people,

Yes, growing up my mother had some kind of paranoia. She'd hide things away, like books and clothes, but when she couldn't find them, she would blame our neighbours or people coming into the house and…

How should this sub respond to reddit's api changes, part 2 — We stand with the disabled users of reddit and in our community. Starting July 1, Reddit's API policy blind/visually impaired communities will be more dependent on sighted people for moderation. When …

Struggling to grow a small brand organically—what actually worked for you? — Hey everyone, I’ve been working on growing a small e-commerce brand for the past 8 months—nothing huge, just a niche lifestyle product I really believe in. I’ve been mostly focusing on Instagram and T…

Rating my website + getting help with ad setup — Hello! Ive started a small workshop where i produce and sell lamps. A lot of my designs are based on already existing popular ones but most of them ive come up with myself. I never expected to becom…

I’ve decided to go all in on my mental health tech startup — how do I fully shift from side project mindset to founder mindset? - i will not promote — Hi, I run a platform with digital tools to help people build mental strength and emotional resilience. Until now, I’ve treated it like a serious side project, but starting today, I’m committing to it…

How to build a marketplace from scratch? I will not promote — Hey guys! I hope you are all good. I am currently developing an MVP for a marketplace I talked with some people, and would be willing to participate on. However, although I am making my own research,…

Personalised auto mails for retention — People, have you ever wondered if in Shopify you can set the rough aging/by when the product will potentially end and needs a refill (such as for shampoos, oils) and this will auto trigger mails to us…

Duolingo leader throws shade at r/UXDesign — You all might remember this thread a few months ago, [debating Duolingo renaming UX to “Product Experience.”](https://www.reddit.com/r/UXDesign/comments/1j3hvkw/duolingo_renames_ux/) The VP Mig announ…

Being an Entrepreneur is bloody hard — That's a quote from Dan Pena and it's absolutely right. The bum boys on Instagram, YouTube and all the rest that pretend like it's easy are 1000% full of it. The true life of a business person and e…

I’ve failed at startups, lived on the road, and I still believe I’m successful — I was 19 when I started my first startup. I led a team of 15 people, wanted to change the world. And I failed. At 21, back in 2016, I left home without any money, hoping that traveling would help me …

Scaling a Faceless YouTube Channel into a small business. — Around a Month ago, I started mentoring a few people on how to start a YouTube automation channel/business with no real launch, just looking to help a handful who was serious about building something …

How do you actually feel safe believing and knowing when it comes to an SP manifestation? — Brief context: I've studied the law on and off for 6 years. Tried to manifest 2 old SP's with varying success, then eventually having them both try to contact me, but I realized that I was shooting so…

No one should suffer because we have trauma. — I see a lot of people accept harmful behavior, because their partner has past trauma, but in my opinion, that is wrong. I know I can come off as harsh sometimes, but we have to have honest conversatio…

Does anyone else go through phrases where they feel cynical about people easily? — I kinda feel like I’m in one of those now. I'm a DA. It usually happens if I feel like I’m trying to make plans with people, but they’re not responding or declining. Usually I’m okay with it, but when…

Why hold out hope for other people to meet my needs when it feels more productive and ultimately better to want nothing from other people? — I try my best to be the most attentive friend I can be no matter my internal state. I don't mind doing this for the people I value, and it makes me feel better to be helpful to other people, although …

The most painful relationship and breakup I've ever had, but it cracked me open so that I could heal. I created a text message llm analysis tool that revealed insecure attachment. — EDIT - TLDR; 8-month, high-intensity relationship. I was DA-leaning; she showed a lot of push–pull/negative lensing. We loved each other and still couldn’t repair, so we went NC. Post-breakup I focuse…

Having trouble differentiating between anxious attachment / normal needs, feeling lost and alone — First Reddit post here! (It's a long one, I just really need a place to put it all down and get some support, so thank you). I (19F) got out of my first long term relationship about 3 months ago. It l…

Proving Conciousness Creates Reality Syllogistically — 1. We exist. But our existence is dependent. We as physical beings, did not cause ourselves. 2. Everything we observe in the universe is also dependent. Stars, planets, people, and everything else we …

Any support groups out there for preoccupation with dating? — I think the obsessive thoughts and rumination around dating (status, ongoing situations) is a common thing in anxious attachment so seeking support here. Has anyone found any support groups or what l…

How to soothe myself when they say they aren't upset. — I am very fortunate to have consistent, attentive, loving people in my adulthood. I haven't conquered my unhealthy habits that come from my attachment system, however. My husband is wonderful. He st…

Success Story: FA/Disorganized Attachment Healing Roadmap, Resource Recommendations — **Hello, fellow Fearful Avoidants! The below post has grown out of almost 3 years of research and healing this attachment style, which in my case was coupled with Relationship OCD (ROCD). ROCD is a vi…

Maintaining this piece of positivity — Alright gang, I hope everyone is well. I’m getting a lot better with my attachment. I’m so proud of myself for times recently when I’ve had a thought about wanting to play into games or behave in cert…

What do secure bids for connection and co-regulation look like? — I am a dismissive avoidant trying to get better about reaching out to others for connection, co-regulation, emotional support, etc. I am really struggling to figure out what's normal/healthy/reasonabl…

Attachment in someone with no relationships? — Wondered this for a long time so it's oversharing hours tonight. I basically don't have relationships. I've overly attached with my mom, possibly even enmeshed, but that's it, and there's a lot of du…

feeling numb in dating but longing for intimacy — For the past few years, I've been mostly numb in dating. I don’t really feel anything romantic. I don’t feel sparks. I don’t feel excited about anyone or attached. I don’t miss people when I’m not wit…

Please help my friend and I decide if we're unreasonable. How much time do you spend with your partner or spouse and if you live separately or together. — My best friend and I are pretty similar. I'm single, she's married. I was dating a guy similar to her husband off and on for fourteen years but everything came to a head at the end of 2024 and we went…

I'm so tired of people. — For reference, a couple of years ago, I was in an abusive relationship that kinda changed who I am. I won't go into too much detail, but let's just say that I used to be outgoing and fun, but also I h…

SATURN RETURN & TRANSITING SATURN/NEPTUNE IN ARIES POSTS PROBLEMS — # PROBLEMS WITH SATURN RETURN POSTS We are getting a lot of Saturn Return questions as transiting Saturn enters Aries. First, many of you think your Saturn Return just began today, Feb. 14, 2026 (usi…

I'm not sure about my attachment style but I want to discover it right now 'cause I want to start healing!!!!!! — Sorry for the long text, I want to be thorough. So, I just ended my first ever relationship. I'm 20, I'm a lesbian from a conservative background and had a lot of internalized homophobia and religiou…

Are pre-birthday discards the norm? — I’m trying to understand this through attachment theory because I genuinely don’t know what just happened. We’re both women. I was 23 with a grad degree, she was 38 and just got her culinary degree w…

Took the stock advice and joined social activities to meet people. Here are my results. — I (37M) decided to conduct an experiment and went out to the types of boilerplate events/gatherings/functions people suggest. Book clubs, sports, volunteering, etc. I joined a public book club throug…

My father is sabotaging my career and medical treatments through "smear campaigns" and monitoring. I feel like I'm living in a Truman Show nightmare. — ​I (25F) am an Indian doctor currently preparing for NEET PG, and I am living with a family led by a malignant narcissistic father. My mother and brother are complete enablers. I’m writing this becaus…

Everything we know about shifting is probably false — So much of our communities take the knowledge we spread to be fact, when in reality shifting isn’t a science. At all. This has been said before but I NEED you guys to actually read and internalize thi…

“My father always wanted to be the corpse at every funeral, the bride at every wedding and the baby at every christening.” - Alice Roosevelt Longworth — Written by Alice Roosevelt about her father, Teddy. I feel like this quote perfectly captures the dynamics of having an nParent. Whenever sympathy, positive attention or adoration is being doled out …

Did your Narcissist gift you a " Trash " gift? — My Nmom would gift me the most ugliest things to wear just to make me look bad in front of other people, to the point where I wore something she gave me and I would find out I was being laughed at by …

DA healing update: searching my true self, my inner child finally seen — Some of you may know me at this point. I'm (40M) dismissive avoidant, my wife fearful avoidant (41F), together 17 years, married 13 years, 3 children. I've been working on my attachment style for 5 mo…

What is even going on? — I (45f) have been single and dating for a a little over a year now, and there have been some frustrating patterns emerge that I just can’t make sense of. So I’m curious if anyone else out there has. A…

I have done absolutely horrible things. I might be the worst human being to ever live. — 20M. This might be the longest post you'll ever read. I believe I have OCD and do nothing but ruminate 24/7 about my past. I have been in isolation for the last 3 years. It started as a fear of adult…

Heavy energy/projection in living space — I keep experiencing, on a daily basis, unbearable heavy energy (from the little I've learnt, and I have learnt a lot) it feels like a projection of some kind. I have learnt and grown about myself abo…

My AM is a stupid fucking snitch — Any time I tell my AM anything that I want her to keep between us, she’s always snitched to my AD. But whenever she wants me to keep a secret from my AD, I am somehow expected to follow that same secr…

My mom called my son’s birthday party “f***ing embarrassing” because she cares more about what people think than celebrating him — **UPDATE:** Thank you to everyone who commented and shared advice. A lot of people suggested going no contact with my mom to protect myself and my son. I understand why people said that, but I want …

I think I might have extreme codependency and I don’t know how to break the cycle — I’ve been realizing something about myself that’s honestly kind of scary, and I’m wondering if anyone here has experienced something similar or managed to get out of it. I feel like I’m at a really e…

Marriage - 7th or 8th house? — I read so much about how marriage is linked with the 7th house. But so much of the 8th house relates to marriage. Resources are shared. Bodies are shared. Isn't that what marriage *is?* I have sun, …

Does anyone else find that exposure therapy and putting yourself in social situations literally fries your brain instead of making you stronger? — People often say things like "just work for a month and it'll get easier," "don't give in to your avoidance," "go where it scares you." I really tried to follow this advice, and it didn't get easier.…

Why does my body feel anxious at night even when my day was fine? — I’ve been noticing a pattern with my anxiety that confuses me. During the day I usually function pretty normally. I can work, talk to people, stay busy, and things feel relatively manageable. But on…

unpopular opinion: therapy isn't worth $200/session — Everyone acts like therapy is this magical thing that's worth any price but honestly? $200 for 50 minutes of conversation is f\*cking absurd. I get that therapists have degrees and student loans but s…

OKAY LISTEN Y'ALL. — I don't know which tag this would come under but I just have to say this because the amount of 'im gonna give up' , 'its not working' ' what am I doing wrong' posts am seeing is insaneee. First of all…

I spent 8 years trying to “fix” my mental health and now I think the real problem is that I’ve been obsessively trying to fix myself — Hi everyone, I’m trying to explain something I’ve been struggling with and I’m wondering if anyone else has gone through something similar. For about 8 years, I’ve been deeply focused on “healing” m…

As an East Asian, I feel discriminated by colleagues — I feel I have experienced a lot of discrimination in the workplace due to my race, but I feel like it's also getting worse as the years go by. Actually, so many things, like the propensity for cancel…

Children know when they parents don't love them. Children know when their parents resent and hate them. — It's surprising the amount of parents who not only think that their abuse is justified, but that believe that their children "are too young, so they won't notice" or "they'll forget about it". I heard…

I manifested clear skin! Pictures below. — TW: skin issues, swipe on your own risk. The first 3 pictures are taken today in daylight no filter, the other pictures show my skin before. Months ago I got really bad dermatitis and acne, the skin…

There aren't many but as far as I can tell there are a couple which could qualify. 1. Escapism. Just like anything fun, let alone of the "reality substitute" type, there is the potential to use it e…

Useful categories are: People, Places, Objects, Feelings, Colors. Haven't used it in a while but dream journal apps like [Dreamboard](https://dreamboard.com/) let you input those separately so you ca…

Just a few questions here - I'm new to lucid dreaming. I garden quite a bit, so I can grow Artemisia douglasiana and a few other helpful herbs and make a poultice or something. I usually don't rem…

Stop stalking their socials too. Mute on instagram. It pushes their stories and their posts to the end of your feed so unless you’re following 2 people, you should never see anything from them. Muting…

**!!!!! READ ME !!!!!** The purpose of this community is to explore human energy in all of its facets while stripping away the esoteric language, rituals and distractions that have accumulated over …

Just believing is one thing, subconscious faith towards your desire (not LOB particularly) is another thing. You lived your entire life based of your default beliefs without even knowing the Law. I sa…

And you could have set goals, taken action and had every obstacle thrown your way to stop you even then. This has happened to many people, myself included. Covid is a great example of that unwelcome i…

Agreed. The best and healthiest relationships to pursue as someone recovering from a disorganized attachment style is a slow burn. Recognizing everything you have in yourself is a tremendous accompl…

If you want to talk, I invite DMs but I'm only here sporadically. I'm a healed avoidant. I say that, but it's not black and white. I measure now for mostly secure. I still experience the initial resp…

If people are being ghosted repeatedly by different people, they need to reevaluate their own behavior, and I will die on that hill. And not just “oh I need to stop picking bad partners that ghost me”…

I never said they tried, but who wants to find out that someone else emotional regulation depends on your constant presence. Again I’m talking about anxious attachment because secure people are secu…

I was very much like you, and I had lots of commitment issues. I didn’t want to be anyone’s “girlfriend”, because I felt I would lose freedom, so I would willingly choose unavailable people because I …

Love the question!! You don’t need a relationship to grow, that’s the beauty of it (you can but it will be slower, depending on what kind of partner you end up with) You could try to explore being mo…

My brother i think it's good you posted here bc you can begin to recognize you have anxious attachment. It was one date. Even if she's brushing you off and lost interest, she doesn't necessarily owe …

Exactly. Much like 2 people, they both speak the same language, but have different dialects and use different words. American English vs British English or Spanish vs Mexican Spanish.

The thing is, with certain types of people you cannot afford to feel empathy because it will just be used against you. The same person begging on their knees for you not to leave them can be the same …

How does it feel when visualizing? Was it vivid or just feel like a movie but first person pov? Fir my visualization I tried to feel the physical objects, conversations of people, their normal expre…

As a man who has been on both sides of the coin… bear with me cause this is a long read but it has relevance I promise.  I’ve been the anxious wreck begging and pleading. Saying stuff like “you don’t…

Well, by not dating insecure people, that’s one way to not become unregulated to begin with. Therapy helps too.

You sure they were secure? Back in the day I used to think some of my exes were secure until I realized they triggered my nervous system because they were triggering my trauma, more specifically my em…

No, my statement has nothing to do with validation. I find when someone says 'that's invalidating', they haven't sat down and thought about what they're saying. And why would I need to constantly vali…

By ‘phantom ex,’ I mean that the most recent crush is serving as an idealized image of someone they can never have, which makes it easier to compare others to this unrealistic standard. It’s common in…

I have anxious attachment but I get over people very quickly if I feel their interest wane. I think U could have a bit of romance/fantasy addiction. For people suffering that, they tend to fantasis…

Sorry, the more correct term is fearful avoidant leaning avoidant, and DA and FA are their own categories. However, there are a number of variations among FAs, including whether we lean anxious or avo…

When the price moves from a published and reasonable price to "Contact us" followed by "Let's setup a meeting"... That's when I know it'll be a waste of time... I need to gather all my people, to a …

There is a simple solution to the problem. Get involved with the start up community in your area. Get involved in meet ups. Hang out with other start up founders. Eventually you will meets someone who…

I have a 100% automated account for bluesky and youtube, instagram and tiktok is like 70% automated. instagram I don't automate the actual uploads etc, only content creation, they will limit your acc…

It depends on what kind of AI you're looking to do. Smaller, tactical, modular AI applications are going well. And these All in one solutions are harder to sell. Also, for some people, they're VE…

Thank you for sharing, I didn’t have the feeling he was seeing other people, but I might be completely wrong 😂 anyways as you said, definitely not worth staying in this situation, definitely someone …

That might as well be, I have no idea and probably don’t even wanna know if he been seeing other people 😂 he was free to do that cause being exclusive was anyways never brought up. But regardless of…

I can say absolutely the same about anxious-attached people, but you don’t see me doing that? You ripped my words out of the context. Do I know that I’m avoidant? Yes. I used to be real bad as a teen.…

But isn't it just you bending over backwards while she's exactly where she was? This sounds like a project and you can see positive results so it might feel good. But imagine, there's someone out ther…

My takeaway from this is that you should release this app for the general public. Would be useful for loads of people, not just avoidants. In my own life, I often don’t have enough energy to respond t…

I love this. I’m autistic. I don’t have time to unpack how attachment styles play out for autistic folks but a nutshell version is - prettt much the same , just more extreme and indelible/harder to ch…

All insecurely attached people tend to show up the same early on in relationships. They're usually all persistent at the start, which is a sign of someone that is insecure. Secure people don't priorit…

According to Ken Reid, the playful energy can be a sign of arrested development, which can happen with insecure attachment styles. He mentioned avoidant types can sometimes develop the class clown arc…

I had gotten divorced a year prior to meeting him and that was what really triggered my wanting to change. My ex husband and I are still close friends but I really messed it up by being avoidant. We a…

So maybe the best strategy is to set some rules for dating. Here's some suggestions: Make it clear on the first date that dating for you is an exclusive engagement. While you are dating one person, y…

Everyone always gets hurt... we are human beings. Expecting not to get hurt ever is not going to happen. You can't actually change your behaviour without engaging with other people, and you cannot con…

I don't agree with that no one should suffer. Suffering is, on some level inevitable. It's a signal to address an unmet need. While I agree that we should work on healing and healthy ways to connect w…

Yeah, it's learning to be honest and open up to the therapist and developing a safe, nurturing relationship with them (often the first one we've had) that does the trick. You gotta do that somehow to …

There's no reason anyone needs to know that you see a therapist. If you don't tell people, they won't know right? Depending on your health insurance, a session usually only costs a copy ($20-40) fo…

Mostly because the information isn't necessarily what the person needs or may even be harmful or untrue. From all accounts people say it "tells them exactly what they need" and doesn't challenge them,…

Some thoughts - this is rushed, so not nicely written: \- Anxious-preoccupied: preoccupied with attachment figures and attachment relationships, anxious about possible unavailability of attachment fi…

Thank you for your kind, comprehensive comment. I don't know, I feel I'm in such an odd place. I am legitimately intelligent, extremely emotionally open, & reflective. But, I just cannot get close to…

Aw mate. No, it doesn't seem pathetic at all. Makes sense why it's still in your head after 2 years, then. That sounds really difficult. I feel for you. Your solution is a good one... but can I add…

Everyone, including the anxious people, put their best foot forward at the beginning. Anxious people expect it to always stay the same as it is in the honeymoon and that’s unrealistic for both sides.…

The blame-shifting is too much. You are doing exactly what the other commenter was talking about. Avoidants do this to everyone, not just to anxious people, and it’s in excess of the typical “putting…

I think I’m a DA (one test says DA the other says SA but I don’t feel that). I get like you do too, it takes emotional effort to try to connect with people, and it’s like a minor trauma when it’s not …

you are very heavily generalizing here. how many avoidants have you actually known? they cannot control their triggers, the ones that will try and heal will work on the behaviour around dealing with t…