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r/experiencersUpdated 30 days ago
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We’re in a computer simulation

I agree with you up to the point where you say that it doesn't matter what religion it is that you believe. But that belief, or focused mental cognition can influence outcomes. There is absolutely som…

r/experiencerscomment3/12/2026
How should this sub respond to reddit's api changes, part 2

How should this sub respond to reddit's api changes, part 2 — We stand with the disabled users of reddit and in our community. Starting July 1, Reddit's API policy blind/visually impaired communities will be more dependent on sighted people for moderation. When …

r/DevOpspost6/30/2023
A Procedural Update for the Continued Health of Our Subreddit.

A Procedural Update for the Continued Health of Our Subreddit. — Hey everyone on r/NarcissisticAbuse.  We get it, we really do– the U.S. political situation right now is a bloody mess with further escalation, rather than some kind of stability, on the horizon.  W…

r/NarcissisticAbusepost3/10/2025
i will not promote: help finding willing creators!

i will not promote: help finding willing creators! — Hey guys, I just launched an app and am looking to try out influencer marketing to promote it (TikTok specifically). We have been reaching out to content creators with emails in their bio but response…

r/startupspost5/6/2025
How to find willing creators?!? (TikTok)

How to find willing creators?!? (TikTok) — Hey guys, I just launched an app and am looking to try out influencer marketing to promote it (TikTok specifically). We have been reaching out to content creators with emails in their bio but response…

r/digital_marketingpost5/7/2025
How to find willing creators?!?

How to find willing creators?!? — Hey guys, I just launched an app and am looking to try out influencer marketing to promote it (TikTok specifically). We have been reaching out to content creators with emails in their bio but response…

r/Entrepreneurpost5/7/2025
Any Luck with TikTok Influencer Marketing? And where do you find them?

Any Luck with TikTok Influencer Marketing? And where do you find them? — Hey guys, I just launched an app and am looking to try out influencer marketing to promote it (TikTok specifically). We have been reaching out to content creators with emails in their bio but response…

r/smallbusinesspost5/7/2025
Global Policy Journal: “Don’t look up?“ – Why it is past time for serious holistic research into Unidentified Anomalous Phenomena

Global Policy Journal: “Don’t look up?“ – Why it is past time for serious holistic research into Unidentified Anomalous Phenomena — Karin Austin, Michael Bohlander and Kimberly S. Engels have contributed an excellent article to the Global Policy Journal. Two of these people I've met personally and they are experiencers who are doi…

r/experiencerspost11/22/2025
Studying attachment theory

Studying attachment theory — I’ve been studying attachment theory for a couple of months now, and I’ve only recently started to REALLY look into it. I started reading a book called Attachment Disturbances in Adults: Treatment for…

r/HealMyAttachmentStylepost11/24/2025
Is casual sex compatible with secure attachment?

Is casual sex compatible with secure attachment? — I feel like I have a solid grasp of attachment theory after reading a fair amount of the literature over the years, but there’s a philosophical question I can’t quite resolve. Can someone who is secu…

r/attachment_theorypost1/9/2026
A Splash of Cold-Water for you

A Splash of Cold-Water for you — **Background** Hey everyone, I'm a contributor to this subreddit, and spend time lurking from time to time. I'm quite familiar with every attachment style. I, myself, had to earn security from my ow…

r/attachment_theorypost2/2/2026
Jupiter in Aquarius and the impersonal nature of this placement

Jupiter in Aquarius and the impersonal nature of this placement — This is one placement I genuinely struggle to fully understand. Jupiter, as a principle, feels conceptually misaligned with Aquarius and its traits. The expansive, benefic, growth oriented nature of J…

r/astrologypost3/2/2026
Dating as someone between cultures

Dating as someone between cultures — Hi, just a thought I had with regards to non locals living in a different country: what has been your experience trying to date someone local? I personally have found it incredibly difficult as some…

r/datingoverthirtypost3/4/2026
A lot more people are hurt/traumatized than evil

A lot more people are hurt/traumatized than evil — A lot more people are traumatized/ in pain than are evil. And I won’t say that evil people simply don’t exist, they do, but there’s fewer truly evil people than there are hurt/traumatized people who d…

r/therapypost3/7/2026
I don't connect with others anymore

I don't connect with others anymore — Meditation taught me about awareness and of the things I feel i truly want and need in life. But in our materialistic and commercialized setting it seems the goal of everyone is to get more and more …

r/Meditationpost3/9/2026
The day has come!

The day has come! — For more than 50 years, the Monroe Institute has been quietly pioneering a systematic way to explore human consciousness — beyond meditation, beyond belief, and beyond theory. I’m excited to share tha…

r/gatewaytapespost3/10/2026
Potentially unpopular opinion re: Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents

Potentially unpopular opinion re: Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents — Just finished “Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents” by Lindsay Gibson after seeing several recommendations for it on subreddits like these. I thought the book had some good info, and I’ll a…

r/EmotionalNeglectpost3/17/2026
I feel like certain people latch onto me and drain my energy—how do I handle this?

I feel like certain people latch onto me and drain my energy—how do I handle this? — Hey everyone, I’m brand new to all of this, and I’m hoping for some guidance. I’ve always noticed that, at different times in my life, I’ve had specific individuals who seem almost obsessed with linge…

r/energy_workpost3/18/2026
Visited a dive bar in an abandoned and flooded city 03/18/2026

Visited a dive bar in an abandoned and flooded city 03/18/2026 — 03/18/2026 Several projections during the same morning, most of them mundane and not worth recording, but the total must have been 10 in a row. As soon as the astral body would forcefully return, I i…

r/AstralProjectionpost3/18/2026
"Men Can't Be Men Anymore"

"Men Can't Be Men Anymore" — A week ago, I [posted about the Louis Theroux documentary on the “Manosphere,”](https://www.reddit.com/r/Stoicism/comments/1rtveyg/the_manosphere/) noting my surprise at the scale of the phenomenon, u…

r/Stoicismpost3/23/2026
if you're in this vibe, you're not alone

if you're in this vibe, you're not alone — some of the vibes I've observed on a personal level now, has a lot to do with past pain resurfacing around "muggles," and the "muggle world." specifically the antagonistic energies we experience as in…

r/experiencerspost3/23/2026
Schools Hire Asian Teachers at Half the Rate of Other Groups, Re.search Finds

Schools Hire Asian Teachers at Half the Rate of Other Groups, Re.search Finds — Asian teaching candidates are more likely to boast an advanced degree, but less likely to get a job offer, according to a s.tudy of hiring data. School hiring processes play a crucial role in determi…

r/AsianAmericanpost3/23/2026
The western treatment of Korea's feminism in hindsight.

The western treatment of Korea's feminism in hindsight. — A Korean feminist's post that I encountered on twitter made a good analogy. If a group labels itself a disability rights or working class organization, it doesn't tell you about their full political l…

r/AsianAmericanpost3/29/2026
anyone else?

anyone else? — About six months ago, I began noticing unusual visual phenomena. Initially, I believed I might be seeing drones surveilling me, especially given recent legal stress. I would observe lights staying abo…

r/experiencerspost3/30/2026
I just watched a video on how ADHD makes us prime targets for abusive/narcissistic behavior, and I feel so defeated.

I just watched a video on how ADHD makes us prime targets for abusive/narcissistic behavior, and I feel so defeated. — Hey everyone, I’m writing this because I really need to vent and see if anyone else here with CPTSD and ADHD has experienced this. I just finished watching a video by a creator named Danish Bashir a…

r/CPTSDpost3/31/2026
DMT While on LSD-Trip Report

DMT While on LSD-Trip Report — Close to 10 years ago, I tried DMT (specifically, changa) while on LSD. I began to vibrate like a Tibetan brass bowl & the air turned bright purple around me. I closed my eyes & some language/code/sym…

r/Psychonautpost4/1/2026
Looking to do a little charity auction or something similar, aiming to do during AAPI month

Looking to do a little charity auction or something similar, aiming to do during AAPI month — Hey all, I was hoping to run a little charity auction. I was wondering if people were interested. And if they are I would like suggestions for Asian charities or orgs to donate too. I want to auction …

r/AsianMasculinitypost4/3/2026
Short term relationships and new sub users post here

Short term relationships and new sub users post here — This is a safe space for individuals to seek advice for relationships lasting shorter than 1 year or for any individual that is seeking general advice on infidelity that just started an account. We, …

r/survivinginfidelitypost4/3/2026
Human artificial limbs and implants impact

Human artificial limbs and implants impact — Hello everyone, I am curious about if anyone here knows whether there are any mentions of individuals who have lost a limb and had it replaced with a prosthetic, lab grown limb or had human created …

r/experiencerspost4/4/2026
What is the impact of Debilitated Sun and Moon on Life Challenges and Social Perception?

What is the impact of Debilitated Sun and Moon on Life Challenges and Social Perception? — I’ve noticed that in some birth charts where both the Moon (Chandra) and Sun (Surya) are debilitated, individuals seem to face significant challenges especially related to family, respect, and overall…

r/vedicastrologypost4/4/2026
Individuals who establish ET contact stabilize and prepare the collective field of humanity for contact

Individuals who establish ET contact stabilize and prepare the collective field of humanity for contact — https://preview.redd.it/v3y8tbq7o7tg1.jpg?width=900&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5e1a6af78106bc319602e0258747e9368ad77795 I wanted to share some methods here on how people can go experiment to see if they…

r/experiencerspost4/4/2026
How do I sort between feeling bothered by injustice, versus not feeling bothered by injustice?

How do I sort between feeling bothered by injustice, versus not feeling bothered by injustice? — In a situation where someone is being "hurt" (only in the sense that the individuals care about such things), i.e., having a physical item stolen from them, how can you care about having that item ret…

r/Stoicismpost4/5/2026
At Portland’s Lone Fir graves, a long-awaited apology is finally heard

At Portland’s Lone Fir graves, a long-awaited apology is finally heard — At a ceremony honoring ancestors and marking the start of memorial construction at Lone Fir Cemetery’s Block 14, Multnomah County’s chair and commissioners read their apology on site for the first tim…

r/AsianAmericanpost4/5/2026
Planetary Answers from a Lucid Dream "Tom Cruise"

Planetary Answers from a Lucid Dream "Tom Cruise" — I've had lucid dreams sporadically for a while with a group of dream characters/people in them who I've dubbed 'the family.' Most of them look unfamiliar to me (just regular looking people, though man…

r/experiencerspost4/5/2026
Alone

Alone — I was raised by narcissists. They abused me in multiple different ways, did not allow me to see my friends, blamed me for things they literally did, encouraged me to harm myself, stole my identity, an…

r/raisedbynarcissistspost4/6/2026
how come (certain) people react aggressively to suicide, and suicidal thoughts?

how come (certain) people react aggressively to suicide, and suicidal thoughts? — I started thinking about suicide when I was 12. I'm 21 now. One of the first things I heard was that I was being "selfish" and "stupid". My grandmother was dying back in 2016, her brother found out ab…

r/CPTSDpost4/6/2026
MECHANISMS OF CONTACT, “PRIME CONTACTEES”: A SPECIAL KIND OF CONTACT EXPERIENCER & WHY THEY ARE IMPORTANT. J. Burkes MD, edited 2020, 2026

MECHANISMS OF CONTACT, “PRIME CONTACTEES”: A SPECIAL KIND OF CONTACT EXPERIENCER & WHY THEY ARE IMPORTANT. J. Burkes MD, edited 2020, 2026 — **MECHANISMS OF CONTACT, “PRIME CONTACTEES”: A SPECIAL KIND OF CONTACT EXPERIENCER & WHY THEY ARE IMPORTANT.** **J. Burkes MD, edited 2020, 2026** **2026 INTRODUCTION: Before “Psionic Assets” I work…

r/experiencerspost4/6/2026
Unique Potential Divorce Situation

Unique Potential Divorce Situation — I actually can't believe I am typing this post out. Something I never thought I'd ever do. My wife and I are in what I would think is a very unique situation that I don't think a large percentage of t…

r/Divorcepost4/7/2026
I (20F) don't know if I should breakup with my bf (20M) because of our families

I (20F) don't know if I should breakup with my bf (20M) because of our families — ​ I'm feeling so lost and honestly don't know what to do, ive been dating my bf for six years, it's been lots of ups and downs. My family never liked him so we just kept it a secret but idk if…

r/BreakUpspost4/8/2026
Exponential amplification

Exponential amplification — I'm looking to put together a group as large as possible to do exponentially amplified manifestation. I assume you have all heard the saying "two heads are better than one". What about a thousand? All…

r/Manifestationpost4/8/2026
Are there individuals who astral project at will everyday at night?

Are there individuals who astral project at will everyday at night? — Am in a dilemma I have had some sleep paralysis and close to astral projection but I haven't seen .I was wondering if some among us do it everyday at will concoiusly.

r/AstralProjectionpost4/8/2026
PSA: Read the rules before you post and report rule-breaking behaviour

PSA: Read the rules before you post and report rule-breaking behaviour — Folks, We wish to start this PSA by thanking those that contribute significantly to the safety of RBN by reporting rule-breaking behaviour. Thank you. Let us be clear: moderation in RBN is extremely…

r/raisedbynarcissistspost4/8/2026
PSA: Reporting for 'repost', 'spam', 'karma-farming'

PSA: Reporting for 'repost', 'spam', 'karma-farming' — Folks, We've had quite a few reports recently on a post that say things like: * "Repost" * "Spam" * "Read this somewhere" Note that when we see these reports, we will always do a quick search to se…

r/raisedbynarcissistspost4/8/2026
Has anyone seen this location?

Has anyone seen this location? — I’m slowly processing a series of dreams that occurred last summer and I’m using AI to recreate some of what I saw. The first was a facility (as seen in the image) that I was trying to escape from. Th…

r/experiencerspost4/8/2026
Should I (20F) breakup w my bf (20M) because our families are not compatible

Should I (20F) breakup w my bf (20M) because our families are not compatible — I'm feeling so lost and honestly don't know what to do, ive been dating my bf for six years, it's been lots of ups and downs. My family never liked him so we just kept it a secret but idk if can keep …

r/relationshipspost4/9/2026
Right now I feel extremely alone, emotionally exhausted, and unsure how to move forward. I’m hoping to connect with others who understand parentification, narcissistic abuse, or rebuilding after losing support systems.

Right now I feel extremely alone, emotionally exhausted, and unsure how to move forward. I’m hoping to connect with others who understand parentification, narcissistic abuse, or rebuilding after losing support systems. — TRIGGER WARNING: Emotional abuse, narcissistic abuse, sexual assault, relationship abuse It took me a long time to realize what had happened to me growing up and I’m still trying to understand. As …

r/raisedbynarcissistspost4/9/2026
Please help us

Please help us — When my wife and I first got together, her mother was very welcoming. She spent time with us, smoked with us, and seemed supportive. Around that time, my wife (who was 16) wanted to become emancipated…

r/selfhelppost4/9/2026
I (34F) have been slowly iced out by my (34 F) gf and today she said she doesn’t feel romantic towards me after 1.5 years together. Do I commit to our plans to move to another state to be near her brother and his wife with a baby on the way?

I (34F) have been slowly iced out by my (34 F) gf and today she said she doesn’t feel romantic towards me after 1.5 years together. Do I commit to our plans to move to another state to be near her brother and his wife with a baby on the way? — We have had a beautiful and open relationship, have weathered many emotional storms with unity and even lived together for a year alongside her great mom who loves me, too. We have always talked abo…

r/relationship_advicepost4/9/2026
i do not wish this on even my worst enemy.

i do not wish this on even my worst enemy. — as of today, it’s been almost a month since everything went down, and about 2 weeks of complete no contact (because the other party had broken it twice prior lol). i’ve been absorbing myself in my stu…

r/ExNoContactpost4/9/2026
Yes, i am asking this question again, i am still confused 🫠😔 also maybe it turned into a vent

Yes, i am asking this question again, i am still confused 🫠😔 also maybe it turned into a vent — I (17f) keep flopping between whether i am a rotten abusive daughter who is ungrateful and my parents (50f) (54m) are the problem i absolutely hate them and wish the worst. soo yeah...... i guess i so…

r/EmotionalNeglectpost4/9/2026
Going no contact with narcissistic mother - rant

Going no contact with narcissistic mother - rant — TW: SA mention hi all, I hope you're taking care of yourselves and are doing well. this is my frist post. I would really appreciate any advice or if anyone has felt this way before. i often…

r/raisedbynarcissistspost4/9/2026
Astral Projection: Quick Start Guide

We are all completely different and unique individuals, we all discover it according to our level and willingness of consciousness. >why can't i? \^ you can, everyone can, some may just need to work…

r/AstralProjectioncomment9/6/2021
Astral Projection: Quick Start Guide

OK try thinking of a common place you go to that's memorable and see if you get images If not then I suspect you may have [aphantasia](https://www.verywellmind.com/aphantasia-overview-4178710#:~:text…

r/AstralProjectioncomment1/19/2022
The NO BS Guide on Winning Your Ex Back!

Yeah, this is not true and not really good advice. In fact, it’s mental bullshit that feeds the ego of a person. People are bitter and want their ex to feel bad and regretful because it makes them fee…

r/ExNoContactcomment5/14/2022
The NO BS Guide on Winning Your Ex Back!

I love my ex but we were so toxic together and our breakup did wonders in showing me how horrible our relationship was and just how much work I have to do on myself. My hope is maybe… in the future we…

r/ExNoContactcomment9/27/2022
START HERE! - Beginner Guides, FAQs, and Resources

Where is there more information on “the lucky few” whom for each dream they have, lucid dreaming is all that they experience? Has there been any research done on individuals like these, or are there o…

r/LucidDreamingcomment9/8/2024
My arguments against manifestation

Love these arguments. Point 1: There is a difference between hypnosis (true authentic feelings of experience of here and now of the desired outcome) and daydreaming. When you give your mind and your…

r/JosephMurphycomment1/23/2025
My arguments against manifestation

Okay logic and science- so your RAS reticular activating system is basically the minds way of filtering and processing the insurmountable data that it takes in from the environment 24/7 as well as pro…

r/JosephMurphycomment1/27/2025
Post-quality time cool down? Is this a pattern for DAs?

I do understand and I can agree it’s not a behavior that can cultivate a long standing relationship with someone who is secure or anxious. But the same can be said about other attachments aswell (no…

r/attachment_theorycomment3/30/2025
Post-quality time cool down? Is this a pattern for DAs?

I never said they tried, but who wants to find out that someone else emotional regulation depends on your constant presence. Again I’m talking about anxious attachment because secure people are secu…

r/attachment_theorycomment3/31/2025
Does attachment style start to shift after cutting out toxic family members?

I definitely have much less and less tolerance for dismissive avoidant individuals once I identified those traits in my mother, realized they’re a root of pretty much all my lifelong trauma, and start…

r/attachment_theorycomment4/9/2025
Even as an FA the one thing I'll never understand about avoidants is how they can hate someone they cared about a week ago.

It’s unhealthy to project or “mind read”. I think there’s a bit of this going on in your post. It may feel (to you) they hate you, because rejection feels bad. It’s not a good feeling to an ego or o…

r/attachment_theorycomment4/18/2025
Even as an FA the one thing I'll never understand about avoidants is how they can hate someone they cared about a week ago.

Thats odd, as an FA as well, my only relationship with an avoidant lasted like 2 days at best, I don’t even consider it a relationship either. I dumped her because she seemed so disinterested after we…

r/attachment_theorycomment4/18/2025
Even as an FA the one thing I'll never understand about avoidants is how they can hate someone they cared about a week ago.

To answer: They will escalate negative behavior towards you if you’re not respecting their distance or wishes for disengagement. I once told an ex, “If you keep staying with me I will treat you worse …

r/attachment_theorycomment4/18/2025
What hurts a DA?

As a previous DA, I did not feel guilt once I disengaged from someone because I had reasons for not wanting to be with them anymore. Those reasons may be very immature they may not make a lot of sense…

r/attachment_theorycomment4/26/2025
From Rejection to Redemption: How I Broke Into DevOps

I’m delighted to hear that you not only achieved your personal goals but also returned to contribute to this community. In this industry, it’s common for individuals to focus solely on their own succe…

r/DevOpscomment5/3/2025
I'm lucky enough to have turned my podcast into a full time job - here's what I wish I had known

Congrats! Think the most important thing is to pinpoint the right content niche - high demand, but also from well-paid individuals so that advertisers are willing to work with you. Not easy. I had a g…

r/Entrepreneurcomment5/6/2025
What are the signs to spot a DA or FA in early talking stage?

The same can be said with anxiously attached and codependent individuals though? Some people cant handle boundaries and in turn label them as neglect or avoidance when in reality time is required to p…

r/attachment_theorycomment5/21/2025
What are the signs to spot a DA or FA in early talking stage?

i feel from my experience it is. avoidant are very selfish individuals.

r/attachment_theorycomment5/21/2025
No one should suffer because we have trauma.

Hurt people hurt people. Is it wrong? Yep, but they do. All we can do is try to be better individuals and keep strong boundaries that If we are disrespected we can walk away. I always try to remember…

r/attachment_theorycomment5/30/2025
No one should suffer because we have trauma.

you are very heavily generalizing here. how many avoidants have you actually known? they cannot control their triggers, the ones that will try and heal will work on the behaviour around dealing with t…

r/attachment_theorycomment6/15/2025
No one should suffer because we have trauma.

\> "anxious individuals have a lack of self control, don't respect boundaries, and and don't realize how much damage they do because they just don't care" That would be basically correct, that's why …

r/attachment_theorycomment6/15/2025
FA Ex who semi-ghosted me sent me this message 2 months later

This is called “hoovering”, it’s a known technique for toxic individuals.   They’re saying whatever they think will suck you back in to the scenario.  Note the expansive, emotive but oddly totally no…

r/attachment_theorycomment7/1/2025
FA Ex who semi-ghosted me sent me this message 2 months later

Im amazed that you still didnt block her, lets be real here, attachment theories doesnt work in romantic relationships, if the person is into you they wont ignore you or disrespect you period. These a…

r/attachment_theorycomment7/1/2025
You know what sucks about being in the process of healing your attachment type? Dating someone who has no idea they have an insecure attachment and you're just wasting all that hard-earned security on someone who doesn't care

People who are securely attached are often more than their attachment style because their behavior isn’t constantly filtered through anxiety or emotional defense mechanisms. They’re not performing saf…

r/attachment_theorycomment7/12/2025
I’m FA, he’s DA

You MUST build a support system. You have to. The whole point here is to get better, not perfect, but to get better you have to do it. More of a network would show you that this isn’t a doom spiral,…

r/attachment_theorycomment7/23/2025
Struggling after “healing” is challenged

For me, being healed doesn’t mean that I’ll never be triggered by someone’s actions again. Rather, it means that when I recognize that someone is triggering me, I am able to remove myself from the sit…

r/attachment_theorycomment8/24/2025
I’m tired

Yeah OP if a man really loves you he won’t make you feel bad for those things. What I’ve found is to really get to know the person the best individuals arms you can fall into is someone who has the sa…

r/AnxiousAttachmentcomment9/8/2025
Thank you

Well, it is a book that essentially expands on attachment and shifts the focus to behavior patterns instead of 'styles.' It acknowledges that people use attachment behavior strategies towards attached…

r/attachment_theorycomment9/9/2025
Mass produced emotional security/intelligence?

Are you implying that eventually corporations will replace individuals as being representative to all capitalist economies?

r/attachment_theorycomment9/15/2025
Bi-Weekly Thread - Advice for Relationship/Friendship/Dating/Breakup

Being a man has nothing to do with any of this. Subscribing to toxic masculinity ideals will only do more harm to you. Odds are you are experiencing limerence which is not uncommon with anxious atta…

r/AnxiousAttachmentcomment9/17/2025
The most painful relationship and breakup I've ever had, but it cracked me open so that I could heal. I created a text message llm analysis tool that revealed insecure attachment.

Good lordy, this advice is fantastic. I've heard my partner say VERY similar things about wanting separate houses nearby or a duplex. Sanctuary is a big thing for them, and I've been struggling on how…

r/attachment_theorycomment9/27/2025
Any support groups out there for preoccupation with dating?

I would also be wary of relying too much on support groups, as they can become dysfunctional if not managed well. Before this sub became moderated, it basically functioned as an echo chamber where unh…

r/AnxiousAttachmentcomment10/7/2025
Do fearful avoidants "split" or "idealise" and then "devalue" when triggered? Or is it more likely to be a sign of something else? (Eg BPD/NPD?)

So… I have dated someone with DID before. Dissociative Identity Disorder. In these individuals, when anything even remotely stressful happens; they will quite literally turn into a different person. L…

r/attachment_theorycomment11/13/2025
Do fearful avoidants "split" or "idealise" and then "devalue" when triggered? Or is it more likely to be a sign of something else? (Eg BPD/NPD?)

It is very tough to make a distinction being so far removed from the individuals themselves, but I agree that as a FA, the people who have activated me the most- I also never saw them as “perfect” vs …

r/attachment_theorycomment11/16/2025
DAs, do you find that you avoid things in wider aspects of life, not just relationships?

That makes sense especially if you are an avoidant. Conflict=threat for avoidant individuals regardless of how it’s handled. I think in that case when you say you prefer peace what you actually mean…

r/attachment_theorycomment11/28/2025
DAs, do you find that you avoid things in wider aspects of life, not just relationships?

It isn't an avoidant attachment system. It's how the anxious attachment system functions. This is how the avoidant attachment system functions: >The Type A pattern in adulthood refers to both dismis…

r/attachment_theorycomment11/30/2025
DAs, do you find that you avoid things in wider aspects of life, not just relationships?

The anxious behavior strategies are fairly more obvious. >C1 (Threateningly Angry): They use anger to coerce attached figures into proving care and comfort. >C2 (Disarmingly Desirous of Comfort): Co…

r/attachment_theorycomment12/4/2025
How do anxious attachers know when they are truly ready to date again, rather than just trying to soothe anxiety or loneliness?

I can tell you my experience. I have been in a close to 7 year relationship with a BPD ex girlfriend, quit that one more than a year ago, if you know the dynamics you know that's a huge slap in the fa…

r/AnxiousAttachmentcomment12/8/2025
Do fearful avoidants "split" or "idealise" and then "devalue" when triggered? Or is it more likely to be a sign of something else? (Eg BPD/NPD?)

You don’t need to be arsey or defensive about it. I was just asking what your exposure or experince was with PD’s. As someone who is learning about them I’m sure you’d agree that there is a lot of mis…

r/attachment_theorycomment12/14/2025
Inner Child healing exercises?

You can listen to someone who just admitted they don't even have a paid account and just reads what they see online or listen to someone who's gotten more out of it in the last 30 days than four diffe…

r/AnxiousAttachmentcomment12/26/2025
DA Downplaying friendship

What you should keep in mind about all attachment styles is that, those are the basis for those individuals to form any kind of attachment relationship. So no, behaviors are not limited to romantic re…

r/attachment_theorycomment1/6/2026
Weekly Rant/Vent Thread

I am kind of freaking out. I’ve recently begun to talk to someone I met on a dating app with whom I have so much in common. We are both of the same religion, have the same values, similar humor and in…

r/AvoidantAttachmentcomment1/11/2026
The pain of being unmet...

Weird that you got a downvote, this is a great and insightful comment. I feel like I have a scarcity mentality about deep connection because I'm an unusual person, and it's hard for me to find others…

r/AnxiousAttachmentcomment1/11/2026
[Video] How to Tell if They're Emotionally Secure

I think her perspective on 'if they like you, you will know' is a bit of a reach. When someone attaches to another person is highly subjective. I don't agree with her perspective on anxious = fear of…

r/HealMyAttachmentStylecomment1/16/2026
How do you respond to people who are very quick to think that you’re angry at them?

Sure, all this information is accessible to anyone that wants to read Dr. Crittenden's work on the Dynamic Maturational Model of Attachment. Type A attachment defined my the DMM: >The Type A pattern…

r/attachment_theorycomment1/16/2026
If my nervous system is used to interpreting intensity as chemistry, then...am I just supposed to settle for love where I don't feel any "fuzzy" feelings? Like is love supposed to be boring? Then how do I even know the difference if a relationship is boring but good vs. boring but bad??

What I am describing aligns with individuals that struggle with mentalization and differentiation. Which are common patterns in anxious attachment. Claiming this is an FA thing is odd to me, FAs have…

r/HealMyAttachmentStylecomment1/20/2026
If my nervous system is used to interpreting intensity as chemistry, then...am I just supposed to settle for love where I don't feel any "fuzzy" feelings? Like is love supposed to be boring? Then how do I even know the difference if a relationship is boring but good vs. boring but bad??

>Anxious attachment is defined by hyperactivation and pursuit of reciprocity, not avoidance of partners’ needs or intolerance of negative affect. Those patterns are more consistent with fearful-avoida…

r/HealMyAttachmentStylecomment1/20/2026
Daily sticky thread for rants, raves, celebrations, advice and more! New? Start here!

I don't think any. There are some people that repeat the same thing daily and it's obvious why they have their problems. Or there have been individuals that make multiple posts in the same thread ov…

r/datingoverthirtycomment2/4/2026
Please help my friend and I decide if we're unreasonable. How much time do you spend with your partner or spouse and if you live separately or together.

I think it really depends on the individuals. If your friends husband, and your ex, are both avoidant they potentially just needed a little space to recharge. Which is not the same thing as not wantin…

r/datingoverthirtycomment2/9/2026
Please help my friend and I decide if we're unreasonable. How much time do you spend with your partner or spouse and if you live separately or together.

The whole "babysitting" language from a few people here ain't it. There's a difference between somebody who wants to spend time with or near you, versus someone who needs "babysat." It's not the same …

r/datingoverthirtycomment2/9/2026