it is what it is

Anxiety tips you might not have heard of — Hello, I've had crippling anxiety on and off for many years and I have developed coping tools that has helped me alot. This Mostly is for people who have GAD and panic disorders but can help for almo…

The song “I love you, I’m sorry” by Gracie Abrams makes me think of the POV of a DA — I'm DA, and I just listened to this song. It feels like a DA talking about how they sabotaged a good relationship, and they regret it. This line particularly hits: "I like to slam doors closed, trust…

6 months. — It’s been 6 months since the discard and me initiating no contact. I’m doing so much better now, a lot happier, progressing in my life with goals I’ve wanted to achieve and I’m no longer heartbroken. …

Boyfriend of 7 months broke up with me, and i begged him to stay. — I got broken up by my boyfriend yesterday, and to me, it was out of nowhere because he said he would never leave me. For context- I was his first serious relationship and he says I was the first girl …

One Sentence Encheiridion (1-15) — I was rereading the Enchieridion and decided to try and summarize each passage in a single sentence. This was a fun activity, let me know if I should share more. 1. The only thing fully up to you are…

I (42F) want to leave my disabled husband (45M). But; don’t know how. — I have been married for almost 20 years. We have 2 kids (8&10). Husband had surgery on his foot about 2 years ago. And, instead of fixing it, they messed it up more. He says he is always in pain and …

Beginning to practice, hoping to find peace and awareness or something — I have depression, a sleep disorder, likely adhd, perfectionism, I’m exhausted and overwhelmed and postpartum, either working 12 hour shifts or with my 2 kids. It is what it is. The many competing pri…

I hate that they deliberately try to ragebait you — Like what is it with APs and wanting to deliberately ragebait you for no fucking reason? Like I just ate lunch and I just asked my AD if he had any news. Now for context, my AD, for whatever reason su…

Me (34f) and my partner (40m) have decided to elope with just 2 witnesses. Now BF’s witness wants to add more. Help? — Throwaway account as my fiancé is on reddit TLDR: BF’s mom wants to add more people to our ceremony and how can we hold that boundary? Me and partner have been together for 10 years and always li…

I need to confront my ex new bf — Me M22 and my ex F20 broke up we were together for 3 years before she had checked out of our relationship, not even 2 weeks later i find out she’s talking to another guy not some random but the guy sh…

Emotionally cheated on, need advice — Ngl, im not old but when you thought you had it figured out, it kinda stings. So the rough situation is that I’m a freshman in college and she’s a sophomore. Same school,same hometown. We’ve been in a…

emotional needles — Every time I needed comfort, my father just says, “It is what it is.” But what about my feelings? I feel down — I need attention and some words of care, not an “I don’t care” shrug. I’m 27 now, and i…

Adult Life staying with Mom — Hello, Life lately, has been a kind of resistance between me and mom. She feels I am like my father in everything, which I am not gonna complain. It is what it is. Sometimes When I talk with friends …

help with my gf — Alright so I M (29) have been dating F(32) for approximately 8 months. I went through a terrible divorce about a little more than a year ago. I was married for 7 years and she cheated. it is what it i…

Raised in a school of Nazis, AMA! — Sadly I was raised in such a shitty environment but it is what it is. Maybe that will be interesting enough somebody has questions about it? Idk just felt i had to post this somewhere

Regret from leading my younger life based on nparents distorted world view — Like some stories I’ve seen here, my parents weren’t 100% monsters. It’s not hard to recall good things they did, but they are massively overshadow by the horrible narc things. I knew something wasn’…

Social exclusion by the girls, during adolescence: I can't let it go... — I apologize in advance and I hope women in this sub, who are suffering, don't feel called out, even though it might seem that way. I've been a little bit over this in a previous post, but it's the iss…

It is what it is. — Breakups suck!! I'm currently going through one but at the end I know everything will be okay. If anyone else is going through something similar just know that you're not alone, some may have it worse…

Boyfriend of one year looks COMPLETELY different from when we started dating and it’s affecting my attraction [26F, 27M] — I feel like such an asshole writing this, but here we go. My boyfriend and I have been together for just over a year. I thought he was insanely hot when we got together. Around eight months ago, he …

I broke up but she didn't want to get back. It's my fault but she wasn't a Saint either. Immaturity on both ends. I have paid for my mistakes in heartache and tears. I hope you get the person who ch…

I had the exact same thing happen to me last year. For third round had to containerize an app and then write some pipelines for it as well as some k8s manifests I think. I presented everything (and th…

Just want to add that the ONLY thing that will work with a person with these types of issues is constant accountability from within and without, not coddling or enabling. That’s bad even for the pers…

I‘m going to make this short: You did nothing wrong. In fact, you did everything right, his behavior is objectively not okay and it’s neither your fault nor your responsibility. I don’t think that any…

5 months post discard. Nervous system is healing. Missing them / crying etc often, but it is what it is. This too shall pass.

Babe I’m a healing anxious and it sounds like your being triggered into overthinking I had to realize that a slow burn is a part of your healing..don’t worry too much about the future I know that’s ha…

Sending some telepathic hugs your way! That's a tough place to be. I've been learning being comfortable and understanding that I'll survive the discomfort are two independent concepts. That's helped m…

Going through major life events alone kinda sucks. But it is what it is and I have no choice but to move forward. It just makes me stronger at the end of the day. I’m tired though.

Lol, I try to be thoughtful, engaging and open minded. I do have my life together pretty well. Wouldn't consider myself a catch. Just a solid decent average dude unfortunately I just haven't been o…

Was meant to go on a first date from Hinge today. Last minute she messaged to say she didn't want to go out because it was raining. Feels like a flimsy excuse to me. I was all ready to go out anyway s…

I would like to note that I do understand what you are saying and get how Society plays a role. I think if anything, what I take issue with is its a little too black and white. That Instagram post is …

Thank you :) Yea I'm sure I'll get used to it eventually. As for the health issues, some of it was sorta the consequences of my own actions, but it's all mostly behind me at this point. It is what it …

I’ll be in these threads a lot given my current life. He left me after 3.5 years. It’s been a few days since the breakup and I hit one of our shared goals that was going to help us work on starting …

I don't think there is a clock, and if there is, I haven't been paying attention to it. But you need to be honest with the guy about where you're at with your feelings. He's probably smitten wi…

I didn't, but we both have kids and our schedules happened to be opposite of each other for a couple weeks. We had said we would text to talk about when something could happen. I have never had some…

People constantly break up over superficial reasons. I think if I was her, I would have said something, because…it is what it is. I honestly don’t know what is appropriate. Would it be like going out…

>Cannot fathom why she will not acknowledge her role in any of this from 2024-now and act like I’m the only one who felt anything That would be an acknowledgement of responsibility and she doesn't s…

I'm apparently being ghosted for the, I don't know, fourth or fifth time in a year. Most of them were pretty casual things and I'm pretty sure they all just found someone they wanted more than me. I…

It is what it is. If you are 100% you want children, this is a very valid reason to sever ties. You’re gonna need to have a sober and direct conversation about this.

maybe he has a reason but doesn't want to hurt your feelings, maybe he isn't sure why he doesn't have the same level of feelings he had for other people. it doesn't really matter. i've had the most am…

> My point is tons of people out there both men and women seemingly have so many people finding them attractive How does it benefit you to dwell on this, though? This is like if I spent all my time c…

Not a downer.. it is what it is. As above, so below is all.

The same way that black men aren't your type, a lot of men don't consider us black women their type. It is what it is, and since you aren't really attracted to black men, you're going to have a narrow…

Girl, don't feel any shame about this and don't apologize for it. imo men (especially black men) do this all the time, so I don't see why only women need to be shamed for it for having racial / aesthe…

I think it is what it is. Women get lots of matches, and expect guys to lead the texting and asking for dates.  I will message in the apps once or twice a day. In each conversation, ask a question o…

The original concept for Bumble was to empower women to make the first move with men they were interested in dating, and most (at least in my experience) took this opportunity to text “hiiiiiii :)” as…

I've gotten that a lot. The vast majority of women who I ask out will accept, but it rarely leads to a second date. Some women will get the "ick" just due to you being neurodivergent and not behaving …

Divorced almost 18 months with a 3 year old. I text my ex-wife (also a cheater) pretty much every day. Some days more, some days less. We send each other pics of our daughter and updates if something …

100% she’s been emotionally checking out for months. It is what it is now, I appreciate the reply

I don’t have a social life anymore. I isolated myself from my friends because they are not good people. And I’m too exhausted on the weekends to make new friends or spent money going to events alone. …

I’m assuming you’re a woman. Finding dates as a man isn’t easy, even for the most attractive men. They’re like job interviews. It is what it is though. I guess we could have more dates if we lowered o…

Thank you. I feel the same way, I don’t wish him ill will. I do wish he had some friends and people always ask me how he’s doing, he just won’t respond to their texts. It is what it is and it’s his li…

Only pissy thing about it is realizing they pretty much don't give a fuck about you while you have to do all this work to get them to arrive in your experience. It is what it is.

Its definitely status, especially in China. I guess they love BMW 5 series too. It is what it is.. I was more surprised that her dad "scouted" me because I picked her up and we drove like 20 min to th…

guys!! HELP! should i break my 1 month no contact with my situationship too?? i mean- i miss him so bad. we don't even know why we stopped talking, but yes we did and... :) i can't think straigh…

That was something I endured too brother. I found out that she was on dating apps. I ended the relationship. I was hurting like hell while she was having fun dating multiple guys. It is what it is. Th…

I was in a 7 year relationship. House, pets, whole deal, just couldn't get married because of her healthcare situation. We promised each other we'd be together forever. She left me for another man …

I am now no contact with my golden child brother and I don’t think we will ever talk again. It is what it is.

They provide a free amazing service, if you can’t be bothered to sign up for it then perhaps it is what it is 

she just threw away all of my thrifted clothes lol, i guess it is what it is

Supposed to go on a second date this weekend but haven't heard back from her since last Sunday. Disappointed but it is what it is. One thing I don't get, why say yes to a second date to begin with if …

Went on a first date last night even though I was very not in the mood for it and almost canceled. He was cool, cute and fun and we had some great conversations. But we are polar opposite schedules an…

The dumper probably regrets it more than you know if the love was truly there. I couldn't find love after I left my woman when I was still young. Now I'm the one in a heart break after the actual love…

> For me, maybe I am naive I'm afraid I would agree for this. You should assume the people from dating apps that you are seeing are seeing other people until told otherwise. And I would disagree th…

I miss the version of her at the beginning of our relationship. The person who actually cared. As time went on, her mask slipped, and the real person emerged, which is unfortunate. I was in love with …

Yeah so. That's why I'm cautious of this conversation. I come from a non-western culture and a non-western context. And the vibe is very different. Even among the more progressive of us. So my view is…

I live overseas and my mental health tanks after a day when I visit my mom. I have accepted reality and today I had to tell her “I am aware my presence bothers you and I will leave soon but until th…

I think so. I live in a mid-sized town. I also think there are other factors that kinda tie into the city's culture, which is unfortunate, but it is what it is, I guess? I'm stuck here for 4-5 more ye…

It is what it is. Either you understand the YouTube culture of having a camera in your face and wanting to not say the wrong thing to a hypothetical question. Vs someone who is just going out there an…

no, OP. you don't get it at all.. From all of your comments, it's clear you don't understand her needs. I was divorced too at once but no kids. Now I am on 2nd marriage. Living on 2 marriages gave me …