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Citations (100)
Welcome! Read Me First. — # Welcome to r/Stoicism. This community exists for serious discussion of Stoic philosophy. It is not a forum for general self-help, motivation, validation, or professional therapy. It is also not a p…
Start Here: Essential Resources & FAQs — The idea for this post came up in [this thread](https://www.reddit.com/r/Wordpress/comments/1cpme25/mods_can_this_subreddit_implement_a_minimum_karma/) by wiz to avoid the number of similar questions …
The market is bad but employers really shouldn't do this — Within 6 months of time frame I've experienced: - An employer who preferred to go for an offshore option for cheaper salary after showering me with compliments. - An employer that had 6 stage interv…
[Hiring/Seeking/Offering] Jobs / Co-Founders Weekly Thread — # [Hiring/Seeking/Offering] Jobs / Co-Founders Weekly Thread This is an experiment. We see there is a demand from the community to: * Find Co-Founders * Hiring / Seeking Jobs * Offering Your Skillse…
Stategies for scaling out MySQL/MariaDB when database gets too large for a single host? — What are your preferred strategies when a MySQL/MariaDB database server grows to have too much traffic for a single host to handle, i.e. scaling CPU/RAM or using regular replication is not an option a…
Plugin for editor, designer bylines? — Hello. Does anyone know of a WordPress plugin that would let me add bylines for the designer and editor of a blog post (not just the author)? UPDATE #2: Ended up paying for PublishPress (suggesed by …
In Search Of Business Owners Importing via Ocean Freight — Hey e-commerce business owners! I'm conducting research on shipping and logistics processes for businesses importing products from China through ocean freight. I'd love to chat with you for just 20 m…
What would you do? CEO wants me to become the company’s front-end dev. — I am the sole product designer for a corporation which includes 5 companies and 2 CRMs. I just had my first yearly review - glowing feedback, nothing but exceeded expectations. And then it happened… m…
feeling numb in dating but longing for intimacy — For the past few years, I've been mostly numb in dating. I don’t really feel anything romantic. I don’t feel sparks. I don’t feel excited about anyone or attached. I don’t miss people when I’m not wit…
Specific Person (SP) Manifestation: No Magic, No Supernatural Forces. Just Proven Science — Hi everyone, It’s been a long time since I last posted, and honestly it was overdue. I keep seeing the same recycled LOA bullshit everywhere. Endless manifestation porn, more unqualified people calli…
My sun and rising are in Sagittarius. Why am I so shy and reluctant to express myself? — Based on my limited understanding, having your sun and rising in Sagittarius signifies being outgoing, expressive, and freedom seeking. I couldn’t be further from that. I know other aspects in my char…
Where can I find therapy for my paraphilias. — I (19m) have been struggling with the attraction to minors due to a lot of incidents that happened when I was younger which I will not get into, but I really want to get help. I dont have much money, …
Make the world convenient for you — So I move in about 3 months from now and decided that I wanted to search for an apartment pretty early on so that I could take my time and really find nice options. One of my previous beliefs was tha…
Wife (26F) scheduled cosmetic procedures we agreed we wouldn’t do before marriage, using money from our joint account. I’m (28M) struggling with the trust breach. — I’m 28 and my wife is 26. We’ve been married for 4 years and we have a 1-year-old child together. Before we got married, we had a lot of conversations about values and expectations for the future. On…
I was the husband who didn't do enough. Sharing my perspective — It wasn’t a single explosion but a slow grind between two people who couldn’t agree on what a "good life" looked like. For a long time, I was admittedly the husband who didn’t pull his weight, a chara…
My (M19) Gf (F19) constantly asks for details on me being raped because she "can't wrap her head around it", is this worth it? — Me and my gf (both 19) have been dating for 2 years. 4 or 5 months before we started I was raped by an older woman. She tried to play being my friend and it just happened. I have never told anyone ab…
I (34m) have been with my partner (34f) for 8 years. I have supported us financially for 8 years but want her to contribute and I'm made to feel like the bad guy — She had just quit her job when we met and dated for a few months before she moved in and I agreed to support us until she was able to find work. She has had a part time job here and there over the yea…
Important research statistics on contact experiences — Many people aren’t aware of the research that has been done on contact experiences. People often seem at least somewhat familiar with a few of the big names from early on (Budd Hopkins, John E. Mack, …
At the start of 2026 I left my soulmate after three years together, I'm 36 now and whilst I desperately miss her, I realise I'm finished/done with relationships. — The dust has settled now. I'm not reacting out of impulse. I'm never going to find a connection like this again. I've had two other long term relationships and a few causals... We met on Christmas Ev…
I'm already behind in life at 18 — I wasn't sure which flair to use, because I think I need advice on a lot of things. I also want to preface by saying I do not blame any of this on my parents, schools, mental health, etc, and this was…
How to/ should I make peace with having a mother who appears to care but doesn’t want to spend time with me — In some ways I wonder whether my situation actually constitutes an emotionally neglectful one, or at the very least on the milder end of the spectrum. I’m a grown woman who lives with my parents due …
I don’t really like my therapist. (Rant) — Hello, I’m making this post to mainly rant and ask for a bit of advice. To start off, I don’t really like my therapist because she talks about herself kind of a lot. Of course if it was once in a whi…
Breakup with fearful avoidant — So I just want to tell my story of how the breakup is and how I assume that the person who broke up with me is fearful avoidant after analysing what happened and what was going on. I want to get some …
I [28M] am afraid woman I'm dating [26F] is about to back out of relationship after reluctantly agreeing to exclusivity. — Me \[28M\] and Lea \[26F\] have been seeing each other for exactly 3 months now. We met through hinge back in the first week of January and had an explosive first date which ended in us sleeping toget…
Bless Another—Bless Yourself — Hi everyone, So today I'd like to talk about a nice situation I manifested for someone else. **Context** For a long time, my mom's husband has tried to build his own business and also to purchase o…
I feel uncomfy that my emotional outlet is chat gpt — (Anyone wanting the gist before reading) TLDR: went to college, have no structure, self destruct, want to get better, idk how honestly. Going to therapy but idk seems pointless, start talking to chat …
burned out pursuer (?) leaving after exit affair(?) — My ex-girlfriend and I broke up the day before yesterday. After living together for a year, she's anxiously attached and said she's lost her feelings, that "there's no love there anymore." She's so un…
How do I convince my parents to knock and enter, or let me lock the door? — I am 18F, Indian, living with my parents and younger sis. In our house, there are only 2 bedrooms which are shared between all 4 us, so no one has their own room. My parents have always been adamant o…
My boyfriend (21M) and I (21F) never engage in foreplay (handjob/fingering/head) What can I do? — Okay, so.. my boyfriend (21M) and I (21F) have been together for over a year and a half now. He was my first for pretty much everything, and has sort of taught me all I know about sex and intimacy. Ou…
Should I break no contact with my ex? — Okay guys, here's what happened: I was in a relationship for two years and seven months. The relationship was already deteriorating due to problems and fights from both of us, clearly because of bad t…
What are your best tips to create a safe relationship? — I recently left a long term relationship, and have been touching base with old friends. Let's call this particular friend Egg. In the past we had a fairly long term and comfortable fwb situation, but …
I’m re-explaining my situation after everyone on this subreddit said I was the shittiest person alive — Hi everyone I know this is super long but please read all of it. So yesterday I posted this: “I need honest opinions because I’m really conflicted and don’t know if I crossed a line or if this break…
I (25F) got into an argument with my boyfriend (26M) over a vibrator. How can I get over this? — (Throw away account as he knows my reddit page) We’ve been together for 2 years and have a generally healthy sex life. Recently, I was reading discussions on my period tracking app about using vibrat…
Group Dynamics and friendships — Does anyone else struggle with group dynamics? I've always preferred one on one, in my mind they are closer feeling friendships. I struggle alot to navigate group dynamics because it just naturally f…
3 Month Mark - First salvo fired. — So, at the beginning of the year, my wife told me she was seeking a separation/divorce. (You can read my previous post on the matter if you like.) Despite making some significant changes to myself …
Was this just an individual personality difference?(26M) — Hi, I’m Korean, and about a year ago I had a short relationship with someone from Kazakhstan. She was ethnically Russian, born to Russian parents, and grew up in Kazakhstan. She came to Korea for her …
Thinking about switching from loa to loa? — Hi, building a private Law of Assumption group. Not beginner-friendly. Not for dabblers. Requirements: • you actually practice • you’re consistent (or ready to be) • you know your birth time • Human …
group chat — hi, building a private manifesting/ Law of Assumption group. Not beginner-friendly. Not for dabblers. All spiritualist welcome! Requirements: • you actually practice • you’re consistent (or ready to …
Intense trauma externalisation integration experiences? Gestalt chairs — I have started with gestalt so it is still my preferred trauma coping tool subset, it's pretty aligned with how I feel and with ig how I work in general. I have been going to psychodrama workshops und…
Stuck on Abusive relationship — Hello there. Firstly, let me start with this: I know I acted terribly and was not a good person in this situation. This is genuinely the worst thing I've ever done, and I suffer for it every day. I do…
Toxic relationship — Hello there. Firstly, let me start with this: I know I acted terribly and was not a good person in this situation. This is genuinely the worst thing I've ever done, and I suffer for it every day. I do…
Struggling to Start Therapy Because I’m Embarrassed About the Age Dynamic. — I’ve never been to therapy before, and I’m finally at the point where I know I need to start. But, amongst other deterrents, I keep getting stuck on something... I’m in my late 20s, and for some reas…
Why did my ex cheat on me with girls who look nothing like me? — I’m just really curious. For context, I don’t get insecure with girls at all cause I can confidently say I am physically attractive myself. I have a pretty face, big ass and boobs, hourglass body, 5’3…
Despite everything, it hurts that my dad dislikes me — I (26F) only have my mum and my brother left. Well, i have a huge family with aunts and uncles, but never really had any contact with them. My dad never really liked me growing up. He always preferre…
Small wins — My mom’s preferred enmeshment tactic is health anxiety. She is incredibly health-conscious, and I have inherited that. It started when we went out once, and we saw a woman unconscious lying on the g…
Proposed but we broke up. Mentally stuck. Should I apologize? — I’m a 29M who met a 27F long-distance through social media. We’d followed each other for years on X and Instagram but barely interacted until I commented on one of her posts, and then last October thi…
Stuck between choosing myself and keeping others happy. How do I deal with the guilt? — I used to believe that my happiness lied in the happiness of those around me. I spent years making sure everyone else was okay, thinking their smiles would fulfill me. But over time, I realized that …
I had zero privacy or control of my bedroom growing up and that has left me with deep fear of my pirvacy being invaded — My parents are very old school, conservative Christians. Growing up, I wasn’t allowed to have social media accounts like MySpace or Facebook unless they had full access to them, including my passwords…
boyfriend (M31) canceled my (F26) birthday dinner reservation because of ongoing car issues — Yesterday was my birthday. I (F26) met with a friend for coffee in the morning, visited my dad and brother in the afternoon, and had plans to meet my boyfriend (M31) later in the evening for a fancy, …
silent break up — I was in a relationship for 1.5 years. For the first year, he was the 'perfect' boyfriend in every way—attentive and loyal, though a bit emotionally reserved. Suddenly, he told me he needed space to …
I used to teach yoga. I used red and green chips/cards for students to signal whether/not they preferred hands on assist for poses. I joke with my DA partner we should start using these for ourselves.…
>One FA said something to me about herself early on, in some conversation or another, that seemed innocent at the time because I was infatuated: "That doesn't make you want to run?" My preferred resp…
I have been seeing this guy for 3 months and things have been wonderful. We’ve both shared that this is serious for us and we see this becoming a long-term commitment. Last weekend (before Thanksgivin…
Ok I've created a form, with an option to reply for preferred times. Though it may even be worth creating a third call for Australia/NZ time zones? As that could be quite a squeeze for you getting up …
Avoidance gets worse as time passes hence if they were to meet with you, they'd do it at the beginning and then pull away as you grew closer. If they're content with how things are right now it means …
So I’m not poly but I am ENM (sexually but not emotionally open relationships are my preferred model) and do get where you’re coming from, but even then, if a partner isn’t able to meet your basic emo…
There is no direct correlation between low cognitive empathy and anxious attachment. I could not find a study that explicitly drew that conclusion. Studies do report that securely attached people show…
That meta analysis addresses empathy in general. As stated by them >We did not differentiate the dimension of the empathy; both cognitive and emotional dimensions were included as a general measure o…
Aww, boo. Someone got sick so I had to cancel my murder mystery dinner party that's tomorrow since the game requires that all people are present. And that someone is -her-. And while I don't mind a c…
I preferred minimal texting before the first date, and I would text a bit more often after that if we have a second date planned. I'm a pretty consistent and frequent texter and prefer the same. I don…
My take was that if you're getting a dearth of likes, opening up the dealbreakers makes you more popular, which then will make the app think you're more popular, which then will increase their likelih…
❤️ I'm 34... I started getting a little nervous around 30. I feel like I'm out of the "omg calm down" range into the "yeah, you're right, this is cutting it a little close and definitely not the timel…
Not meaning to be difficult but it's hard to give advice because mine was very personalized to me, which I would encourage you to do the same. Make it as you as possible, especially the "weird" aspec…
If you feel like you have to sacrifice parts of yourself to "be safe" around someone, you are not actually safe with them regardless. You're just choosing an alternate version of unsafe. As an adult, …
So I recently learned that everyone has their own love language. There are 5 and it sounds like you two are the spending time together one. In order for any person to be fulfilled in any relationship …
For me, I like plans. A date on the calendar with in a day or two is preferred - but it’s okay to me if the date is a few weeks out.
I've always enjoyed being a bit of a loner as a child, coming from a big family. I absolutely love being in relationships but I also thrive when single. I've lived with boyfriends in the past, but po…
I feel like I'm stuck in a paradox. On one hand, I totally agree with you. On the other, I worry that romantic partners may not necessarily translate into compatible housemates, and that sounds like t…
Setting aside the possibility that you don't genuinely want to continue a relationship with this person (if this is the case then you might consider either a respectful and clear statement of departur…
No that's not what I said and it's quite a misinterpretation of the situation. I said I had a minor miscommunication with my partner, I did NOT say I was about to end it, you just added that assumptio…
Interesting, coffee dates are most preferred for me. I meet all my dates from singles events or randomly outside since I don't do OLD. I put more effort into finding either small chains or mom-and-pop…
I used to work abroad with this woman who would always say how much she preferred the country she had lived in before. Someone I knew also knew her there and said she used to complain a lot about it w…
I don’t think they’re seeking out liberal women - this is basically a statistics question. I only date conservative leaning men and they’ve generally preferred to date conservative women (especially t…
1. State your rising sign (this is important). Capricorn rising 2. State the sign and degree of your natal Saturn (we much prefer you use the Whole Sign house system, but if you use Placidus, the …
This may sound weird, but does anyone else find that their poor time management skills makes dating super stressful. So, I’m well aware that many tasks take me longer than the average person, so I t…
Three methods I know to work besides therapy(seriously). The first is exposure therapy via asking strangers for the time. Just the time. Take your watch off and hide your phone. "Um...could I get th…
I (21F) feel very jealous and am worried about making him (22M) feel smothered. For context, this is my first real relationship, nobody ever asked me out or anything growing up. Me and my boyfriend h…
I vastly preferred Bumble but I think it depends on your type. I found people were more similar to me on Bumble.
Lmao one of my hinge prompts at some point was something like “all I ask is that… you don’t judge me when I try to parallel park 4 times then just give up instead”. It was mostly silly and gave guys a…
If you refuse to read the guidelines and ask something general like 'what does this mean' etc you will be handed a mute. Guidelines which will help in getting the right answers: * G1: Please state a v…
If you refuse to read the guidelines and ask something general like 'what does this mean' etc you will be handed a mute. Guidelines which will help in getting the right answers: * G1: Please state a v…
If you refuse to read the guidelines and ask something general like 'what does this mean' etc you will be handed a mute. Guidelines which will help in getting the right answers: * G1: Please state a v…
If you refuse to read the guidelines and ask something general like 'what does this mean' etc you will be handed a mute. Guidelines which will help in getting the right answers: * G1: Please state a v…
most of the time, we like people who reflect traits of ourselves that we downplay. we LIKE to define ourselves within limited definitions, like "i am angry person" or "i am a math person, not an engli…
same for my ex man… it’s a different type of hurt. i guess it’s more linked to insecurity, you know? like the human fear of not being able to get somebody like that again, someone who specifically fit…
My mother would always give me clothes that were terrible colors on me. Mustard yellow, orange, orangey reds, light pastels, chartreuse green, all shades of brown. I looked better in (and preferred) d…
If you refuse to read the guidelines and ask something general like 'what does this mean' etc you will be handed a mute. Guidelines which will help in getting the right answers: * G1: Please state a v…
I'm gonna say it's the 12th house ruled by scorpio that is the overwhelming energy. Even more so if you felt that your family preferred your more "outgoing" sister. I don't believe there are such thin…
I would look at that t-square, with Saturn opposite Mars, both of them squaring Jupiter. Mars in Virgo can be shy and never feel quite ready, Saturn opposing can feel restrictive to that Mars express…
Not ugly clothes. Nice, expensive clothes that I wanted to wear but were always several sizes too small to encourage me to lose weight. Even though I was 5’9 and athletic. She’d buy me smalls when I w…
I just have a minor complaint to bitch about. My boyfriend is planning on moving into my house in a couple months, things are going great!!! He’s calm and sweet and kind and patient and steady and goo…
If you refuse to read the guidelines and ask something general like 'what does this mean' etc you will be handed a mute. Guidelines which will help in getting the right answers: * G1: Please state a v…
Yep I've been enduring a couple of years now of disgusting behaviour, which they have deemed necessary due to my non-compliance, and which has had an incredibly huge impact on me mentally and emotiona…
Another possibility depending on her personality is that she’s extending what she would want which is to make sure you still feel like you’re getting to experience their daily life. I don’t know your …
All you have to do is filter out your desired age range. With no filters, I had messages from 25-75. With filters, I easily date men in my preferred age range of +/-5 years.
Please watch out and prepare yourself for all the ways he can slack and then claim it’s somehow your fault. For example, watch for him to not want to make dinner together on YOUR schedule, but fail …
It doesn't matter what you look like, 20-year-olds like everyone It seems. I was on Hinge and set my age preferences to stop getting likes from people outside my preferred age range.
If you refuse to read the guidelines and ask something general like 'what does this mean' etc you will be handed a mute. Guidelines which will help in getting the right answers: * G1: Please state a v…
If you refuse to read the guidelines and ask something general like 'what does this mean' etc you will be handed a mute. Guidelines which will help in getting the right answers: * G1: Please state a v…
Same. I was with my SO for nearly 20 years before he died. We had a ceremony but weren’t legally married. While we were best friends, and I enjoyed the family get togethers we hosted and the happy …