hanging out

Do you and your husband have any support network or is it just you guys parenting without help? My grandmother was so instrumental in being the extra parent I needed. If you have a grandparent, aunt, …

Struggling with losing my best friend/coworker, anxious attachment + limerence making it unbearable — Hi everyone, I apologize in advance for this long post. I’ll just post the TL;DR at the start. TL;DR: Lost my best friend/coworker of 7 years after a conflict. He’s now cold/avoiding me but friendl…

What would one call this attachment style? — I feel as tho I'm a pretty particular mix, cause I'm not exactly healthy, but the other labels don't exactly resonate either. I suppose it roots from two main things. One, I was bullied and ostracized…

I'm so tired of people. — For reference, a couple of years ago, I was in an abusive relationship that kinda changed who I am. I won't go into too much detail, but let's just say that I used to be outgoing and fun, but also I h…

Anyone have the experiance of anxious attatchment killing you as a person — I never see anyone talking about this and im wondering if its normal. Ever since i got in my relationship 2 years ago, i cant seem to find any passion within myself. The passion for my intrests and ho…

Are pre-birthday discards the norm? — I’m trying to understand this through attachment theory because I genuinely don’t know what just happened. We’re both women. I was 23 with a grad degree, she was 38 and just got her culinary degree w…

F**CKKKKKKKKK — I don’t really have anywhere to say this, so I’m just putting it here. I was with someone for a long time who I truly believed was my person. From the beginning, there was just something about her th…

I recently found out my close friend slept with my girlfriend while we were together. I'm struggling with how to process it. — I’m a 22-year-old Japanese guy and I recently learned something that completely changed how I see a lot of people in my life. About a year and a half ago I was in a serious relationship. We lived tog…

Share your most insane ‘money just appeared’ story — Here's mine: A while back life really hit me hard. I just got out of the hospital with a $4,000 bill which is huge where I live since most healthcare is government covered. My job fired me while I was…

Understanding Infidelity — Last year, I (25M) broke up with my now ex girlfriend (26F). We were together for 3 years and were living together at the time, but I discovered that she was cheating on me with a coworker of hers for…

My ex called me a “walking green flag” when we first started dating, and then I ruined it all — I can’t live with myself. I hate how relationships sometimes bring out the worst in people. I went from the best boyfriend (my first relationship too) and now it’s been 3 months since the breakup and …

(trip report) Telepathic communication through high doses of psilocybin — Dose: 8g (Myself), 5g (Brayden, first time), others 3–4g Setting: Friend’s house, nearby park, neighborhood walk Time: 3:00 PM – 9:00 PM Participants: 5 friends So a couple years ago me and my …

What We Really Need To Heal — Not sure if anyone else feels this way: but I'm kinda over all the "healing" stuff. Because it doesn't work. And I think there's too much pressure on survivors to "heal". The only way that we can …

I was in Barbados… Well actually it was Turks and Caicos but close enough! — I was in Barbados… Well actually it was Turks and Caicos but close enough I just came back from a 4 week long vacation in Turks and Caicos in the Caribbean. This was the 10th year in a row I have don…

My husband [M31] let slip in a compliment that he thinks his ex was prettier than me [F28] and I can't stop thinking about it. How do I let it go? — EDIT: I have made an update to this post for everyone, see here: [https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship\_advice/comments/1rwh3g2/update\_my\_husband\_m31\_let\_slip\_in\_a\_compliment/](https://www.r…

Just got some news. — We're three months out from finalizing the Big D. I still have a hard the saying the word. She wanted to get together tonight to "catch up on some things" and to go over possible tax paperwork since w…

You are God. — you can manifest anything and everything. I say this as someone who has been into this community since i was 10. I used to try manifesting height, weight loss, friends, parents to stop arguing, everyt…

Mom! There's a Flying Car Outside the Window + And Other DR Memories — https://preview.redd.it/qg8vkwaixvpg1.png?width=1024&format=png&auto=webp&s=ddddae1cd2fa8a918133c6c3655c21cd7e63afd6 https://preview.redd.it/am1xwmqjxvpg1.png?width=680&format=png&auto=webp&s=2814916…

Almost 1 year since I left... And I just started my own business!! I'm living in MY own apartment and I own everything I need — I decide how ALL of my days are gonna go now! FU! — I can't say it to my nex(because I am keeping absolute no-contact), but I'll say it here, hell I will scream it: #Fuck You!! Fuck you for every time you put me down Fuck you for every time you deci…

I'm so sick of laying in bed — don't know what to do. I work a regular 40 hour office job that's not even that difficult or stressful. But as soon as I'm home, I end up in bed. Even showering feels like a chore. Getting out of bed…

Finally detached! Flying, static vision, and a sudden "lust-induced" snapback. Advice needed! — Hey everyone! I’ve been actively practicing for a while now—listening to 6 Hz theta waves and binaural beats, focusing on breathwork, and consciously lowering my heart rate. This morning around 9:00 A…

In love with my (26F) best friend (27M) and it’s killing me — Me and my best friend have only been besties for about 3-4 years, but we grew close extremely quickly. I initially didn’t find him attractive at all, and we were also not single at the time, but aft…

How do I F21 fix my relationship with my F21 twin sister after her M22 fiancée SA’d me? — I don’t really know how to do this I apologize in advance. A bit of back ground. I am a F21. My twin sister obviously the same age. We both live with our parents. She has been seeing this guy M22 for …

What is the difference between being too clingy/attached and being neglected? — Theres no doubt I have a codependent relationship with my best friend (scrolling through the top posts of this sub did it) and it caused her to want a second break from me. I really want to change for…

Growing apart from people — What should I do when I am growing away from people in my life? I am a 21 year old and I am in a sorority where I have my best friend ! Outside of that I have an amazing boyfriend and a couple of clos…

Decidedly Single? — Have any of you found that it’s just better to be single and to not get romantically involved with anyone? I (34f) recently ended things with the last guy I was talking to for over a year and with wh…

Why are koreans so class/status conscious? — \*\* here, 'koreans' mean korean-koreans or first gen korean immigrants, not korean americans who tend to be more chill in my experience. I'm a first gen immigrant. I'm posting it here in a hope to ge…

My full story 2 weeks since DDay 4 days NC — (Cheater fiancée 26f) (me 26m) (AP 46m) So it all started about 4 to 6 months ago I noticed that her drinking had become a concern she was showing up drunk after work very frequently and it was both…

Contemplating if I should reach out — So I’m 20F and dated my ex-boyfriend for a year and a half. We broke up a little over a year ago. We went to college together and went through lots of traumatic situations and so much change together.…

Fiancé ended our 12 year relationship after meeting a new guy — Caitlyn, I'm sorry, and I miss you and still love you. I can't function. I can't sleep. I don't know what to do, and I don't know how much of this was me, and how much of this was him. Everyone has to…

Should I Take My Ex Out For Her Birthday? — So my ex girlfriend 20f and I 21M broke up about 4 months ago due to emotional boundaries being crossed with her male friend and I was so stressed and anxious about it that I did not think it was heal…

My situationship doesn’t want a relationship but still has feelings for me?? — Please don’t call me delulu, because I’ve had my fair share of avoidant weirdos, but I don’t think he is one. Been talking to this guy since December. Things were great. The chemistry was there. The c…

am i childish for not being able tolet go? — its a little complicated we didnt just date and break up, i mean we kinda did but there was a lot before that. im gonna start from the beginning. i will skip a bit of unimportant stuff just keep in m…

Thinking about my ex constantly — ​ I haven't stopped thinking about my ex since we've broken up. I've been with my ex from the end of February to half of August last year. Since then, she's been on my mind almost non-stop. I …

breakup with someone who didn’t communicated issues — My ex (20M) and I (20F) broke up at the beginning of March after almost a year together, and I’m having a hard time moving on. It felt like a really special connection to me. He made me feel genuinel…

How do you stop feeling like you're waiting — Its been two months since my breakup and 2 months of NC. I want to reach out in a month or so when I have an actual benchmark of sobriety on my addiction. I'm living my life. I'm hanging out with fri…

The moment when everything clicked after the discard. Does this pattern strongly point to NPD? — Hey everyone. After a recent brutal and totally blindsiding discard by someone who I thought loved me, Im trying to understand what I experienced (almost 1 year relationship and attempt at reconnectio…

I told people in another reality I shifted to their reality - this was their reaction જ⁀➴ ♡ — hey everyone, this is such an odd post but I had this experience last night and I wanted to share it with you guys because it is kind of silly and I feel like this is the perfect community to share it…

I 27m tryna come back from enmeshment from my bsf pwBPD 21f... — Yeah so over the last few months she really missed me and wanted to be w me nonstop and i sorta caved even tho i was against the idea. Ig im her FP. Anyways i just realized how ENMESHED i was when s…

My ex (30F) and I (30nb) broke up 6 months ago and I want to vent about it — After dating for almost 2 years and living together for 6 months my ex broke it off and I had to move out. I am a trans nonbinary person (AFAB) and the day we met my ex knew I would be pursuing gender…

How to accept your never getting back with a person — I just got broken up with 2 weeks ago. My ex has bpd and tends to keep exs, situationships, and other guys around. Two weeks before we broke up she started hanging with her ex again and I’m assuming t…

Eating with chopsticks — I went to an Asian restaurant (in a non-Asian area) with a white colleague. Everything seemed alright but I noticed she had some issue with me using chopsticks. Ok, I'm not the greatest at chopsticks…

Life has broken me: depression, bad health, shitty jobs, and an emptiness that even therapy can’t fix — Hey, I was in treatment for severe depression and it turned out a lot of it was actually untreated attention/concentration disorder. With the meds I’m more stable now — my brain only works when you f…

The wound reopens everytime I see them. — My ex broke up with me a month ago after a long term relationship and got with the guy they told me not to worry about just a week ago. Their friend group began treating me weird after the breakup and…

Am I (20F) controlling for wanting my husband (21M) to cut out his only friend in town? — For some context, my husband and I got unexpectantly pregnant very young, and had our baby at 18. By the time our son was born, all of our friends had moved away for college or other ventures. The onl…

How long did some of you wait until you started seeing other people? — For context; My wife (24F) of 4 years (we've been together 10 total years) is divorcing me (26M). Our divorce will be finalized next month. I was extremely sad in the beginning and like most men o…

Who's up for joining me in a manifestation challenge? — UPDATE: hey guys! I'm so happy so many people have wanted to join the challenge ❤️ just wanted to offer a quick update. I've seen some movement with my SP, we were no contact prior to this post. He's …

I [28M] am afraid woman I'm dating [26F] is about to back out of relationship after reluctantly agreeing to exclusivity. — Me \[28M\] and Lea \[26F\] have been seeing each other for exactly 3 months now. We met through hinge back in the first week of January and had an explosive first date which ended in us sleeping toget…

My (27M) gf (23F) of two months wants to start hanging out at her parents house more and I’m feeling overwhelmed — Im really independent and have been living on my own for about 7 years now and don’t have the greatest relationship with my family. My family dynamics are way different from hers. Mine are more distan…

Soul crushing loneliness is one of the worst parts for me. — I always feel different in a group setting. Every single time. It doesn't matter if it's strangers, classmates, even friends. I'm always the weird one. I never belong anywhere. And that's just how it'…

Embarrassed for feeling deep abandonment with small stuff like coworkers leaving or mutual friends hanging out together w/o me? — In my younger years this was a big problem, I wouldn't understand what I was feeling and would lash out like if a friend said they could hang out one day, but then said actually I can't something else…

I just need to vent: 10 years wasted would’ve been our 11th in a few weeks. We broke up last week due to an argument that we had. We were supposed to go to a concert together. She asked me “what time…

So pardon the length (I haven't told anyone yet) and thank you for reading. I might have a crush on a good friend ("Steve") who I've reconnected with after a few years of not hanging out. We didn't …

Yes. I was with a dismissive avoidant and I divorced him, and then my older sister is a DA as well and I have been regaining my voice after I left my ex. So I have set very limited time to talk to my …

We were always hanging out it just wasn’t in person. We kept in contact so much and stole little phone calls whenever we could. I actually think we spent more time connected than I did with any boyfri…

Thank you so much for this. I am really hurting. Yes, he messaged me On Sunday evening my time saying “Hey baby!! I’m back, I’m so sorry for not being able to communicate.. I know it’s been a little…

I’m not a DA but I do need space. Fortunately, my friends have always understood that, and I haven’t had to communicate it. I feel like they are kind of the same and everything just feels super natura…

I'm an FA that leans anxious, and this never bothers me unless I'm in romantic relationships. Platonic relationships with friends that disappear never hits the same for me. Quite honestly, and as som…

Anxious woman here and there was one Secure guy whom I was extremely drawn to and was interested in dating but he didn't noticed me because he was in love with an Avoidant woman. Even during that time…

If there is no sex and no commitment but two people enjoy hanging out, Is that not a friendship? Or at least a friendship where the guy is settling for the friend zone even though he wants more.

The fact that she brought it up so early, to me, is a green flag. Those who have been repeatedly hurt by FAs would say it’s a green flag in a sea of red, but IMO to be able to openly have discussions …

So I (38M)'ve just been dumped again by someone who picked up on my attachment anxiety, and I'm extremely frustrated because I'm pretty far along my healing journey, but not finished yet obviously, an…

Hello, so I've recently started seeing this coworker and we've had some fun so far. I like her and I'd like to believe she likes me. We've only hooked up before and I've tried to ask if she would want…

Um...I guess with this friend, I pushed for us to talk more, and when she showed interest, I became ambivalent because what if we talked more and she realized I was boring or not cool to hang out with…

I'm anxiously attached to a friend of mine who broke up with her longtime partner 4 months ago. I made the mistake of telling her 2 months ago that I have feelings for her. I'm not sure now if I reall…

Yes. I just thought about this recently. As of 2 days ago. And I figured I would start trying to see my romantic interests as friends as well. That way a lot of the pressure is off. I am dating a guy …

I think my boyfriend (33M) and I (30F) might break up and I can’t tell if it’s my fault. This might be a long story so I’m sorry in advance. My boyfriend and I usually text most of the day, every day…

I am going through this exact same scenario right now with a girl. I met her while traveling and got her number, and we've spent time on Discord hanging out together. Eventually, I asked her if I coul…

I definitely suffer from the two questions you asked. And yeah, I think I tend to ignore all the other obvious ways that points to a person caring about me and cherishing me in their life just becau…

28M and I’ve dated a decent number of women over the last 10 years. I’ve noticed a pattern that always seems to repeat itself. When I meet someone I’m attracted to but not *that* into at first, I sta…

Lol! That's a great example, thanks for sharing. There are times where I wish he was around more for quality time, like when he's busy/traveling for work/helping fix his mom's house/playing golf and …

I have no advice for you, but I'm in the exact same situation. I can tell myself not to think about our lives together, but then find my thoughts doing the exact same thing 2 minutes later. The only t…

I'm trying to explain that the intentional exclusion is likely due to your manager status. And while it's okay at your company, your direct reports may feel differently. If I were to spend lunch tryi…

I, M29, have been in a long-distance relationship for 6 months now with a Fearful Avoidant. Before this relationship, I had always thought that I'd be secure in a relationship after 2 years of therapy…

I don't know how to deal with my anxious feeling. My friend has recently started trying to date again. They and another friend had been dating previously, which I didn't have an issue with. I never ha…

I am a 65 year old professional man, happily married to another man 25 years. Recently I started reaching out to make more straight "bro" friends because I really don't like the gay scene, (gay men ta…

We met at a mutual friends by surprise and have been hanging out. They showed up fine in the past and it’s been a long time. I don’t know if he’s being slow and cautious or avoidant I can’t tell. I th…

I could have written this post myself. I turn 27 in a month. And well, I have never been in a real relationship (although I dated for a while in a very avoidant non-committed way that makes me feel st…

Genuine question, can you actually pinpoint why you're feeling that way and where it originally came from? A lot of our attachment issues are largely independent from our partners, even though they c…

Hi everyone, curious to hear other people's thoughts on my situation since I'm not sure if I'm "stuck" so to speak I (29m, AP) have been talking to a woman (27f, FA) for almost a year now after meeti…

i mean, texting daily lightly is definitely great for checking in with certain people. Like sending memes and reels and light conversations can help maintain a good relationship. Or even if that drops…

Thanks for the reply. No contact didn't last long. She pushed back hard and we ended up talking things out. She's trying to show me that someone in my life will fight for me for once. So I'm takin…

This was not my experience even when I was heavily DA. I think it could almost seem that way from the outside because it did take me a loooong time to warm up to people (still does! though not nearly …

Hey, thank you for your thoughtful response. I definitely don’t want to sink into victimhood or act like I don’t have any agency. I do have other friends as well, they are just newer friendships that,…

How common are these boundaires and are they a little strict or have I just been with very nonchalant men thus far? (Dating for a few months and we’re in our 30s) -doesn’t want me to get tipsy with g…

>no opposite sex 1-1 hangouts- I am ok with this and don’t want my partner hanging out w women 1-1 either excepting colleagues for a quick day time coffee or long standing platonic female friends if i…

> I don't understand why would you keep your exes as friends Did you ask her? Personally, I have a couple exes I'm friendly with as I like them as people, we share social circles and free time activi…

I lost a male friend in a similar fashion. His wife didn’t like him hanging out with me; we played video games together in person and she had an issue with it. So we fell out. It ruined me and still d…

Long tangent: I only recently started using this sub and I gotta say the first and foremost lesson is that I'm not as neurotic as I once thought, especially about texting lol.  I have to reign in my…

I assume you have a job. The first few job interviews you did were pretty awkward and it might have taken a while to get the hang of how they go, right? Dating isn't quite like a job interview, but …

Men coming out of the woodwork to try and connect. It's nice but I'm not feeling like dating them in particular. Was hanging out with one with a guy I used to see bartending and a guy I used to hook u…

We kept hanging out with my ex for a while as well. Just like before we started actually dating, just getting a coffee and chatting once or twice a week. It didn't work out romantically, but the conne…

I am married (no kids) but we are both very curious and active with many interests/hobbies and enjoy a LOT of time and space to do our own thing, travel independently, etc. We like spending time toge…

For me personally it's not enough to meet you for a couple of hours to figure out whether this will work long-term or not. My guiding principle when meeting new people is to keep hanging out with them…

You’re just incompatible with them. Often we are attracted to people with opposite attachment needs to us because we become that way (either finding love too much or too little) because of how our par…

Obviously everyone is different! My bf and I were already hanging out 2x/week for a few months before we started dating so it felt fine to start seeing each other 3x/week pretty quickly. And I'm prett…

If your partner has a wellrounded life and fulfilling hobbies, and your hobbies are only scrolling, shopping and hanging out with him, that's pathetic and embarrassing.

Interesting timing,I have gotten in conflict with my partner about this. We have been seeing each other for a year now. On most weekdays, because we live half an hour apart ,we chat on the phone al…

LITERALLY! Two guys asked for my instagram; one cancelled the date three hours beforehand and never followed up to reschedule, and the other just liked about 25 pictures and never planned a date even …

Asked a friend out recently, for whom I was developing a little crush. Gently rebuffed; "not looking to date right now but I like hanging out with you," which is not a hard no I guess, but still a no.…

Need advice. I've been casually hanging out with a girl both one-on-one and in group settings. We've done this a few times, and it's very friendly and we have a lot of fun, usually hanging out for hou…