and trying to deal with them on my own. It may not seem like a big deal, but this habit has gotten me into awful situations before, sometimes even…

My ex-wife tried to kill me a few years ago. She just moved in three houses down from me. — I’m struggling with how to even process this. A few years back, things with my ex-wife reached a breaking point. She was struggling with substance abuse, alcohol and pills, and I had discovered she’d …

I (34F) found out my ex-husband (40M) cheated on me again, after we were supposed to be working things out. — I found out, from the person he's been cheating on me with, that it happened over a year ago and has been happening since. Of course i flipped out and went ballistic! He claims she was psycho and wa…

Boyfriend of 3 years keeps storming out during every disagreement - feeling lost — I'm a 28F and my boyfriend is 30M. We've been dating for about three years now and I'm starting to wonder if this pattern we're stuck in is ever going to change. The main issue is that whenever we…

Letting go is liberating — Letting go is liberating. I’ve learned that if you don’t break the cycle with a narcissist, they will always find a way to pull you back in. Each time you think it will be different, but it only gets …

My boyfriend blew our savings. (F32) (M34) — I don't want to go into too much detail since he uses reddit but as the title says my(f32) boyfriend(m34) blew our savings on a really dumb investment. We've been together 6 years and have a 4 year ol…

Missing my old self. — I miss my old self. I miss everything about my life before I got into a relationship with my narcissist ex. I was fun, carefree, light, and I genuinely loved life. I feel like I’ve had a dark cloud o…

[Update] She [F25] withdrew consent after the act, how do I [M26] move on from this? — Hey everyone First, thank you for all the messages and the support I talked with my best friend about everything, she was already aware of everything because of that girl and chose to take her side. …

I (30F) suspect my mom (58F) may have taken money and my deceased grandmother’s earrings while I was away. I have no proof and it still bothers me years later, how do I move forward? — I’m 30F and my mom is 58F. I currently have very minimal contact with her due to a number of issues in our relationship. I haven’t blocked her, but I don’t engage much beyond unavoidable family events…

Leaving them unblocked only hurts you — Though I started to see my narc ex for what he was and began detaching a few month ago, I still left him unblocked. I hoped he would message me either to apologize or give me 'proof' he was a narc. I …

Came here to say this, it's not coming from a truly wanting to move on mindset, because you're still concerned the effect it has on them

In my experience, No Contact is for you first and foremost as a human being to heal and be a better version of you. If (and I mean IF) your ex contacts you, consider it icing on the cake. And hearing …

IMO depend on the situation… if she was a REALLY good person, and you did some mistake, u might wanna get her back. Then the silence radio can either make her regret, either help her to move on. So it…

Yeah, this is not true and not really good advice. In fact, it’s mental bullshit that feeds the ego of a person. People are bitter and want their ex to feel bad and regretful because it makes them fee…

Stop stalking their socials too. Mute on instagram. It pushes their stories and their posts to the end of your feed so unless you’re following 2 people, you should never see anything from them. Muting…

It may not. But ignore her. Dont ever expect her to come back. Move on

It's not my way unfortunately. I am still heartbroken 3 years on. I can't move on mentally. Physically I'm great going on dates, meeting new friends and working out 5 x a week.

Lol I have been visiting this sub for about a month now and when I first saw this post stickied I refrained from reading it because I didn't want them back, I just wanted no contact to help move on wi…

I don’t find people here often that have that mindset and I agree! People on this sub are so bitter, but if someone left because it’s what they thought was best, how can we hate them for that? Realizi…

Omg that’s horrible. I was ghosted to, that feeling of no clarity hits. You get so desperate that you reach out in so many ways in the beginning just to get an answer onto why?. I was never able to mo…

It’s hard moving on when you’re still so in love w/ them. I can’t get him out of my head. Idk how to move on and thinking about it hurts more bc I never wanted it to end to begin with. I lost my soul …

It is so sad when it feels wrong that it ended. But if they don't want you, all you can do is value yourself and move on. You are going to find someone who will treat you right and wants to fight for …

Same. I hung in there , at first thinking no matter what she does. Im more wise , I see her flaws, i will help her change. Me the man she “use” to say i was. She=“never give up on me”. Me-“never”. 4 w…

Saaame, were you able to move on? I'm still getting there, blaming myself for all the mistakes I've made

No contact is NOT about getting the ex back! It’s about truly moving on, breaking free mentally, emotionally and spiritually. It’s about freeing yourself and truly letting go. It’s not meant to be a …

DOESNT WORK ON WOMEN … MOVE ON BOYS

None of it *should* stop you from moving forward and healing, but for some people it still nevertheless does. I'm sorry, I know you said this more than half a year ago but I'm going through my situati…

Ew. I hate an ex who breaks up with me but wants to stay friends. You cannot have your came and eat it too and you cannot have me whatever way you want and demote and downgrade me after my investment …

Grieve then move on

What does that look like??? Find a new hobby. Anything. Try learning to knit. Learn to build robots. Take a class in 17th century blacksmithing. Join a woodworkers guild. Join an improve troupe. Volu…

If you left your ex then don’t go back because you’ll look like a chump… admit your mistake, move on and grow… if your ex dumped you then face it… you got dumped… examine yourself, grow and move on… …

I mean I know you want to feel superior. But why would your silence eat them up? They made a choice. The likely thought about it for a long time and were confident in their decision. They knew it was …

Yeah I've seen a lot of increase in those posts too. I don't think is the subreddit to tell everyone else that NC led you to get back with your ex, first of all is giving everybody false hopes or unre…

>The objective of LOB or LOA is to build lasting faith, not just temporary faith, over the long term to effect change subconsciously in the face of obstacles in life no matter what negatives are in th…

Or before going on a rant about an "avoidant discard" consider maybe someone just broke up with you because it wasn't working for them. People aren't obligated to stick around forever trying to for…

I'm also a recovering FA and I recently realized a few REALLY important things that are actually really simple. Figure out your boundaries and enforce them from a calm place. Our anxiety builds in our…

Simply get back to the things that give me joy in life. Nature, cycling, career progression, healthy cooking, travel, caving, gym, movie buff, research, etc. Never abandon my identity ever again when …

I think when I see AAs post, they’re told not to try to understand why a DA did something or what something means, but rather to just let it go. Good luck with that advice. As someone who’s a mix, so…

I totally relate to the awful feelings of seeing an avoidant ex move on super quickly while you are still reeling from the triggering and retraumatization of that relationship. Going through it right …

I'm pretty sure my ex bf was FA. He claimed he was anxious but the trauma he experienced and his behaviors leading up to our breakup kind of point to FA. He broke up with me for just shutting down. Li…

I am a sincere person. The most truthful version of what you are suggesting I could muster would be: “I had great hopes for a relationship with the person you pretended to be at first. I really wish…

Time to move on. 3 months is a blip in your life. Go no contact and in the months from now you'll feel so much better.

My man, I feel that deeply, as a FA myself, who seems to exclusively date other FA or avoidants. You need to start here, TheLoveChat Youtube: https://youtu.be/H8yRnR3iYA8?feature=shared - this man h…

You might want to work on your attachment issues first. It took a week for you to get attached. You can’t generally “spot” an avoidant. They still want love and all of those things. They’re not avoid…

You need to let go of this "dream guy" fantasy. I think it's making you ignore reality. You spent ONE WEEK together. Time to move on and stop putting people on an imaginary pedestal. The more you do t…

Hi there, i know it's only been a day, but are there any updates? Reading this, i feel a pit in my stomach for you and hope that he's just busy. It's almost like getting the news that someone you love…

My mistake. I must have misunderstood that. I’m sorry. I still stand by my comment- you can’t always spot an avoidant. The walls they build to ice us out are not “up” until something triggers them. M…

i’m an FA too and i will gladly and happily hate someone i cared about a week ago. it’s not some sudden thing, i just get a sort of “cumulative ick” feeling, and eventually there’s a straw that breaks…

You dodged a bullet. Interviews are a two way street, not only them wanting you but you wanting them. Leave a remark on Glassdoor and move on.

I would start small like charity shops and flipping the items or vinted and depop and taking better pictures and flipping the items for more, then you move onto trying to get the one time drop things …

Someone’s gotta be on the other end. He might be pushing, and looks like he usually is, but you’re pulling every time you entertain him. Because most people wouldn’t keep letting him in again, which y…

Thank you, that’s very true. Definitely shows I still have some work to do on myself, but I made my decision to cut things with him and move on!

That a very true perspective and I think the fact that I’m low key engaging shows that I still have to work on myself. Thank you :) But for now I’m definitely leaving him and move on! At least it took…

Thank you for sharing your perspective :) And I do totally see your point about over applying attachment theory. I think I feel hurt by these hot and cold dynamics and probably as an anxious person I …

Thank you for sharing :) I also thought he might be a DA because he’s also not good at expressing his needs, even when I tried to create a safe and non judgmental space for him to do so. But then he a…

Again, well said. You definitely have a good handle on it. So, if we honour our feelings and let ourselves get mad initially, then let that transition into compassion for the other unhealed person, th…

I think we cannot really move on faster but definitely will bring less baggage into a new relationship. I think it just makes us more likely to heal than to gain scars we have to live with. Their acti…

After 1.5 months, when he became distant taking 1 - 2 days to respond is when a securely attached person would recognise that the relationship isn’t giving them what they need/ the person isn’t showin…

To be fair, not exactly pressured because I just wouldn't do it. The implication of one day not doing it and the relationship being tied to this little game would make me avoid it. And how do you real…

So instead of replying individually and repeating myself, I'm just going to make a comment addressing it all. Firstly, it was interesting to read all these perspectives. I see where some of its comin…