emotional affair

Alright, I'm not reading the other comments, because they're sure to infuriate me. Let me summarize: a bunch of people are going to ignore the fact that you've been married for 32 years, and tell you…

Is this an emotional affair? — I (36F, single), have a good guy friend (40M) who has been dating a new woman for 2 ish months now. Full disclosure I don’t like her very much and I think they’re moving super fast (already saying I …

DDay - 2/19/2026 - Online Emotional Affair Led to Full Blown Infidelity — I found out my wife was going on “solo” concert trips, but was also using them as a way to vacation with a guy she had been talking to online for years. Seventeen years together and seven years marri…

Stuck In My Head After Affair — So 3 years ago, I found through phone bills that my wife was texting a coworker more than anyone else. I confronted her as she had also been very distant. After trickle truthing she admitted to having…

What s month it's been — The title says it all. Confronted my wife last month on the 7th last month at 1 am and learned that she cheated on me and was talking with someone. This was after an emotional affair that I discovered…

No contact year 6 update: — Hello everyone! I’ve made some update posts in the past and figured I would make one for year 6 as that anniversary is coming up soon, and with context it will make sense why I still specifically reme…

32 years of marriage, but I'm still unsettled by an affair from 2006. Is it too late to ask for the truth? — I’ve been married for 32 years now, but there is a something from 2006 that I’ve never been able to move past. Back then, my daughters were 11 and 10. We were leaving my parents' house after a weekend…

18 months after my husband’s affair and the “ick” just hit. Has anyone ever gotten attraction back after this? — About 18 months ago I discovered my husband had been having an 3 year long emotional affair with a coworker that he admits he was actively pursuing. We decided to try to reconcile. To his credit, he …

Wife Wants Divorce so She Can Be With Affair Partner — Wife insists we divorce after I caught her having an emotional affair with her coworker. Of course she has all sorts of lies and manufactured reasons why we need to divorce and insists it has nothing …

I made my husband confess to OBS and here’s what happened — For your education and entertainment purposes, this is the story of what happened when I forced my husband to confess to OBS. Quick backstory: (you can read the full post on my profile) my husband h…

Those of you who were blindsided, discarded, or abandoned- how are you doing now? — I see a lot of people on here saying that they were unhappy for years and what a relief it is to be divorced now. But what about those of us who thought we were in a happy marriage only to be left wit…

She admits the lies and secrecy, but still denies anything physical — I’m posting because I feel like I’m losing my grip on what is real, and I need perspective from people who understand trickle truth, repeated minimizing, and what it feels like when someone admits jus…

Recovering from emotional affair. — I discovered my wife's inappropriate relationship with her coworker in August of last year. We are finally at a point where I believe nothing physical happened (I truly believe it) and she has admitte…

My husband cheated. I don't want 50/50 custody. I also don't know if I can stay with my husband. I don't know what to do. — Both options suck. I found out my husband cheated on me during my pregnancy with our first child (which we both wanted). It was a physical and emotional affair. It continued after our son was born. It…

I caught my dad cheating, told my mom, and now feel resentment and guilt for their divorce. — My \[F25\] parents have been married for 30 years. My father has engaged in physical infidelity multiple times throughout their marriage and has engaged in several sexting relationships. My parents br…

Was my therapist blaming me for abuse? — My husband and I went to marriage counseling. I had an affair and afterwards he became very controlling and abusive. He had very strict terms for me to follow in order to remain married. He had my loc…

Wife cheated after 7 years of long distance and 3 years of marriage — Met my now wife 10 years ago online. I live in Europe and she is from the US. We talk for a year and things start to get romantic. I visit her for the summer and we decide to start dating and go long …

20 years of a "loving" marriage, then a 6-month double life. Seeking to understand this mindset from folks who have 'lived experience' — I am hoping to seek perspectives from folks with "lived experience" with the most difficult situation I am going through to help me process the cognitive dissonance of the last few days. I have firmed…

My ex turned into a middle aged fuckboy — Recently learned that my (40F) ex boyfriend (42M) of 6 years has been having picking up young (20s maybe early 30s) girls at the bar every weekend and having sex. There may be a more constant girl in…

Should I ask the mistress — My husband and I have been married for 11 years and he had an emotional affair with another woman he met online. The healing process has been strained at best. For months there was resentment and blam…

I think my ex is getting unicorn hunted and I'm stuck dwelling on it. — For background, I am part of a large online friend group, bunch of us have met in person, all relatively close, based around a game. My ex was dating someone else in the friend group, they had a prett…

71 days since DDay - I’m drowning — Just need to tell someone, a stranger, that I’m drowning. Husband and I had a rocky marriage the last year or two. I found out he was having an emotional affair for 4 months with a coworker. He’s…

My best friend turned lover ghosted me last year, but turns out he was cheating — He was my best friend, my rock, my lover, my support system. We had been friends for 7 years. He asked for space last March to deal with some grief, and I obliged, but he told me to wait for him. He t…

21 years and what? — I don’t even know how to make sense of my situation anymore. My husband and I have been together for 21 years. We have 6 kids and built what I thought was a strong, happy marriage. A few months ago,…

Am I actually losing out? — Looking for ways to build my life up (hobbies, activities, places to travel in EU etc). I found out my partner of 6 years was having an (at least) emotional affair with a coworker since January. Best…

At a loss and don’t know what to do — What should healing 8 months after discovery look like? What if they talked to the mistress again in the middle of the healing? We are at our wits end. I know what I need to heal, clearly expressed it…

Husband choosing affair partner, we have two kids - how does anyone survive this???? — Ten months ago I found out that my husband of 13 years was in a long-term, physical and emotional affair with one of my closest friends. I spent the past ten months trying to save my marriage and my f…

I’ve been sleeping on the couch and am lonely — I’m (42m) and my wife (39f) have been married for 18 years. Our marriage has been rough at times mostly because of me. I’ve had a porn issue for most of our marriage but I got help several years ag…

Is it possible to rebuild trust after emotional affair? — On Thanksigivng 2025, I (F/46) found out that my boyfriend (M/46) of 6.5 years was still communicating (texting and occasionally meeting up for bike rides) with a woman he met on an online dating app …

To my Ex Wife, you turned into all the people you mocked! — Its funny when I really think about the person you revealed yourself to truly be. Its odd how you judged my sister, saying she MUST have been talking to her new boyfriend before she broke up with he e…

confused if i [24NB] should break things off with the girl [23F] i'm talking to? — tagged nsfw for mentions of abuse (verbal and physical) long one, just gonna get right into it. i, 24NB (afab), am currently talking to this girl, 23F, who also has/had a fwb. we're both african amer…

My (30M) girlfriend (29F) of 5 years confessed to a "minor drunken mistake" with a coworker. My brother just leaked her group chats, and the truth is making me sick. How do I move forward from this? — **Background:** My girlfriend "Amy" and I have been together for 5 years. Recently, I took a stressful promotion that requires long, unpredictable hours. I did this specifically to improve my financia…

Me 34M not sure I can trust my wife 34F again after secrecy and emotional affair — I’m 34, my wife is 34. We’ve been together 11 years, married for 8, and we have two kids, 5 and 2. About 7 months ago I found out that my wife had been emotionally involved with a man she introduced …

Recently told me she wants to end the marriage. Details inside. Long read. — Over Easter weekend my wife of 20 years told me that she really wanted to stop the marriage because it just wasn’t the type of marriage that she wanted to be in anymore. She stated that we were great …

20 years and it's gone. — I keep trying to tell myself that I'm lucky because we didn't have kids, that we kept finances separate, that I can't keep trying to justify sunk costs, but right now I'm just so much of a wreck that…

My partner says she chooses me but keeps an emotional affair with her coworker — I’m losing myself — Hi everyone, I created a post some time back in different community about my gf having a possible EA with a coworker which turned out to be true. I’m in a situation that is honestly breaking me menta…

Contacting the affair partner? — Interested to know what the general consensus is on contacting the affair partner. My (M,35) wife (F,35) had an emotional affair with a man (M, 50). From what I can gather and have been told it wasn…

Wow, you have done a significant amount of research. I am just now learning about these Avoidant Attachment Styles. I'm not real sure what my SO has, and I'm also not sure which attachment style I hav…

> It also did create a weird cycle of us talking and revisiting old memories a lot and then blaming each other for why things ended. That's why the people you were both dating accused you both of c…

I don't think it's necessarily an emotional affair. But I think you might be impeding their relationship some. Consciously or subconsciously-- I think you have feelings for this guy. How would yo…

Not an emotional affair. But definitely don’t get in between them, or intentionally sabotage the relationship. They need to work through the relationship between themselves, as the relationship is b…

I don't think it's an emotional affair, but it's clear to me you are imposing on their relationship, even unintentionally. Given that you were friends before this relationship started, he needs to de…

It's not an emotional affair, that's just what normal friends do. However, the way you talk about him seems like you have feelings for him and want to have a go at a relationship with him and it's pro…

Not an emotional affair and I think he needs to be the one to set whatever boundaries he thinks are appropriate 

This feels really toxic to me, from all parties. OP, a few things you said raised red flags, namely your criticism of their saying "I love you" 2 months in, which is not that uncommon if two people a…

It's not an emotional affair but I do think it's inappropriate for both you and him to engage in these long phone calls regularly.

Not an emotional affair but your relationship offers connections that may mask what doesn't work with her. Even perfectly paired couples need outside friends and other needs met outside the pairing, …

I don't think its an emotional affair. But I think you want it to be. And I think that's why she doesn't like you. That said, I don't think you're in the wrong either. You're allowed to not like your…

Also key distinguisher: emotional affairs always have a strong level of dishonestly and secrecy.

Not an emotional affair but your friend needs to address this situation with his gf, and you need to talk to your friend about it. If you're good friends, you can talk about the dynamics openly and fi…

Sounds like you desperately want him. I would not be super excited to hang out with you either. Plus you're calling the three year friendship an emotional affair. I have had really xloae male friends.…

Single guy, early 40s , have had both committed and casual encounters ( no , not simultaneously). Tend to be asked these things by friends so chiming in. In respect of the term " emotional affair "…

Not an emotional affair but I can see why she would be jealous. I would consider giving him a little bit of space for his relationship to thrive .

Idk if I’d define it as an emotional affair but it’s definitely something. I don’t think many people would just be completely okay with their SO spending that much time talking to and hanging out with…

It doesn’t sound like an emotional affair, at least on his part, but it’s also probably not appropriate for someone in a relationship

Because it was sexual. Just because they haven't had sex doesn't mean that sex wasn't involved in a different form. Maybe your wife masturbated to pictures and thoughts of him or they had phone sex. W…

**man i felt this reading it. that "stuck in my head" feeling is brutal—especially after 3 years.** the trickle truth early on already broke trust, so now even when she says nothing else happened, ur…

As long as your wife is working with this guy, the affair is still going on. It's also an indication she has no remorse for cheating on you. Emotional affair is cheating. By continuing the affa…

Honestly, an emotional affair is the same, or even worse than a physical affair. She felt disconnected from you, so instead of talking to you about it, she sought the attention of another man. She lie…

Very similar to my situation. My husband had an emotional affair with a workout partner at the gym. When I found out, they were secretly spending time together outside of the gym I made him swear on h…

Being cheated on is soul breaking. Even an emotional affair. Your marriage will never be the same again. The trust has gone. It is very difficult to stay in this kind of relationship. You question e…

Personally, I can believe that they may not have had sex. I wouldn't be super sure that they didn't, but I wouldn't rule out the possibility that they didn't. Between the lack of unexplained absences,…

I struggled immensely after her emotional affair - it took me months to just get to a normal place. That was her second chance. When I found out about this time, I remember asking if we could go to co…

Yeah, throughout our marriage she never really had guy friends, and she didn’t go out with other men. It was just this one guy somewhere in the East Coast who had been texting her online for years. …

It was just an emotional affair. Having said that you should get tested for STD’s and tell her you fully expect her to to test and share her results with you. Her testing makes sure you stay health…

Emotional affair incoming

Yup this mine had 2 emotional affairs and the second one 2 years later left with the affair partner she was hiding the fact she was texting him till 1am and saying they are just friends in a relations…

I just found out that my spouse was having an emotional affair before he asked for divorce. He lied and said there was no one else and that he wanted to "work on himself" before dating again. I told h…

Be very careful here, and don't ignore your instincts. My wife also assured me that the affair was emotional only. Until I found the evidence. Actually, the emotional affair is bad enough - every bi…

I am going through something similar, my husband admitted to an emotional affair after I found things in his phone, 5 months later I found out it was more than that. If they were physically together, …

He's got a girlfriend or fiance overseas and having an emotional affair with you. Exact thing happened to me :(

In a way, yes. I was aware of AP and what they were doing, I just didn’t know to what extent. Before finding the evidence of their emotional affair, I was trying my best to key in on those signs, whic…

Either she needs to quit her job and get a new one or You need to leave the relationship. They still work together, their attachment is still activated and the “forbidden” nature will make it even mo…

You say emotional affair, but to be honest, it was most likely physical as well. It is very rare that simply based on non-physical emotional connection that somebody would be so willing to just blow u…

Of course they had sex. I can't believe people can get the idea that adults can have more than a week long emotional affair if they're physically close. If they met over those years, they had sex. Per…

You need to talk to a few local attorneys and get your options even if you don’t divorce. Also, get a separate, individual back account at a local bank or credit union. Write out a timeline, along w…

Love bombing. They have a new person in their lives and want to make a good impression. They've been out of the dating scene for many, many years and over compensate. Usually there is an emotional af…

So she's been having an emotional affair (at least)... which is just an affair. Lied to you and gaslit you, turned it around to lay blame on you because of alcohol, and now is continuing the affair be…

Ended up having very strong mutual feelings for a newly married women I work with. Nothing physical happened but she clearly had an emotional affair with me. It took a few months but I pushed her away…

Stay sober. Don’t confront her again - not yet. All you will get is more trickle truth, blame shifting, and gas lighting while she hides/deletes all the evidence. Take screen shots of everything a…

I gave my ex wife a 3rd chance after an emotional affair with the same person. A few months into I saw her watching videos about soul mates and she was clearly upset. I sent her a text saying that…

Just how different it gets once you finally give up on "saving the marriage" and are able to see everything without rose tinted glasses and see them for who they really were, and not this idea you had…

I went through almost the exact same thing. We were together 17 years, she was all I ever knew. It started as an emotional affair online, and eventually she flew out to meet the guy and slept with him…

When I found messages confirming the emotional affairs she was having and strongly suggesting physical infidelity as well. Things have been bad for a long time but at that point I realized staying and…

When he wouldn't grow up or even support me as I raised our new born children without him. Saying his feelings towards everything in our life made it difficult for him and he wasn't ready to give up h…

You didn’t deserve to be cheated on, and yes, what she did was an emotional affair at a minimum. She stopped talking to you and let this other guy in. I don’t think you’ll get closure because the da…