safely

Is there more you aren't saying? This feels like a hostile living situation when it's coupled with the example of them yelling at you for overhearing their tv. That's an inappropriately aggressive res…

Please guide me in learning infrastructure automation — I currently manage a few servers running some ecommerce sites (WordPress) and some custom PHP based applications (Vanilla PHP, and Laravel) on DigitalOcean. My setup is pretty basic and consists of *…

How Liquibase Simplifies Schema Management — If you've ever deployed schema changes manually, you know the pain: tracking SQL scripts, guessing what's applied where, and praying nothing breaks in prod. I recently wrote a post on how **Liquibase…

Set out to launch my first e-commerce brand, feedback? — Looking for advice on a health and wellness business, A transdermal nootropic patch designed for biohackers, deep workers, and anyone looking for clean, all-day cognitive enhancement without the stim…

The post-abuse life is rarely worth it — Losing your youth to abuse, coming out extremely fragmented and almost disabled when it comes to forming relationships, chronic illness that prevents you from work that prevents you from money that pr…

Some Pointers after 12 Years of Meditation — Meditation is an invisible skill, which makes it especially prone to confusion and obfuscation. I wanted to jot down some pointers and opinions about meditation that have served me at one point or an…

People are always shocked when abuse happens in "good families"...... but that's kind of the point. — I saw the latest news about the Duggars & how the mom was recently arrested and charged with child endangerment. What really stood out to me wasn’t even the charges, it was how many people were shocke…

I flew across the country alone at 19, and they followed me. — Hi everyone. I'm unsure of who will remember of my two or so posts detailing my potential escape and plans to have an emergency move from Alabama to California, but I did it! This was my first time f…

I (20M) haven't slept in my own bed in almost 2 months because of my (19F) girlfriend — We have been together for almost 3 years and both go to the same college. We live in dorms on opposite sides of campus. Lately I feel like I don’t have any time to myself anymore. If we’re both free, …

My (27f) roommate (25 nb) keeps masturbating with their door open — We share a very small apartment. I moved in around a year and a half ago after they posted the listing online, and we didn’t know each other before hand. We mostly keep to ourselves, as much as two pe…

where do i go from here? — hi friends, i’m not sure where to go to heal. i posted in a different thread about the situation leading up to my breakup with my now ex: https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/s/UQCEcqeyRU today is the…

I’m fairly certain I’m being abused, this last week has been ROUGH. Lives in MY home, I’m scared. — I’ve been in a relationship (me F34; he is M34) with this person for 10 years. Relationship never went anywhere, clearly. He lives in MY home and I’m afraid he won’t leave peacefully. I’ve been slowl…

NEW STUDY — Folks planning a psychedelic experience this year sought for a $250 entirely online Yale research study! — The Powers Lab at Yale University is recruiting people who are planning to use a psychedelic this year for a fully online study that measures how psychedelics affect basic perception and learning usin…

The moment when everything clicked after the discard. Does this pattern strongly point to NPD? — Hey everyone. After a recent brutal and totally blindsiding discard by someone who I thought loved me, Im trying to understand what I experienced (almost 1 year relationship and attempt at reconnectio…

Free self help book and romance novel — FREE FREE FREE I have 2 self help books to get rid of toxic traits and 1 romance novel, the shaving mirror series and the cabin that fit, romance novel. message me with the book you want and an email…

Three weeks into taking space after the breakup and I’m already feeling much better. Here’s what I’ve been focusing on. — My partner and I broke up about three weeks ago now, and I’m already feeling a lot better about things. What I have NOT done: demonize him, villainize him, try to tell myself that the whole relation…

Name a quirk, trait, or something else about you that you believe was caused by trauma from your family — Mine was magical thinking. If I am being honest I still catch myself doing it and then I stop myself. But I remember as a child telling myself a classmate would suddenly want to date me if I could pla…

Delayed Response In Processing Events — Hello, this is my first post. During my contact experience with a being/NHI (June 2025-current) I have begun to notice a pattern that I became aware of as of a few months ago, involving processin…

Conveying the psychedelic experience to the (potentially curious) "uninitiated" - how do you do it? — First the question, then the context: how do you most accurately convey the psychedelic experience to someone who has never taken psychedelics (may or may not have been in an altered state due to othe…

Am I actually losing out? — Looking for ways to build my life up (hobbies, activities, places to travel in EU etc). I found out my partner of 6 years was having an (at least) emotional affair with a coworker since January. Best…

Why Don't Quality Men Seem To Want To Be With Me? — I post alot on here about meeting men and figuring out what's not working for me with dating and relationships. I recently met with a friend whom my friend Paul passed on my number to and we've met an…

can u guys give me some tips. — I believe in manifestation, it's one of the first thing that made a lot of sense to me. we become what we think, what we speak, what we do. and tbh sometimes things happens and i literally don't reali…

The dreaded day has finally come — I've been low contact with them for years but one of my literal nightmares has come to fruition, dealing with my parent's hoarder house. They're in their 70s, increasing mobility issues, and have fill…

Tip on how you can report your abuse when you have "easily triggered" parents which makes it difficult to tell secrets to parents? — How to tell someone about abuse safely if you have social anxiety If you have social anxiety, selective mutism, or just find talking about serious stuff terrifying, here’s a step-by-step way to tell …

Living with all the things he can’t remember — I saw a post about a guy getting kicked out of a comedy show for making sexist/homophobic comments and his date leaving with him. And all I could think was: Oh shit. I used to be that date. We (30F…

Tramadol Injection advice needed!! — Tramadol injection help please! Hello I have water for injection (ampules) I have Tramadol capsules (powder) I have sterile needles I have cigarette filters, and I ordered 0.22ug filters from Te…

Would it be reckless to leave my family and go to a shelter with little money? — I, 30F, am reaching a point where I cannot live with my parents much longer. I barely have anything to my name (not enough for rent) and cannot drive. I wish I could turn off my feelings and endure my…

28 F 38 M - Husband has asked me to stop taking my antidepressants. How do I do this safely? — Hi, I’m 28 F 7 months post partum and have struggled with PPD and PPA. I have been on sertraline since Bub was just over a month old and while it has helped my mental health massively I have completel…

how do i safely move out of home, and how do i afford it? — i, 19f, live with an extremely emotionally and physically abusive mom. i cannot stand living at home, it is incredibly stressful and damaging for me. i want to leave, but i don’t know how i would affo…

my parents hate me for having sex — I want to preface this by saying two things. 1. I’ve never posted on Reddit before, so sorry if I use it wrong or get confused with the layout or replying. 2. This is just one story about my parents.…

I (F23) have been with my partner (M24) for four years and he keeps being unfaithful — Early on, I made mistakes and was unfaithful, but I haven’t cheated since. Recently, I discovered he has been cheating on me both physically and emotionally with other women for the past few years. He…

[48F] Planning a secret exit from my highly volatile partner [56M] of 10 years. Seeking advice on safely executing a remote breakup under the guise of a work trip. — **Background:** I have been with my partner, "P", for 10 years, and the relationship has completely drained me emotionally and financially. P is a severe alcoholic who drinks about a liter of vodka a …

Best type of therapy for CPTSD from age 2-41 while still in a severely abusive relationship? — I posted this in r/therapy but not sure if anyone will have an answer so posting here in case anyone here has experience with this. I have just recently become aware that my marriage of 17 years was…

Please help us — When my wife and I first got together, her mother was very welcoming. She spent time with us, smoked with us, and seemed supportive. Around that time, my wife (who was 16) wanted to become emancipated…

If someone were to say "How can I be there for you?" What would your answer be? — Mine would be "Presence and vulnerability". I want to feel safely connected to someone.

Drawing triggered a severe flashback — why? — Hi, I think I might have CPTSD, and I’m trying to understand something that recently happened to me. I’ve been relatively stable lately, so for the first time in years I tried drawing again. Suddenly…

What kind of therapy or tools recommended for my problem — Hello everyone, I'm trying to keep this short, I believe I've identified a problem I have that I would like help with. That I cant solve on my own and keeps persisting. I'm aware there are different …

Hello, I am a teen and I have a lot of questions about lucid dreaming before I do it for the first time. — Just last night I remembered about lucid dreaming before I went to sleep and I watched a video, however I was way too scared to do it. I have quite a lot more info now like don't kill anybody, not rec…

Lonely again — i want to let you go but i dont mive on. I still save you in myblife and i still get hurt every time i know its life death or freedom when i loose you. You dont sober up. Your with other people whonk…

Car accident (moving out) — I’m not sure what to do I just got into a car accident yesterday coming home from work and, it scared me it was my first one ever like I thought I was ok and these group of girls in their mid 20s just…

Help 🫩🩵 — I’m not sure what to do I just got into a car accident yesterday coming home from work and, it scared me it was my first one ever like I thought I was ok and these group of girls in their mid 20s just…

Threw away hopefully my last pack of cigarettes and am pondering quitting smoking weed — My grandfather passed away last Monday, and his funeral was yesterday. And all this week, I've basically been running on adrenaline followed by deep exhaustion having to deal with funeral arrangements…

Apple Location Sharing — My Nmom asked me to turn on location sharing over a year ago when I was traveling across the country and at the time I rationalized it as her just wanting to see that I made it to my new state safely,…

Am I wrong? — Needing advice. I’m a 33 yo mom of two small children. We have a dog and I have been fostering other dogs on and off for the past year. Our dog is very gentle with our kids and has never hurt them. Wh…

2 years later — I havent been on the subreddit for such a long time. In a weird way so much has changed and so little. 2 years ago my ex broke up with me, her reasoning being: she didnt want to drag me down in her d…

Me [23M] and my GF [23F] are having a disagreement and we need your thoughts. — Me \[23M\] and my GF \[23F\] have been together for about 2 years now. Ever since we have been together, she has asked me on at least 50 occassions if I would be up to try having sex with a man, somet…

I’m stuck — I’m not sure what to do I just got into a car accident yesterday coming home from work and, it scared me it was my first one ever like I thought I was ok and these group of girls in their mid 20s just…

He broke no contact!? — Hi, sorry this is a bit long but I think everything I said is necessary, please help a girl out. Me and ex of 1.5 years just broke up 6 days ago. Some background info: I am a college senior and he is …

What to do with my bio dad — I 34F have a bio dad M55 (let’s call him Bob) who I did not grow up with. I grew up with my step dad M52 (let’s call him Jared). I did not find out that the man I grew up with (Jared) was not my biolo…

Hello I just had the weirdest dream and I don't know how to look up my specific type of dream and was so shocked I decided to come here and write. I remember going to sleep around 12:30pm after wakin…

So.. id classify myself as a relatively spiritual person.. over the last few months ive tried meditating 5 or so times.. ive had sleep paralysis about 5 times as well in my life.. more so in the last …

Hi, sorry for the long response but please bear with me. TLDR at the bottom. You are slightly correct, but drug addiction posts will also more than likely be removed. 1- There is actually another…

Rolling back an LLM at OpenAI scale isn’t like redeploying a web app on Vercel. You’re talking global load balancers, multi-region infrastructure, model sharding, GPU fleet management, and system prom…

Hey. Interesting write up, it has some good references and shows some good understanding on modern software security. Though there are some parts I would critique for feedback: >Another layer that …

You're welcome. I'm glad you found it relatable. I have a friend whose husband has those same outward qualities you quoted and once she was telling me that he gets upset that she has all her friends a…

I'm super skeptical when it comes to relying on an AI (as an AI engineer who knows how unreliable and misleading AI can get). But I'm someone who finds it hard to open up and tell people my deepest …

I know this is an old post, I was searching FA on this sub and yours really piqued my interest. I don’t think I was ever that much of a FA except for when I was a teenager, I had childhood trauma and …

Stuck around birth family for three days, came away with loads of goodies of course but at the expense of my sanity. Holidays are superficial commericalized bull, people are stupid, unhealed careg…

Avoidants typically harshly assert distance when their subconscious feelings are coming the closest to being exposed though. They will also often keep people they have genuine feelings for in their or…

Feels like safely sinking into myself... like I am a cave of warmth and everything I need protecting me from the dangers of the outside world.

I’m FA with some DA tendencies, when I would deactivate it would look similar to what you described. Mine however used to last days at times. At first I didn’t realize I was doing it, I just thought I…

As a single mom, we are lonely - which is why we like to text. It’s a form of communication we can do safely without needing to find care for a child. I think that if you personally don’t want to text…

It's pretty common for people to text me the same day/night after a date. I think what you do is fine!  My person and I had sex on the first date, and said we'd see each other again before I left the…

I’m so sorry! I know how impossibly impossible getting over this feels - been there. But do you know how smart it was of you to block because you can finally work your way out through the mess! Knowin…

If we stay with the whole sign chart, Saturn in Pisces in the 4th can signify a childhood where the child was invisible. Even quiet, you should never have been overlooked. To be both abused and favo…

okay , holy fock. Cuz just few days ago i said the same stuff to a friend and we mildly agreed. How did you just popped up after ı realized this?? we maybe even have a special system for each that wor…

Get help. As a therapist, I can safely say you are not the worst person I have had come in to treatment by a long shot. And I am not even counting when I work In Patient nor any of the convicted fel…

I feel stupid. Why can't I find someone who makes me feel loved? I keep giving him free passes and then regretting it. I thought maybe he wasn't it into birthdays so I didn't make a big deal about i…

My husband also got aggressive after his affair. I called my local DV shelter for support. I got counseling with them and got on the list for their pro bono lawyer. The counselor helped me get out saf…

He's also of the age where mental disorders will hit men - schizo, psychosis etc Chatgpt will be a trigger for those if he is susceptible. And it sounds like it is triggering it - the illusions of g…

in my freshman year of college, one of my friends was firmly in the "ecstasy eats holes in your brain" camp. my girlfriend at the time and i explained to him that there's a lot more nuance to trying s…

Finished talk therapy years ago. I was very proactive in working through as much as I could. Practical stuff is a lot more difficult to do safely.

More driving isn't a big deal to me, as long as you don't expect me to do all the driving for you. Eg you know how to get around, etc. Which it sounds like you do. Only you can sort out the rejection…

That may happen because sometimes if you meet a partner that actually treats you with respect and love, then you realize how your parents treat you is not OK. Also, having a partner can give many peop…

This is a complicated and delicate question but I believe I am one of the most qualified to answer because I have bipolar and have pushed the limits with a lot of recs including MDMA and LSD but I hav…

I hope you have a good lawyer. If you co-own the home, he can't ask you to stay out of it. Focus on yourself and getting divorced safely and fairly (fair to you). You looked at his phone and lied. Bu…

I dunno why you're so befuddled, people don't exist in a vacuum. If someone is friends with shit people then that demonstrates bad judgement at best or that they're secretly also a shit person at wors…

100%. I showed my fiancè this title and he was disgusted without even reading the story. No amount of context could make this okay!! Your "husband" has disrespected you completely and I'm sure it's n…

You manifest through intention. In the future, there is a point where if you sustain intention on it, it will come to fruit. Leading up to that moment, you/your environment will test you and prepare y…

It really could have been hormones more than anything. Try salt in all four corners, you can use salt lamps too. They are pretty and not expensive. Hang an iron horseshoe over the doorway if you can d…

> How do I deal with this? You get the hell away from him, the instant you can do so safely. He's *dangerous*. Does he have a psychiatrist?

Please move out immediately. Get your family and friends to help and do not let him know you’re doing it until you leave. Are you on a lease together? It’ll need to be broken. This is a dangerous situ…

Honey, you are NOT safe, nor trained to handle mental illness. Sympathy is not enough & you are seriously underreacting to his erratic & deeply troubling behavior. Make a plan to safely get out o…

> He deletes text messages because he’s afraid I’ll get upset. I used to check his phone occasionally, mostly out of boredom, and once found messages where his mom talked badly about me—he didn’t even…

I always had trouble falling asleep. I would stay up really late and my parents were okay with it (I’m talking like when I was 6). Around maybe 7, 8 yrs old I very distinctly remember experiencing the…

I think I could safely use diaphragm, but I think it would be difficult. Hormonal IUD no, copper ones not sure. I'll ask. Thank you. 

where do I get shrooms safely in Canada ?

So last night I went to a second date with this girl, everything went well, lots of fun, started talking about deeper stuff, physical touches, she laughed, I laughed. We spent hours together doing dif…

This is the literal reasoning why i'm child-free, because I sat down, and asked myself that question "am I financially, physically, mentally, and emotionally in a position to have kids?", and 1 second…

This is so sad to read. I don't think there is anything you can do to avoid abusers, the signs are not always there and many of them are expert liars and manipulators. At least you got out of it safel…

Thanks for your answer its really kind <3 i did thankfully get out safely. It's crazy how it happens, I never EVER thought I'd end up in that situation. Tbh, dating was the worst part of my life (wh…

Healing is a privilege. If you are privileged enough to have the opportunity, you have no excuse not to do it, but not everyone will get the chance. It's so much about luck also, because I believe hea…

Ditch that narcissist ASAP! As a late middle age male I say this. You are an empath being worked on by an unrepentant narcissist. It sounds like you are already ‘grey rock-ing’ him and emotionally che…

it's capitalism. before you say I'm off my rocker, hear me out In the 70s, 80s, even 90s you could in theory leave your abusive family and go work at a gas station, be a server at a dinner, a sales …

Patricia Crittenden created the Dynamic Maturational Model of attachment (which is really interesting stuff!) and describes attachment patterns as adaptations to our developmental environment - the ar…

Bring it up almost exactly how you did here. If you aren't trying to accuse him of doing it intentionally, just state that plainly before going into the fact that you want to have a healthy talk about…

>How is it always dangerous and stupid if you trust your partner? >I have accidentally choked out my partner before ... 🤦🏻‍♀️ https://findanexpert.unimelb.edu.au/news/99230-choking-during-sex--m…

OP you were strangled, I would leave him, he doesn’t respect you enough to do those actions safely not good!!

Strangulation is the number one indicator that a woman in a DV situation will be murdered by her partner ( https://www.domesticshelters.org/articles/identifying-abuse/strangulation-is-the-highest-pred…