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My dad just texted me to "get over it" after 8+ months of silence — I've been low/no contact with my mom since last August after she sent me a guilt-tripping meltdown over something trivial (I didn't text her back fast enough about a card renewal while I was on vacati…
Addressing Community Concerns: No Porn/Masturbation Addiction Posts and Self-Hate Posts + Revamped Subreddit Rules — Hello everyone. Over the past few months, I have noticed a significant number of you expressing dissatisfaction with the increasing frequency of posts related to NSFW/porn/masturbation addiction and …
Looking for marketing internship — Hi everyone! I’m currently exploring remote marketing opportunities and would truly appreciate any leads or referrals. If you know of any openings or teams hiring, please feel free to reach out or tag…
Interview for associate devops role, not sure how it went, need opinions — I had a technical discussion with with a smaller company(around 100-200 employees) and they are filling out a new devops team. I have 7 YOE at large tech companies as a software engineer, but my dutie…
Helpless( I will not promote) — I have been looking for a summer internship in the AI and ML space for two months now. I have one related to web scraping under a professor at an institution, but it will be unpaid. I also have anothe…
Micro investors, where to find them? (i will not promote anything in this post) — I am trying to get an e-commerce store without a bugdet, originally that would be hard, but i thought about getting people together to invest in micro amounts and pay them with a % and 3x there invest…
Can the COO set meetings for the CEO for investors/VC? I will not promote — Curious to know as we’re planning to reach out to investors and get into introductions, would that be ok if I as the COO/Co-Founder cold message investors to meet with our Founder/CEO? Or do I email…
Interview for the same company from 2 recruiters (UK) — Hey, I'm in a bit of an awkward position and could do with some advice. I had a recruiter reach out to me last week about a role that was coming up. I said they could send my CV over. On Friday a di…
My experience winning a chargeback — Sharing my experience winning a chargeback recently. We specialize in gaming collectibles, and our store has been running online for 3ish years. We have had 2 chargebacks in that timeframe, and won bo…
Ready to Boost Your Business? Our Pro Team Can Help! — hope you’re doing great! I wanted to reach out and let you know we’re currently helping businesses like yours grow faster with our proven organic and paid advertising strategies. Whether you’re looki…
Funding Questions (I will not promote) — I started a chatting site in January. And I’m at the stage now where I think I’m ready for funding. I have created a decent pitch deck, one pager, new sign up website, LLC, trademark pending, and th…
Anyone here navigating entrepreneurship with ADHD? How do you manage focus, procrastination, and distractions? — Hey everyone, I wanted to reach out to the community to see how many of you might relate. I've been wondering lately if I might have ADHD — I haven’t been officially diagnosed, but I know a lot of pe…
I'm lucky enough to have turned my podcast into a full time job - here's what I wish I had known — Hey all! Love this community. I'm really blessed to have turned my podcast into a full time job, getting over 200k downloads across 15 episodes upon launch. I'm working on more seasons, but I have had…
Business told me they would ship my package today, should I contact them tonight? — Ok so basically I’m in a bit of a time crunch but I ordered a package based on the stated TAT of the company. The business owner told me she would have the package shipped out by today yesterday and i…
Talk to my CIO or nah? — Context: I’m a junior devops engineer who reports to the Director of my team directly. Director’s boss is the CIO who joined 4 months ago. I want to reach out to the CIO to hear his insights on career…
Organization lost access to website — (Edit: mostly solved. Consensus is there isn't a good process to reclaim a site that has been lost. Open to other thoughts, but thank you to everyone who has offered their advice already!) I've been …
How many brands actually utilize email marketing? — Email marketer here (not for promotion) Often, when I want to reach out to brands, I notice that they have some type of email system set up. It's usually not the best, but it's a "system" nonetheless…
How do you actually feel safe believing and knowing when it comes to an SP manifestation? — Brief context: I've studied the law on and off for 6 years. Tried to manifest 2 old SP's with varying success, then eventually having them both try to contact me, but I realized that I was shooting so…
Does anyone else go through phrases where they feel cynical about people easily? — I kinda feel like I’m in one of those now. I'm a DA. It usually happens if I feel like I’m trying to make plans with people, but they’re not responding or declining. Usually I’m okay with it, but when…
In an avoidant-anxious friendship, how much space should I be giving before I reach out? — The last 2 posts on the sub are about friendship and that encouraged me to post here as well. This is my friend of 5 years. We’ve gone from talking almost everyday to me being given the silent treat…
Struggling with losing my best friend/coworker, anxious attachment + limerence making it unbearable — Hi everyone, I apologize in advance for this long post. I’ll just post the TL;DR at the start. TL;DR: Lost my best friend/coworker of 7 years after a conflict. He’s now cold/avoiding me but friendl…
Hello from your new mod — Hello from your new mod! 🤓 I’m someone who’s been on my healing journey for a long time, and I’ve had gotten so much out of communities on Reddit in my own process. The intention is to keep this s…
Detachment or deactivation? — Me (23M) and my ex (22F) broke up one month ago because she was feeling overwhelmed by some arguments we had due to changes in our lives (new place to live, new work). She's FA. I was secure for almos…
Triggered over broken promises — Got heavily triggered over a little promise made by my boyfriend. I asked him in the morning to send me a message once hes back home but he did not, and instead i find him gaming for hours. I feel …
Losing (F23, AA) my mind in my relationship with my (F22, DA) sister. — We’ve had some real struggles, and I’m at a loss for what to do. I feel generally pretty secure outside of this one relationship, but recently it’s been making my AA flair up in my romantic partnersh…
APs what would you want to hear in response if someone doesn’t feel the same as you? — So I’ve been noticing the way a few friends reach out, feels mismatched with how I’m feeling. Usually this is my more anxiously attached friends/most unhealed ones. Often it will be something sugary…
I’m in the middle of these two (anxious vs secure indicators in early dating) — • I do the fast texting (could be due to my ADD though), but I can give space for days if needed. • I’ve become better at not spiraling. • I can handle changed plans. • I still want to put a label on…
First Time Serious Connection With an Avoidant — I was in a relationship with an avoidant for around 3 months and everything was going well and we weren't moving too fast in my opinion. We had gone on dates and met each other's families. They had be…
Does anyone else have extreme urges to reach out to people from your past and explain past behaviors? — Interested to hear y9ur story.
Today marks 6 months since we last saw and spoke to each other — As the person on the receiving end of testing behaviors, ghosting, and a discard, I would love to hear that my former flame is doing well or even an apology. We have known each other for almost…
Announcement - Important Update on Bot Advertisements — Hello, all! We hope you're having all a lovely start to the new year. Recently, there has been a noticeable increase in subtle ads and a bot campaigns. It is explicitly against our rules to post pr…
FA breakup & prolonged limbo - does avoidance calcify over time or can it still reverse? — I’m hoping to hear from people who’ve been through something similar, FAs, or anyone who has opinions on this. I was in a 2 year relationship with someone I later realized is fearful avoidant (I didn…
Feeling friendless — Hey guys, Sorry long vent, you can skip to the bottom if needed. Recently I have been doing great attachment-wise on the romantic relationships front. But for some reason I feel like I can’t mainta…
Letter to my ex — **7th February 2026** “You will find me, right?” That sentence is the last sentence. The one that always stays with me. Every single day I think about it, and I think that’s why I know what I have t…
Specific Person (SP) Manifestation: No Magic, No Supernatural Forces. Just Proven Science — Hi everyone, It’s been a long time since I last posted, and honestly it was overdue. I keep seeing the same recycled LOA bullshit everywhere. Endless manifestation porn, more unqualified people calli…
32(F) really need advice about feelings for friend — I have developed feelings for a friend (M30) over time. He has given me indications in the past that he might be interested in dating me, but I didn't want to get my hopes up too much. I have been try…
March 2026 Astrology: Transits, Key Dates, and More — **Last month’s write-up, I ended with this,** *“Let’s just say we end the month in a chaotic state of energy. Nothing seems real while at the same time, there is a sense of urgency that something need…
How do I know if I've emotionally checked out or just a protesting behaviour? — I am at a point where I feel withdrawn and not want to talk to a close friend, after repeatedly being let down. "Let down" is probably too harsh. The cultivating event was when I reached out seeking s…
Found out 10 year situation-ship has been married the entire time — I’m absolutely gutted. Sick to my stomach. We’ve (now 28F 35M) been on and off in a passionate, toxic, can’t-keep-our-hands-off-each-other “relationship”, and we couldn’t seem to ever stay away from…
Does the dumper ever reach out? — Almost a year of no contact with my ex, our mutual friends said she has been craving forgiveness from me, but she hasn't reached out. I have a new life so I don't need it, but its really weird for t…
Day 47 of no contact. Here's what nobody tells you about what happens to your brain. — I didn't plan to go no contact. I just got to a point where I realized every time I reached out I felt worse for three days afterward. So I stopped. Day 1–7 was the worst week of my life. Worse than …
I Genially Think My (35F) Husband (36M) is a Psychopath — Hi everyone, please I need help. I’m 35F and my husband is 36M. We’ve been married for 10 years and have two boys (7 and 5). I honestly don’t know what to think anymore. About three months ago my hus…
My (29F) brother (34M) asked me if he ‘still has a sister’ because I’m not excited enough about his baby. How do I fix this? — My (29F) brother (34M) and his girlfriend (31F) are expecting a baby in May. I’m happy for them because I know they really wanted a kid, but I don’t feel particularly excited about becoming an aunt. W…
Break up + no contact update (post 4 months) — I thought I’d give an update into my healing progress since my breakup, in hopes to shed a little light on the small positives that can come from heartbreak. For context, my ex and I broke up in Octob…
My mom called my son’s birthday party “f***ing embarrassing” because she cares more about what people think than celebrating him — **UPDATE:** Thank you to everyone who commented and shared advice. A lot of people suggested going no contact with my mom to protect myself and my son. I understand why people said that, but I want …
Met up with ex after no contact for over 10 months.It went pleasantly. — For anybody wondering whether they should reach out, it went well for me. I was also uncertain how it would go. The relationship ended very badly, we did therapy and it didnt help. I thought id never…
Tips for attracting left-leaning men? — The men who engage with me online the most and who don’t ghost and aren’t flaky end up revealing themselves as conservative eventually. I am ok with someone who’s middle of the road maybe but I’ve com…
Block them. That's all I have to say. — So, in July last year I went through this HORRIBLE heartbreak. And when I say it was a really awful breakup, trust me, it was. Almost four years of a strong relationship ended in a 5-minute call. My e…
I feel it is very hard to make "permanent" progress, like this is a mind virus that keeps coming back — I'm 39M. I met my partner when I was 36. Dated for 2 years, now we have lived together for 1 year. I've made progress over these 3 years but I feel like it's very easy to "reset" and get back down int…
Got an insane flying monkey voicemail this morning — So long story short: My dad is an abusive piece of shit narc in a family of narcs. 7 years ago was the last straw when he beat up my little sister who was 19 at the time. Rather than harm him, I went …
Just deleted her number — She left me for greener pastures in June of '25 and went no contact in July. I miss her dearly. I loved her with my whole soul, but she left regardless. She isn't the villian in my story. I am. I …
In my experience, No Contact is for you first and foremost as a human being to heal and be a better version of you. If (and I mean IF) your ex contacts you, consider it icing on the cake. And hearing …
Thanks, I needed to hear this, I’m so hurt that he doesn’t even reach out. I wish he would Atleast try. I’m trying
Omg that’s horrible. I was ghosted to, that feeling of no clarity hits. You get so desperate that you reach out in so many ways in the beginning just to get an answer onto why?. I was never able to mo…
Easier said than done. I have no motivation to do anything. She was a big motivation for me in life. I’m going on 13 days NC now, and I have a very very strong urge to reach out. She reached out 3 tim…
If you can't count on someone, then a secure person accepts it and moves on. If you're both at fault and want to reconcile, you reach out and have a talk and see if you're both willing to work on thin…
Or don't. If you reach out and they shoot you down, then moving on gets easier. While you're pretending not to care, you're still holding out hope and hope stops you from moving on. Leave it all on t…
I've tried to stay of Social Media as much as possible. Not easy when other friends are trying to reach out to you l, especially for events and birthdays. Checking my birthday messages triggered me, I…
I think its more about your relationship to it, like personally and privately. Before you bring your caregiver into the conversation. If you hurt your child by ignoring their feelings when they were c…
Try to find therapy for yourself and also if you can for your child, try to reach out for support yourself with all this, you don't have to go it alone.
I needed this pinned post today. When I don't reach out, I am kind of ok.. if I cave and she doesn't reply, the pain is absolutely unbearable..
I don’t understand your take on this. No contact has time and time again been proven to be the best thing you can do for mutual healing if the breakup was bad or not mutual. Giving eachother time an…
Yes, I do this myself and see this happen with the guy I'm dating as well. I think it's triggered by positive feelings/increased connection or vulnerability. For me, when we get closer, or when he tel…
I've been in therapy for over a year for various reasons, and for me the first thing I needed to work on was my self image. Understanding and accepting myself, building confidence and a stronger sense…
I understand. Glad you are working through those feelings. I hope I did not come off judgemental. I definitely don't think that your feelings are irrational (I might agree with the inappropriate part …
I know this is difficult to do, but my advice, as an anxious who's moving towards secure, would be to stop texting and calling. It's only been a few days and you know that he was having phone problems…
All the nice words he said are just that: words. And excuses. When two people are away and didn't really have much time to really create a strong bond, anything can happen. First, once you saw he's le…
Hey, Your future employer knows that you are fresh out of university, they know your work experience and should have set their expectations accordingly. Breathe, take your time relax and learn. That…
Let me see if I understand first: So this is a lead-generating platform freelancers can use to find clients (brands) to run ads for? How will the leads be generated? Will this platform run like upwo…
Sophia NLU (natural language understanding) Enging released, with full specs and online demo at: https://cicero.sh/sophia/ For anyone deploying conversational chat bots at all, and is alternativ…
Tell your boss you'd like some face time and ask if they'll help with an intro or if you should reach out to them directly. Then you'll have all bases covered and potentially even get some help
Market research. Study low saturation niches in software. Reach out to decision makers. You can also try r/ForHire. People post jobs there. I would also say most freelancers (those who are starting …
Secure here. I still do learn and learn to accept that a lot of people cant express themself and selfreflect. Long distance friend of mine and, probably DA, got into arguments with me via whatsapp. …
Sounds interesting. How did you reach out to her and offer to use the app?
I'm an FA that leans anxious, and this never bothers me unless I'm in romantic relationships. Platonic relationships with friends that disappear never hits the same for me. Quite honestly, and as som…
The way I identify a DA early on is by watching their actions. Very often they are very very intense at the begining, some even lovebombing, and then all of the sudden they dissappear for a couple of…
Well, if you're into them, that's the first sign. It'll be tricky to differentiate between DA and secure for you because they'll both feel like they're moving at a reasonable pace at first, but a DA i…
Thanks for your answer. I am somwhat between anxious preoccupied and Fearful Avoidant. For example I know I feel insecure when some friends I cherish wont answer at my text for long time, I will feel …
When I learned about attachment theory I thought I was AA bc of my relationships with/attraction to DA partners. That was before I recognized my avoidant traits (being single for years between relatio…
I relate mostly to being anxiously attached or AP and tend usually to score most in that category. But I really relate to everything you described still despite not being DA so perhaps it’s a sign of …
Every post in this sub lately has been so aligned with what I struggle with! I'm FA inching toward secure, and I relate to this a lot. There are phases where I feel more resilient, but if one person c…
Agree! But what I’m not proud of is holding him to that standard, while also admitting that I failed to communicate as well. You’re absolutely right, I have no idea what prompted him to just cease c…
I mean, I will only romanticize this if I didn’t know any better, but if I already did a research and I already experience how it feels like then I don’t give a flying fuck if they reach out I don’t c…
Seems like a person who got spooked and having escaped unscathed has calmed down, reflected, and realized that perhaps their anxiety was irrational. And that is a good indicator that when times get to…
As others have mentioned this is called, "Hoovering". In attachment theory, particularly with someone who is dismissive avoidant, they may feel threatened by too much intimacy and push you away (brea…
Bro there’s a pattern with people of this type of attachment style and like I can’t believe I fell for it every time in the past! - you reach out & they ghost you - they ghost each of your messages …
Basically, what’s happening here, is their feelings of being seen are most likely depleted, at least between you two and he’s feeling that and his brain is scanning who to reach out for and it’s a sub…
If you're completely over him, don't respond. But they might reach out again in like, a month. Lord knows I did lol.
Not at all. He was interested until he saw her with someone else .. he made assumptions then made a self sabotage attempt or a reach out for clarity over jealousy. At this point, his anxiety is showin…
The first example is so hard. I feel like there’s no kind way to be like “I’m not interested in that [getting together]”. I don’t usually ignore people if they reach out, but I’ve definitely forgettin…
Im an FA but with friends mostly DA. I think that she reached out when you were sick was a good sign and offered momentum that you didn’t recognise, you talked 10 days ago or so, maybe it feels like a…
I see you're posting again. No blame here- I am commending you for posting here instead of reaching out to your friend. Give her space. She is clearly nonverbally communicating that she needs it. T…
Like I said in my reply to the above comment, I realized I blurred the lines between friendship and coworker. I’ve said this as well when I apologized to her. I’m not saying this as an excuse but she …
She is like a sister to me and just there in my life. While we’ve had plenty of petty fights, we were able to resolve it. This is our first major fight so yeah it’s been a really bad trigger for me. …
I’m just lost at what to do because she hasn’t really said anything and her actions and words don’t match. She said she wanted to talk as well but that doesn’t seem to be the case anymore. So at bes…
Yes. I’m disorganized attachment, and I think I’m broken. I show affection one second. But then I get scared because I think I’m being too clingy. Sometimes I read posts here about how others have f…
Thank you for sharing this. I'm happy you're learning and improving. I messed up and have too much space. Because he was used to me being the one to reach out and instigate and start the conversation…
I'm sorry to hear your experience, but I'm glad you learned and could heal. I guess ultimately I believe we had to go through it for a reason. We had "unfinished buisness" with that person and we need…
Oh wow, that's a noticeable difference in both the shorter time to deactivation and the longer deactivation period. I would say that I definitely noticed a shorter time to deactivation and shorter o…
Thanks appreciate that. There is no reason for her to have trust issues if anything she’d probably be asking herself why does this guy still like me. Never a bad word between us. She just disapears,…
That is interesting. I would say he is also leaning avoidant, but during the relationship, maybe because I lean anxious. Once we broke up it seemed his anxious side took over and he missed me. Do you …