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You need to learn how to read. I said 'IF". I said "If OP were to give in."
Reading interest in text — I am looking for some feedback or insight. I’m 49m and she is 50f. I met her on a dating app. It was great energy and really engaging. We went on a great date and she was very complementary and we di…
How to Wreck Your Career: a cautionary tale from someone who has 5 years of experience.. — Context:- I am a 31 year old UX designer with a masters degree in industrial design from one of the top design schools here in India. I have almost 6 years of experience on the paper of which I hav…
Interview for the same company from 2 recruiters (UK) — Hey, I'm in a bit of an awkward position and could do with some advice. I had a recruiter reach out to me last week about a role that was coming up. I said they could send my CV over. On Friday a di…
It’s frustrating how often I run into women with Avoidant tendencies. — I’m at a point where I just end things early if I see too many Avoidant tendencies early, but it seems like women with Avoidant tendencies are drown to me more often than secure or anxious which I’d r…
how to deal with an avoidant's freeze response in hard times? — my partner is FA, I've known him for a long time. He has made a lot of effort and has changed for the better. He's the more secure one between the two of us honestly, and he's pretty good at fighting …
my(F28) bf(M30) thinks themed bridal shower of my friend is stupid and my costume is stupid. — I (F28) am a teacher and my boyfriend(M30) works for a company. we have been together for 4 years and are highly compatible. He has always been reserved and quiet and introvert by nature. i'm more of …
My boyfriend and I had an argument over his marriage demands, and now he claims he means none of it... — Tl:dr: My boyfriend of two years has a list of requirements from me after we get married, and after our argument over it, which lead us to break up-- he said he didn't mean any of it and wants to go …
Reflection on over friendly therapist? — Hi readers. This is something that has been on my mind for months and I don't know how to wrap my head around it. Some professional insight might be helpful. I left therapy a few months ago. I had …
Broke up with DA after a year. — Met her a year ago, almost to the day. Things started well, relatively slowly which was nice for a change compared to other situations I have been in around that time. After two months, we became offi…
UPDATE: My (32f) fiancé (28m) repeatedly does not clean the house — Hello lovely reddit. First relevant links. My first post I deleted (so you can peruse the comments if you are interested): [https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/18yjl0g/my\_32f\_fianc%C3%…
My (19f) boyfriend (19m) keeps telling me I’m at high risk of diabetes. How do I address this? — I am a 19 year old woman. I am 5 foot 9 inches tall (177cm), my body weight is 67kg, my BMI is 21.4, body fat percentage is 15.8%, and body fat mass 10.6kg. I go to the gym 5 days a week and perform c…
How do I control my anger and my lack of patience in my relationship? — I’ve been with my husband going on a year and a half. He’s a wonderful man and our relationship is overall healthy. But I fear I am becoming emotionally abusive towards him. I’ve been in bad relations…
EMDR therapy fail — Today I was so excited to start EMDR. Before booking treatment, I told the therapist that I need help with sexual dysfunction resulting from child abuse and multiple SA’s as a young adult. She said 95…
Sunken Cost Fallacy — Married for almost 27 years. Got married at the ripe age of 19. Funny thing, I thought it was a mistake on my wedding night when he got out of bed to jack off because I was so exhausted from the long …
Discard/sudden breakup?! — Three months ago months ago I met a woman and had an intense, genuine connection. In under 8 weeks we spent 18-20 days together. She said she cared about me first, unprompted. We made future plans tog…
I (32F) trusted my partner (34M) completely until I discovered he lied about a “friend” he talks to daily and that they were texting very appropriate. I’m shaking and feeling lost — I’m a 32F and my partner is 34M. We’ve known each other for many years and have a long history together. We were apart for a while in the past but recently decided to try again because we both felt th…
I persisted when the 3D showed me the opposite and got my SP — So for context Sp and I have been in an on and off situation-ship for a year now due to my wavering self concept. (That is the old story I am no longer identifying with) anywho. My self concept real…
If your ex blindsided you, no contact probably will make them come back. — This is long- but I hope someone in NC with their ex in hopes they’ll return will read this because this is reality. I had an ex I loved so so much. We were together for 6 years, from when I was a t…
I made my husband confess to OBS and here’s what happened — For your education and entertainment purposes, this is the story of what happened when I forced my husband to confess to OBS. Quick backstory: (you can read the full post on my profile) my husband h…
Another revisionist success — This morning I had a little banter with this person who's really close to me. Things got a little heated up and he straight up said our friendship is over. I was very surprised as this was so out of c…
How do I (39F) forgive my husband (39M) for making a fake vet appt for our senior dog? — My husband and I have been together for 10 years, married for 4, and have 2 kids with another on the way. We have also been best friends since we were in middle school up until we started dating. A …
I (34m) have been with my partner (34f) for 8 years. I have supported us financially for 8 years but want her to contribute and I'm made to feel like the bad guy — She had just quit her job when we met and dated for a few months before she moved in and I agreed to support us until she was able to find work. She has had a part time job here and there over the yea…
Revision can alter physical incidents — It hasn't been long since I truly started grasping how magical revision is, and I just remembered an incident that happened a few months back last year that actually made the concept of revision sink …
Processing my NDE and the paranormal experiences that followed — I can’t sleep and i’m feeling the need to document a sequence of experiences I had from February 2019 through 2020 that forever changed my life. I’ll try my best to keep each section somewhat brief, b…
Husband (46M) keeps "helpfully" rearranging, hiding, and disposing of my (46F) stuff--what tactic or wording can I use to stop it? — **I'm getting private messages now so I'll add: please don't repost or use this anywhere else.** TL/DR: husband keeps "helpfully" rearranging, hiding, and disposing of my stuff--what tactic or wordi…
I (36M) feel like I ruined a 3.5 year relationship and don’t know how to move forward — I (36M) feel like I ruined a 3.5 year relationship and don’t know how to move forward I’m 36 and feel like I completely blew up my life and I’m struggling to move forward. I was in a 3.5 year relati…
1.5 Years Update 💀 My predictions became true — No, I do NOT want my ex back—like ever 😭 but I do have a story + some lessons from how everything played out. So basically, about 1.5 years ago, my ex randomly broke up with me out of nowhere. Like……
Small win -- told my NMom "that's not your concern" and really pissed her off — My mother has recently gotten into dumping on me since I was laid off in October and have been living off of unemployment. I'm a freelance reporter on the side and am actively looking for work. I move…
Case 3: A shift in Perspective — **Background Info:** [Nature of Dreams & the abilities therein](https://www.reddit.com/r/Experiencers/comments/1s5zpt7/the_nature_of_dreams_the_abilities_therein/) **Case 3: A shift in Perspective*…
My Boyfriend (28M) thinks the reason why he can't finish is because I'm (20F) too big from the inside. — (English isn't my first language) This is a bit personal, but I'm from a very conservative locality so I have no one to talk to. My boyfriend of 2 years has been great in the bed during the early sta…
My boyfriend (39M) threw his bag at my (33F) face, refused to apologize "because he thought I would block it", then stormed out to leave after I said I just wanted to be alone — Pretty much what the title says. We live separately but visit each other every weekend alternating (about 1.5 hours apart). We've been together 2.5 years. His bag was on the couch with all his clothe…
Intentionally having bad sex? — OK, so this one was a new one to me. I (50f) have been dating a guy (51m) for about two months. Took it semi-slow on having sex by agreement \~6 dates 4+ weeks of dates. First time was wonderful. T…
My boyfriend (M25) saw an old video of me(F24) and was disgusted. How can I get over this? — I never thought I’d be making an advice post on reddit, but everyone in my present life is super split on the issue and can’t really relate. I genuinely don’t know how to fix this. So my boyfriend (M…
My full story 2 weeks since DDay 4 days NC — (Cheater fiancée 26f) (me 26m) (AP 46m) So it all started about 4 to 6 months ago I noticed that her drinking had become a concern she was showing up drunk after work very frequently and it was both…
I (29F) slept with new guy (34M) for the first time and felt he was rude to me. Was he? — Dating a new guy for a month, he was a gentleman and very kind towards me. He very recently just told me how much he liked me and that I’m “pretty but most of all I’m a kind person with a good heart, …
Synchronicity and the Beginning or Continuity of Experience? — To begin, I have had quite a long winded set of experiences, that have seemed to have calmed down a bit over the last few weeks. They went on for several months beginning 3 months and 3 days before my…
The friend zone after sex; how many actually do it? — Relatively quick question just to gauge other experiences. My most recent relationship was short, intensely sexual, and apparently one-sided in romantic attachment as she broke things off after 2 mont…
Regretted messaging her tonight, learn from me — Title says it all, I messaged my ex tonight. It’s not like we were in no contact but we were for a month after the break up, it’s only been a week since then and she’s reached out a few times and so h…
breakthrough trip & the bigger picture — Hello, it's me again. I know that there are people here who enjoy reading my experiences so thus my posting. Obviously a disclaimer is this experience is under the influence of a psychadelic, but it t…
Relationship with a narcissist — Soooo… crazy story you might wanna get some popcorn! I met my ex boyfriend around 5 years ago. We met on Tinder! We went on several dates and really started liking each other but something about his …
My fiancée just left me and I need help knowing where I went wrong… — My fiancée abruptly left me and then blocked me everywhere… I’m Allie (29F) and my ex fiancee is Kylie (32F). We were in a long distance relationship (she lives in France), but we would travel to see…
Girlfriend asked for a 3 week breakup after a fight. I ended it when she asked for more time — I'm 43M, gf is 37F. I'm a doctor, she's a lawyer. I make good money, she's kind of just starting her career. I never skimp out on her... Fancy dinners, nice gifts etc etc. I was planning to give her a…
ex and I hung out…not sure how it went — Ok, I reached out to my ex about a week ago after 3 months of no contact. We started catching up a little over text and I asked if they wanted to be friends in which they told me they were dating some…
My wife (f38) wants me (m42) to be okay with her going speed dating with friend? — The other night we were laying in bed watching a show when she started looking up speed dating sites. She sent one to her friends and said I’ll go with you to support you. I think it’s Thursday dating…
am i childish for not being able tolet go? — its a little complicated we didnt just date and break up, i mean we kinda did but there was a lot before that. im gonna start from the beginning. i will skip a bit of unimportant stuff just keep in m…
Can't stop thinking I have a tumor - seeking support — Hi everyone, A couple of weeks ago I had a routine trip to my local Opticians to update my prescription and by extention get some new glasses. I have pretty terrible eyesight which usually over a 2 …
Husband (29m) and I (33f) disagree. Is counting hours with the baby "unfair"? — I should note were in the conflict zone and so our sleep has been constantly disrupted by sirens. I'm normally with the baby from 8am - 4pm even though my husband is home he is in the other room worki…
How do I (35F) handle my soon-to-be-ex-husband (38M) asking me to change my name back? — Throwaway. Not to be dramatic but last year was the worst year of my life. I got unexpectedly laid off from my job of 8 years in June, and immediately things with my husband of 6 years / partner of 1…
I (29F) found out he (30M) had a girlfriend of 3+ years after dating for 4 months and he FAINTED TWICE — I met this guy through a mutual friend. He had his eye on me for a while via social media and asked my friend about me. My friend then showed me pics of him and I said he’s cute. He would do this thin…
manifestation + past changing — Hi to all of you!! It’s my first ever time writing something on Reddit. Well, I have actually been reading many stories to find courage, but I am new to being the one with the story hahah. Okay, so I …
I would suggest you reread my comment again. I said I didn’t want romantic relationships to take up 80% of my life, which is a major and unsustainable deviation from the normal relationship pattern of…
Thanks for your opinion on my 10% figure. Besides that, I did not say partners should be at my convenience. I said other aspects of life can throw a relationship’s typical patterns out of balance. Ha…
My last astral projection experience well it's pretty intense. I was going super sonic speed up into outer space beyond the cosmos and all of a sudden I heard a pop and my eye was opened and I was in …
So many examples I can think of lol. In general, after our honeymoon phase was over, she deactivated and started pulling away. I assumed this was caused by anxiety, so instead of calling out her dism…
😂😂 I didn’t say that. This is why I’m saying you don’t have a point you’re just arguing with yourself. I didn’t say the most toxic thing APs do is having “too much empathy”. I’ve never mentioned AP…
Amen. I've read every comment up to now without commenting and while there has been some great insight on "how" to show up for an FA partner, the "what happens when they don't like it" insights are la…
This is interesting. my ex was fearful avoidant, and she broke up with me just after 12 days of coming in relationship, and mind you the relationship was at its best at that time. I'm a secure guy,…
I need to vent and word-vomit my story, in this community, as I just found it and it might really help me. Can someone tell me what they think? My avoidant attachment gf broke up with me (anxious att…
Hey everyone, I’d really appreciate some advice or perspective. Yesterday I had an argument with my girlfriend, and it left me feeling pretty low. We hadn’t talked all day, so in the evening I…
meditation. i said meditation
Why do I relate it so much? The whole point I came to reddit and have started my own community, especially for anxious partners to avoidant persons. Avoidant people might not get it but us anxious on…
I just expected him to have any initiative or take action. I'm 100% that person who'd risk being overbearing because when I do see or hear about someone I care about having health issues, I get very p…
Yes I would! If he asked me anything or imposed anything that was for my sake, I would just go with it at that point and then appreciate it. Reposting ny answer to someone else: I just expected him…
I reached out to my FA ex who broke up me with after a month saying the breakup was a good idea and apologizing for my role in the difficulties we had in the relationship. Her reaction to that was goo…
I'm a guy of 50M and am in a relationship with a woman who is 46F We are 2.5 years in a Living-Apart-Relationship. She lives with her childs, I live with mine. We see eachother once a week for one, t…
Previously extremely anxious in relationships, have never gent calm love. But then two years ago I met a man and wewere in the most secure, loving, beautiful relationship. No anxiety, in fact he purs…
I’m hoping someone will say it’s not bad and it’s not a big deal and it’s just my anxious attachment style. But I also want the truth. She apologized for this type of behavior years ago. She told me …
Right, completely valid. It’s hard too when it’s reinforced because it’s real all around us and even statistics back it up. Like even if both partners believe men+women should be equals there’s still …
I understand, I have a DA friend who after like 5 years of friendship + 1 year of being roomates told me "I'd like to become a hermit. I wouldn’t give a shit if nobody in my life ever spoke to me agai…
I acknowledge that I was and still am stupid, I broke contact with him because he scared me. I told him that I was a dismissive avoidant, so the second day we started talking he asked me to spend the …
Long text but I would really appreciate any advice and support 💗 TLDR in the end. I'm meeting up with my avoidant partner after he shut down at the mention of a problem. So my partner (21m) and i …
I was talking about the term ‘connection’ with my boyfriend on the other day. We both agreed that we’ve never felt that even between us or any ppl that we went out on a date. I said that if i think th…
After going out with some friends Friday, one of them I’m not as close with yet but want to be asked me if I want to get coffee sometime at the end of the night. I said yes and to let me know. I was h…
Progressed to being exclusive recently after 10th date (my proposal), and now in a period I'd call probationary as we are (I am) still figuring out how the official label will work out for us. I said …
*Should this be a post or here? I am seeking support and encouragement towards a secure/healthy response, not just validating my withdrawal!* I just put myself in spooked horse mode. Been talking t…
Nine years ago, my boyfriend at the time broke up with me without a clear reason. We lived together, and despite being broken up, continued to have sex and share a bed. One day he told me he was plann…
If he's an adult he'll get it. I said I love you like a month before she said it. We've been together for almost 2 years now and getting engaged this year.
After being promoted by someone on here last week, I asked a guy I was talking to on tinder if he wanted to go for a coffee, he asked me what I was looking for, and I said a relationship but potential…
Do I keep messaging him? I (F37) matched with this guy (M40) on a dating app. The conversation was slow right from the jump. I asked all the questions while he just answered everything and didn't rec…
Blocked a match for the first time today. We had been talking like a week or so. Maybe 2. He asked me if I had valentines plans. I said yes. He then proceed to ask me if I had a date - which I ignore…
Happy Valentines day! I'm not one to celebrate hallmark holidays and I was kinda worried that my boyfriend would want to.... But we're on the exact same page! We were talking the other day about hol…
Vent. My guy came over last night. It was okay. Just felt a little flat. Think we hit our first bump this morning. It’s been over three months. No bf/gf definitions, but we’re not dating anyone else. …
>He is very easy going until he isn’t Couldn't this also be said about you? You couldn't take no for an answer and kept trying to change his mind. >This morning, I wanted to get coffee together af…
I don't think he's a threat in that way, but I don't want him creating drama, especially around my boyfriend. Early in my relationship with my bf we ran into another guy I went on *three* dates with. …
We dated last year for a few months, but ended it because we wanted different things (me a relationship, him, causal). We kept in touch for a bit and the stopped talking until last month. He reached o…
I am definitely being more cautious than people are suggesting. The thing is, we are really good friends, so first and foremost I don't want to lose that relationship. We have done things one on one i…
Yet another bizarre and disheartening OLD experience. Met this girl, we just went for a walk, but hopped in a cafe when it started snowing a lot. The vibe was really good, despite some small language …
No that's not what I said and it's quite a misinterpretation of the situation. I said I had a minor miscommunication with my partner, I did NOT say I was about to end it, you just added that assumptio…
I'm 32/F, one of those people who is super independent to a fault and rarely asks for help. Over the years I've had many friendships and men who were interested in me, but I tended to just friendzone …
Looks like today’s thread got locked by accident so here I am. Went out with a few friends yesterday. At one point one of the girls asked what I thought of a particular guy that was there. I said he …
The yesterday I lamented about being at a loss for words. RECAP: I met someone a few months ago at an event. We had a really good and free flowing chat. After we traded socials and exchanged a few f…
Met a guy online, I thought we hit it off almost instantly. He asked me out before the end of our first date was over and wanted to see me again two days later. I was a little surprised at how quickly…
I recently moved to a new country for work. I met someone through a dating app who is 8 years older than me. In terms of career, I had just graduated and was at the very beginning of my professional j…
Yeah, nothing to lose I guess. What I think happened is that she felt rejected: after our first date (by the time I was already home) she wrote me and offered to bring some food over, because I'd told…
Had a chat with my boyfriend today after I said I think our relationship ran its course since he hasn’t been very communicative, and essentially flipped on me from a pretty damn wonderful human to an …
Swimming is awesome! I've been really into it lately. I did have an old dude hit on me at the pool yesterday by saying I look 20 (??) but overall I just feel so much more relaxed and clear-headed afte…
Yeah, I forgot how much i love swimming. Oh, and I think the old dudes just say what the hell they want. I had one tell me before that I had a great body. Just like that. No chit chat. I said "thank y…
Past couple of weeks have been tough. I've been seeing a guy since mid Jan. Saw him a total of 8 times in the first four weeks. He's sweet and respectful, good communicator, good cook, we generally …
You guys! I finally told my guy friend how I feel about him last night and it went really well. I gave him the valentine I was too nervous to give him before. At first he just stared at it, with a b…
i’m in a really deep and dark hole right now. i am a gay man (26) and grew up in one of the most conservative cities (statistically) in the entire USA. that being said, it’s rough out here in the dati…