solving

I didn't read through every last comment so it's possible somebody else already said this but, in addition to being more emotionally available, please make sure you aren't always focused on "fixing" o…

Freelancers – the only person that can evaluate your pricing is the buyer (not Reddit) — *(TL;DR at bottom)* Questions like this pop up on this subreddit every few weeks: > How much should I charge for a basic website? Or: > Is $500 for a single-page Figma design a good price? ...and…

Is there a UX role in existence that doesn't involve so much documentation? — So I come from a background in design. I was a bit of a generalist before—branding, logos, layouts, art direction—and while that was fun, it started to feel fragile. Like I was always one trend away f…

From Rejection to Redemption: How I Broke Into DevOps — Guys, I'm here sitting on my back yard on a beautiful Saturday and I am about to sign an offer letter with a Fortune 500 company — with a 25% salary increase. But just a few months ago, I was getting…

Restart Operator: Schedule K8s Workload Restarts — github: [https://github.com/archsyscall/restart-operator](https://github.com/archsyscall/restart-operator) Built a simple K8s operator that lets you schedule periodic restarts of Deployments, Statefu…

Does anyone here use Humanitec? Feedback wanted! — I’ve been looking into Humanitec and I’m curious to hear from people who are actually using it. * What use case(s) you’re solving with it? * How it's integrated into your workflows? * Any wins or cha…

How do you keep track of costs across your (AI+SaaS) stack (I will not promote) — We’ve been working on an AI product that touches a ton of different tools: OpenAI, Midjourney, Claude, ElevenLabs, Google Cloud, etc. Recently, we started noticing these random billing spikes, $300 h…

What is the biggest problem your startup is solving, where are you located, are you a solo founder and what is your biggest challenge these days? I will not promote. — Please don't promote your startup, just share your main focus, from where you operate even its a global product, if you are the only founder and most importantly what is the biggest challenge you are …

Spent 1 year solving a problem users “loved” but wouldn’t pay for: my learnings [I will not promote] — We are 2 years into building our SaaS, but spent 1 year building something people “loved”, “were excited about”... yet did not pay for. Since then, we have slightly pivoted and gained traction, but I …

I’m still a magnet to guys who need help. (I stopped rescuing). — I used to be more anxious-ambivalent/codependent and enmeshed from family + an ex-friend. I’ve learned in CBT to separate someone else’s problems/emotions and my own to not become codependent again. (…

My friend felt stuck for years - in session we found a core belief that life is only suffering — I did a quantum healing session for my friend Ramona and honestly what came up was intense. She has felt stuck for a long time. Putting things off, hard to get moving, hard to create, hard to do even…

My friend felt stuck for years - in session we found a core belief that life is only suffering — I did a quantum healing session for my friend Ramona and honestly what came up was intense. She has felt stuck for a long time. Putting things off, hard to get moving, hard to create, hard to do even…

Experienced ego dissolution and timelessness while a friend spiraled into a bad trip believing we were communicating through “waves” — I wanted to share a recent experience because the contrast between my trip and my friend’s bad trip was extremely interesting, and I’m curious if others have seen similar dynamics in group trips. We …

AM silent treatment is HELL — For context- two days ago AM asked me (19F) and my sister (17F) why our cousin and our close friends are scared or intimidated by her. We started making fun of her for the things she used to do or say…

Gateway tapes and life changes — I began the tapes around the end of December last year. I’ve spent a lot of time on each tape, sitting with them for a while so I can absorb as much as I can from each one. I’ve been alternating betwe…

You've Tried Manifesting Them Back Multiple Times - Here's Why It's Not Working — **"I've manifested my SP back multiple times but it never works. Now it just feels draining."** **You're not failing at manifestation.** **You're failing at creating coherent field states.** And th…

The entire universe is frequency and our communications depend on the resonance of our quantum fields — As many of you in this community know, the "UFO/NHI" phenomenon and spiritual awakening often converge at a single point: Resonance. For years, I’ve been obsessed with a question: Is there a specific …

Being forced to become smarter than them because they are dumb as hell — My Indian parents turned out be really really dumb. Their problem solving skill is terrible. My father is the worst, he is a utter brainlet. All he does is work all day. No socializing, no nothing. Ju…

The secret to manifestation — I posted here about a year ago about an experience I had with the I AM state. Since then, my life has changed completely. Manifestation became absolutely natural, to the point where it became a questi…

Are aliens helping us or hurting us? — For the past two or so years Ive been stuck in this very strange alien encounter where entities claiming to be aliens have taken over my mind, specifically my internal voice and imagination, but they …

Energy Exchange: How We Give, Take, and Protect Our Vital Force — Energy exchange is, essentially, communication. The energy a person generates is given outward. But, in accordance with the laws of conservation of energy, a person must receive energy from outside. …

Can deactivation be permanent? — I’m in a year and a half long relationship and recently deactivated hard after a disagreement we had. Up until that point I was really happy and found the relationship quite easy, we’d had a few minor…

30F My 30M keeps commenting on what I eat with a magnifying glass. How do I go about telling him how this makes me feel? — My SO and I have been married for almost 5 months. He had made some weight based comments in the past that were extremely hurtful, we talked about it and he said he would stop. For context, I have aut…

My issue with focus 12 problem solving — Just did focus 12 problem solving and it said "tell your concsious the problem, ask fkr the solution" And me I started to get confused or doubtful and was like "bro if I dont know then why would my …

The most serious use of lucid dreaming that nobody talks about: training to die — Most people start practicing lucid dreaming to fly, explore, have experiences physics won't allow. I did too. But I've come to think that's the most superficial application of the practice, and ther…

Unexpected benefit of keeping a dream journal — I've noticed a specific reason that recording your dreams helps you become lucid. When you record your dreams, it solidifies those memories for a lot longer. You start to build up a collection of dre…

So, I've hit my personal record streak without alcohol; it is 160 days now! — I've finally gotten to the point where my current sober streak is longer than my previous all-time record (159 days). I'm incredibly happy and proud that I made it here. There are no downsides to sobr…

Shifting the seat of consciousness from head to chest, have you tried it? — Hi everyone, I've been practicing meditation for a few years and I recently stumbled upon something interesting after trying astral projection. By default, the place where I usually perceive “mys…

Why does my relationship turn into a breakup every time we fight? — So I (24F) have been dating my boyfriend (26M) for about 4 months now. We met on Bumble, and honestly… I really do love him. He’s kind, thoughtful, and overall a really good person. But there’s this …

Why you feel drained. — \# emotions For the longest time, I couldn't figure out why I was so exhausted. I’d finish a day where I technically didn't "do" much—no big projects, no heavy lifting—but I felt like I’d been in a f…

Do discrete developmental stage models cause harm when clients internalize the stages as self-judgment? — If you use a stage-based developmental framework in clinical work (Kegan, Loevinger, Cook-Greuter), have you seen clients weaponize the stages against themselves? A client who believes they should be …

Can someone find jobs that suit them well based on their astrology? — I’m sure it’s not a totality- it’s not like all actors are (insert random sign here), but I can’t help but wonder if there is something to “this sign is all about problem solving and helping others” a…

Breakup with fearful avoidant — So I just want to tell my story of how the breakup is and how I assume that the person who broke up with me is fearful avoidant after analysing what happened and what was going on. I want to get some …

Fuck my family , fuck asian culture , fuck this country, fuck everything. — Im Korean 20 years old and I hate this fucking country and values. People are all savages who live off material goods and see NPCs as stupid robots, functions that should work and do nothing else in …

Struggling with comparison and self-worth in a new relationship (35M) — 35M here. Recently got back into dating after a long gap (UPSC prep, divorce, career reset). I’m currently rebuilding my career: underpaid relative to my potential but steadily improving (atleast I th…

The "other" is just vibration & how to use non-resistance for stable contact and AP — The boundary between "self" and "other" often dissolves in the presence of pure vibration. In the realm of the experiencer, where phenomena challenge our linear narratives of order, the distinction be…

​Sense of "dissolving" into the world and reality solidifying when I focus. What is this? — I am using a translation tool to write this post, so I apologize for any unnatural phrasing. ​I have two specific experiences I'd like to ask about: ​Merging with the world: During meditation, I oft…

is it possible to manifest my vision problems away?? — asking because ive been trying for months on end and nothing has improved 😢 im wondering if im doing it wrong?? any help is appreciated \^\^ ive been trying to see if i could manifest my corneas be…

Are we addicted to blaming each other? — Hey everyone, I’m trying to understand a pattern in my relationship(of three years) that’s starting to feel like a loop we can’t break. Basically, my girlfriend(F20)and I(M19) keep falling into this …

How can I work toward something without feeling bad about it? — I’ve been struggling with something and I’m not sure how to deal with it. Recently, I might have an opportunity to do some freelance video editing as extra income. I’m also starting a regular job nex…

AI is your friend. — I am an expat in a foreign land, and fell in love with a delightful woman here. The first month was glorious and beautiful, but soon after she began exhibiting many of these traits (before I even knew…

Should I do therapy? — So, I don't have any major trauma or anything (I think), basically I don't have any major problems in my life. My family is well, we are financially stable, my parents are hella chill, I have a friend…

does anyone else feel like they have a way of existing and can’t go out of it? — i’m 16 and 6 years passed from my trauma, i don’t have certificates that proves exactly that i have a trauma/c-ptsd but i have all the symptoms, i am going crazy cs just now i’ve realised how many tim…

Has anyone's parents oscillated between expecting different levels of performance/standards of studying/working/"adulting"? — My complaint may not be uniquely induced by narcissistic parents, but I'm going to type anyways. I notice that my parents sometimes don't trust me to do things, even relatively simple things. For inst…

I’m re-explaining my situation after everyone on this subreddit said I was the shittiest person alive — Hi everyone I know this is super long but please read all of it. So yesterday I posted this: “I need honest opinions because I’m really conflicted and don’t know if I crossed a line or if this break…

F22 M 23 boyfriend never initiates conversations after arguments and I feel so lonely. How do I get him to help me in this relationship? — F22 and my bf M23 have been dating for 2 years (known for 3). This is a long one please bear with me. Throughout the whole relationship every major argument leads to the same result. I become at fau…

has anyone with anxious attachment been the dumper? — i have, i was never her priority and i gave absolutely everything for her, rearranging my schedule, flying to her country every time, resolving arguments, sending messages of love, being spontaneous. …

How to steer a trip to have fun? — So basically whenever I tripped my intention has always been healing from trauma, solving personal moral issues, gaining a deeper understanding of who I am, what I stand for,... And all of them have s…

Is no contact really the right thing if you still want them back? — I know no contact isn’t supposed to be about getting your ex back. I know it’s meant to help you heal and focus on yourself… but does it still leave a chance for things to work again? It’s been about …

Nightmares during problem solving exercise — I just redid wave 2 tape 2 and had a really freaky experience While doing the tape I was slipping in and out of nightmares, but it felt more like daydreaming where I’m just picturing something while …

I stayed with a miserable guy due to my empathy. — /this is very long. To get everything straight, I had met a boy online last years November. we thought the same, matched personalities, all of that fun stuff. BTW: To anybody else reading this😭, I…

>minimizing how much anger I feel over the betrayal Perhaps this minimization is a form of self defence. I also feel the same way. We are still living together and I don't want that to be stressful. …

I think all these time‐tracking systems in IT are absolutely useless and only justify the work of those who implement them. No offense to efficient managers. If the company were like a factory produc…

Focus on showcasing your cloud support experience and how it relates to DevOps principles. Your background gives you a solid foundation in understanding cloud infrastructure, troubleshooting, and work…

You don’t have to be great at the thing, just good at solving the problem and finding the right people. Most people start with what they can do themselves, hustle hard, then hire once money’s coming …

Clearly identifying a problem and solving it easily with your knowledge + Problem facing business owners with limited bandwidth = Recipe for success

I'm a neuroscientist and I know a conditioned puppy when I see one. I will continue to meet what I sense being 110% wrapped up in classical conditioning and subjective emotions with 110% mental clar…

i’m in the same boat right now. I dated a girl a girl for two years who dumped me and has never spoken to me again since that day. it has been about a year since our breakup, but I keep obsessing. m…

I think that no one can get healed overnight and pushing oneself to be affectionate would only create resentment long term. I think it's better to ask space and explain the attachment pattern, and the…

I think that’s totally possible. Emotional blunting or solving your depression by making you just not really care about most things is how some antidepressants work. And seeming indifferent over your …

I'm AP, there is something which helps me detaching (it might be unhealthy though) I basically try to think how wrong other person did to me. Objectively speaking, your friend is at fault here. Confl…

Boring because of not wanting to share his feelings and trying to not get deeper into any discussion beyond the shallow level because he thought disagreements lead to conflicts and conflicts are bad. …

For me, I found using the butterfly hug has helped a lot and breathing techniques when am emotionally disregulated, that and visualization. Seeing all these voices of concerns and loud noises as leave…

Thank you. I mentioned to other reply, yeah I have some childhood abandonment hitting me too. Never realized til REALLY recently. IDK I do NOT feel mature & controlled, at all. I mean I know I am tr…

Text of original post by u/VisibleAnteater1359: I used to be more anxious-ambivalent/codependent and enmeshed from family + an ex-friend. I’ve learned in CBT to separate someone else’s problems/emotio…

You should check out the book Nonviolent Communication!! There are free PDFs online if you want to try before you buy. I'm moving from AA -> Secure and it has been super helpful. The basic idea is: …

\- You can absolutely fully break down in front of someone. Yes, people are fully breaking down in front of the people close to them - just not, like, all the time. Most people cry a little bit regula…

Come in with no or low expectations. When i go to similar types of events, i just aim to have good conversations, maybe learn something new, and experience the moment of being social. if you're proble…

Holy shit! This post definitely resonates with me! I just learned today that I dissociate, particularly derealization, where my surroundings don't seem real, like I'm in a dream. I wonder if your link…

Being single into my thirties is legitimately a "thing." I don't feel like it's degrading my self worth, but it really is majorly impacting my next steps in life (career, home purchasing, family build…

I’m wishing you the best of luck and good luck solving the problem. Whenever I see this issue, I always advise popping over to the /r/deadbedroom subreddit. Def not trying to be doom and gloom but thi…

Ah, I see the "difficulty finding someone with an equally active lifestyle" a lot. I could see how that's difficult. I think a lot of people like to slow-down heading into middle-age, so it's tough. …

Then you need to do something about that because it’s clearly fucking with your life. Maybe it’s time to try a therapist. And I hate to say this because a lot of people seem to think a therapist is th…

Great question! Firstly, I recommend listening to Michael Greenberg's podcast. Episode 252. Secondly, ask yourself, has rumination ever improved your relationships? And/or led to reconciliation w w…

I'm fearful avoidant and my partner is an anxious attacher. We care deeply about each other, but our emotional problem solving tactics are often at odds with each other. We have been in couples therap…

I think an important thing about deciding whether or not to speak up about your feelings, is deciding what outcome you would like. As a DA you are probably telling yourself a story along the lines of,…

> After all, what could be bad about being non emotional during conflict? You're probably aware now, but I used to think that too, and I now understand emotions are critical to resolving conflict. Se…

It’s difficult. I’ll just say that. The gender roles where I am are very strong. Clear roles and expectations. One thing that doesn’t help is communication. Where I’m from there is direct communicat…

Lots of venting (as I started writing this I just spiralled into journaling I guess) I am only venting as obviously I am doing things wrong. On Sunday, the guy I was / am seeing and I had a call for…

i'm not trying to sound like a bitch but i really read this post thinking it was a young 20 something year old. just the subject line alone. more just people in general but i dont understand why bein…

I think so. I am having trouble remembering them but they seem almost entirely just my unconscious mind solving things for my waking mind. The difference between awake and asleep is so much narrower.

nah man the "grass is greener" thing cuts both ways. if you're only going back because dating sucks doesn't mean things are actually better with them now. you're just settling out of exhaustion which …

A few of thoughts First, the original Stoics were writing and debating their theories over 2,000 years ago. Due to the vagueries of translation and the vastness of time between them and us, there are…

The layering you are describing is real and this eclipse was a big one for exactly the reasons you named. A total lunar eclipse in Virgo opposing a Pisces Sun, while Saturn and Neptune are conjunct at…

stop focusing on him. that was your problem from the start. focus on yourself and solving your own problems and improving your own life. stalking him and his wife is just giving him more power over yo…

Yes. Currently dissolving the roots of the human identity altogether. My vision is to completely free up the dreaming mechanism and use it as a kind of lucid "reality" that can switch planes and scena…

This is interesting to me because I have been working for some time on a structural model that actually uses very similar imagery of a wheel. When I read this account, what the person describes did no…

It is a real pain in the ass to have that persecutor on you all the time. The name for it is “introject”. Once you get that, and you start walking into the direction of dissolving it, things can tu…

Couldn’t read the whole post - feels like someone is talking about me. Top it up with some ADHD obsession for problem solving and you got your narc self a perpetual butler. Never again (I sincerely …

Yeah, in general, it isn't always your job to make sure that your partner is happy. Relationship issue solving is about negotiation, but sometimes you can go, "well, I want to do this", and he goes "I…

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Your Dad is confusing on purpose. He is nice, and then mean, and then nice again to keep you off balance. It is a control mechanism that makes you want to perpe…

I think people are all different and timing is different as well. You can’t just say one thing will work, when with another person it would not work at all. It’s more about our own story, the process…

Oh man, the blinding thing is so real. Mine is excitement. The second I realize I'm dreaming, I get this rush of "holy crap this is actually happening" and it destabilizes everything within like 10 se…

This happened in my marriage of 30 years as well. I was the one doing the initiating and rarely, if ever did she initiate any intamacy. The marriage spiraled downhill. We certainly talked a lot about …

When my boyfriend of 4 years (at the time) started feeling the way your husband has been feeling, he did something crazy. He *communicated* with me. He asked me to have a discussion with him about so…

This resonates with me so much, thank you. I do feel everything I ever thought I wanted from life is dissolving, all my goals, my ambitions, my desires. I’m learning that perhaps I don’t in fact want …

Yes, thank you! I feel like a lot of comments are missing this. Yes, he may be feeling undesired because he was always the one to initiate sex, but he didn't communicate that with her. Instead, he de…

"At first, he was obsessed with me. He talked constantly about our future marriage, moving in together, and kids. He introduced me to his family, his friends, and even his coworkers. Everyone told me …

(Disclaimer: brains are very complex and very weird and this is very reductive) As a human, your brain has problem solving functions and "how to stay alive" functions. The "how to stay alive" functio…

I was told that is called "tool" mind, as that part of our mind is a tool to help us live life by solving problems, planning your dinner, etc. It always appears for me, but it will settle down with mo…

The 0° Aries point is significant — it's the very first degree of the entire zodiac. A new beginning at the most fundamental level. Saturn (structure, rules, authority) merging with Neptune (illusion…