Hoovered

Three years and he placed you last again. Smh. He relegated you to a booty call.😪 My ex tried that after a 4 year relationship. He started texting and calling, and I agreed to meet him for a game of …

Am I (26f) throwing away my relationship with my (30m) boyfriend? — ​ I 26/F have been with my BF 30/M for almost 4 years (june). I have been unhappy for at least 2 of these years. we have talked it out multiple times, he usually cries and becomes very upset w…

Something I wished I had heard about sooner when I struggled leaving my now nex that would've made me leave a lot earlier. — Why we stay is because of trauma bond and hope even though they play on that and say to you "if I am abusive why don't you leave", unhealed empaths stay because we delude themselves on what they could…

Struggling with self worth nearly a year later even though I was the one that left? — It's been almost a year since I left and I still struggle with feeling like I wasn't good enough for him. And I don't get it because throughout our relationship, I left him multiple times and got hoov…

Hoover — I got hoovered and I feel so stupid. We were long distance and it has been about two years since we initially broke up. She attempted to get me back shortly after she dumped me, I resisted and then so…

Being hoovered, need advice — EDIT: Read some books and now understand that total silence, zero responses are the only way out of this. Thanks for the supportive comments :) I (38M) finally broke it off and I felt so free. But I …

what if i was the narc between us and had it all wrong? how can i tell? — he was definitely avoidant, never took accountability, and would disappear, and give the silent treatment but i was the one that would chase, bombard his phone with calls and texts, go around his bloc…

5 Years Later: A Retrospective On Complimentary Dysfunctions — Hey everyone 👋🏽 Found this sub, looking to gather insight/feedback on what I currently experience as someone who lives with a trauma bond to a Narc - but also to share my findings, in hopes it enco…

Mine had a big dog, 2 big cats (Maine coons), and 2 ferrets. *While living in a small mobile home!* She had dozens of chickens previously too. The ferrets were discarded shortly after i was Hoovered…

I restarted after a 6.5 year relationship came to an end at 28. I didn't have the option of another place so had to go back to parents. It is better to restart now as you can build the life you want a…

Mine hoovered me and slept with me SOOOO much even after ‘learning’ about alllll the bad things I ‘did’ to them. Meanwhile they were turned on by me, what I could achieve in the bedroom, and the fact …

He and I were new to dating. Only a few months together. He said she was the biggest monster, etc. but the truth slowly trickled out that it was he that was the monster. There were lots of red flags…

Look at the comments, some have had their nex come here. All they have to do is look for unique words that are relevant.    These groups sometimes have narcs infiltrate them because theres victims f…

I left 5 years ago. We were separated for a whole year. All assets divided and custody figured out. We went to mediation and everything. Then, I was hoovered back in. I was free for a whole year! Th…

YES!!! Whenever it helped her get attention or make an excuse for something. The first time I really fought back and blew up against the subtle abuse, she hoovered by telling me that she treated me ba…

OMG the same thing happened to me as well. i set a boundary as he only sexts and never checks up on me, he vanished three days from social media, phone off claimed it was broken, came back checked up …

You are valid. But YOU have the power to make the suffering stop. Every time I start to ruminate I tell myself “nope, we aren’t doing that” then I start to think of something that is productive, or …