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> And if that person is willing to put in the work with a professional therapist, they can be helped. I think "willing" is the key word here. I'm mostly a lurker here, but I feel like I see "go to t…
Website Rebrand and Redesign Advice — First Let me say: I have absolutely no eye for design. If it is more complex than a stick figure, I cant imagine it in my mind. However, I do know of already existing designs that I love and want to r…
Mentoring available? — Looking for someone to mentor me to become a UX/UI Designer, willing to pay hourly!
How are unemployed designers managing financially right now? — I was laid off two months ago and have been in the job search grind since - applying, interviewing, and trying to stay hopeful. But I’ve also been feeling pretty stressed and anxious, especially as ti…
What to Say When You’re Not the Cheapest Option (And Someone Pushes Back on Price) — I will not promote. This is a best practice I've found in my own works.So, you’re having a great conversation with a potential client and then you get hit with that line: “I know someone who can do it…
Freelancers – the only person that can evaluate your pricing is the buyer (not Reddit) — *(TL;DR at bottom)* Questions like this pop up on this subreddit every few weeks: > How much should I charge for a basic website? Or: > Is $500 for a single-page Figma design a good price? ...and…
[EU] Can't get suppliers as a new small business — Every decent supplier I've contacted basically says "we don't care about your small shit business", only ones willing to sell are some small companies that sell random junk and surplus nobody wants to…
Custom price Dev Paid — Hey everyone, I'm a WordPress developer and coming to Shopify has been really hard hahaha I'm looking to implement custom pricing. So i have products with variant, the price is per square meter. And…
Marketplace Connect changed 12000 Amazon inventory items to 0 ! Has this happened to anyone? I can't get help uploading a product list I downloaded. — What a nightmare! This experience has been devastating! The software is supposed to be safe... how on earth does it change all my inventory to 0 and no one is willing to help me fix it?? I have gone a…
What would you be willing to pay for at your company? — Over the years, we’ve seen several licensing dramas and ongoing debates even on this sub — the latest being Redis becoming open source again. Someone once said: “I'm fine with companies making money …
Seeking Technical Co-Founder for Fantasy Football Punishment Platform (I will not promote) — Hey everyone, I’m in the process of building an exciting startup focused on **fantasy football** and I’m looking for a **technical co-founder** to join me and help bring this idea to life. The core i…
Need technical help; streaming platform dev. I will not promote. — Hello I am looking for someone who can build a streaming site (many different users stream live to viewers). The specific niche and competitive angle can be discussed in more detail, but at the core …
Need technical help; streaming platform dev. I will not promote. — Hello I am looking for someone who can build a streaming site (many different users stream live to viewers). The specific niche and competitive angle can be discussed in more detail, but at the core …
Adventures of a South African Engineer: Lessons from 3 Startups (I will not promote) — **Adventures of a South African Engineer: Lessons from 3 Startups** These are a few things I have come to learn while doing "startups," maybe it will help some entrepreneurs in their startup travels.…
How to build a marketplace from scratch? I will not promote — Hey guys! I hope you are all good. I am currently developing an MVP for a marketplace I talked with some people, and would be willing to participate on. However, although I am making my own research,…
New Tool For Creators? — *This isn’t a promotion or a sales post — I’m just looking for honest feedback on my idea* Hey everyone! I’m offering a first-of-its-kind privacy service for influencers and content creators. I creat…
Shopify Support is the absolute WORST — I have had issues with payouts- as in first they disable my payouts for verifaction then I get an email saying everything is okay and then within hours without no communication or email, I´ve checked …
I'm lucky enough to have turned my podcast into a full time job - here's what I wish I had known — Hey all! Love this community. I'm really blessed to have turned my podcast into a full time job, getting over 200k downloads across 15 episodes upon launch. I'm working on more seasons, but I have had…
Why almost all of libraries are free? — Like in the title. I am geniunly baffled why most of libraries are free to use. Things like react, angular, react query, redux, zustand etc... they all probably took loads of time to develop and stil…
What is the ideal way to instruct a web programmer on how you want the page to function? — Hello, Im trying to start an online Store and ive a few programmers willing to work with me. Ive seen some programmers here telling their Experiences with some customers saying to them “I want to bui…
Would web developers be interested in a business that analyzes their websites and helps improve monetization? — First-time poster here—apologies if I’m slightly off-topic. I’m planning to build a website that helps website owners improve how they monetize their sites. I’d like to know if there are people who …
i will not promote: help finding willing creators! — Hey guys, I just launched an app and am looking to try out influencer marketing to promote it (TikTok specifically). We have been reaching out to content creators with emails in their bio but response…
Duolingo leader throws shade at r/UXDesign — You all might remember this thread a few months ago, [debating Duolingo renaming UX to “Product Experience.”](https://www.reddit.com/r/UXDesign/comments/1j3hvkw/duolingo_renames_ux/) The VP Mig announ…
New Monochrome Theme — Hey yall, I have been researching and trying out different themes to use since I have been on the free themes and I want to upgrade my shop to a paid template. There is a new theme called Monochrome t…
Built Artificial Intelligence driven accounting prototype for small businesses — struggling to find beta users. Any advice?(Tried LinkedIn as well) — I’ve recently developed a prototype of an Artificial Intelligence powered accounting tool tailored specifically for small businesses — the kind that typically have just one in-house accountant or rely…
Marketing Agent — Hey guys, been tinkering with an AI marketing tool and would love your take. It’s good at content creation, custom posts, ads, and captions. It also auto-schedules and posts them at the best times for…
How to find willing creators?!? (TikTok) — Hey guys, I just launched an app and am looking to try out influencer marketing to promote it (TikTok specifically). We have been reaching out to content creators with emails in their bio but response…
How to find willing creators?!? — Hey guys, I just launched an app and am looking to try out influencer marketing to promote it (TikTok specifically). We have been reaching out to content creators with emails in their bio but response…
Any Luck with TikTok Influencer Marketing? And where do you find them? — Hey guys, I just launched an app and am looking to try out influencer marketing to promote it (TikTok specifically). We have been reaching out to content creators with emails in their bio but response…
Seeking honest feedback on an early mockup for a sustainable toothbrush brand — Hey everyone! I’m working on creating a sustainable toothbrush brand and I’m still in the early stages. The name, logo, and product design aren’t final yet. Before I move forward, I’d love to hear yo…
Seeking self-closure — To give a brief overview. Had a multi year situationship with someone I had fallen for, a fearful avoidant. Much pulling and pushing until it ended by her pushing everything away. A year later she st…
Help me to recognise my attachment style please! — I (26F) am struggling with this a lot, since my patterns of romantic behavior don’t seem to fit neatly into any of the four categories (AA, FA, DA, SA). On the one hand, I clearly crave intimacy and…
A message to earnestly curious skeptics and non-experiencers: How to engage experiencers within this community and learn about the topic. — We are seeing an increase of activity from people outside of experiencer circles in threads as time has moved on and more and more people are starting to understand there really is a "there there" and…
Having trouble differentiating between anxious attachment / normal needs, feeling lost and alone — First Reddit post here! (It's a long one, I just really need a place to put it all down and get some support, so thank you). I (19F) got out of my first long term relationship about 3 months ago. It l…
I earned secure attachment in 4 months... — I can't believe I'm writing this. I did this without dating a secure person and without spending money on courses/apps. I promise I'm not selling anything. Big disclaimers: * I am only mostly secure…
Today marks 6 months since we last saw and spoke to each other — As the person on the receiving end of testing behaviors, ghosting, and a discard, I would love to hear that my former flame is doing well or even an apology. We have known each other for almost…
How does the process look transitioning from dismissive avoidant to secure? — I'm 44 and have slowly worked out there's something up with me, to finding out about this term and seeing a lot of myself in fellow sufferer's description of it. My life is full of unrealistic expe…
The pain of being unmet... — I'm never sure whether to consider myself anxiously attached, or mostly secure, because I generally do fine if I feel really loved in my relationship. But where I fall apart easily is when I don't. I …
8+ Months of LOB practice ( Update from my 1st post ) — Hi everyone, Some of you may remember me from my last post where I did an update of my situation at 4 months in, practicing LOB. After that post, I decided as was recommended to lower the progress g…
A Splash of Cold-Water for you — **Background** Hey everyone, I'm a contributor to this subreddit, and spend time lurking from time to time. I'm quite familiar with every attachment style. I, myself, had to earn security from my ow…
Can I get some assurance from reformed people pleasers 🥲? — And some advice? Not necessarily on "what to do" because I know how to set boundaries in theory. It's managing the guilt and fear of fallout that I struggle with and I do because all my life any time …
I finally realized my fear of closeness is really a fear of being known — I've been working to understand myself better as a DA, in part with the help of Reddit. I now feel the last puzzle pieces fell into place and I finally have a coherent story of why I am the way I am. …
Should I meet up with my ex? — Back in November 2024, I went on a couple of dates with a guy from my friend group, “Frank” (41M now). Looking back, it’s obvious to me that he was a rebound, but I genuinely didn’t realize it at the …
Why do so many high achievers seem to have strong Rahu placements? — I’ve been looking at charts of highly successful or influential people and noticed that many of them seem to have strong Rahu placements, especially in angular houses (1st, 7th, 10th) or closely influ…
Would anyone be willing to share the format of their fear inventory? If you did one. — Hi, I am looking to do a fear inventory, would anyone be open to sharing the format or headings they used please? Or a link to the one they used? Thanks in advance.
Why Manifestation can FEEL Forced and Unrealistic (Success & Guidance) — Today I came upon a realization that many people do not have for most of their lives. It was the realization that our feelings and the meanings that we attach to them are also affirmations. Right no…
My boyfriend and I had an argument over his marriage demands, and now he claims he means none of it... — Tl:dr: My boyfriend of two years has a list of requirements from me after we get married, and after our argument over it, which lead us to break up-- he said he didn't mean any of it and wants to go …
I have done absolutely horrible things. I might be the worst human being to ever live. — 20M. This might be the longest post you'll ever read. I believe I have OCD and do nothing but ruminate 24/7 about my past. I have been in isolation for the last 3 years. It started as a fear of adult…
Broke up with DA after a year. — Met her a year ago, almost to the day. Things started well, relatively slowly which was nice for a change compared to other situations I have been in around that time. After two months, we became offi…
How do you stay present even when you are feeling the pressure to run? — My bf and I are long distance and he's very very very loving and sweet. The best bf I could have ever asked for. He understands and accepts my feelings even when I'm feeling avoidant, but right now I'…
What are the most infuriating sentences your ex has said to you during or after the breakup? — For me it would be : "I have no hatred or resentment, and I don’t regret the year we spent together." Cool. I’m glad it was such a pleasant memory for you. Personally I was still trying to process ho…
We are all completely different and unique individuals, we all discover it according to our level and willingness of consciousness. >why can't i? \^ you can, everyone can, some may just need to work…
I sometimes question though: was it good that we would have stayed with them forever? If they were that disinterested? Wouldn’t it be a bad choice on our part to stay with them? I know what you…
What if I ruined the chance of possibly not getting back together due to me being an emotional abuser??For example, she broke up with me because of unhappiness, goal of finishing her college degree, a…
At first you tell yourself it’s the only way to get them back. You give yourself little pep talks like “I’ll commit to NC for at least 1 month” Then you realize that ur surviving without them and the…
Is there anyone skilled at astral projection who might be willing to speak with me?
Any mentors out there willing to chat? I'm worried I'm digging myself into a hole working with a custom on-prem cloud solution. Anyone willing to chat, I'd be extremely grateful.
I am new to Reddit as of today, so forgive my lack of knowledge if this is the wrong place to ask this! Also I’m new in the AP world, but I have an open mind! I’m going to start going through some of…
I had to add this: (In situations where they have intentionally/willingly hurt you) If your tears/pleads didn’t eat them up then your silence won’t either. They don’t give a fuck about you & That’s …
If you can't count on someone, then a secure person accepts it and moves on. If you're both at fault and want to reconcile, you reach out and have a talk and see if you're both willing to work on thin…
Tysm for posting this compendium and summary. I can feel your sense of kindness and willingness to share with others when so many might gatekeep or be hostile. ❤️
The best advice I could give is to envision this, if you are having a hard time holding on to this vision for hoping the future will lead you to back together and you will not let anything happen to p…
To me, right now, this is so simple but so profound. In my own journey I’m struggling for understanding, for rationale, for healing and resolution, and ultimately closure with a partner who is unwilli…
I have a feeling that many parents who emotoinally neglect were neglected themselves. How can you learn to connect with your child if that was never modeled to you? So many children were and still ar…
Hello, I'm Kale, and Im 34. I was just married 3 months ago after being in a loving 8+ year relationship with the kindest person I've ever met. Three days ago she told me she had developed a relation…
Another green flag (on reddit in general honestly) is anyone willing to ask for info/context before giving their thoughts and anyone willing to provide more info/context when asked. Those are two thin…
They took the Ellis Island poem too seriously - “Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, the wretched refuse of your teeming shore…” We’re a country of legal immi…
Hey there! It’s great that you’re so self aware. I would say (since you asked for advice!) is that you could work on your anxious type behaviours, otherwise they tend to just push us avoidants away ev…
I feel you. I’ll give you my experience as a FA then suggestions. - I also transitioned from anxious to avoidant our the years. I was never full on AA but more anxious leaning FA as a child. Now I l…
I think it really depends on the partner and how willing they are to communicate. In my last relationship I was avoidant leaning secure and my partner was preoccupied. There were certain things I thou…
It is extremely difficult to *start* the healing process while in a relationship as you would be required to balance other factors (is the other party willing to work too? What is their level of healt…
It’s kind of saddening/comical to see how majority of these posts go “my partner / ex is avoidant. They are the best thing since sliced bread and I’ve already read 102839172 books on their attachment …
Simply get back to the things that give me joy in life. Nature, cycling, career progression, healthy cooking, travel, caving, gym, movie buff, research, etc. Never abandon my identity ever again when …
I was very much like you, and I had lots of commitment issues. I didn’t want to be anyone’s “girlfriend”, because I felt I would lose freedom, so I would willingly choose unavailable people because I …
It was difficult untill last summer when I joined a men’s group, and got some feedback to my story… at the same time I was deeply committed to learning about avoidant’s and how they manage (or more to…
Yes, you think it's BS because it validates your fears. And just because something is 'imprecise' doesn't mean it's not useful, or effective. Otherwise we wouldn't have hundreds of studies on variou…
You are correct. Your perception of love is warped. And thus it can be really hard finding it without accidentally finding yourself in shit relationships. As many have commented, avoidants typically …
It's very, very painful. I'm so sorry. I went through something similar 2 yrs ago. Couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, felt incredible low self-esteem and rejected. I never pegged him to ghost me, and we ha…
As a man who has been on both sides of the coin… bear with me cause this is a long read but it has relevance I promise. I’ve been the anxious wreck begging and pleading. Saying stuff like “you don’t…
ok so i typed up a hypothetical example haha let's say i have a coworker/acquaintance who seems like they'd have a lot in common with me, but we don't know each other well. i want to become closer to…
Your partner sounds Fearful avoidant, is he aware of his attachment style? I think all you can do is let him know in as blame-free way as possible that you notice a pattern in his behaviour that con…
Stop stepping into a mummy role. You can’t help your partner, he’s a grown ass 40 year old man who needs to step up and help himself. There are tons of free resources available as well as therapy and …
Hmm. My experience so far is that I will use different attachment styles depending on circumstance. Most people I think have a default, e.g. A person who comes from a secure background will be willi…
If it's an associate level role, then you should be fine. You have software experience, (and assuming everything you said above is accurate) you expressed a basic understanding of the technologies, a…
" I just see a completely different thing on Reddit but when I read the teachings it's so simple lol." Honeybunch, if it was SOOO simple, you and most everyone else on reddit would have their mill…
Congrats! Think the most important thing is to pinpoint the right content niche - high demand, but also from well-paid individuals so that advertisers are willing to work with you. Not easy. I had a g…
A good starting point in understand pricing 'science' is Willingness to Pay or WTP analyses. This concept and its parameters (intrinsic v. extrinsic) will give you a framework that you can apply towar…
Referral relationships are great. Find someone that is already working with your target customer and structure a referral relationship (commissions / referrals back / discounted services in exchange f…
But isn't it just you bending over backwards while she's exactly where she was? This sounds like a project and you can see positive results so it might feel good. But imagine, there's someone out ther…
Yes my own experiences, but also if you read comments/posts not just from Reddit, you will find very common themes across the board with relationships with avoidants, the truth is it’s very difficult …
wow, i coulda wrote that with my FA girlfriend! i had a very similar journey and whatta roller coaster of emotions it was for a year or so. i’ve dated my fair share of avoidants in my youth, didnt r…
Thank you I just love everything you wrote. I felt like despite liking me a lot, my ex DA would sometimes talk as if he had contempt towards me. As for one friend she definitely had some kind of "Im b…
I see your point, but another watchout is my recent ex did go to therapy (which I took as a green flag) but he ended up having a fling with the therapist afterward (huge red flag) and the only takeawa…
This seems like you’re taking normal boundaries and attributing malice to them… If i feel someone is hurting me more than helping or asking for more than they are willing to give, i have every right t…
I agree with this, but also want to point out some DAs don’t actually communicate a boundary. I had two ex’s who were DA and I can lean anxious. Both were very inconsistent in communicating “I need sp…
Alright unfortunately it’s impossible for me to determine whether she is actually losing interest or if she is having trouble regulating her own emotions, but what you need to do in both cases is let …
They need to doesn’t mean they can every time, especially when they’re aware and trying to break the pattern. If you’re not willing to support them through the slip ups then the relationship just won’…
Everyone always gets hurt... we are human beings. Expecting not to get hurt ever is not going to happen. You can't actually change your behaviour without engaging with other people, and you cannot con…
You should also consider that there's a big difference when you are dating someone for months or being with someone for years (and the attachment style for example resurfaces after marriage and child …
It’s not about trying to fix them - they ultimately have to fix themselves. It’s about having empathy and realizing that we’re all just a bunch of messed up people trying to keep ourselves safe. If s…
By not chasing and instead matching their pace. Absolutely reply when they text you, and match the energy if you can. Ideally you’d want to be perceived as safe, so when they text you should be detach…