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I would take the offered out. What a silly silly boy! The dude really threw a mantrum about sex toys. Do you think this will *improve* as he ages?  I get that it's been 9 years, but it's not ok to m…

This is a support sub. Be kind to each other. — Almost everyone who comes here is here because they are going through a very painful and difficult time. We're not all at our best. If you go into someone's topic, remember that they came here askin…

Think of the comments as inverted Uber ratings. (click to find out what this means) — I last posted a variation of this a little over 5 years ago. We're a little overdue for a repost. --- You know how every Uber rating is right on the verge of 5 stars unless something's particularly …

Manifesting New Skills and Knowledge with the Law of Belief– Is It Possible? — Hi everyone! I’m reaching out to this amazing community because I’m diving deep into the Law of Belief and want to explore how powerful it can truly be.🙏❤️ I keep wondering—can this law actually he…

Addressing Community Concerns: No Porn/Masturbation Addiction Posts and Self-Hate Posts + Revamped Subreddit Rules — Hello everyone. Over the past few months, I have noticed a significant number of you expressing dissatisfaction with the increasing frequency of posts related to NSFW/porn/masturbation addiction and …

My arguments against manifestation — 1. **Maladaptive daydreaming proves that manifestation isn't real**; Manifestation doctrine teaches that what you focus on expands and manifests in your physical reality. Do not split hairs and try to…

A Procedural Update for the Continued Health of Our Subreddit. — Hey everyone on r/NarcissisticAbuse.  We get it, we really do– the U.S. political situation right now is a bloody mess with further escalation, rather than some kind of stability, on the horizon.  W…

The song “I love you, I’m sorry” by Gracie Abrams makes me think of the POV of a DA — I'm DA, and I just listened to this song. It feels like a DA talking about how they sabotaged a good relationship, and they regret it. This line particularly hits: "I like to slam doors closed, trust…

Has anyone else gone from being dismissive avoidant to anxious preoccupied towards their therapist? — As I'm sitting here on a Friday night, missing my therapist despite literally meeting with her today, I'm reflecting on how 5 years ago, and really for the first 2/3 years of therapy I was a closed bo…

Requesting feedback on a landing page design — Hey everyone, hope you're having a great weekend! I just finished designing a landing page for a pest control company and would like some feedback on it. Particularly the bottom section, starting fro…

SEO and Digital Marketing IG accounts — Hi everyone,​ I'm looking for Instagram accounts run by digital marketing agencies that not only offer services like SEO and content marketing but also focus on educating their audience, particularly…

Local/regional prediction market app/site.i will not promote — The title is an open suggested startup idea Cater for particular country/region for MVP Best target country should be the highest gambling culture but at the same time had less regulated policies I …

more open useful o2o platform app.i will not promote — This is an open suggested startup idea sort particularly focus at philippines or emerging markets A sort of early shopee were everyone can buy and sell with no business permit free shipping marketpl…

How to decide what to priorotize when you have limited time? — There are so many levers you can pull to improve a website's SEO performance. How do you actually decide which are more vs less important tasks to do, when you can only do some because of limited hour…

🧵 UI/UX Designers & Developers — Do You Actually Buy UI Kits? — Hi all ???? I'm a designer creating some Figma UI kits (dashboards, mobile applications, and landing page templates spring to mind) and I'm conducting some market research prior to launch. I'd appre…

🧵 UI/UX Designers & Developers — Do You Actually Buy UI Kits? — Hi all ???? I'm a designer creating some Figma UI kits (dashboards, mobile applications, and landing page templates spring to mind) and I'm conducting some market research prior to launch. I'd appre…

Personalized marketing: Questions about segmented waitlists for eCommerce (based on McKinsey Article) — I've been building on Shopify and came across this interesting McKinsey research about personalization that got me thinking about how store owners manage their waitlists in their stores. **Some key i…

Personalized marketing: Questions about segmented waitlists for eCommerce (based on McKinsey Article) — I've been building on Shopify and came across this interesting McKinsey research about personalization that got me thinking about how store owners manage their waitlists in their stores. **Some key i…

Any experience monitoring Redshift — Does anyone have experience monitoring Redshift? We've been having a series of data incidents and we're lacking visibility for what's happening with various jobs. The team usually resorts to tracking …

APPLYING FOR MERCHANT ID — Hey guys, just thought i’d drop in here to quickly as a question for the experienced folks here. I am looking to apply for MIDs but i am kind of stuck on what banks/ Mid providers will look at on my…

How do you keep track of costs across your (AI+SaaS) stack (I will not promote) — We’ve been working on an AI product that touches a ton of different tools: OpenAI, Midjourney, Claude, ElevenLabs, Google Cloud, etc. Recently, we started noticing these random billing spikes, $300 h…

Brightedge for SEO. Please help. — I just got onboarded as a SEO professional for a company that uses Brightedge and frankly I'm a little overwhelmed and confused with the tool. I'm used to using SEMrush, but can't understand the sugge…

Good user interviews? [I will not promote] — Hey r/startups, I've had some recent pain doing user interviews, and I'm wondering if it's something that can be fixed. Every tool I've looked at for help seems expensive, and tbh, pretty shit. I'd …

Show Collection on Home Page based on Customer Tag — I could use some help. I'm using the Dawn theme. I would like to show on the homepage a specific collection section if the customer has a specific tag on their customer account. Obviously they would…

pros/cons of different vc programs for deep tech (i will not promote) — I know there are many specialized accelerators and venture programs tailored to different types of startups. For AI startups — especially those with a strong research orientation — what are the top pr…

Rejected in the final interview after a month long process — This is honestly just a rant post, because I feel completely deflated at this point. I’ve been actively looking for a job for over a year now, moved to Spain three months ago to start a new life, and…

Moz Thoughts — Any thoughts on Moz, particularly for citation building? My agency is looking into it.

Best low-effort analytics tools for Shopify optimization? I'm drowning in data... — I'm struggling to make sense of all the analytics data from my store. The native Shopify reports give me tons of information, but I'm finding it difficult to determine what metrics I should actually f…

Wordpress custom REST API — I have a WordPress-based learning portal with various user roles including Administrator, Tutor Instructor, HR Manager, Accounting Manager, and Academy Instructor. Students are able to log in and view…

Tips regarding upgrading Contour — Hey everyone :) We have a Contour (https://projectcontour.io/) and are a bit behind when it comes to version updates. There is a guide on their website here [https://projectcontour.io/resources/upgr…

Has any ordered from Daddy butter? — First of all, I want to be extremely fair to any business in questioned, they are fairly new business, daddy’s butter. I’ve seen this particular business on Facebook. I’m very impressed with what they…

Need help with some direction — So to keep it short, I need some extra income. I work full time as a software developer, but I now own a house and my bills keep going up, and my salary isn’t. I’ve always had the idea of freelancing…

How do startups choose between Supabase, Firebase, Auth0, and Clerk for auth & DB? What are your must-haves? (I will not promote) — I'm doing some research into how early-stage startups choose backend platforms, particularly when it comes to **authentication and databases**. I’ve seen a lot of teams go with **Supabase**, others sw…

Small business idea for neighborhood store — Hi everyone, I'm based in europe, greece and I’m looking for feedback on starting a small, neighborhood-oriented business that I can run mostly on my own. Here’s what I have: A 110 sq.m. ground-flo…

A little positive reflection for anyone feeling they’re in the trenches right now. — I only learnt what attachment theory was during a breakup with my most recent ex 2 years ago. When he dumped me seemingly out of the blue because ‘I deserved better’, ‘he needed to be alone.’ Etc etc …

Self-soothe tips during ruptures? — I am the anxious partner, and my husband is the avoidant partner. He is also an addict, which has been traumatic in our relationship and in my trust in him. He is currently sober and working recovery.…

What would one call this attachment style? — I feel as tho I'm a pretty particular mix, cause I'm not exactly healthy, but the other labels don't exactly resonate either. I suppose it roots from two main things. One, I was bullied and ostracized…

The most painful relationship/breakup I've ever had, cracked me open for healing. Plot Twist: The text message llm tool said I was an FA, I ignored it for 5 months before I figured it out. — For five months I was absolutely certain I was dismissive avoidant. Monthly attachment coaching—as a DA. Studied obsessively, could recite every AP/DA/FA trait. I even built this text analysis tool, a…

Studying attachment theory — I’ve been studying attachment theory for a couple of months now, and I’ve only recently started to REALLY look into it. I started reading a book called Attachment Disturbances in Adults: Treatment for…

RSD potential cause of AA? — Hey fellow AA folks, Since discovering attachment theory 2+ years ago, life has improved quite a lot. However, for the sake of anyone else who might be fresh to attachment theory, I want to spare yo…

Updated Rules — Hello, your mod here. The rules for this sub have been updated slightly, check them out at your earliest convenience. Basically: 1. Please remember this is not a space to make blanket statements…

Are there any poems that resonate with you in terms of avoidance? — Sorry, wasn't sure what flair to add. This is one poem that particularly gets me. What are some poems (or other works of art) that resonate with you from an attachment standpoint?

PSA: Posts to RBN must be about your parent(s) and/or primary caregiver(s). — Folks, For a while now, we've been getting a steadily increasing amount of posts that we consider to be off-topic. As our subreddit name suggests, submissions must be centred around your parent(s) or…

A Splash of Cold-Water for you — **Background** Hey everyone, I'm a contributor to this subreddit, and spend time lurking from time to time. I'm quite familiar with every attachment style. I, myself, had to earn security from my ow…

I finally realized my fear of closeness is really a fear of being known — I've been working to understand myself better as a DA, in part with the help of Reddit. I now feel the last puzzle pieces fell into place and I finally have a coherent story of why I am the way I am. …

Should I meet up with my ex? — Back in November 2024, I went on a couple of dates with a guy from my friend group, “Frank” (41M now). Looking back, it’s obvious to me that he was a rebound, but I genuinely didn’t realize it at the …

Natal ascendant in the same sign as solar return ascendant - significant or accidental? — Is there any significance to a person’s natal ascendant being the same as the standalone chart cast for their solar return year? For starters, depending on the degree, the houses would be similar, thu…

Women keep telling me I need to date younger and now my daughter has too. — I (39m) look young for my age and have been dating for the last 4 years. I have mostly dated women in their 30s and about half of them have told me to date someone younger after things didn’t work bet…

The most difficult Sun & Moon transits! — I love Robert Hands book ”planets in transit”, and I just saw a listing including the most difficult Sun & Moon transits, which made me curious if anyone had any real life experience that they would l…

Saw the same man I've been seeing as a kid — I'm sorry about the use of A.I but my drawing skills are bad and I don't know how to explain this but I've seen this man in my dreams ever since I was a child. I remember seeing shows like Tom and Jer…

Porn and Energy — I'm interested to hear your views about how porn affects spiritual energy or any particular parts of it in your experience or otherwise.

This is a great read, thank you for the effort put into it. As someone who sort of knew they were emotionally neglected but never really understood it was a real thing before I discovered this sub, t…

Well i was actually thinking about the exact same thing for quite some time. I dont know if you have reached a conclusion about this particular question but if you have then please let me know.

The very first paragraph really struck me. I haven’t learned how to copy text here yet since I’m new to Reddit. But “Non-intrusive and engaged curiosity from parents about what you were feeling and ex…

>Correction: Neville taught to “feel as if”. There were many New Thought authors that taught their students to “act as if”, but Neville primarily taught how to impress your subconscious mind using sle…

sharing recent experience and soliciting feedback from the experienced people here... I live in Phoenix, AZ but have close friends in Richmond, VA. On this particular journey, I had a vivid experien…

I'd just tag on that posters pay attention to all advice posted, regardless of the upvotes/downvotes. The hivemind here can be brutal. This is PARTICULARLY problematic when advice gets legal advice …

I totally agree that there is a general trend to project personal issues and give drastic advice, especially since... well, it's not your life. I particularly notice it when it comes to fear of a par…

To see noticeable changes, it took about 3 weeks. Mind you I was 13 at the time and not particularly motivated. I used a self hypnosis YouTube video (not necessary as I now know), which I only realize…

If you read the Power of your Subconscious Mind, you will know about Lourdes and one particular fascinating healing.

Just believing is one thing, subconscious faith towards your desire (not LOB particularly) is another thing. You lived your entire life based of your default beliefs without even knowing the Law. I sa…

Only these from your long list above, can be argued to relate to the LOB : " *”Whenever He decrees a matter, He says to it, “Be!” and it is.” (Quran 2:117, 3:47, 19:35, 40:68) ☪️* *Prophet Muhamm…

>I get why this sub advocates for SM methods over CM methods, and I absolutely agree that it’s better for beginners, but the problem with exclusively doing this is that you can do all of the work laid…

It’s unhealthy to project or “mind read”. I think there’s a bit of this going on in your post. It may feel (to you) they hate you, because rejection feels bad. It’s not a good feeling to an ego or o…

3 months really isn't long enough to be able to tell that sort of thing with everyone. Of course, some issues can be seen that early, but in my experience it can take 9-24 months to get a more full vi…

Brush up on the company, what they do, their market, etc. Why do you want to be there specifically. Have that answer solid. It’s really important to convince them you’ll like it and therefore try hard…

DevOps has in my opinion always been trial by fire where for many technologies you learn them when you need to learn them. Picking up foundational concepts helps with this greatly, particularly networ…

Looks nice. I mostly use loki. If your company has enough money to license Splunk, they can increase its resources too. Splunk is a beast but not particularly slow.

Discussing LOB with normies is generally a kiss of death, from what I have experienced... we want to share this material, but we may be casting our pearls before swine, and a lot of the swine want to …

Thank you. Still learning to trust my internal compass. Also, wanted to add to those going through 💔 : “grief is love unreturned.” To give closure to yourself you have to grieve. This is why the no…

You're absolutely right to question. This is such the norm in the dating scene, it's crazy! From my experience, what I can say is that you're definitely dealing with a DA type here. Idk if you got int…

Hey there, first off, I really feel your burnout. I've been in that same spot where you have something with potential, but just don't have the energy tank to push it forward. It's brutal. A few thoug…

Man, this post hits SO hard. Running a business is absolutely brutal, and I think we need more honesty about the real toll it takes on founders. I've gone through some of these exact same experiences…

Thank you so much for your answer! So, so much good advice. ''it's really strange, but I can actually feel when I flip from anxious to avoidant.''-- I just wanted to share with you: I too can tell …

I think it’s particularly harmful to people who identify as AP because there is this tendency to find fault within. The people pleasing is so strong that I feel it does more harm than good.

I relate mostly to being anxiously attached or AP and tend usually to score most in that category. But I really relate to everything you described still despite not being DA so perhaps it’s a sign of …

It isn’t. Avoidance, more so than AA, is deeply unconscious. Consciously, we want to show up for our partners and to be vulnerable, which makes it difficult to recognize the fact that we are distancin…

>Low effort comments like, “You sound just like my ex” are equally unhelpful and selfish. Why would anyone care about your ex who we don’t know?! ... >Look up what a rant and vent is. By definition i…

I think skepticism is always warranted. But I would make the case that psychological processes like cognitive dissonance and projection are likely magnified in insecure attachers.   Plus some peopl…

You claimed that the most toxic things APs do is “have too much empathy,” which amusingly points to one of the primary hurdles APs have to overcome in order to heal.  I claim that the most toxic shit …

As others have mentioned this is called, "Hoovering". In attachment theory, particularly with someone who is dismissive avoidant, they may feel threatened by too much intimacy and push you away (brea…

This definitely feels familiar from times in my past as well. The problem is, when we are so inward looking, and introspective about things, while that carries some really strong benefits, it can also…

I was very careful not to speak in absolutes, and I made a very clear distinction between avoidants who are doing the work and those who are not. You are clearly doing the work, so your situation is n…

Yeah but while you can understand where he's coming from, you're not responsible for his fear of rejection, so your instinct to take the time and space to take care of your emerging feelings is actual…

I understand, and it's fine. I'm doing the same in the first early stages of dating. Talking with several people and dating those I feel more connected & attracted to. However, when I focus on someone…

You have to have good information about how the potentially avoidant partner behaved in other relationships. If you hear through that person’s friends that the avoidant tendencies are basically the pe…

Given that I get all my facts from people not related to Sam, any particular AI company, any particular product, and in no way are trying to market an AI product, I'd say I already get my info from pe…

To make sure I’m interpreting this right - you were loving one day, and then the next day you woke up feeling afraid that your trust in him was misplaced? Did he do anything between those two events t…

DBT helped me a lot. You can see if your therapist knows about it or check some free resources like https://dbt.tools/ It has practical things you can actually do when you're feeling anxious. I like…

Thank you for your note, I really appreciated it. Yeah, it was something about her in particular as a FA that completely cracked me - unlike my other relationships, I actually fell in love with her an…

Why not find that fulfilled+wanted feeling through other means—a hobby, travel, other relationships such as family or friends, a job…some passion that is yours and leads to some kind of connection. Wh…

As someone who feels similar to OP, I honestly don't know how easily you can get that same type of feeling through these other things. I'm open to the idea but I guess it doesn't click for me. I hav…

Really great insights, thanks for sharing your thoughts! I think you post gets to the heart of the mission of this sub in particular. Which is about healing ourselves. There is so little in life we ha…

The trick to really becoming secure is to communicate directly, without shouting or "cussing" your needs. Or it's to do so without feeling you should hide your feelings, suppress them, or minimise the…

I definitely suffer from the two questions you asked. And yeah, I think I tend to ignore all the other obvious ways that points to a person caring about me and cherishing me in their life just becau…

It may sound weird but I tried to write my deep feelings and thoughts about my anxious attachment on ChatGPT and it helped me a lot on some precise points, like particular situations that are triggers…

In early dating (first 3-6 months), Most people when establishing a new attachment, experience a period time of obsession with their romantic partner. Their dopamine level is elevated and serotonin i…

I don’t have advice but you perfectly worded one of my main struggles in dating and relationships in general especially the fear of never trusting anyone and just always being so picky and particular …

When you say you "actually like them", what does that really mean? Is that when you've gotten to know them well enough to understand how they approach relationships and communication? When you've seen…

I appreciate how much time you put into this. It’s well written and you’ve got some genuinely interesting ideas here. That said, it’s important to add some context so people don’t mistake this for set…

I agree it’s a bid for connection, but it’s sort of like, with the particular people I’m thinking of, they are seeking me to reassure them instead of to actually connect. It’s often trying too hard, a…