bad guy

I'd read the link below when you have 2 minutes. It's never too late, your kids will be okay... they wouldn't want their father to lose their soul... nor would you ever tell your children to stay un…

Will my ex FA ever stop resenting me? — I was with my ex (FA) for 2 years, amazing connection and relationship. She broke up after a rough period (lots of changes + frequent arguments, not too intense) saying she was overwhelmed. Later she …

How am I supposed to deal with the "ick" without leading a person on? — I don't get emotionally attached easily, so the early stage of dating is often a long game for me where the other person is trying their best to win me over, and I'm trying to be a good sport and go t…

Supporting an artist — Hello everyone, I appreciate in advance anyone who takes the time to read and respond. I think in general it will be good for me to get this all out there. My (31m) husband (32m) and I have been mar…

Divorce really messes with your head. — You spend years thinking you know someone, building a life, raising a kid together, and then one day they blindside you. What’s even crazier is when they act like you weren’t blindsided. I’ve literall…

Letting go is liberating — Letting go is liberating. I’ve learned that if you don’t break the cycle with a narcissist, they will always find a way to pull you back in. Each time you think it will be different, but it only gets …

I (34m) have been with my partner (34f) for 8 years. I have supported us financially for 8 years but want her to contribute and I'm made to feel like the bad guy — She had just quit her job when we met and dated for a few months before she moved in and I agreed to support us until she was able to find work. She has had a part time job here and there over the yea…

the narcissist catchphrase bingo list — edit 1: jesus christ my initial 32 I wrote already look like they arent a lot lmao (the comments in total added 45 UNIQUE PHRASES HOLY JESUS) , okay heres the updated list (most of the updates will be…

I need people to let me know if I should seek professional help — Hi, for my own privacy let me tell you that I am not an adult but I am not a child either. I have a small fear that I might have a psychotic disorder or I might do something bad later in life. In shor…

Girlfriend asked for a 3 week breakup after a fight. I ended it when she asked for more time — I'm 43M, gf is 37F. I'm a doctor, she's a lawyer. I make good money, she's kind of just starting her career. I never skimp out on her... Fancy dinners, nice gifts etc etc. I was planning to give her a…

My 18M bf broke up with me 17F because he got an A in maths — hi, im 17F and I'm dating 18M, we met in grade school and became high school sweethearts. It's been 4 years and we have been going on really strong, although he lives 30 mins away and goes to a differ…

I’m obsessed with people who definitely don’t care about me. — I miss my best friends so bad it hurts me. I really shouldn’t bc we weren’t good for each other. They definitely see me as the bad guy and seem to not want anything to do with me. (Obviously I have a …

I’m so tired of feeling guilty — I’m tired of being the villain all the time. How is it they can belittle me, speak to and treat me like crap, make fun of my interests and then tell me I’m too sensitive, yet when I give them any of i…

I (19M) need some advice — I have been struggling with certain things in my life As a background check , I was a studious guy , who had a crush on that one girl since grade 1 to grade 12 , then we just lost contact I have pr…

What's something your parents did to you that YOU had to apologize to them for that still makes you angry? — As in, situations where despite you being the victim, you were forced to be the one apologizing. I know mine too well, unfortunately. I've told this in comments before, but now I'll tell it here. So…

She wants the divorce but won't file. I feel stuck. — I've known for months that my marriage is over. We don't fight much anymore, mostly just silence and separate rooms. She told me directly she wants a divorce, said she's done, but that was three month…

Please give me a piece of advice — they’re making me think I’m crazy — Hi everyone, I’m (29M) reaching out because I feel completely stuck in a pretty toxic family situation and could really use some perspective. I grew up in a very traditional household where "respect …

My ex is getting remarried tomorrow — My ex is getting remarried tomorrow. Today he sent me a text “I’ll never understand your choices” and “I would have always fought for my family”. He says this because I’m the one who initiated the d…

Husband choosing affair partner, we have two kids - how does anyone survive this???? — Ten months ago I found out that my husband of 13 years was in a long-term, physical and emotional affair with one of my closest friends. I spent the past ten months trying to save my marriage and my f…

I (49F)finally asked me spouse (50M) for a separation (after 20 years)and I am reeling a bit — My husband (50yo) has been an emotionally abusive and difficult partner for a very long time. I’ve (49F) been with him for over 20 years and have spent most of it trying to make it work with him but h…

[29F] My boyfriend [29M] expects me to move across the world for him, but treats our relationship like a "performance review" and says telling my parents about us is a burden. — I \[29F\] have been with my boyfriend \[29M\] for a little over a year in total, but our history is a bit complicated. We met in September 2024, but broke up in April 2025 because he felt "uncertain" …

Don’t love husband and never have — using a burner for obvious reasons. I (F40) thought I would grow to love my husband (M37). I married him bc he was kind and had the means with which to take care of me and give me a secure life. I sti…

I can’t stop thinking about my ex even though he hurt me badly. How do I actually cope? — I honestly feel like I’m losing my mind and I don’t know how to cope with this breakup. He technically broke up with me in December, but it was over the phone right after I had gone to visit him for …

Currently spiralling — Is this reason enough to leave my husband? I have been thinking about this since summer, this conversation has come up 3 times and he is in agreement so I’m pretty sure I am making the right choice …

How to deal with money questions? — My mom has stolen money from me all my life, even when I was poor. I grew up and moved out a few years ago, so she hasn’t be able to steal from me. However, when she sees me she’ll ask how much I make…

Is it stupid to leave an abusive household when you don’t have the means? — ***TW: EMOTIONAL AND PHYSICAL ABUSE BY PARENT*** Hi. For context I'm an 18yo male living w/ his parents. To put it bluntly, my mother is an abusive alcoholic and my dad is an enabler. She hits him, y…

My mother wants me to leave home because she can no longer control me, and I am going to accept her request. — My mother has a psychiatric illness, which has recently been accompanied by fluctuations in blood pressure. I've felt bad for being upset with her because she's sick, but I feel like our situation is …

The older I get. The more furious I am. The grieving process can be one hell of a rollercoaster sometimes. — I just had my birthday a few days ago. Here I am 26 years old and the older I get, I just don’t understand how someone can be this way. I’ve been NC for 2 years next month so I’m pretty chill, mostl…

She has never stood up for me and it finally broke me — At 35 I feel completely broken. It was a long time coming and it probably seems dumb to most but I’ve been suffering since she pulled this on me. When I text her about it she ignores me or tells me sh…

She has never stood up for me and it finally broke me — At 35 I feel completely broken. It was a long time coming and it probably seems dumb to most but I’ve been suffering since she pulled this on me. When I text her about it she ignores me or tells me sh…

Me (34f) and my partner (40m) have decided to elope with just 2 witnesses. Now BF’s witness wants to add more. Help? — Throwaway account as my fiancé is on reddit TLDR: BF’s mom wants to add more people to our ceremony and how can we hold that boundary? Me and partner have been together for 10 years and always li…

Ex Reaches out after 4 months of No contact — Hi all- Was looking for some opinions on a text I received today from my ex (the dumper). She had broken up with me in December and although we amicably parted ways, it hurt me badly. In those 4 month…

My younger sister keeps trying to involve herself in every hangout I have with my friends (all 15f) — **TL;DR: Feels like younger sister is replacing me in my own friend group.** It’s my first time on here, so I really don’t know what to do. Sorry for any mistakes I make! Sorry if anything is inaccur…

How to get over resentment “27f” “30m” — How do you get over resentment? “27f” “30m” Posting on a throwaway because I don’t want this getting back. Anyway, I’ve been with my fiancé for 5 years. Our biggest issue has always been communicati…

I'm the bad guy! And I admit it! But I'm growing. — TL;DR I did dumb shit but I've learned & grown & I want some insight from guys who've accepted accountability & made the best from the worst. So I'm gonna get this started with some backstory. STBXW …

Dumpers please enlighten me — I’m gonna make this as short as possible. Context: I (34F) got dumped 2 months ago (him 33M). We were together for 5 years and lived for 2. Without going into details his reasons were ‘incompatibi…

Broke up with my girlfriend of 8 years and I feel like the bad guy — I was with my girlfriend for 8 years, since high school. I loved her deeply. I’ll never forget how she saw the world — the way she expressed herself, her hobbies, her goofiness. We went through a lot …

My (21F) partner (22F) won’t communicate issues unless I bring it up first — We’ve been together a little over a year and I’ve noticed that whenever something is going on with my girlfriend (22F) that impacts our relationship, they won’t talk to me about it or do anything unle…

Do I tell my partner I’m smoking? — My partner (25M) and I (25F)got together 11 years ago and both smoked heavily at the time, 4 years ago he got told he had problems with his heart and if he kept smoking he would die before surgery so …

Playing the victim — There is just no winning when they always play the victim card. The worst part about it is when others believe it. It reminds me of this incident in my childhood. I was 7 years old and was getting b…

How to break things off with a significant other? ‘F 21’ and ‘F 23’ — (Fake name Lana) This all started about 11 weeks ago, so a little less than 3 months ago. It started wonderfully, both of us getting and giving flowers, going out on little dates, not caring whether t…

In a tricky spot with my girlfriend(20F), debating about separating but cant hold myself(20M) to do it — Hello everyone My girlfriend and I have been together for about 2 years. We met in high school and are now in a long-distance relationship while we both attend college. I want to preface this by …

I’m an international student (F1 visa) and I can’t tell if my boyfriend actually likes me or just settled for me — Hi everyone, I’d really appreciate some outside perspectives. I’m an international student in the U.S. on an F1 visa. I’m originally from China, but I lived in Japan for many years before coming here…

Am I asking for too much, or am I just tired of carrying my relationship? — Am I asking for too much in my relationship, or is it time to leave? I (20F) have been with my boyfriend (24M) for about 2 years, and I feel like I need outside perspective because I’m too deep in th…

Need to get this off my chest — I’m a 23-year-old woman living with my family(my parents and my 29-year-old brother). Things at home have always been tense, but lately it’s become unbearable. I’ve always felt like the “last kid” to …

Do you give them a reason? — I (52F) have been seeing someone (44M) for a couple of months now. We've been out 5-6x. I'm finding that our communication styles just aren’t meshing. When we’re together, things are great. I enjoy sp…

I’m the bad guy — I’m married. 15 years with 2 kids. I keep messing up. I’ve been in therapy for 2 years now for childhood trauma. I have issues being honest and confronting confrontation. My wife just found out we a…

So my sister assaulted me and I’m the bad guy — Physical assault by my sister My sister is in a field that’s kind of small but very respected and she just graduated and is teaching her peers now her craft. When my family came down for her graduati…

It's nmom's birthday — Tl;dr., My siblings broke no contact with my mom today because it's her birthday. I've always had issues with the way my mom treated me. It's pretty much a textbook covert narcissist/scapegoat relati…

What I learned from breakup and guys(80% of them) I may be wrong .. but this is what I learned… — Well my advice is don’t sleep with man… do everything except sleeping with him… he will always come to ur place… always give special treatment. Well I was in a relationship for 4 yrs and I was his cru…

Broke NC. Got ignored. — I broke no contact because of her indirect signals towards me (or so I thought). I sent her a normal check in to open the convo, and I would've based it on a discussion or just a talk to go through wh…

AGREED!!!! Let’s stay in the grey and remember that we’re all just often doing our best and there are not usually “good” or “bad guys”, except where abuse or violence is concerned. Mostly, we’re figur…

Hi! So one thing I can tell you from lots of therapy and recently spending time around her is I realized I had been only remembering her good qualities and putting her on a pedestal in my mind. When w…

So I just wrote a comment today on another post that might help too: You’re being too hard on yourself. Your divorce is completely fresh and you need to give yourself grace and allow yourself to feel…

There is no hard yes and hard no. You can't trust strangers on the internet for good advice or conversely to be wrong. If you're reading comments or posts and wondering if a person is also here and wr…

This is not standard. Maybe the person has other stuff going on making them act hateful. Or that’s how they cope with their decision to leave. An avoidant deep in the trenches does not want to look li…

I just am not going to hear how awful DA and FA are at this point. I’m a DA I don’t ignore the expressed needs from my partners but I also don’t allow (AA attachment people specifically) full range to…

Im the same way but im a bad guy to give advice on managing it lol

I'm a FA in therapy (although with another FA/DA was leaning anxious). A lot of people don't have the skills and guts to communicate uncomfortable things. Here comes ghosting, which is way easier to d…

From an outside perspective he sounds like he's being honest. You would like to be considered and have consistency ( very normal healthy things) and he can't or doesn't want to meet your needs. The w…

I think I'm dealing with the redirected anger atm. Recently reconnected with someone that asked to be left alone, took three months because there was no set time and I'm autistic so anything that wa…

Im sorry you were in a situation like this, it sounds very painful. Leaving her attachment aside, Im also a FA and, I think going on a date with a new dude next day after breaking up with you can’t be…

Just because you are bad-guy, doesn’t mean ur a Bad Guy?

You worry too much about being the bad guy I think. I say, go at your own pace. If an argument strikes, you can explain yourself. If they don't understand, don't worry about it

Oh man I have felt this exact same way. The thing that helped me the most in the early dating stages was to be clear about my wants/boundaries and consciously keep myself out of the loop of imagining …

My nervous system is stretched taut and I can’t sleep. I was trembling at dinner. I made him smile once or twice. I don’t regret what we shared today, and I don’t think either of us is “the bad guy”…

I’ve been taking space from my friend over the past week, as I was feeling enmeshed and suffocated. I communicated my boundaries before doing so, and since I’ve taken space I’ve felt like I can connec…

Yes. The term Lovebombing is being thrown around a lot and often used incorrectly online. The real definition is when someone does it with malicious intent as a manipulation tactic. I also think anxio…

After 14 months, I return to this subreddit, single again. I had called him around 7 from the grocery store wanting to know what type of beer I should get for the superbowl party we were going to the …

I would also not appreciate knowing I was being phased out instead of broken up with at the time my partner decided they didn't want to keep dating. Protecting my feelings would sound like a BS excus…

It's a lie by omission. He knew how he felt and neglected to bring it up, preferring to let her say it first so he didn't have to feel bad/"be the bad guy." I think it's fine for OP to make that con…

You are giving him way too much credit if you think he cared about being the bad guy. He treated her as less than and would have continued to if OP had not called him out. There was no game - he didn’…

You are giving him way too much credit if you think he cared about being the bad guy. He treated her as less than and would have continued to if OP had not called him out. There was no game - he didn’…

Ugh, girl - he’s stringing you along. I’m sorry. This one is gonna hurt, but you’ll get through it. He’s not stupid, he knows that you love him. he knows that he’s withholding the level of intimacy yo…

Im not. I just sent him a text saying this: “I’m not really feeling like an in-person chat would be appropriate any longer I’m not interested in a partner that completely distances themselves afte…

Phew, I thought you were serious about keeping plans in May, lol. > I’m thinking he probably just wanted me to end it and didn’t want to be the bad guy. Idk. Super annoying when that happens but th…

Agreed. OP based on some of your other comments as well, it seems like you’re fixated on a really high standard of physical attractiveness. Obviously nobody should date people they don’t find attracti…

You are being unreasonable. They are grieving. You need to let this go or you will end up being the “bad guy.”

I am just really tired. My love or friendship will never be enough for anyone even though I try my best. Why am I never enough for people? I wish I could be enough but nobody ever understands how hard…

Finally unfollowed/removed my ex from all my social media (6 weeks post-breakup). The first one, Instagram, was hard. There were over two years of shared memories and I had to work up to it mentally. …

She's stringing you along. She wants to break-up with you. But she doesn't have the courage to do it and doesn't want to be seen as "the bad guy". So she's "quiet quitting" you until you get frustrate…

Don’t let her mess with your head, bc that’s what she’s doing. She wants to break up, doesn’t have the spine to do it, so she’s pushing you away and looking to blame it on you…so she doesn’t have to …

Some people just don’t want to be the one who broke up. They don’t want to be the bad guy. The do crap until the other person had had enough and breaks up It’s over. She wants you to break up

>She told me she is simply "exploring herself" while in college I'm sorry to have to tell you that it's over. Your GF should have the decency to tell you but she won't. She is hoping you will be the …

OP, if you do decide to leave, make damn sure that you have proof of the infidelity. I can guarantee that you will be made out to be the bad guy, that broke up the family. Especially after 3 years. No…

I like to drink too, but a whole handle of rum regularly is a lot. Also, kids changes the equation drastically. Plus, he knows his partner doesn’t like it and consistently leaves her with all the chil…

Hey u/Temporary-Shock-5339 People are coming at you on the basis of arguing the merits of your post. I also posted a comment arguing against your post. Based on comments you have made, you were **th…

This subreddit is supposed to be for all attachment styles, but there are so many posts and comments that put down dismissive avoidants and frame them as the bad guy. It's so stupid. Every attachment …

Exactly and not wanting to appear confront them because they don’t want to appear as the bad guy in the relationship? C’mon now it’s so obvious

I’ve read it’s because they have to make you seem like the bad guy so they can live with what they did. It’s so daunting thinking about having to deal with them for that long 

That’s what I think too. I think it’s one of two situations- he’s got a girlfriend and she’s using his phone when he leaves the room to write these messages and then deletes them on his end. Hence the…

The only other option that it’s not him is that if he has a girlfriend and she’s using his phone when he leaves the room to go to the bathroom or whatever. She makes these text messages and then delet…

That’s exactly what I said in my comment. The only way it could be him not knowing is if his girlfriend is using his phone when he leaves the room to go to the bathroom or whatever. Because I’d be cur…

I can, but then I turned into the bad guy when she can’t communicate with her friends.

Dude hate to say the obvious but do you really think they didn’t hook up when she met him. She played you like a fool. Have some self respect and dump her cheating ass. She’s obviously in love with th…

“Whenever you think about me remember the good times and I’m not a bad guy”

The husband totally knew his girlfriend was sending those messages to his wife. And even if the messages are sent from his old phone, they will still appear on his new phone because it’s the same What…

Uhhh.... Byung Hung Lee??? He played STORM F#@$ing SHADOW (a bad-@$$ name to start off w/) and a T-1000 in Terminator: Genisys. It escapes me more Badass western roles he played....but he plays al…

Most cheaters can’t tolerate being the villain in their own story, so they assign the betrayed spouse the role of the bad guy and use it to justify treating you like shit. Look for this to continue wh…

Yes, I read the post. And it's not always as black and white as people portray. We also only have your side of the story and have no idea what she's thinking or feeling. I am not trying to paint you a…

She will only minimize, trickle truth, blame you, tell you that it meant nothing, make empty promises, and blah blah blah etc...don't look it as wasted the last 10 year. Look at it like a gift you don…