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r/DecidingToBeBetterUpdated 30 days ago
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Recommend podcasts / videos about healthy male roles and positive masculinity

I'm a therapist and I'd highly recommend healthygamergg's content for this sort of thing. I'll link some relevant videos of his below. [Stop Being a Low Value Man](https://youtu.be/or6A1Pl04ss) …

r/DecidingToBeBettercomment3/8/2026
Book recommendations

Book recommendations — Hi all, I facilitate meetings for our non profit in the Seattle area. I want to do a little book club on the side outside of our mental health meetings. Can I get a recommendation in a fantasy s…

r/AsianMasculinitypost3/8/2026
Recommend podcasts / videos about healthy male roles and positive masculinity

Recommend podcasts / videos about healthy male roles and positive masculinity — Early thirties male and I feel my brain needs some intel on being a better male role model. Emphasis on role model. Things I never learned or observed growing up. Can you recommend a podcast host or …

r/DecidingToBeBetterpost3/8/2026
NYC - AM Meetup 03/22 Sunday.

NYC - AM Meetup 03/22 Sunday. — A few of us from the community are hosting our 3rd Asian Masculinity meetup in NYC. It’s a small, in-person group where we talk about things like career growth, business, dating, fitness, and life in…

r/AsianMasculinitypost3/16/2026
Did your partner/ex cheat with someone who had traits they previously said they disliked or hated?

Did your partner/ex cheat with someone who had traits they previously said they disliked or hated? — How do you process the contradiction? I look back at all the times she told me she hated tattoos and will never be with someone who has them. Also very toxic masculinity and harsh or rough voices were…

r/survivinginfidelitypost3/19/2026
Why are my intimate relationships so rough? (unhealthy relationship w/ the masculine?)

Why are my intimate relationships so rough? (unhealthy relationship w/ the masculine?) — I have a pattern of being in highly codependent relationships and usually I’m the one displaying avoidant toxic traits, and I can feel very strong masculinity even as I identify as female. My current …

r/AskAstrologerspost3/22/2026
What haircut would suit my features best?

What haircut would suit my features best? — I used to have long hair, that i put in a bun but i recently got tired of it and decided to cut in to a medium length. Now i dont have any styles that would maximize masculinity but also suit my face.…

r/AsianMasculinitypost3/23/2026
How to cry?

How to cry? — Im a 34yo man. Last time I cried was 20 years ago. Yeah I can't cry. I've been through break-ups, many people I loved died and my face didnt have a reaction. My childhood was stressful and traumati…

r/therapypost3/27/2026
The ACTUAL reality regarding interracial dating for Asian men in the West

The ACTUAL reality regarding interracial dating for Asian men in the West — I wasn't intending to make this post but was forced to after this post to set the record straight after the below doomer information was posted [https://www.reddit.com/r/AsianMasculinity/comments/1s…

r/AsianMasculinitypost4/1/2026
My story, just have a need to vent somewhere

My story, just have a need to vent somewhere — 25 years old desperately trying to finish his uni to maybe finally have some independence, crying in the bathroom stall at the internship again. I guess I'll just put my story here to cope. Througho…

r/EmotionalNeglectpost4/1/2026
The importance of Asian male role models

The importance of Asian male role models — I'm a long time lurker and I'd like to share my perspective as a half Asian millennial guy in the US. Having strong Asian male role models has been key to my development as a person. My dad was Chine…

r/AsianMasculinitypost4/1/2026
41M - I think I'll be single for rest of life and have lost the motivation to date

41M - I think I'll be single for rest of life and have lost the motivation to date — I dated a lot during my 30s and had high hopes that I'd eventually find the right one, but here I am at age 41. I read this thread from another AM and I think I'm headed down the same way: [https://…

r/AsianMasculinitypost4/3/2026
Seeking advice about my wife's actions

Seeking advice about my wife's actions — Seeking advice I’m posting here because I need honest input from people who understand limerence/crush dynamics, especially if you’ve experienced it while in a committed relationship or from the part…

r/survivinginfidelitypost4/5/2026
Narcissistic Abuse

Narcissistic Abuse — TL;DR follows. Two years ago, I met a girl that acted cute, cheerful and sweet all the time. She used to talk about how she does not like swearwords nor smoking because it's bad for the health and sh…

r/BreakUpspost4/5/2026
Grew up in a healthy home but was traumatized by a “friend” at school, having trouble feeling valid in it.

Grew up in a healthy home but was traumatized by a “friend” at school, having trouble feeling valid in it. — To elaborate on the title, my parents have been and still are amazing and supportive people, and I am eternally grateful to have them. For instance I’m a trans woman, and ever since I came out they’ve…

r/CPTSDpost4/6/2026
Alone

Alone — I was raised by narcissists. They abused me in multiple different ways, did not allow me to see my friends, blamed me for things they literally did, encouraged me to harm myself, stole my identity, an…

r/raisedbynarcissistspost4/6/2026
Does finasteride weaken Mars energy?

Does finasteride weaken Mars energy? — I’ve been considering taking finasteride for hair loss, but I’m a bit concerned about how it might relate to Mars energy from an astrology/nakshatra perspective. From what I understand biologically, …

r/vedicastrologypost4/7/2026
Sex and Power - is it my trauma or just me?

Sex and Power - is it my trauma or just me? — I (M29) know that I'm not alone in feeling destroyed by my trauma, I have deep feelings of being damaged, broken and despairing. I think it's difficult for people to understand how much pain (in all t…

r/CPTSDpost4/7/2026
What are your thoughts on the Victorian ideal of masculinity?

What are your thoughts on the Victorian ideal of masculinity? — Perhaps best captured by Rudyard Kipling’s If- and William Ernest Henley’s Invictus, the Victorian era’s ideal of masculinity was heavily inspired by stoicism, promoting self-discipline, self-reliance…

r/Stoicismpost4/10/2026
I (22M) have a major crush on a co-worker turned friend (F19) but the situation is weird and i don't have anyone to talk about this. What would you guys do in this situation?

I (22M) have a major crush on a co-worker turned friend (F19) but the situation is weird and i don't have anyone to talk about this. What would you guys do in this situation? — *(Sorry if my grammar isn't correct, unfortunately English is not my native language. )* So i (22M) have a crush on a co-worker (F19) that has slowly become one of my best friends. We have been w…

r/relationship_advicepost4/10/2026
Strong aversion to and fear of masculine energy…need help

Strong aversion to and fear of masculine energy…need help — As an adult I’m still really struggling with integrating masculine energy into my life in a healthy way, both my own and other peoples. I seem to kind of shut down around any kind of masculine presen…

r/energy_workpost4/13/2026
Bi-Weekly Thread - Advice for Relationship/Friendship/Dating/Breakup

Being a man has nothing to do with any of this. Subscribing to toxic masculinity ideals will only do more harm to you. Odds are you are experiencing limerence which is not uncommon with anxious atta…

r/AnxiousAttachmentcomment9/17/2025
Bi-Weekly Thread - Advice for Relationship/Friendship/Dating/Breakup

I got married to a man whom I had met online and we had only met each other about 2 times in person before marriage due to it being a very long distance relationship ( between two countries ) I only …

r/AnxiousAttachmentcomment12/17/2025
What do secure bids for connection and co-regulation look like?

I'm female, and I can't imagine how much harder this would be for me if I also had to deal with the societal pressure not to be vulnerable that men get. I know you're being glib here but the pressure …

r/attachment_theorycomment1/15/2026
We live in a culture that glorifies self-sufficiency and punishes inter-dependence and needs. That impacts what we start labelling as anxious attachment, and how we are encouraged to heal.

I would like to note that I do understand what you are saying and get how Society plays a role. I think if anything, what I take issue with is its a little too black and white. That Instagram post is …

r/AnxiousAttachmentcomment2/11/2026
Daily sticky thread for rants, raves, celebrations, advice and more! New? Start here!

It probably has some origin in what you say because I remember hearing shit like this when I was young, but nowadays it's mainly used by followers of toxic masculinity to try to assert they are in a b…

r/datingoverthirtycomment2/12/2026
Daily sticky thread for rants, raves, celebrations, advice and more! New? Start here!

This feels like it could be the subject of an article or video. A deep dive into this show and how it's portraying healthy masculinity would be cool

r/datingoverthirtycomment2/12/2026
Daily sticky thread for rants, raves, celebrations, advice and more! New? Start here!

I’m telling you, you look unhappy or neutral in expression in most of the pics you shared. You seem like you have a full life, I’d encourage you to take more candid photos (or have others take them) w…

r/datingoverthirtycomment2/14/2026
Daily sticky thread for rants, raves, celebrations, advice and more! - February 24, 2026

Generally speaking, men being friends with other men often entails not talking much about feelings and just hanging out and doing stuff together. Men also deal with emotions differently than women. F…

r/datingoverthirtycomment2/24/2026
Daily sticky thread for rants, raves, celebrations, advice and more! - March 06, 2026

Do you tell them you’re waiting for them to let you know to meet? Also, curious if then you only text and don’t suggest a phone call? I’m assuming if all the man is going to do is text, he will ask me…

r/datingoverthirtycomment3/6/2026
Recommend podcasts / videos about healthy male roles and positive masculinity

- Jamal Burkmar (general creator) - on various short & long form platforms - Therese Lee (youtuber) @theresehlee - Abigail Thorne (youtuber) @PhilosophyTube - Kat Blaque (youtuber) @KatBlaque - @za…

r/DecidingToBeBettercomment3/8/2026
Recommend podcasts / videos about healthy male roles and positive masculinity

Meet the male influencers fighting back against Andrew Tate and toxic masculinity | British GQ https://share.google/Q3bch2yx2YBssiSLm

r/DecidingToBeBettercomment3/8/2026
Recommend podcasts / videos about healthy male roles and positive masculinity

Art of Manliness is a great source. Specifically [this article](https://www.artofmanliness.com/character/behavior/semper-virilis-a-roadmap-to-manhood-in-the-21st-century/). Positive masculinity. So…

r/DecidingToBeBettercomment3/8/2026
Recommend podcasts / videos about healthy male roles and positive masculinity

Jameela Jamil has been posting stuff on her instagram about healthy masculinity. I also HIGHLY recommend reading "The Will to Change" by Bell Hooks. As men, we can really learn a lot from the feminist…

r/DecidingToBeBettercomment3/9/2026
[Prove Me Wrong] Bruce Lee was the last English speaking Asian that represented us well

Unpopular opinion, but I don’t know why we put Kpop stars on a pedestal when they’re perceived as the opposite of masculinity in the West.

r/AsianMasculinitycomment3/10/2026
[Prove Me Wrong] Bruce Lee was the last English speaking Asian that represented us well

MMA is taking off in Asia but mainstream media isn't interested because it perpetuates "toxic masculinity". 🙄 K-pop does well because there's an entire industry that grooms them from middle school …

r/AsianMasculinitycomment3/10/2026
[Prove Me Wrong] Bruce Lee was the last English speaking Asian that represented us well

Did you see my edit? Guys like faker would lean more towards the kpop sphere than traditional masculinity. Many fans treat T1 like a kpop group with how they market their players

r/AsianMasculinitycomment3/10/2026
[Prove Me Wrong] Bruce Lee was the last English speaking Asian that represented us well

You should unpack why you think that’s the only form of masculinity that you value, could very well be due to western brainwashing. Nothing wrong with this form of masculinity of course, but it’s a na…

r/AsianMasculinitycomment3/10/2026
[Prove Me Wrong] Bruce Lee was the last English speaking Asian that represented us well

Kpop and kdramas have redefined masculinity and showed the women of the west what they have been missing out on.

r/AsianMasculinitycomment3/10/2026
What are the most infuriating sentences your ex has said to you during or after the breakup?

Understand, yeah this person has issues too and has never been in a long term relationship. He also views sex as a way to get validation about his masculinity

r/BreakUpscomment3/10/2026
[Prove Me Wrong] Bruce Lee was the last English speaking Asian that represented us well

You need to broaden your search and your definition of masculinity. You can't base it solely on the Asian men that represented us well to white people or even English speakers because that overvalues …

r/AsianMasculinitycomment3/10/2026
[Prove Me Wrong] Bruce Lee was the last English speaking Asian that represented us well

Not sure why you’re focusing so much on the “speaks english” part of all this. Bruce Lee grew up in Hong Kong, where English is often taught/lots of British influence/etc. Then he moved to the US for …

r/AsianMasculinitycomment3/10/2026
[Prove Me Wrong] Bruce Lee was the last English speaking Asian that represented us well

Explain to me how successful, rich, gentlemanly men who are secure in their masculinity and are strongly preferred by women all around the world is somehow so triggering to you

r/AsianMasculinitycomment3/10/2026
Tips for attracting left-leaning men?

Politics today IS a good view precisely because it’s non-ideological. The question around politics today that goes unsaid is around the use of violence. One party is “pro violence against the scapeg…

r/datingoverfortycomment3/10/2026
Does anyone subconsciously think about them?

man, I've been feeling the same as of late, it's unreal. today especially. me and her were together for almost 4 years. domestic. marriage talks at some point. it's about to be 3 years since she walke…

r/ExNoContactcomment3/11/2026
Behavior of Asian boys vs. White boys?

Generalisations about ethnicity can not be made from these observations. Asian boys are influenced by cultural norms and parenting practices to point them towards communal habits. White boys differ …

r/AsianMasculinitycomment3/13/2026
[Prove Me Wrong] Bruce Lee was the last English speaking Asian that represented us well

here's what I will say Bruce Lee was unique. Through a combination of charisma, timing, and his amazing skills, he has left an enduring legacy. This will likely be true forever. I wouldn't say he's t…

r/AsianMasculinitycomment3/13/2026
Dating as an Asian Australian man

It's kind of a strange phenomenon with incels. It's a group where manhood is defined by sexual activity. On one hand, they are stifled by the more conservative understanding of masculinity yet they wa…

r/AsianAmericancomment3/13/2026
Dating as someone between cultures

Dating across cultures often involves more than just language or shared interests. Culture shapes how people express respect, how relationships progress, and what roles partners expect from each other…

r/datingoverthirtycomment3/13/2026
Unable to forget what I (20F) saw on my bf’s (24M) phone

This is above reddit's paygrade. You need to take the time, when you've calmed down, to have more conversations. Something is going on with him and he doesn't feel like he can come to you. He's at…

r/relationship_advicecomment3/13/2026
Unable to forget what I (20F) saw on my bf’s (24M) phone

What stands out to me is his maturity level in how he handled it. Instead of just owning it from the start which would have been a simple, normal conversation he denied it until you literally showed h…

r/relationship_advicecomment3/14/2026
[Prove Me Wrong] Bruce Lee was the last English speaking Asian that represented us well

Rain always had a good balance between masculinity and softness, too. Dude was one of the OGs of that duality in K-pop.

r/AsianMasculinitycomment3/15/2026
The "Manosphere"

Well said, weps. The 'manosphere' is mostly a grift I feel. With most men finding worth in their careers in previous generations, and with current generations being disenfranchised from gainful employ…

r/Stoicismcomment3/15/2026
The "Manosphere"

this is such a weird argument, it’s basically just manosphere talking points with the word “society” swapped in so it doesn’t sound as obviously misogynistic lol. you’re talking about the problems m…

r/Stoicismcomment3/15/2026
My (M38) wife (F34) has been very quiet since a conversation we had of why I love her. Confused about her silence.

This is called 'losing frame' and its dependent on their compassion, once you lose the frame of masculinity, you lose respect, she will become more quick to anger, quick to frustration, annoyed when y…

r/relationship_advicecomment3/16/2026
Asian Golden Gloves Boxer Fighting YNs in DC and Baltimore!

Boxing is a thinking mans sport, you have to think in there at all times. Its a fight and a chess match and a poker game. You have to be very precise in the ring as well as out of the ring. I am lo…

r/AsianMasculinitycomment3/16/2026
r/AsianAmericancomment3/16/2026
Asians in Sci-fi

an asian female captain with a white last name, isn't exactly a shining endorsement for asian masculinity in the whatever century that was in

r/AsianMasculinitycomment3/17/2026
Asian Golden Gloves Boxer Fighting YNs in DC and Baltimore!

Boxing is an incredibly difficult and sophisticated sport. And young boxers are often incredibly gifted intellectually as well as physically. That's not the point. It results in brain damage for many…

r/AsianMasculinitycomment3/17/2026
Why does Japanese video games and anime have white protagonists?

Uncomfortable truth: if AMs were more misogynistic and aggressive like the Arabs and Latinos, we would not have had Joy Luck AFs becoming the representatives of our race. It’s not too late to right th…

r/AsianMasculinitycomment3/17/2026
Did any of your parents purposely scare you?

Nfather is really insecure in his masculinity and he tried to soothe that by intimidating my brothers and I. He became extremely depressed and angry when we all got older and big enough that he couldn…

r/raisedbynarcissistscomment3/17/2026
The "Manosphere"

I think the unfortunate piece of this that is the foundation for the manosphere is just that they are almost all grifting and doing so with that intent. I've watched plenty of manosphere content from …

r/Stoicismcomment3/17/2026
Need some hinge/dating app advice

You look like a pleasant, friendly guy - which women honestly value - but at the risk of sounding shallow you need to cut your body fat so your face is less round and more angular. Also if you're loo…

r/AsianMasculinitycomment3/17/2026
Need some hinge/dating app advice

Coming across as a young guy who likes to party isn't the problem. His appearance just lacks any edge, masculinity and dimorphism. In his case thankfully it seems fixable.

r/AsianMasculinitycomment3/17/2026
Why DONT some exes come back? (Not including toxic or abusive relationships)

I’ve actually been wondering the same thing. Every ex I’ve had eventually came back or at least reached out again… except the last one, which was actually the most important relationship I’ve had. Th…

r/BreakUpscomment3/18/2026
LSD & calisthenics

Have you seen the Warlords of Draenor cinematic in World of Warcraft? That’s exactly how I felt for six hours—pushing myself to the edge, carried by sheer will, untouchable by fatigue. Masculinity sur…

r/Psychonautcomment3/18/2026
Are My Expectations Too High?

This is NOT the new normal. ED does occur in this demographic, but a man that is secure, able to care for himself, and takes ownership of his health overall, will take the appropriate steps to get eva…

r/datingoverfortycomment3/18/2026
AM diversify your dating pool

I don't know if AF have helped with the change because up until Kpop/Kdrama changed the definition of masculinity in the West, the dating outside the race stats were not nearly as close as 37% vs 42%.…

r/AsianMasculinitycomment3/18/2026
I have zero self esteem. Like zero.

I hope you know you are not a loser! You sound kind and compassionate. Something that does not blend well with toxic masculinity. You deserve an environment externally and internally that helps you gr…

r/therapycomment3/18/2026
How do I (F26) talk to my partner (M33) about casual misogyny?

I will assume youre asking in good faith, so I will give you an actual reply. Theres a difference between: „male and female people have some differences in their bodies, for example that male bodie…

r/relationship_advicecomment3/19/2026