walking on eggshells

As soon as I read the words "strict", "walking on eggshells" and "holds things over me", I knew your relationship was bad already. Thats exactly how I felt being with my own mentally-abusive ex. Don…

Mostly healed, but I can’t stop walking on eggshells before I trust a new date (anxious-ambivalent) — Edit: I’m single but I’ve dated guys online. I’ve changed almost all of my symtoms from anxious-ambivalent to secure attachment. When I first start text someone romantically however, it’s all good un…

A Splash of Cold-Water for you — **Background** Hey everyone, I'm a contributor to this subreddit, and spend time lurking from time to time. I'm quite familiar with every attachment style. I, myself, had to earn security from my ow…

My dad (56M) cut me off (21) for sleeping over at my boyfriend’s house. Now he’s blowing up at me and ruining our relationship beyond repair. — \-Sorry had to repost due to not having line breaks. I’ve always had a complicated relationship with my dad. He’s very controlling and has always been a “helicopter” parent when I was growing up. I a…

My Fiancé kicked me out with only a few hours notice — This is the situation I am in. About a week ago my fiancé (25 M) brought up how he has some problems with me (25 F). We have been together for almost three years. He said he cant bring up sensitive to…

I (26F) told my boyfriend (26M) I sometimes miss the freedom of being single and he broke up with me on my birthday — I (26F) have been with my boyfriend (26M) for about 2.5 years. A couple nights ago we were lying down together and having a really open conversation about different things going on in our lives. The …

Dealing with bf — My bf(26) and I(f25) have been together for over 2.5 years. He has always had a drinking problem, however he’d usually drink 12-18 packs on weekends, and an occasional 6 packs 1-2 weekdays. Lately, th…

Was my therapist blaming me for abuse? — My husband and I went to marriage counseling. I had an affair and afterwards he became very controlling and abusive. He had very strict terms for me to follow in order to remain married. He had my loc…

my boyfriend (27m) seems distant and i (26f) don’t know why — we’ve been together for 2 years and recently he’s been acting really distant. he’s less affectionate, doesn’t text as much during the day, and seems distracted when we’re together. i’ve tried casually…

I (24F) am pregnant by my (27M) boyfriend after a toxic relationship full of love bombing, lies, and sexual assault. I feel like i have no way out. What should I do? — Hi Reddit, I don’t even know where to start, but I’m at my breaking point and I really hope you can help me. I’m 24, my boyfriend is 27. We’ve been together for two years and have been living togethe…

Wife asked for a divorce. We have two toddlers and still live together. How do you survive this? — I am in the thick of it right now and could really use some perspective from people who have made it to the other side. Recently, my wife told me she wants a divorce. She has made it very clear that …

Writing a book for male survivors of emotional manipulation and controlling abuse/coercive control. — Wasn’t intending to post anything yet as this is still very much in draft; but I said I would, so here it is. I am writing a book for male survivors of domestic and family violence; not physical abus…

Life Happens — Recognize patterns of being controlling and possessive: You’re not allowed to visit family, or friends. Because they restrict you from going. They cling onto you and always accompanying you in everyth…

My story of confusion - need advice — In early 2024, I met a woman from another country, and we embarked on a long-distance relationship that initially felt like a rare, once-in-a-lifetime connection. For the first two months, we were in …

How do I handle recurring mood shifts and communication issues in my relationship? — I (22M) have been with my girlfriend (20F) for a bit, and I keep running into the same issue. It feels like small inconveniences or minor things can completely shift her mood, and when her mood drops…

be honest, would yall forgive ts/ come back if it was said to you? — recovering FA here, broke up with my secure attachment boyfriend 4 months ago, around new years. let's call him H, and the ex i mention in a later paragraph K. i was H's first partner and we were toge…

My 71 year old mother escalated to throwing objects at me tonight because I started vacation from work — Quick intro: I'm a 49-year-old man earning \~$225K/year, living with my 71-year-old mother in a house that's fully paid off. I'm planning to move out within the next few weeks. You can see the post hi…

I'm 14 years old and I have no idea what to do with my emotionally immature mother — My mother constantly tries to argue over anything when talking to me, it could be the smallest thing and she'd instantly find a way to be extremely angry (and take away my devices for nothing). She ha…

Is it normal to feel resentment towards my mother for asking me to get therapy? — I (F17) have been asking my mother to get me into therapy since I was 11, because of some issues I have been going through, both because of my parents and because of peers and personal issues. Each ti…

What the hell do I do? — A few months ago, I caught my partner flirting with some streamer. He then admitted he’d previously emotionally cheated on me with his ex and said he was sorry. I told him I would eventually forgive h…

How can I 28M help my wife 28F better? — Me 28M and my wife 28Fhave been together 6 years. We discovered a couple years ago that she had a hormonal issue due to failed attempts at pregnancy. Basically her body fluctuates her hormone levels v…

my mom read my therapy notes out loud at dinner and now im the “problem child” again — i got home late from work and everyone was already eating, like full family dinner mode for no reason. my mom had that weird fake calm face she does when something’s coming. i sit down, barely even gr…

"Growing up emotionally neglected is like nearly dying of thirst just outside the fenced off fountain of a parent's kindness and interest." — The dichotomy of existing in a home where my mother said, "I love you," and even kisses and hugs before bed or on the way out the door while simultaneously never asking "how are you?" or have any curi…

could card games make the hard talks with my FA more low pressure? — Some context: I've been in this relationship for the past 6 months, and things were great until month 4. Since we were both in relationships at the beginning of last year, I entered this connection …

I despise my narcissistic mother — I (34F) feel a lot of shame even saying this, but I hate my mother (65F). More than that, I hate how she makes me feel. She is hurtful in so many ways. She is disrespectful toward my husband making r…

My (31F) boyfriend (28M) has not invited me to his home after two years of dating, and I don't know how to talk about it. — Hi all! After avoiding "serious" dating in favor of school and career, I met a great guy online just over two years ago. This is the most serious relationship for both of us, and we both have historie…

Getting final closure. — So following from my previous post a week ago. Please read before commenting anything. I'm seeking advice, ranting and just getting closure. [https://www.reddit.com/r/survivinginfidelity/comments/1s4…

My roommate says she can astral project and talks to spirit guides. Should I be concerned? — Hey everyone. I recently moved out of state to work with my roommate (childhood friend), who’s also my boss. Our relationship has had a lot of ups and downs. When I first moved in, she told me she ha…

Parents, especially Indian father allowed my younger brother to be an asshole, now he got out of control and they are putting pressure on me to get him under control again — So what happened is that I am the elder brother and I was raised super-strict, constantly walking on eggshells and my brother would nearly always get away with everything because „he is the little one…

My bf (42M) says I(32F) ruined our relationship by bringing up a small issue. — Hi all! Can you help me out with where this conversation went wrong? I’m hoping I could get some outside perspective on what happened this past evening because it truly left me feeling confused. TL;…

how to tell sibling I'm moving out — Hi all, First time posting for advice so please bear with me. I'm currently living with my sibling I have been living with since I moved out of my hometown for college. I'm working now and we've move…

I [31M] have been seeing a woman [29F] for 5 months, we say I love you and are exclusive, but she still does not want to fully label it. — I am 31M and she is 29F. We have been involved for about 5 months. Basically, from the start I made it clear I had feelings for her. She said she had feelings for me too, but needed time and wanted t…

I think something in my marriage crossed a line and I need outside perspective 31M 31F — I need outside perspective because I feel confused and ashamed. I’m just tired of debating my marriage over and over. My marriage has been in a bad place for almost 2 years. We have the same pattern …

[36M] struggling with emotional burnout vs incompatibility in a 10–11 month relationship with [33F] after repeated small conflicts — I’m writing this because I genuinely need outside perspective. I’ve been going in circles in my own head for a long time and I don’t trust my own judgment anymore. I’m 36M, she’s 33F. We’ve been toge…

Is it a good idea to let my anger out to my ex and tell them all the things they did wrong? — I broke up with my boyfriend a week ago but only recently realised he is probably a narcissist. I've been revisiting a lot of memories and rethinking things and seeing things, all the signs of narciss…

i [29F] have been feeling kinda uneasy about my relationship w my bf [29M] — it's kinda a long story but i will try to summarize it as best as possible. nothing necessarily terrible has been done, but i just have this weird anxiety lately about the stability of my relationship…

A harsh warning about the Avoidant discard: If you sacrificed yourself to be their safety net, burn the bridge the second it ends. — ​I just spent 5 years with an avoidant partner. I spent years acting as their emotional shock absorber and caretaker through endless life crises. In the process of constantly walking on eggshells, lac…

Going no contact with narcissistic mother - rant — TW: SA mention hi all, I hope you're taking care of yourselves and are doing well. this is my frist post. I would really appreciate any advice or if anyone has felt this way before. i often…

Not missing my wife after 1 month of separation — is this normal? — It’s been about a month since my wife and I separated after 5 years of marriage. In the beginning, I was all over the place emotionally — sadness, anxiety, overthinking, the usual. I kept expecting t…

I don’t know what type of couples therapy to seek and need advice — Hi all. My husband has agreed to go to marriage counseling as we are having communication issues and also need mediation on issues because he thinks I’m wrong and I think he’s wrong. My husband strugg…

N Dad wants to divorce my mom after 30+ years because she hasn’t slept with him the week after her mom died — Marked NSFW just to be safe. TW for rape, physical abuse, verbal abuse, even if I don’t go into much detail. Let me know if I marked or did anything wrong! I don’t usually use Reddit. I’m (31F) unfor…

Going to start actually journalling these down. My nice night in disturbed by her as soon as she gets home — I'm already filled to the brim with nerves and anxiety about tomorrow. Long story short, I (28F) booked the day off because she wanted to go to this different place for lunch. She always flips like a …

Can I vent here? I just wanna get it out my chest. DA ex — My ex ghosted me over and over throughout our 8-year relationship. We broke up around 6–7 times. Back then, I didn’t understand attachment styles. I just knew I was anxious and he kept disappearing. …

Am I overthinking this, or do I see signs of OCPD in my girlfriend that could affect our future together? — Hey Reddit, I need some advice and insight from those who might have experienced something similar or have a better understanding of personality disorders. I (31, m) have been with my girlfriend (31…

Is this an example of being raised by narcissists or am i exaggerating? — So sorry this is long but here’s my story. Please advise on how to follow up. For some background: back in December, I had my wedding. It was supposed to be one of the happiest times of my life, but…

I (21F) accidentally called my boyfriend (24m) fat — Hi. Sorry for any typos. It's 1am and I am running off of little sleep. The title sounds terrible, I know. I feel fucking awful. My bf and I got dinner tonight at an AYCE restaurant, so we ate quite…

It really was my moms fault — Exactly as the title says, it was all my mom's fault, and im tired of people(especially other moms)constantly giving her the benefit of the doubt just because she's "traumatized" or "had a hard life" …

Dealing with manipulative father — I’m struggling with how to handle my 78yo dad and could use outside perspective. Recently, he was exposed to Covid and didn’t tell me, and was planning to come stay at my house. I found out beforehan…

I think I want to move out because I’ve lost all respect for my parents. I don’t know what to do anymore. — I’m 22F and I honestly think I’ve reached the point where I want to move out of my parents’ house for good. I grew up with typical Asian parents, so I’m used to strict rules, guilt, and them acting li…

N stepmom, emotionally absent father — I’m 36 now, and I feel like I’m just now fully processing a family dynamic that’s been off my entire life. My mom passed away when I was 4. About 6 months later, my stepmom moved into our home. It wa…

How to act around emotionally abusive parents? — Yesterday I got into a big lesson, from my kind brother, that I should be more patient with my mom, and while she may argue and have mood swings with us and whatnot, that we should still be kind since…

Based on my experience dating a DA, yes this is all “normal” for them. He made it clear we were only to see each other once every two weeks. He didn’t “have capacity” for more than that. The week afte…

I commend how empathetic and caring you clearly are! This sounds just like a sort of extended version of the classic “avoidant trap” so to speak. The other party bends over backwards to try to accommo…

I hear you and I can see that your comment is grounded in past experiences. Fair enough. The only reason I chose to pursue this was because I had new found knowledge. This was the first time I've date…

What does your therapist say to this question? The thing is, there's always some risk involved in learning to know someone, especially as people's attachment styles are not fixed and can fluctuate f…

I'm going through it with a friend and just need some perspective. I'm not sure what type of avoidant attachment they are, just that they have expressed being avoidant. I'm AP, trying to move towards …

Sorry to hear, that sounds like a very difficult situation. Based on my personal experience long-term deactivation is definitely a thing, but I was not long-distance so it looked completely different …

That’s exactly how my last relationship was. I didn’t last long. I even tried to talk to her and explain how it felt like we were stuck in a parent - child dynamic, and how uncomfortable her behavior …

Hi, just wanted to say you're not alone in this. I'm aroace (my attachment style comes to play in platonic relationships) but for the longest time in my life I denied being aromantic because I wanted…

Hi All! I need some advice. My post has not gained any traction anywhere else. I am here to understand what is happening because I feel clouded a little bit in my relationship. We are opposite attachm…

Been there. Its like walking on eggshells around anything political (which is harder than you realize ) give it a shot if you want it might go better. Might not also or she could be like the person I…

Thanks, and you’ve hit the nail on the head. It’s been four months of steadily realising we have very different communication styles. It’s good when it’s good, but he withdraws emotionally when confli…

Today is the birthday of the guy I'm seeing and I'm so excited. He's never had an actual long term relationship and we have had some conversations about taking things as slow as he needs. One big th…

I have and it didn't last beyond three months, mainly because it didn't feel like he was doing anything to deal with that insecurity himself, he just expected me to change my behaviour to accommodate …

Comments: “It’s a trauma bond when you feel worse after interacting with them. When you’re doubting yourself and seeking their validation. When you can’t think for yourself or make decisions on your …

Yes and yes. The outside public world got the “good” version of Nex. It was all for show and attention. I was paranoid in the way of I was always walking on eggshells, fearful of what I may or may not…

I think that would be part of the “walking on eggshells” that people talk about. My therapist said that sometimes the way I’d prod my ex about what was wrong with him might have been me trying to get …

I’m a therapist and strongly agree on consistent boundaries with anyone who has BPD, especially a coparent/ex. Boundaries can be kind/don’t have to be cruel or aggressive, but consistency is key. Migh…

You need to be on r/raisedbynarcissists - this level of fear, control and walking on eggshells is not normal for any relationship.

I can add some of my experience to this topic. I was love bombed and my narc ex took me to the shops to purchase my engagement ring. He paid for it $7000 and did a lot of research on diamonds. He was …

I feel the same way!! I feel like my nex did truly love me. idk I’m confused cause everyone says a narc isn’t capable of loving anyone. At times I think that’s true but deep down I know he loved me. H…

From a guys perspective that's enough flags. At our age we all enough nearly have kids and baggage. Finances, can be hard but managed. But if dating a woman with kids, they are part of her. So that an…

I never got closure. That’s the hard part about avoidants. They can’t acknowledge the feelings - either the pain they’ve caused or the actual pain they themselves are feeling. It all gets stuffed down…

Yes, I’ve been in addiction recovery (opioids) for the past 8 years or so and have been through all the different modes/styles of therapy. Eventually, I was diagnosed with Complex PTSD caused by nar…

Yeah, the situation is indeed bad, she has been living in my tiny two-room apartment all this time and driving me crazy because she's terrified she can't afford any place in this climate after my fath…

Oh my god man, that sounds awful. Some people don't understand the lengths that people will go to take care of their parents. I commend you for sticking to your values at least, but I really hope this…

i totally get that. even when they "try," that feeling of walking on eggshells doesn't just disappear because the room is quiet for a few hours. i spent so much time bracing for the impact that i forg…

Listen. Your mom sounds way worse than my NC N-mother. I thought low contact and gray rocking were good avenues to go down for me and my family also. Then we hit a point of no return. One day my old…

Sound advice mate, appreciate you sharing that. Reckon you're right about not just riding it out - I've been walking on eggshells hoping she'd snap out of it but it's getting worse. Gonna ring her tom…

The right thing would’ve been to have a conversation and discuss. Hear both sides. Him giving you silent treatment and storming off is extremely immature. Anyone who can’t have hard conversations shou…

Honey, this is just the latest topic. The subject is your ex's rage. Reread what you wrote: > I often feel like I’m walking on eggshells around him. He can be very strict and when he gets angry he…

This guy did you a massive favor. I think maybe you are misinterpreting "I miss being single" when it's really "I miss being able to do things like randomly stop at a store on the way home or go out w…

If you were already walking on eggshells around him it sounds like the trash took itself out.

I can't with all these people going "that's an inside thought" what a load of bull... Does everything need to be shared with a partner? No. Is mentioning that "I sometimes miss only having to think o…

I think it’s reasonable to miss certain things. My husband and I have both commented that there are aspects of being single we miss sometimes However If one of those reasons is “I miss not walking o…

You missed being single because you were walking on eggshells around this man. It’s the best birthday gift you could have gotten. Love yourself enough to never accept a rotten partner.

There was nothing wrong with voicing that you missed being single, there is something wrong with walking on eggshells. His overreaction is an indication of how his insecurities poisoned your relations…

Listen.. be glad the trash took itself out. You do not feel like you are walking on eggshells in a healthy relationship. Adults aren’t “strict” with another adult they are in a relationship with. Only…

“I often feel like I’m walking on eggshells around him. He can be very strict and when he gets angry he sometimes gives silent treatment or holds things over me for a long time” I was ready to tell y…

FYI: the dramatic outbursts and silent treatment never stop as the relationship progresses. I know people after 25 years of marriage who are still dealing with emotional rollercoasters and walking o…

seems like he gave you the perfect birthday gift...leaving. After walking on eggshells to not having to do that, it's life changing. He sounds like an asshole.

>I mean yes and no.  yeah i think the longer a relationship goes and the more joint responsibilities you take on together (home, pets, kids, etc), the more reasonable it is to have times when you mis…

I read your story twice. You are asking how the group would react to what you told him. Everybody would look at it through a different lens of their experience. From my perspective, the best way to …

OP - here's the problem: you were already rugsweeping this toxic relationship. You said: >"I’m walking on eggshells around him. He can be very strict and when he gets angry he sometimes gives silen…

“I often feel like I’m walking on eggshells around him. He can be very strict and when he gets angry he sometimes gives silent treatment or holds things over me for a long time.” It probably doesn’t …

I’ve been with my husband for 13 years it’s normal to want personal space and we do our best to give eachother that. But he is my safe space. He is the person i can let my authentic self shine thro…

This. I hope OP takes what your said to heart. The walking on eggshells is a major stressor that you should not feel in a safe, healthy environment/relationship. The silent treatment also is a major s…

What do you mean by walking around on eggshells? Can you describe this dynamic more? I don’t know why you would say this to your partner, and so I’m trying to figure out if you regularly say hurtful t…

I mean, what did you expect? I understand your explanation but that's a terrible thing to say if you want to remain in a relationship If you wanted to talk about the things you wanted to improve in y…

As I was reading this, I thought maybe you were given a unique gift on your birthday, because he seems very immature and controlling. You wrote," During our phone call I tried explaining that the reas…

Like a lot of posts on this page, it lacks definitive context. How is he strict? What makes you feel like you’re walking on eggshells? Is he restricting you from seeing friends, family, etc.? What wer…