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Can you actually explain the job...? Not everyone is American and this so American coded it's silly... My read is: You're having political differences because you took a job with law enforcement and…
Addressing Community Concerns: No Porn/Masturbation Addiction Posts and Self-Hate Posts + Revamped Subreddit Rules — Hello everyone. Over the past few months, I have noticed a significant number of you expressing dissatisfaction with the increasing frequency of posts related to NSFW/porn/masturbation addiction and …
Too Long on First Mission And Moving On — Hello Everyone I know I'll probably be banned for this so let me explain my story. I have been on my first mission for the last 8 months using the index training guide fully and it has been a massive …
How to heal avoidant attachment? — Uhhhh hey gang. Formerly severe fearful avoidant here. The attachment quizzes put everyone somewhere on a quadrant, with the bottom being high avoidance and the right high anxiety. So I was farrrr in …
Is it worth it as a new Laravel coder to buy PhpStorm? — I've been developing Wordpress sites and started branching off into Laravel. Having a great time but a friend said I should ditch VS Code and move to PhpStorm. I'm curious what your opinions are. At $…
When does maximising space/reducing elements go too far? — I'm working on an eCommerce site at the moment, and when it comes to the product category pages, I've had some feedback from my senior to suggest that space needs to be used more efficiently. To name…
Getting rejected every time during the portfolio presentation stage — Hello everyone, I seem to be unable to pass the portfolio presentation phase and now is the fourth time this has happened — Many of these companies are fintech which I have a background in but recentl…
Update on Our Journey to Export Pistachio Butter – Small Wins & Hard Lessons — Hey everyone, A few weeks ago I posted here about our family business in Gaziantep, Turkey — we produce high-quality pistachio butter and are looking to expand internationally. Just wanted to give a…
Should we use Grafana open source in a medium company — I work at a medium-sized company using New Relic for observability. We ingest over 4TB of data monthly, run 20+ services across production and staging, and use MongoDB. While New Relic covers logs, me…
Is there a UX role in existence that doesn't involve so much documentation? — So I come from a background in design. I was a bit of a generalist before—branding, logos, layouts, art direction—and while that was fun, it started to feel fragile. Like I was always one trend away f…
I need you advise am i a UX Jnr Midwieght or more? — **Hi everyone, I need some advice.** I’m currently a Junior UX Designer (30years old) in the UK at one of the top for new broadcasting companies such a Sky BBC ITV etc. **A bit about my background:*…
How do you handle tracking updates + international shipping transparency in Shopify? — One challenge we’ve been facing is managing customer expectations when it comes to international shipping, especially when multiple carriers are involved (like packages moving from 4PX → USPS, or YunE…
Got a 3hr interview coming up. Tips/advice appreciated. — I got through the recruiter screening, a meeting with their main DevOps guy and CTO. I got notified that I'll be moving forward to the next round which is a 3 hour interview with other members of the …
E-commerce Industry News Recap 🔥 Week of May 5th, 2025 — Hi r/ecommerce \- I'm Paul and I follow the e-commerce industry closely for my Shopifreaks E-commerce Newsletter. Every week for the past 3+ years I've posted a summary recap of the week's top stories…
This Week's Top E-commerce News Stories 💥 May 5th, 2025 — Hi r/Shopify - I'm Paul and I follow the e-commerce industry closely for my Shopifreaks E-commerce Newsletter, which I've published weekly since 2021. I was invited by the Mods of this subreddit to s…
Very high traffic website on Shopify — We have a high traffic website on woocommerce (<100 TB bandwidth, around 2M pageviews per month, 12K orders). We use a few dedicated servers currently - one for php, three for DB and 1 for Redis cach…
Overlooked levers in the returns process — Been thinking about how to address refund requests—not returns logistics Everyone I talk to says to optimize logistics, improve product descriptions, promote exchanges, etc…I’m curious: Anyone make …
Warning: Aggressive Tactics from Paperstack – A Cautionary Tale for Store owners seeking funding — Hey fellow builders, I want to share our recent experience with [Paperstack](https://paperstack.ai/), an e-commerce financing provider, to caution others who might be considering their services. We …
Help troubleshoot with removing unwanted bundles feature — Hello, I'm setting up my first shopify store. I'm not sure how, but there's a bundle offer on every product in my store. I'm happy having a bundles option. However, the lowest is 2, and I want people …
Anyone else feeling overwhelmed by how fast AI tech is moving? I will not promote — Anyone else feeling overwhelmed by how fast AI tech is moving? It feels like every week there’s a new AI tool or update — from chatbots to image generators to stuff that can write code or summarize l…
Manager vs. IC when recruiting soon? — Hi all! I have the opportunity and flexibility at my job right now to move up into a managerial role, and I get a lot of freedom in deciding what it looks like. E.g. I could oversee and manage designe…
What do I do with an empty property? — A little background on me first. I’m a dentist, I already own my own practice which I’m not looking to relocate. Next to my practice my there is a 2800 square foot property with a small garden at th…
Junior sysadmin looking for project ideas to modernize a simple infra — Junior sysadmin looking for project ideas to modernize a simple on-prem infra Hey everyone, I’m a junior sysadmin working with a fairly basic on-prem infrastructure with about 45 users, and I’m look…
Shopify Bill Pay - international vendor payments cannot be funded by Shopify Balance anymore — Im not in love with Bill Pay as its so sloppy and support is lazy. Plus they lock down accounts left and right and don't tell anyone. Once the new balance account numbers went out I saw that they were…
How do you make sure nothing falls through the cracks of your business operations? — I work with companies that use a ton of different tools (CRMs, inventory, payments, shipping, etc.). The problem I keep seeing is that things slip through the cracks, and no one realizes until it’s to…
Duolingo leader throws shade at r/UXDesign — You all might remember this thread a few months ago, [debating Duolingo renaming UX to “Product Experience.”](https://www.reddit.com/r/UXDesign/comments/1j3hvkw/duolingo_renames_ux/) The VP Mig announ…
How can I let devs update their lower environment terraform while protecting production environments? — I know the title is a rather open ended question, but let me lay out where I am now, in the hopes of getting ideas on how to do this better. For a given service, we'll have one directory for environm…
What concerns, besides price, would you have as a home owner if offered window cleaning services? — I'm just starting out and the only experience I have getting new customers for thos kind of bussiness is by neighbour's walking up and asking for a quote. I'd give a quote and 90% of the time they'd …
Overtraining and being effective — Wanted to share about a recent breakthrough I had in being effective and getting things done. Like many of you, I believe that being physically fit is a huge part of operating at peak efficiency. Whe…
A Metaphor for Avoidance? — Saw this & couldn't help but think it was quite moving.
If I could just stop deactivating!! (FA) — Follow up from some of my previous posts. I’m deactivating again. I think? Or maybe lost feelings for my partner and I’m just lying to myself and not wanting to let go. The thought of that makes me cr…
Starting over — Heya, I don’t want this to be a negative thread— looking for some positivity and hope maybe? I (34F) am recently out of a one year relationship. It was my first secure relationship in my entire adult…
Anxious attachment spiraling? — Hi everyone :) (26F and 25M) I’m in a healthy relationship, we have our disagreements but overall we work things out. We’ve been together for about a year and 3 months. Lately, I’m feeling overwhel…
The most painful relationship and breakup I've ever had, but it cracked me open so that I could heal. I created a text message llm analysis tool that revealed insecure attachment. — EDIT - TLDR; 8-month, high-intensity relationship. I was DA-leaning; she showed a lot of push–pull/negative lensing. We loved each other and still couldn’t repair, so we went NC. Post-breakup I focuse…
I need some FA to give me insights on this situation — Break up with a FA need some insights Hi guys, i really need some insights as someone whos desire is to be a safe space for a FA girl. Breakup context: I (M, 23) was in a 2-year relationship with my…
I think I'm in the process of healing, but it hurts so much. Feeling very forgotten and abandoned tonight — I truly recognize and see how much I've grown and how far I've come. I have so much self awareness, gotten good at soothing myself, talking to myself, even managing anxiety attacks. It's not always pe…
Success Story: FA/Disorganized Attachment Healing Roadmap, Resource Recommendations — **Hello, fellow Fearful Avoidants! The below post has grown out of almost 3 years of research and healing this attachment style, which in my case was coupled with Relationship OCD (ROCD). ROCD is a vi…
Struggling with friend moving — My best friend just moved to be stationed by the army. She’s secure leaning so it’s not about her. I am having all the symptoms of anxious attachment - depressed, afraid she’ll die, missing her when s…
I earned secure attachment in 4 months... — I can't believe I'm writing this. I did this without dating a secure person and without spending money on courses/apps. I promise I'm not selling anything. Big disclaimers: * I am only mostly secure…
First Time Serious Connection With an Avoidant — I was in a relationship with an avoidant for around 3 months and everything was going well and we weren't moving too fast in my opinion. We had gone on dates and met each other's families. They had be…
learning to trust with new potential partners — What do you think are some healthy ways to slowly trust someone again in a romantic context so if things go wrong it doesn't feel like moving on is like an impossible task emotionally? I don’t mean t…
How do avoidant dynamics move forward — and when do they not? — I’m trying to understand where the line is between someone genuinely moving slowly due to avoidant attachment, versus someone who just doesn’t have the capacity (or intention) to move forward. I’ve b…
FA breakup & prolonged limbo - does avoidance calcify over time or can it still reverse? — I’m hoping to hear from people who’ve been through something similar, FAs, or anyone who has opinions on this. I was in a 2 year relationship with someone I later realized is fearful avoidant (I didn…
"Love bombing" and anxious attachment — At tonight's Anxious Attachment Healing Group meeting, we read the following reading: **1. “Love bombing” and anxious attachment** “Love bombing” is a pattern of excessive, intense affection and at…
When does the relationship clock start? — I (42F) met my bf (36M) in September on a dating app. We dated for five weeks, then I ended things because he said he wasn’t ready for a relationship (mental health struggles). We didn’t talk for two …
so what is ”healthy”? — so i’ve read over the several attachment style subs and something interesting i’ve found is that on the anxious side people are talking about how the society is pushing us to be hyper-independent and …
Is this an emotional affair? — I (36F, single), have a good guy friend (40M) who has been dating a new woman for 2 ish months now. Full disclosure I don’t like her very much and I think they’re moving super fast (already saying I …
Is "good on paper" a thing for guys our age? — I can't help but feeling like I'm good on paper and that's why my boyfriend is with me. I'm conventionally attractive, I make really good money, I take care of myself (and him) and my things, I'm kin…
How do you think this Total Lunar Eclipse on march 3 might interact with an already high-activation zodiac year? — With the Total Lunar Eclipse on March 3 coming up, I’ve been thinking about how eclipses function when they occur during a year that’s traditionally considered fast-moving or catalytic within the 60-y…
DA’s - Do You Know When You’re Deactivating? — When you’re deactivating, do you know that’s what’s happening? If you were unaware of your attachment style or attachment theory, would you still have a sense of what’s going on? Had some intimacy …
My friend felt stuck for years - in session we found a core belief that life is only suffering — I did a quantum healing session for my friend Ramona and honestly what came up was intense. She has felt stuck for a long time. Putting things off, hard to get moving, hard to create, hard to do even…
So.. id classify myself as a relatively spiritual person.. over the last few months ive tried meditating 5 or so times.. ive had sleep paralysis about 5 times as well in my life.. more so in the last …
Hey try to imagine your body going down and down every time your breath out that should help you get into a trance state. Like feel you body moving thru your bed and down and down
A lot of sources say you have to absolutely stop moving when trying to project, but this seems impossible to me because of my adhd. The same thing with meditation, I can't just focus on my breath or s…
Preach! I used to always skip these posts about not getting my ex back, but now I’m happy to be moving on, it’s much healthier and I don’t feel like shit everyday. The more you accept that you don’t w…
I’m trying to do this currently. I still love her the same but i’m moving on with my life.
Yeah, I feel so much at peace now that I decided I am moving on and not looking back. Fuck him.
I’m definitely trying moving on. He didn’t want me so fuck that! I know I’m a great person who deserves more!
Yes!! it took me 8 months to completely cut the cord with all the BS after we broke up because he wanted to linger on but he was moving on with other girls while he had me like stupid hanging on. And …
In my experience, No Contact is for you first and foremost as a human being to heal and be a better version of you. If (and I mean IF) your ex contacts you, consider it icing on the cake. And hearing …
Im struggling so hard with moving on, even though it wasnt my fault that we broke up. It feels awful
Can someone explain what the fuck just happened to me. I was trying to fall asleep and when i finally succeeded i woke up again at like 3 am i realised I couldn’t move it felt like i was moving but wh…
It’s hard moving on when you’re still so in love w/ them. I can’t get him out of my head. Idk how to move on and thinking about it hurts more bc I never wanted it to end to begin with. I lost my soul …
Happened to me yesterday that’s why I’m here . First it felt like my feet were levitating off the bed a bit then 20 seconds or so later it felt like I was being pulled quickly off the bed . Didn’t fe…
no, you are missing the HUGE part of what I said "and not do any of those things enough to want to get back together". It is almost UNIVERSAL unless you did truly heinous shit like rape / abuse, etc. …
Or don't. If you reach out and they shoot you down, then moving on gets easier. While you're pretending not to care, you're still holding out hope and hope stops you from moving on. Leave it all on t…
No contact is NOT about getting the ex back! It’s about truly moving on, breaking free mentally, emotionally and spiritually. It’s about freeing yourself and truly letting go. It’s not meant to be a …
Something my therapist said to me yesterday: closure in these situations has to come from within you, since the other person has opted to disconnect. I chose to write a letter to my STBX before our …
None of it *should* stop you from moving forward and healing, but for some people it still nevertheless does. I'm sorry, I know you said this more than half a year ago but I'm going through my situati…
Omg I relate SO much to what you are saying. When my ex's affair was discovered he was remarkably cruel to me. He wasn't sure he wanted to continue in our marriage and refused to cut things off with h…
What does that look like??? Find a new hobby. Anything. Try learning to knit. Learn to build robots. Take a class in 17th century blacksmithing. Join a woodworkers guild. Join an improve troupe. Volu…
Wonderful information in the introduction. I would love to get some personal insight from people who are familiar with Astal Projection. I'll keep it as short as possible. I have recently discovered t…
Yes it's few. Can take months, but a change or at the very least some thoughts of thinking from the desire will be noticed within 2 - 3 weeks, IF you are doing the technique correctly. And they may ev…
I discovered that both statements work equally, it probably depends on how accustomed we are to the statement I think. Specifically how well we experience the meaning of the words we use. If we can us…
It sounds like a hard job to decide what can stay and what should be removed. Say there was a post with a comment that could be taken negatively by the OP. Is that grounds for removing the comment? Wh…
Yeah I've seen a lot of increase in those posts too. I don't think is the subreddit to tell everyone else that NC led you to get back with your ex, first of all is giving everybody false hopes or unre…
Right. It’s starting to feel like a circle jerk (that I am definitely a part of). I think people get confused because of the cognitive dissonance of them being caring and love bombing and then neglect…
I have been doing it but you have words to what the whole process could be. Made me more attentive. Moving forward all the emotions that erupt there will be an and .. to ground myself :) thank you!
Yeah I think that too but I'm sure Swift is an FA through and through. Her lyrics are so highly charged, often moving between stages of idealization and wanting outright distance from her partners, so…
I get it. As sweet as that sounds, if somebody is moving fast after one or two dates by buying presents then I'd say the onus falls on them to read the room better and take a step back. At that point …
Going into a new relationship isn’t moving on, it’s just to distract. Avoidants are great at hiding their anxiety, they charm well. But unhealed, it’s just gonna be surface situationships all the time
Rejection is the absolute worst. I also have rsd as well because of my ADHD and any lack of interest from my partner just sends me into deep panic. I've worked fairly hard myself in regulating these …
Thanks for such valuable advice. It meant a lot. I'm in sp situation. And when other person is envolved things get tricky... I'm doing my best to visualize. Sometimes it felt like it can happen. Wh…
I know this is difficult to do, but my advice, as an anxious who's moving towards secure, would be to stop texting and calling. It's only been a few days and you know that he was having phone problems…
I've been in this exact situation when I was an FA in a LDR with another FA in another country. And our f2f time was very little like yours but we spoke daily, intensely and talked and had plans. I kn…
You probably overwhelmed him. Even for someone secure (taking him at his word that that is what he was), it can happen. It's happened to me, and it was difficult to get across in any kind of wording t…
Yeah and it's not that avoidants are lying, they actually like the love bombing stage. They actively choose to instigate that. U never see AA lovebombing avoidants in the beginning. Avoidants are l…
When you shame them for becoming distant, or misconstrue that distance as them hating you. Being too emotionally overbearing, *without explanation*. Being narcissistic or abusive, which is a given. Re…
It really is. Being in a relationship isn't removing your autonomy.
Don’t worry, I understand that my phrasing was a bit strong. What I meant was that ‘removing autonomy’ can also go under being abusive/unintentionally toxic (for example, making them feel like they ar…
These push-pull dynamics can be really tough. There's actually a whole cycle that happens, and understanding how it works is probably the only surefire way to ultimately get grounded enough to ride th…
Gees what a nightmare!!! I hope u find a way to feel safer like I would consider moving to a difference city even. I think people like that should be in a maximum security mental hospital for life.
Maybe it’s worthwhile just fixing the app now to get it in a better working state with what you have, before moving onto a new cloud provider? If the code can’t handle it in your current provider, c…
As the others mentioned fixing your app is priority number one, however, I find it very weird that just one request blocks your whole server. You should try to find the bottleneck before moving clouds…
Work on an observability team. I stood up grafana with influx, ran that for a few years, then we moved to a vendor. Grafana itself is pretty simple to run, it’s the backend data sources that are not…
You should definitely know the basics. Performing automated backups, performing application table migrations, establishing connections using secrets, etc. But you don't need to be an expert on how to …
Fair play, I’m so happy for you. I’m also a sysadmin with decade of experience with Win, Mac and Linux, and have been helping out my company with devops stuff every opportunity I get (pipelines, ter…
I am actually working on something like this on my weekends. There are tons of moving parts to this and lots of decisions at each layer. As much as I hate k8s you are definitely missing out on some o…
If you are getting wrist pain at all, there is something not right. Get an ergonomic assessment. Don't just guess or get equipment haphazardly. Moving the chair up or down a half inch makes a differ…
Maybe set up a lab and start studying the stuff you don't know well. That's my best suggestion because it's what works for me. I spend a lot of time inside and outside of work hours studying, both han…
Cloudflare offers a really generous free tier, then a very cheap tier that is good for even quite large applications. You only start paying big money on enterprise plans. I'm pretty sure that alone e…